I don't own anything from Glee.

Rachel Berry had never been one for tradition.

She always went up and above everyone's expectations. Some people called her a perfectionist, some said she had OCD. But she knew that she was simply a girl with high standards. Very high standards. It's the reason why she kept a clean hygiene, why she was well educated and why she believed her body was was her temple. So that's why it made no sense for her to be drunk, singing Streisand at the top of her lungs and speeding down the road in Noah's truck. But if you look past Rachel's flawless profile you'd see that she needed this. An escape.

Why she needed to escape?

Well if losing Regionals to your ex-boyfriend, who dumped you and broke your heart wasn't enough. Try being rejected by your estranged mother and believing you were the reason that glee club was going to end also. So yes, Rachel had a reason to want to get drunk and have a little fun. And going to the annual Regional party and seeing the two people she thought would be in her life for a long time would be hard too. A little liquid courage was all she needed. She decided that Noah was a good person to help her during her predicament, and also Finn, whom she kindly let down, telling him she didn't think they could be together. But who would be the last person to join their little group of misfits. Santana was the only person Rachel could think of. She was a very good choice though, because the girl could really hold her liquor down.

After a sharing a bottle of vodka, a six-pack of beer and half a bottle of Jack Daniels, Santana's words didn't slur and she didn't mumble. Noah sat in the back, he was deep in thought with a hilarious confused look on his face. Trying to concentrate on remembering something, but every time he got close to it slipped through his mind. Finn sat next to him, clutching his seat-belt strap like it was a lifesaver. And Rachel was half way out the window, singing and singing her lungs out.

'Manhands.' Santana called out to Rachel, but she didn't respond. That crazy bitch is going to get us pulled over, she thought furiously. 'Rachel! Get your ass in the car!' Santana yelled angrily. Rachel slunk back into the car and huffed when Santana told her to put her seat-belt on. Rachel felt free and alive. Like she was floating, even though her stomach burned like crazy. It felt like she swallowed fire. But Noah told her that's how it would feel, and Rachel was ready to take that chance. It was silent for a few seconds. Rachel didn't like it. She shoved a bottle in front of Santana's face and she drank from it eagerly. Everything remained silent though, aside from the loud gulps Rachel took from her can of beer.

This is the life. Rachel thought in her mind. She liked this side of life. The 'dark' side. The side full of recklessness, and irresponsibility. Mindless, wild, fun...that's all Rachel wanted. And if it felt like this she was going to be doing this a lot.

'FUCK! Now I remember!' Puck screamed out, breaking the deep silence, his voice absolutely excited.

'What the hell Puckerman!' Finn yelled out. 'You scared the shit out me.'

'Do it again Puck, do it again and I'll drop your ass off at the nearest bus stop.' Santana told him in a warning tone.

'Hey woman, it's my car. Besides look what I've got.' Puck reached under his seat and pulled out a long blue bottle.

'What's that?' Rachel asked snapping off her seat belt and peeking over at Puck.

'This Rachel...This is tequila.' He said with a happy grin on his face.

'Oooh pass is here.' Santana said fervently. Santana took a quick swig before she passed it back to Puck. 'Hell yeah.' She said with a sudden thrill in her voice.

Finn took a longer swallow and Puck took an even longer one. They both shook their heads like they had just woken up and were in a daze.

'Here Berry.' Puck said, handing her the bottle. Rachel took it in her hand and drank slowly. It burned her throat again and it fed the flame in her stomach. But she got used it it. Besides it deepened the high she was on and made everything blurry and smudged. 'I love tequila.' Rachel said in a dreamy voice, she hiccuped loudly and sat back in her seat.

'Of course you do.' Santana said giggling, she took the bottle back and turned on the radio, beginning to bob her head to the rock music pouring out loudly over the speakers.

'Too bad we don't got any...any...whatchamacallit.' Finn said drowsily. 'Lemon and salt.' He finally said.

