I'm sorry.

I was about to update with an actual chapter, but the current chapter was getting too hard to write. So then I took a break from writing altogether and did other things. Like trying to translate a whole entire song from Chinese to English. (Which, by the way, I could not fully complete because my "Chinese Phrases and Idioms" dictionary didn't include poetic terms, and my mom could not translate those phrases either.) And finally watching Hetalia. (Don't kill me. I was too lazy to.) Then, I tried writing again, gave up, and decided to use that chapter later, and write this as an omake. Then, it somehow escalated to this length, and turned into a multi-omake.

Rima looked up from her terribly boring textbook.

She didn't know why, and she didn't question it either. But she lifted her head up and looked around the familiar scene of her backyard.

It was a dull backyard. Grass that grew to a fairly uniform length, insects flitting and crawling around, an extremely irritating Narrator sitting just out of sight, describing the ordinary scene which Rima felt compelled to look at. Oh, and there was also an enormous tree which she just happened to be sitting against.

…..

Since when did she have a tree in her backyard? And since when did she have a backyard at all? And how is it possible to even have a backyard in this huge, cramped city?

Puzzled, Rima and her usual disinterested face searched her memories for any event that may have caused a backyard to materialize exactly where she remembered her psychotic neighbor (and English teacher's) house was.

Well, I don't remember it, but it would have been nice if a bulldozer came and tore Kurosaki-sensei's house down. It would be even better if they had accidentally killed her in the process as well.

She reasoned that this must have been why she felt compelled to look up, and went back to memorizing the names and dates of the wars the U.S. has fought in, despite the fact that this was nowhere in the curriculum of a normal Japanese student.*

Until a few minutes later, when she suddenly felt the urge to look up yet again.

Oh, my, what shall I do? A giant, gaping black hole leading to an unknown place has just appeared in front of me. I guess I'm supposed to climb down and see where it leads to, right?

For strange reasons, the air seemed to nod. Because this terribly written chapter will also subtly shove the laws of lack-of-physics in your face, no further explanation will be required.

Too bad. I'm on vacation right now, so you guys can't force me into one of your dumb fanfictions, unless you've already typed a chapter, and are returning from a hiatus!

Rima went back to her book with a slight smirk, knowing that she had beat those fangirls this time.

That is, until an extremely strong wind just happened to come along, and, coincidentally, and start pushing her towards the hole.

Wait…you can't do this to me! I have an union contract! But, then again, this one hasn't been so bad. Idiotic Co-worker 1 still hasn't shown up yet, and it's been almost six hundred words. Well, since I was at least allowed to not complain about Crossdresser and work on my homework instead, I guess this isn't so bad. I guess I'll spend time in this fanfic until some fanatical author drags me into a "Rimahiko" for the 2,5793rd* time.

And so, with this thought, the petit blonde decided to walk to the large, gaping hole herself. The Narrator, though being in plain sight, was completely ignored as it followed Rima to the edge of the void.

Hmm…every time a large object just happened to materialize in a fic, it's turned into an extremely OOC story where I end up looking stupid. Then again, this one actually has a half-way decent narrator, so that's not likely.

As our heroine thought about what to do, the audience grew bored. Because a bored audience equals less reviews, the air started to panic, as if sensing the fear of the very author writing this tedious tale.

In fact, the air was in so much dramatic, angsty turmoil that it uprooted the big tree mentioned fifteen or so paragraphs ago, and caused it to fall towards the very spot Rima was standing in; in very slow motion, of course, for dramatic effect.

It was in these 7.029586 seconds that Rima decided to jump down the hole, with her elegant blond mop of hair billowing behind her, rather than to be crushed by a tree. The Narrator jumped as well, but because she was not the heroine, and because she did not have an elegant mop of blond hair, no further description was given.

As Rima (and the Narrator) fell, she (they) noticed a wide array of items surrounding them.

She (they) fell slowly enough to even list some of them.
First, there was a random shower of flowers. Sakura petals, roses, daisies- you get the idea.
Then, they passed through a thick layer of invincible bubbles that didn't move and didn't pop. They happened to be pink.
Afterwards, they entered a large cloud of sparkles.

Rima sneezed, and batted a few of them away. When that didn't work, she just tried to ignore them, and oddly enough, they left her alone. She remained this way for the next thirty seconds.

Then, larger, heavier, and considerably more solid objects replaced the harmless sparkles from before.

After about 30 seconds of dodging random props, a kitchen sink fell squarely on the Narrator's head, against all laws of physics, and rendered it unconscious. Because of this, no further description of their descent was given.

When they reached the bottom, Rima gracefully landed with a soft "thud."

The Narrator, who had woken just seconds before, was not so lucky, skilled, graceful, or elegant, and landed flat on its face. Luckily, the impact was not too heavy, so it remained conscious, and could continue the story.

Rima looked around. This place looked almost exactly like the interior of her house. In fact, if not for the stray sparkles that still flitted around her, she would have thought this to be a dream.

Maybe this really is a dream, and I'm still dreaming. If I fall asleep in a dream, would I actually wake up? Falling asleep would be too hard. I remember that getting into a near death situation wakes you up too. So I guess I should find somewhere to die. The fastest way would be to jump out of our second-floor window, if this is my house. I suppose it's worth a try.

