Title: Begin Again

Fandom: Naruto

Pairing: Sasue x Sakura

Summary: Because this is not where they end but where they begin again.

Notes: The first chapter is well the 'ending'- in the sense that it is here that the slump for this pairing has started- which is obviuosly them trying to kill each other. The next chapter will be where they 'begin again.' Its only a two shot, though the next chapter is quite hard to write...any suggestions?

Basically im just trying to regain my faith in this pairing. So please Read and Review. I'd like to know what you think about it. I accept flames with a pinch of salt and thrive on constructive criticism. I absolutely love though i dont expect encouraging reviews.

All in all, I just want to know what you think of this piece of writing. Thank You :)

Begin Again

by

October Languor

Sakura often found herself lost in haze of nostalgia; a haze that would paint vividly across her mind, the pictures, the moments, and the essence of the ephemeral Team Seven.

But more than anything else, this haze served to sweeten his memory. The memory of his fierce protectiveness, his parting gratitude; everything intensified her love for him, her faith in him.

She lived for the day when Sasuke would return; she grew stronger for that day.

However, no matter how much she tried, the nostalgic haze failed to con her, it failed to inspire the idealistic that resided within her; because she may be weak, she may be a burden, but she is not a fool. She knew that she was his team mate and nothing more;

but nothing less either.

-x-

As a girl, she had spent hours ruminating over the circumstances that would surround his return.

As a girl, she committed the folly of harbouring within him, her faith.

A faith that was tragically shattered when greeted with Sasuke's cold and determined eyes at Orochimaru's abandoned lair.

Sakura,

Thank you

-x-

When she heard that Sasuke had killed Itachi, she had- albeit timorously- dared to hope that Sasuke would return to the village, now that his life goal was achieved. He did not, of course. And although it hurt Sakura, it did not surprise her.

But that did not ameliorate the pain that seized her every time she saw him. Because every time she did, she found him lost deeper in the labyrinth of darkness and hatred, he had himself created in his quest to achieve his goal; so much so that even when he had accomplished his ambition, he had been unable to find his way back home. His way back to her.

Every time they confronted each other, he would hurt the ones she loved, every time, he would stray deeper into his personal maze.

-x-

As she and Naruto got closer thanks to their common goal, she realised that he had become more than a friend to her but she still did not know whether or not she loved him.

She could not understand the panic that gripped her body as she watched Hinata confess to him.

She did not want to know if she wanted to understand.

-x-

When Sai told her of how encumbered Naruto really was, she could not help but feel her heart beat heavily with a metallic resonance at the prospect of Naruto dying in his pursuit for Sasuke; all because of his promise to her.

After Tsunade, Sakura refused to lose anybody else who had nurtured her and helped her become who she was. She was ready to do anything, even kill the love of her life if she had to, if it meant that she would save those who had helped her in her time of need.

If it meant that it would accredit Sasuke's soul even a little; for she knew she could not salvage it.

At the very least, she would release Naruto from his burdening promise.

-x-

She went upto Naruto and told him that she loved him. That he needn't endanger himself for her sake.

She could not help but feel hurt when he told her she was lying and that he was not doing it for her alone anymore. But as the surprise at her boldness-she would not have been able to do the same had it been Sasuke, and the embarrassment of rejection settled in her gut, it only strengthened her resolve.

It was time, for Sasuke's end.

-x-

When asked again, years later, whether she had loved Naruto, she would admit rather cheerfully that yes, she had loved Naruto, more than a friend should and definitely not in the way a sister should. What with Sasuke being manipulated to the hilt, trying to destroy everything she loved, trying to destroy her? She had the right to be confused!

However, despite having admittedly harboured a transient love for Naruto, she always maintained that she may have given up hope on Sasuke, that she may have been disappointed with him, but she had never stopped loving him.

-x-

Naruto's faith in Sasuke was like a fountain of strength, like a panacea. The sheer determination in his faith, in his drive to get Sasuke back aided him in overcoming obstacles he would have died trying to without.