Puck nodded and Rachel sunk down in her seat. Loving the way her eyes hurt along with her head. Everything spun around, it was hard to concentrate.

...Mirror queen, mannequin, rhythm of love.

Puck began to sing, playing an imaginary guitar.

Sweet dream, saccharine, loosen up.

Finn joined in pretending there was a drum set in front of him.

You gotta squeeze a little, squeeze a little
Tease a little more
Easy operator come a knockin' on my door
Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet
Little miss innocent sugar me, yeah

Take a bottle, shake it up
Break the bubble, break it up.

Soon enough Santana and Rachel joined the two boys, singing as wildly as they were.

Pour some sugar on me
Ooh, in the name of love
Pour some sugar on me
C'mon fire me up
Pour your sugar on me
Oh, I can't get enough

I'm hot, sticky sweet
From my head to my feet, yeah

Santana and Rachel shook their head frantically, while Puck and Finn attacked the seats in front of them. Rachel bounced up and down and Santana honk the horn rapidly, keeping up with the rhythm of the song playing.

'I love this song!' Finn yelled out the window, frightening two elderly women in the process.

'Me too!' Rachel screamed at him.

'Yeah!' He yelled.

'Fuck yeah!' Rachel yelled back. Surprising herself because she never cursed, only once and the word was damn.

'Fuck yeah!' Puck shouted.

'Fuck yeah!' Santana hollered.

They all looked at each other quickly and smiled widely at each other. Rachel clenched her tiny hands into fists and shut her eye lids tightly.

'Three, two, one...' She heard Finn count down.

'FUCK YEAH!' They all howled out at the top of their lungs. They burst out in a fit of laughter afterwords. Rachel crawled into the back seat with Puck and Finn and wrapped an arm around both of their necks. She held them tightly and felt tears well up in her eyes. They had done so much for her. She didn't know how to thank them.

'Guys-Guys I love you so much. You have no idea what you guys mean to me.' Rachel began to choke up. 'I love you guys. I love you guys, do you understand me.' She shook them madly. 'I. Love. You. Guys. You're the best, you've done so much for me. Like right now. Right now is the happiest I've been in a long time.' Rachel began to cry and she forgot what she was going to say next. 'I love you guys.' It sounded like a jumble of words.

Rachel let go of the petrified boys, who stayed as frozen as a rock, and she began bawl out.

'Rachel! Shut the fuck up!' Santana snapped at her. 'All they did was get you drunk, calm down.'

'Berry, why are y-you crying?' Puck asked her blinking rapidly. Rachel shrugged, because she honestly didn't know why she was crying. She simply felt very emotional suddenly. 'Okay well I hope you don't get mad but...that was the most funniest shit I've seen since...ever.' He began to laugh and Finn and Santana joined in as well. But Rachel didn't find it amusing, she felt her face go hot. And all she saw was red.

'Shut up!' She yelled. But everyone just kept laughing. She yawned and sat back. 'S'not funny.' She whispered tiredly.

Santana pulled into the parking lot for the Regionals party. She looked in the mirror and saw that the three teenagers in the back didn't look so well. Puck looked red, Finn looked pale and Rachel looked green. Santana sighed, she felt a bit sick herself. And she was more than just tipsy. She was drunk. But the three of them, they were plastered. Santana parked and rolled the windows up. Taking a deep breath she reapplied her makeup and turned around to do the same to a dozing Rachel. Reaching into her bag hastily she look for her body spray, it took her a while, and she kept cursing at the perfume. When she finally found it, she sprayed all four of them down. She didn't care if Puck and Finn smelled like girls. She looked at Finn longingly before Puck broke her trance.

"What the hell?' He fumed.

'Get out idiots.' She smacked Puck and Finn.

'Hold up woman.' Puck snapped at her, before he and Finn began to laugh. Santana rolled her eyes and gently nudged Rachel. She wouldn't move so she slapped her across the face.

'Huh?' Rachel open her eyes widely and looked around.

