A/N: I'm so glad to be back. Welcome back to anyone who has followed me here from Just for Tonight and hello to anyone who is trying out my writing for the first time. This will be a very different story from my last one. I'm hoping I've learned a lot and I won't make as many mistakes as I did last time round. (I'm not promising anything though.) I'm going to try to update every week if possible but that might stretch to once a fortnight if things get busy and for that I apologise in advance.

There are a few pieces of background you need to know. This story is set approximately eight years after the end of Season 3. Everything from Season 3 happened by nothing after that. (Or at least I assume nothing after that. I'll be extremely surprised if the plot of Season 4 bears any resemblance to the background of this story.) Finally this story works on the premise that when Blair and Serena returned to New York after the summer Dan was gone. He never returned and Blair hasn't heard anything about him since. As the story progresses you'll find out what has happened to both Blair and Dan in the intervening period.

Before I start I'll get the disclaimer out of the way. I do not own any of the Gossip Girl characters. I'm merely manipulating them for my own amusement and I'm certainly not making any money out of this. Now let's get to the story and I'm sorry for the slow start. A bit of background is necessary.

Blair grabbed the last box from the removal van and turned to face the stairs of her new apartment. She had finally done it. This was all hers. She had been in London now for almost a year and in that time had been constantly living in shared, rented accommodation. A raise at work had finally allowed her to rent her own place. Over the year she had come to love her roommate Melissa like a sister but she had really needed her own space for a while now. There was no denying that she would miss her friend horribly but she could hardly wait to finally have the independence she had craved since leaving New York. She was desperate to prove that she could do this on her own.

She looked up at the apartment building. It was small, just four floors with two apartments on each level, except for the top floor which had four. She was at the top. Unfortunately with it being an older style building there was no elevator and this had led to herself, Melissa and Melissa's boyfriend Jay spending the best part of a day lugging boxes up and downstairs. Fortunately she was renting the place furnished. She wasn't sure she could have managed moving anything heavier than her bookcase, which was the biggest item she had brought with her from the apartment she had shared with Melissa. As it was it had taken some difficult manoeuvring for the three of them to get that around the corners of the stairs. Now she took a deep breath and began to ascend one final time with the last of her belongings.

When she finally reached her floor Melissa and Jay were waiting for her and she added her final box to the pile in the centre of her sitting room. The apartment was fairly small and the kitchen and sitting room were separated only by a counter. There was also one bedroom and a bathroom, but what had endeared it to her was the large window in the sitting room, complete with window seat looking out over the street below. These days she wasn't always so keen on participating in her own life, to the constant annoyance of the pair currently standing in her living room, but she loved the opportunity to observe other people. This window would be the ideal place to do just that. There was also a small communal garden at the back of the building, a rarity in the city. She had only heard about this apartment coming up for rent through a friend of a work colleague and once more she thanked her lucky stars because she knew it would have been snatched up in a flash if she hadn't gotten in first.

The late afternoon sunshine shone through the window, catching the surfaces and making her realise exactly how much of a good clean this place needed. That could wait however because right now she was starving.

Jay was obviously thinking along similar lines as he handed her the phone and said, "I believe pizza was promised in return for my help with this particular endeavour Miss Waldorf."

She smiled at him in response, "You know I'd never back out of an agreement. Pepperoni, onions and mushrooms I take it?" She reeled off his favourite pizza toppings without thinking and called to place their order, also asking for another with peppers and fresh tomato for herself and Melissa to share. While they waited for the pizzas to arrive they moved the boxes to the appropriate parts of the apartment. Each was labelled bedroom, bathroom, kitchen or living room; despite the fact the last two were actually more or less the same room. By the time they finished the food had arrived and they settled down on the sofa, making short work of the pizza after their exertions of that afternoon. When they finished Blair sat back, satisfied that for the time being she was no longer hungry.

"Listen guys thanks so much for your help today. I would have been lost without you."

Jay pulled her to her feet and into a gigantic hug, "You're welcome sweetheart. I know how important you are to Melissa so as far as I'm concerned that makes you family to me too. Now I've got to get to work." Jay worked nights at a local bar where he played piano and this made Blair doubly grateful that he had given up his whole Saturday to help her with her move. He turned to Melissa and asked, "Are you coming just now or are you going to wait here with Blair a while longer?"

"I'll be a while longer I think. You know I could never leave my girl here to deal with all of this on her own."

Jay nodded, "Fair enough, I'll see you tonight." With that he was gone and the two girls were left to deal with the rest of the clutter.

Blair flopped back down on the sofa and stared about her despairingly. "Remind me again why I'm here."

Melissa grinned beside her, "Because your best friend's a bitch who decided she wanted to move in with her boyfriend and tossed you out of your home."

