"I feel embarrassed."

"About what?"

"Crying."

She closes her eyes and leans her head back on the towel folded neatly and resting on the porcelain. Long day. Long few weeks. She's not sure why she let him in, except she didn't' feel like making anything up.

"You shouldn't be embarrassed. I've seen you cry before, it's not a big deal."

"Yes, well, not during… well not even during but…" Shrugging, she keeps her eyes shut. He thinks she's been avoiding him. She has, but not because of the reason he thinks. "I'm just feeling sorry. For myself. And for breaking down on you like that."

"I didn't mind." She hears him crouching down next to her and then she feels a warm palm on her head, brushing her hair out of her eyes. So she opens them and he's there. He's always there, which is part of the problem (and the solution if she's lets it be). "Addison, I didn't mind."

"You should."

He laughs. "Why?"

"It wasn't fair to you," she says, folding her arms against the rim of the tub and resting her chin on them. "You had a horrible day too, and I... I feel like I made it worse."

"Hardly." He's not lying, or just being nice. Naked Addison is pretty much guaranteed to always put him in a better mood, no matter what the circumstances. Case in point today; a patient flat-lined on his table, but her skin glistens with the droplets of the bathwater. "You avoiding me makes my days worse."

"I wasn't – okay, I was. I'll stop."

"Please," he stresses while idly running a finger down the back of her neck.

"Sam?"

"Mmh?" He's distracted by the length of her back and the gentle curve of her shoulder. Just a few days ago he was running his hands over that bare, soft skin, until he was jolted from his blissful exploration by the sound of her breath hitching in his ear. She's alluring, and still unknown, and Sam's a gentleman, but a man all the same, and she's beautiful.

"What do you think is going to happen?" It's a question she wants answered in every sense of the word. Together, apart, she wants to know what will happen. As usual, her impulsivity, her need to fix everything with an orgasm and physical contact ended poorly, though that final step was never taken. Instead, she sobbed into the crook of his neck as he carried her upstairs, wrapping her in a blanket and his arms.

"With us?"

"Yeah."

"Well," Sam says, exhaling, loosening the knot on his tie and bringing his knees to his chest, "I know what I want to happen. I want to be with you. I want us to be together."

"Even though I cry during foreplay," she deflects with a grin.

"Yes," he nods, mock-solemnly, "even though. I want you to stop avoiding me – "

"I said I would – "

"And I don't want us, when there is an us, to be a secret. I want it to be real."

She considers him for a second, reaching out a soapy arm to stroke his cheek. "Charlotte and Cooper, Pete and Violet… If we do this, Sam, it's just going to be us. Not many people left to lean back on."

"We can lean on each other. It's pretty much what we've been doing for years now, so I think we'll be okay."

"And… we're going to have to take things slow. Every step. I know it might be frustrating at times, but I know me and if we rush things," she shakes her head in an attempt to clear it of past mistakes. He knows all of them anyway, but she wants to stop dwelling on them, even if she can't forget.

"We can go as slow as it takes," Sam says, meaning it. The step between not being with Addison to being with Addison is the only step that matters right now. Sex or no sex, co-habitation, marriage, children maybe, hopefully, it's all about her. He's so close his heart is thudding in his chest, his head ringing with the sounds of possibility. "Okay?"

"Okay," she agrees, smiling softly and beautifully. "One step at a time and… I think we can do this."

Hesitantly, Sam presses his head against her forehead, waiting with bated breath until she brings her mouth to his.

"Sam?"

"Mmh?" he mumbles into her lips, pressing his against hers again and again, his hand strong and steady against the curve of her jaw.

"Want to take the first step into the tub?"

"Yeah," he says easily, quickly, as her damp fingers toy with the button of his shirt, "but in the name of going slow, I'll promise to stay on my side."