'Come on, Rachel get out.' Santana told her a bit harshly, but whenever she drank she got a tad bit more angry than usual. Rachel crawled out and placed one foot out and then another. But when her feet touched the floor she looked around and suddenly she was falling. She fell down to the floor and landed on her butt.

'Ow.' She squeaked out.

Puck and Finn began to laugh and Santana hit them both on the shoulder. 'You could help her up.'

'Eh.' Puck shrugged, Finn rolled his eyes and went to help Rachel up. 'Fuck. We should've gotten some coffee before we came.' He hissed out.

'Oh well. Too bad, we're gonna have to live with it.' Santana said leaning up against the truck.

Rachel didn't think she could deal with it though, she suddenly became extremely woozy and felt like she had been punched in the gut. 'Ugh! I don't feel so good. Why is everything spinning?' She asked them.

'Yeah your not going to feel good, and everything is going to keep spinning. And it's going to look like there's two of everything. So get a hold of yourself and try not to make it to obvious that your totally wasted.' She walked up to Rachel and linked her arm with hers. 'Lean in me if you have to. And if you feel like your gonna say something stupid, don't say anything at all. Got it?' She said, quickly looking at Rachel. They began to walk toward the entrance.

'Yeah.' Rachel said uncertain of herself.

They all took a deep breath before they walked through the double doors. As they made their way inside, Puck, Finn and Santana looked around at the people surrounding them. Santana kept her sexy vixen face on, Puck sent smoldering looks out to everyone, and Finn kept winking and giving thumbs up and cheesy smiles to everyone. Puck slapped his arm, 'Dude, not cool.'

Meanwhile, Rachel kept her eyes glued to the spinning floor.

'Guys! Where have you been?' Rachel heard Mercedes ask loudly.

'Out.' Puck said curtly.

'Okay, out where? Be more specific.' She said getting angry.

'Out...side.' Finn told her seriously.

Rachel let a hysterical giggle escape her lips and the four of them began to laugh.

'Whats wrong with you guys?' Kurt asked confused. Suddenly a stench reached his nostrils. He realized it was coming from the four of them. He leaned in and inhaled deeply, it smelled so horrible it sent him into a fit of coughs. 'Why do you guys smell like flowers and alcohol?'

Before anybody could respond. Mr. Shue walked up to them and smiled sympathetically. 'Why are you guys just standing here, come on, go socialize. Have fun! Just because we didn't place doesn't mean we can enjoy ourselves a bit.'

'No Mr. Shue, that's exactly what it means.' Artie told him sadly. Glee was ending and there was nothing they could do about it.

Mr. Shue was going to say something but he inhaled deeply and looked around. 'What's that smell?' He asked disgusted.

'Oh it's my new cologne, it's called "Flowers".' Puck told him with a straight face. Will nodded, not understanding, but nevertheless he nodded.

'And alcohol.' Rachel said softly, before she clamped her mouth shut and began to laugh. Santana nudged her but joined in. Puck and Finn also began to laugh and Will finally understood what was going on, and what the smell was.

'Have you guys been drinking?' He asked quietly.

The laughter stopped and Santana pulled Rachel away. 'Sorry Mr. Shue, you've got to go.' She pulled Puck and Finn along with her also.

'Rachel! What was that?' Santana scolded her.

'I'm sorry. I couldn't help it.' She whined.

Puck and Finn weren't even listening though, because they heard the beginning notes to one of the greatest songs ever written. They clapped and dragged the two girls to the dance floor. Puck grasped Rachel's hand and turned her rapidly. The movement made her stomach heave but she smiled nervously. A song began to play that immediately reminded her of the song they sang in the car. She looked quickly over at Santana who looked back at her mischievously.

'Now's your chance to make him jealous.' Puck told Rachel quietly.

Rachel smiled in delight, she was going to dance her ass off.