Blair sighed at hearing her friend's guilt, even through the slightly jokey tone she had employed for that comment. "We've been through this Mel. I want you to be happy and you hardly threw me out into the cold snow. Besides this is the push I needed, I swear. Look at me, I'm almost 28 years old and I've never lived alone. Unless you count the first few weeks after I got here but I was in a hotel so I really don't think you can. It'll be good for me to finally have some independence. It'll force me to stand on my own two feet. You know how much I'll miss you but I can do this."

At that Melissa held her hands up in defeat, "Fine I believe you. Go and be all independent but first let me help you sort this place out."

Blair sighed with relief, "I was really hoping you'd say that."

It was at times like this that she really missed her days as an Upper East Side, pampered, princess. She would quite literally have given her right arm to have Dorota and an army of hired help to put her new apartment to rights, but as it was, it was just her and Mellissa

They unpacked box after box and cleaned as they went. Blair scrubbed down worktops and put crockery and silverware away while Melissa did the floors. Blair cleaned the bathroom while Melissa vacuumed the carpet in the bedroom and made Blair's bed. This was stupidly one of the things Blair had been most worried about doing on her own and she knew that the next time she would be. Putting a cover on a double duvet is not an easy task and one she had never accomplished without Melissa's help. Maybe she'd just replace it with blankets.

Finally they were down to one final box and Blair indicated the bottle of wine on the counter, "I think we deserve a break don't you?"

Melissa groaned, "You know if we take a break now it'll be an all night break."

Blair grabbed the bottle and two glasses from the cupboard. "Then let's make it an all night break. I've had more than enough for one day."

At that Mellissa collapsed onto the sofa. "Thank God for that. I was seriously about to drop. I can't take anymore."

Blair joined her and poured them both a large glass of wine. "I agree, enough is enough. I'm not even sure what's in that final box so it can't be that important can it?" With anybody else she would probably have gotten away with that supposedly flippant comment but she caught Mellissa looking at her strangely and cursed how well the other girl had grown to know her.

"So that means that's the most important box of all. The one you want to open when I'm not here. Sweetie you could have just said. I would never intrude and you know that. Everyone's entitled to a little privacy now and then, even if we have lived in each other's pockets for the last year."

Blair sighed, "Fine, I admit it, that box has some personal things in it and I'd really rather be alone when I open it."

"Blair, I've known you for a year and I didn't even realise you owned personal things. You never talk about your past and I've never even seen a picture of your family."

"It's just possible that I sealed up that particular box when I moved here from the States and I haven't opened it since," Blair said sheepishly as she took a large swallow of her wine.

"My God, you're kidding me. Are you sure you want to open it on your own then? Couldn't you use a little moral support? You know you've never told me why you came here."

"You never asked," Blair said in response.

"I never asked because every time I even mentioned the States I could see the tension coming off you in waves. Blair, when I first met you, you had this brittleness, like you were only just holding on and if I pushed you too hard you'd just break into a thousand pieces. There was no way I was going to risk asking about your past."

"I know that and I am sorry. I can't thank you enough for putting up with me back then. There was a lot going on and I just wasn't ready to talk about it. You helped me to be a stronger person and I can't thank you enough. If you hadn't been sitting at the next desk on my first day of work I genuinely don't think I'd be the person I am now."

"Sweetie it was a pleasure. You know I've never really had a close girlfriend before. I was always a bit of tomboy growing up; it was all climbing trees and playing football. Once I got older it was like I'd forgotten how to be friends with a girl so that's what you gave me. That had better not change. I'll only be a few streets over you know, so you're not getting rid of me that easily."

At that Blair felt the tears well up in her eyes. "I don't want to get rid of you. As much as I want to be independent there's a big part of me that is absolutely terrified at the thought of living my life without you in the next room, so don't worry you'll be hearing from me almost constantly. I can promise you that much at least."

"Promise me something else as well then Blair."

"What's that?"

"Don't use this new place as an excuse to retreat into yourself again. I feel like over the last couple of months you've finally joined the rest of us in the world. You've actually started to socialise and were finally getting out and meeting some people other than me and Jay. If I catch even the slightest sniff of you using your own place to retreat into yourself I'll be round here to drag you back to mine quicker than you can draw breath. Jay will just need to deal with it."

"I promise I've got no intention of doing that Mel. I've worked too hard to get to the point I'm at now to slip backwards. You know I'm not suddenly going to become a social butterfly but I've got no intention of becoming Miss Havisham either."

"I'm so glad. You really don't belong alone Blair, no matter what you might think."

Blair sat back and thought about that last comment and took another large mouthful of wine to avoid a response. The truth was that she wasn't so sure that her friend was right. She'd believed for some time now that there was a very good chance she did belong on her own. Fundamentally it was easier that way and it would take a lot to change her mind.