"Draco Malfoy's Guide of Seduction"

Chapter One : The Bet

Disclaimer : Blah blah blah. Only thing I own is the idea, kay?

Author's Note : Hey, there kiddos! It's that time again! What time you ask? Time to read something by moi! Have fun! J

Blaise Zabini was in the Slytherin common room about to go up to the dorm and go to bed when he saw something very interesting on the floor. He picked up the interesting item, which happened to be a book, and read the title : Draco Malfoy's Guide of Seduction.

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me," he said rolling his eyes. "Is he serious?"

He decided to stay down in the common room for a while and do some reading. It was already pretty late, so the common room was empty. He picked out a nice cushy chair and sat down to read.

He flipped open the book to the introduction, "So you want to be a master of seduction? Well then, this is the book for you! I have compiled a list of steps to seduce anyone. So go on, start reading! I'd say good luck, but with these steps you won't need it. You have the guarantee of the Slytherin Sex Genius."

"Oh he must be joking!" said Blaise.

He decided he might as well look at the list...just to see how crazy his best mate was. "Alright," he mumbled to himself. "Step one : read this book. Step two : follow the instructions. Step three : pick a girl (or guy, whatever floats your boat). Step four : Use the Malfoy charm to get them in bed. Oh wait, you don't have the Malfoy charm! Haha! You have to skip step four! Well you're probably out of luck, but feel free to keep reading. Step five :Er...give me a minute. I've never had to do anything else...Oh! I've got it. Compliment the person. Yeah, that should work... Step six : I don't know...try to get to know them? Step seven : Erm, buy them something. Step eight : Be nice. Or mean. Depends on the person, really. I guess you should find out what kind of person they're into first. Step nine : Go on a date with them. And step ten : Do them! The end. The story is over. You should be able to figure this part out on your own. If not, you need help that I can't give."

"What the hell is wrong with him?" laughed Blaise. "Why would he write this?"

"Why would who write what?" asked Draco, who just walked in the room.

"Why would YOU write THIS?" Blaise said, holding up the book.

"Where did you get that?"

"It was on the floor..."

"Did you read it?"

"Yeah. Er..."Slytherin Sex Genius"?"

"It's what people call me, okay?"

"What people?"

"Oh shut it."

"Do you actually think people would believe this?" Blaise asked incredulously.

"Of course, it's fool-proof."

"Prove it, fool," smirked Blaise. "If you can prove to me that these steps work, on a girl of my choice, then I'll...err...pay you...a lot."

"Please. I don't want your money. I'm richer than you could ever imagine. WHEN I prove to you that my steps work, you will be my slave for a month, doing ANYTHING I want."

"Fine. But when I win, you become MY slave for TWO months."

"Deal! Now who's the lucky lady who gets to experience the Malfoy charm?" Draco asked looking very confident.

Blaise thought for a few moments, trying to decide who would be the most horrible (and therefore, entertaining) candidate. "I've got it!" he shouted. "You, my friend, have to seduce...Granger!"

"Granger?" Draco squeaked. "Er...Granger who?"

"Oh no no no. Not Granger who - WHO GRANGER!"

"No way! Deal's off. There is no way in hell that I'm seducing that Mudblood freak!"

"I'm afraid it doesn't work that way, mate. You have one week."

"WHAT? You expect me to seduce Granger in ONE WEEK? That'll never work! I'd need like...a century!"

"Why, Draco, you aren't doubting your fool-proof steps, are you?"

"Never! My steps always work! Slytherin Sex Genius guaranteed! Challenge accepted, Zabini, challenge accepted. I WILL seduce Granger in one week. Pft, I'll seduce her in LESS than a week! You'll see. You'll ALL see!" Draco yelled.

"Er mate...I'm the only one here..."

"...I knew that."

"Well, I'm off to bed. The bet starts tomorrow at breakfast. Sweet dreams, Drakey!" Blaise winked, before going up the stairs to the boys' dorm.

"Bastard," Draco growled.