She was a fast machine,
She kept her motor clean,
She was the fastest damn woman that I ever seen

She had sightless eyes,
Telling me no lies,
Knockin' me out with those American thighs,

Taking more than her share,
Had me fighting for air,
She told me to come, but I was already there,

'Cause the walls started shaking,
The earth was quaking,
My mind was achin',
And we were makin' it and you...

Shook me all night long,
Yeah you, shook me all night long.

Working double time on the seduction line,
She was one of a kind,
She's just mine all mine,

Wanted no applause,
It's just another cause,
Made a meal out of me, and come back for more,

Had to cool me down,
To take another round,
Now I'm back in the ring to take another swing

But the walls were shaking,
The earth was quaking,
My mind was aching,
And we were making it and you...

Shook me all night long,
Yeah you, shook me all night long,
Knocked me out, I said you
Shook me all night long,
Had me shaking and you,
Shook me all night long,
Well you shook me,
Well you shook me...

You really shook me and you!
Shook me all night long,
You...
Shook me all night long,
Yeah yeah you,
Shook me all night long,
You really got me and you,
Shook me all night long,
Yeah you shook me,
Yeah you shook me,
All night long.

When the song finally ended, Rachel didn't know how they ended up in the position they were in, but she liked the position Finn and Santana were in. They were kissing each other sweetly and gently, Rachel was happy that they found love. But when she looked around she saw that Jesse wasn't even looking her way, instead other men and boys were looking at her hungrily. Puck released her leg from around his waist and set her down to the floor. Everyone began to clap and Puck took a little bow, exaggerating the moment.

Rachel would have loved to bask in the limelight, but drunk Rachel's emotions were in a disarray. She felt conflicted, angry and hurt. She blinked back the tears that were threatening to form and walked off the dance floor, with Puck, Santana and Finn on her heel. The glee club gave them all a round of compliments for their little dance number, but Rachel didn't seem to understand what they were saying.

He wasn't even looking.

That was the only thing that rang through her mind. Jesse didn't even care. She doubted that he ever did. If he loved her, he would have ran up to Puck and knocked him out for touching his girl. If he cared for her, he would have stared at her with hurt fulled eyes. Because they had won. Vocal Adrenaline beat them, Jesse had his prize and his moment of glory. What was keeping them apart now? How could he not want her, she wanted him. Rachel yearned for him. But he didn't understand. He would never understand.

'I didn't know you had it in you.' Kurt told Rachel in a friendly tone, the nicest tone he had ever spoken to her with.

But Rachel didn't respond, instead she ran up on stage and took the microphone into her hands.

'Hello? Can you all hear me?' Rachel asked the crowd of people who were now looking up at her.

'Yes.' Puck yelled to her. Rachel tried keep a straight face, even though he said nothing funny.

'Well um hello. My name is Rachel Berry. Co-captain of New Directions.' Everyone began to clap. Rachel waited impatiently for them to finish. 'Yes. Thank you. I have have something to say. And I have a specific person to say it to. Jesse St. James?' Rachel found his face in the forming crowd. Meanwhile, Santana who was holding onto Finn's hand, murmured and 'Oh no" softly. But Rachel didn't hear her, or even see her. All she saw was Jesse, he looked at her with a strange emotion in his eyes and waited for Rachel to continue. 'Hi.' She finally said. A few people laughed. Rachel took a deep breath, and waited until she knew what she was going to say so she could say it. Here it goes. She thought a bit nervously.

'When you first came into my life. I thought I found someone who really understood me. A person who shared my dreams, and my taste in music and art. I thought that you were the most perfect person in the world. And now I've come to realize that you're not that person, you are completely different from that. You're perfection in my eyes. Not to everyone else, but I don't care what they think. And you shouldn't have cared either...I miss you. I miss singing with you. I miss talking to you. I don't understand why you lied to me. I don't understand why you hurt me the way that you did. Because if you were anything like me, you wouldn't have broken my heart so viciously and bitterly. And now I think I'm a complete moron and imbecile, because I don't care that you crushed me.' Rachel laughed darkly and lowered her voice to a sad whisper.

