Title: I can't get no satisfaction…
Fandom: Chobits
Author: kira
Chars/Pairs: Hideki/Chi, Sumomo, Kotoko
Genres: romance
Warnings: none
Word Count: 500
Summary: Hideki takes a look at his life and decides it is more satisfying than it appears to be…

Author's note: In the Chobits anime, Chi refers to Hideki's porn collection as his "yummies." Also in both the manga and anime, Hideki is unable to have sex with Chi because her on/off switch is located in her vagina and if he did, it would reset her programming and she would no longer be the "Chi" that he has come to love, so he never gets any. ;p

Author's note 2: This took 3rd place at LJ's Hentai Contest.

888

"Hideki, Chi has some yummies for you." The pretty blonde persocom handed him a stack of girlie magazines. She smiled.

He took them graciously, returning her smile. "Thank you, Chi."

"You're welcome, Hideki." She knelt and sat back on her heels. "Is Hideki going to look at his yummies now?"

He laughed. "No, I think I'll save that for later." Reaching out, he ruffled her hair.

"He's just waiting for us to go out," Kotoko said dryly. The tiny persocom rolled her eyes.

"Go where?" Sumomo, another small persocom chimed in.

"Anywhere, you idiot. He doesn't like an audience."

"I'm here, you know," Hideki said dryly. In the six years he had been living with his 'harem," things somehow never changed, not that he cared. When he thought about, it was not the most sexually satisfying relationship he would have like to have had, but he something more. He had "love" and if having a normal sex life with Chi was the price he had to pay, then he was happy to pay it.

So while the two smaller persocoms argued over who knew where to find the best porn on the net for Hideki, he was busy gathering Chi into his arms. She sat comfortably in his lap, resting her head against his chest while he laid his cheek on top of her head.

"Chi is happy Hideki is her 'special person just for me.'"

"I'm happy too." Well, I would be happier if I didn't have to run to the bathroom and jerk off in a few, but I think… no, I know, I would be more unhappy if I had to give you up, Chi… Hideki heaved a long suffering sigh. "Would you two shut up already? You both know good porn sites, okay?"

"Fine," Kotoko answered tartly. Folding her arms across her chest, she looked away, the bells in her hair tinkling softly, muttering softly to herself about living in some sappy melodrama full of lunatics.

Sumomo giggled. "Aww… They're so cute together!" She was about to launch into her happy dance of joy, complete with a song, when Kotoko reached out, pulling the ditzy redhead towards her.

"Can't you see they want to be alone?" she hissed.

"How…?"

"Let me explain," Kotoko began as they sat facing away from Hideki and Chi, her barely audible explanation broken by oohs and aahs from the ditzy redhead. "And that is why that sweet romantic idiot, otherwise known as Hideki, is sitting there with a bad case of blue balls and a raging hard-on, instead of getting some."

Sumomo looked over her shoulder at the happy couple and giggled. "I still think they look very satisfied to me, Kotoko."

"That's because you're an idiot too."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

The two small persocoms argued back and forth.

"Hey! Behave!" Hideki said. I guess this is what it's like being married with two kids… no sex and a permanent referee job… It may not look satisfying, but it is…