Conversely, on Sakura, that same faith and that same drive had the opposite affect. Undoubtedly, it had helped her become a stronger person, but never strong enough.

So that when she resolved to kill Sasuke, she learnt in a heart piercingly painful blow that she needn't have gone through the trouble to kill him, the boy she had loved was already dead. That despite knowing that, she she was unable to physically kill him. Because he was Sasuke. And that was reason enough.

Sasuke rarely thought of Konoha, and the few times that he did, the flash of the Uchiha compound laden with dead bodies compelled him to review his battle plans.

However, it seemed that after his inopportune meeting with his former team mates he could not stop thinking about Konoha- of the farce that was committed against his clan, of the pointed stares, of Team Seven.

Caught in the web of nostalgia, he remembered his childhood. He longed for the carefree afternoons spent in his mother's lap, the rigorous mornings when he trained with his father and caught in his eyes a gleam of pride, the joyful evenings when he would eagerly listen to his brother's stories wanting nothing more than to follow in his footsteps.

He watched his hands as for the first time ever, he questioned what he really wanted. Boy, Naruto was annoying!

Sighing deeply, he remembered the overwhelming sense of guilt that blazed through his body after he had killed his brother. That guilt had eaten him inside out, since that day. It had left him hollow.

This whole mess had started because of Konoha's orders to Itachi to eradicate his clan.

Itachi had done whatever he had done to protect Konoha.

Konoha had destroyed his clan, his brother, him.

Konoha was to blame.

He repeated this like a mantra. It was all he needed to know. He had come too far.

But for a moment. Only a moment. He wondered, whether destroying Konoha would be like killing Itachi? Had he killed Sakura, would that same guilt sweep over him?

She was nothing more than an ex team mate. But once, in another world, his team had been his only family.

-x-

Sasuke had trained and trained and trained, but he was unable to purge himself of his emotions. So instead, he had mastered the art of blockading them, of bottling them up in an abysmal chasm, of feigning apathy. When he fought, his emotions ran parallel but his emotionless facade superseded them. Nonetheless, he always felt something, be it pity or contempt.

Just because he did not show emotions, did not mean he did not feel them.

-x-

When Sakura had asked him to take her with him, he had been annoyed at her persistence, but when he saw the steely but determined look in her eyes he knew that there was more to her request than she was letting on.

He decided to humour her, surprised at her submission as she carefully walked over to Karin.

But his doubt never ceased, he thought it better to kill her then and there.

If she would stay with him, she would just end up being like him.

When Sasuke realised her intent, thanks to Kakashi-who had not only saved her but also exposed her motive-he had been stunned.

At that moment he did not have to feign apathy. He truly was emotionless.

But that was before rage took over; before he watched her out of the corner of his eye, charging at him bearing only a kunai in hand, to stab him in the back.

Because in that moment, in her, he saw a flicker of himself.

He was reminded of the time he had killed his brother.

He had idolised his brother, mush as she had him, in a different sense of course.

He decided then that would have to nip this in the bud. This annoyance, this guilt had to end. He would do to her, what his brother should have done to him.

But then she faltered, and with that his rage intensified. Even she had seen and been able to distinguish between…between what?

Right and Wrong?

No. There was no wrong or right here.

She had been able to tell which path was more damning. And he hadn't.

The self-loathing exacerbated his fury and just when he was going to stab her with her kunai, Naruto swept her away.

He did not remember the last time, he was that mad.

To be continued...

I wrote this while preparing for my finals, i just didn't feel like studying! i almost failed chem thanks to this. Sigh.

Anyway, do read and leave a review, the second chapter is confusing to no end and will take a copious amount of effort, so i'd like to know SOMEONE will read it.

Oh and the title is the title of a song by Colbie Caillat- donno if i spelt that right... n the summary is a line from the song- it just seemd to fit!

Thanks a ton!

October Languor.