'And that's so stupid. Because I should hate you. I should want to key your car and slash your tires. I should want you to feel the way I feel right now.' Rachel began to cry, the tears that pooled up in her eyes streamed down. Jesse looked up at her remorsefully and regretfully. 'But I can't, because I-I...' Rachel didn't know how to say it so she looked down at the floor and cried in silence. 'I care for you too much. But you don't feel the same way. You never will. Because of your family, your so called friends, and your dreams. Its so heartbreaking, that I gave up all of those things to be with you, and you can't do the same. You never loved me.' Her voice broke and she closed her eyes tightly. After a moment of complete silence she opened her mouth to speak again.

'I love you Jesse St. James.' She said slowly and painfully, before she ran off the stage and through the back door. The rest of the glee club ran after her, glaring at Jesse on the way out.

Rachel open up her heart to someone. She had shown someone what she was feeling. She never felt so vulnerable in her life. She stepped outside and leaned over, crying out in loud sobs. Santana walked up to her and pulled her into a tight hug. Tears streaming down her face as well because of Rachel's confession to Jesse. Everyone stepped in and held Rachel in their arms rocking her back and forth gently. Rachel closed her eyes and felt safe and contained with them.

But Jesse, who was still inside, too dumbstruck to move, didn't feel so contained. His eyes began to burn before he pinched the bridge of his nose and went to get a bottle of water. He really did hurt her, more than he ever planned. And he never planned on hurting her, because he never planned on planning in love with her. All he had to do was lead her to Shelby. That's it, just let Rachel into Shelby's life, not let her into his heart. He sat at the Vocal Adrenaline table and buried his head in his hands, Rachel didn't understand the way he felt. She thought everything was a lie. Jesse knew that it wasn't though, he knew how he felt.

Jesse heard a chair slide beside him. 'You really love her don't you?' He heard Shelby ask.

He uncovered his face and nodded. 'Yeah. I really do.'

Shelby smiled, 'Then why did you come back? You could have stayed, you could have been with her. You still had UCLA, I mean we had a deal, right?'

'Yeah we did, but...' He trailed off, not really understanding why he didn't stay with Rachel.

'But what?' She asked.

'But I got scared, I was so afraid. I mean I never felt that before, what I felt with Rachel. It was like fire but it felt like it was uncontrollable, I just didn't know what to do. That's why I left. But I didn't want her to think I never loved her!' He raised his hands up in the air exasperated.

Shelby nodded and sighed. 'Scared? Afraid? Wow Jesse, I thought I taught you better then that.' She smiled at him. 'Love is like the stage, it's exhilarating yet frightening. But if you know how to be yourself, it comes like a second nature. Come on. Your Jesse St. James for crying out loud.' She told him animatedly. 'You always go for what you want. And what is it that you want now?'

Jesse looked at Shelby, his friend, mentor, teacher and idol. 'I want Rachel.' He said out loud and suddenly it made perfect sense to him. He wanted Rachel, more that he wanted fame or fortune. More than his dreams, he wanted Rachel. He wanted love.

'Well go get her.' Shelby said softly.

Jesse smiled, 'No not yet. I have to find a way to show her how much I want her. How much I need her.'

'Good boy.' Shelby told him, truly proud of him. 'Well go on. Go think of a way to get her back.' She commanded, motioning with her head for him to leave.

'Yeah. Okay, I'm going.' Jesse stood up and walked towards the door. But he turned on his heal and went back to hug Shelby.

'Thank you...for everything.' He told her gratefully. Because he really was grateful, she gave him the lead in glee, she gave him a free ride to college, she helped him become a star, she lead him to her daughter and towards love. She gave him a lot and he was thankful.

'You're welcome.' She said, hugging him back. Shelby watched as he left through the doors knowing that she had helped in giving Rachel, her daughter, the love she could never give her. The love she deserved and wanted.

Please review. Thanks.