With that thought, our delicate protagonist headed towards the staircase, the Narrator trailing behind her.

As she ascended the short flight of stairs, Rima thought about how suspiciously long the stairs seemed to be. When she made the final turn, a person swiftly landed before her.

A beautiful girl with ankle-length, raven black hair, stunning brown orbs that seemed to pierce through Rima's very soul, and a tattoo of the roman numeral for thirteen located right below her collarbone, pointed her gun, ornately engraved with the roman numeral thirteen as well, at our petite heroine. Her black, diamond-studded miniskirt rustled in perfect, synchronized movements with her black, half-length leather jacket.

"I am the Black Kitten, and I'm here to bring bad luck," the mysterious girl announced.

"Kitten? Cat would be so much more threatening. 'Black Kitten' sounds quite stupid." Rima stated.

The girl sighed dramatically. "Well, yeah, but that's already been taken. You see, my older brother was the previous No. XIII assassin, but then he quit and I took his job. He was called the Black Cat, and since I'm just as good as him, but three years younger, they call me the Black Kitten," she explained, in a rather matter-of-factly way. "Anyways, that aside, I've been sent to kill you, and so it's been nice talking to you and all that. Nobody really bothers to ask about me." She interrupted her rather long speech by sighing dramatically yet again. "So, prepare to die or whatever."

She pointed her gun at Rima again, with no regard to the Narrator, but just before she could pull the trigger, another girl appeared and fly-tackle-hug-tackled the first, her brown pigtails flying.

"No!" she yelled, as the obviously-prettier-looking one disappeared in a puff of smoke, causing the brunette to fall to the ground with enough force to induce a coma. Unsurprisingly, she managed to stand up again.

"Phew, that was close! That girl had the Instant-Death-Bullet-Shooting-Gun-Shooting Alice*! If she had shot at you, you would have died, even if it didn't hit you! There are a lot of scary people in this place, but my Nullifying Alice seems to work on all of them. They just disappear in a puff of smoke if I touch them, which is really weird. And by the way, I'm Mikan Sakura. Who are you?"

While all of that was being said, our heroine simply stood there, eyes glazed. When she finally realized that a question had been asked, she answered, "Speak more slowly. That would make you sound less annoying." The Narrator subtly nodded its/her head, although nobody noticed.

To Rima's surprise, the other girl, Mikan, was not offended. "My friend Hotaru tells me that all the time! We've best friends for a while now. I was in her lab, and I think I touched something I wasn't supposed to. Then, 'poof!' I appeared in this place. I think I might be lost. If my friends were here, I wouldn't be worried, because they're really reliable. But Hotaru was the only other person there, and I was just reaching for a box of Howalon that I saw sitting on a shelf! Maybe Hotaru bought them for Thanksgiving. Or maybe it could have been for a birthday party. Ooh, birthday parties are really fun! But anyways, then I think I accidentally hit something with my hand, and now I'm here with nobody to help me! And I don't know the way out. Do you know where I should go?" These questions were all entirely directed at Rima, with our Narrator being ignored.

This time, Rima had learned her lesson and tried to make sense of Mikan's frantic babbling. For a moment, she considered lying. Then, she remembered the presence of a Narrator, which signify the forces of a Story. And in a Story, those that perform a good deed always get rewardedin the end. Always.

I guess that since this is a Story, and because someone who needs help magically appeared out of nowhere, the only way I'll be able to get out of this stupid place is by helping this person.

She sighed, beginning to regret going on vacation after all.

"Yes, this is my house. Go down the stairs, then take the corridor going right. The last door on the left should lead you out." She said.

Mikan smiled. "Thanks! Now bye!" She waved and ran off.

Somehow, Rima knew it couldn't have ended right then. She sat down on the steps, tired from the day's events.

She really missed her gag manga.

Sure enough, within a few minutes, Mikan had returned.

"Ah, sorry to bother you again, but I got lost! I forgot your directions. Could you show me the way out?"

Rima sighed again. She couldn't help but think of Yaya, who, now that she thought about it, looked almost exactly like Mikan. There was just this one little thing that seemed a bit odd…

She dismissed these thoughts, and answered, "Sure," with yet another sigh.

She delicately walked down the familiar route to the exit, like it was any other day when she had to go to work/school/Tortureland and get glomped by Yaya. Minus Kusukusu. But then again, nobody really bothered to remember the charas, so she wan't that surprised.

The Narrator stumbled down the steps, tripped, and fell on its face. It sighed, wishing for at least one comment of concern.

"There. Enjoy yourself and don't get killed." Our petite heroine deadpanned.

"But don't you want to leave too?" asked Mikan

"Why would I?"

"Don't you know?" Mikan's most-likely standard cheerful expression quickly changed into a slightly sinister smile. "This place is called Crossoverland. It's exactly like a story, except for one thing." She paused. Rima took this as her cue to ask the dreaded question.

"What's different?"

"We're not in our own worlds anymore. We'll also be trapped here for the rest of eternity until we escape. And you'll need the help of several other worlds to get out. So, need help?" She extended out her hand, with a happy smile pasted on her face again. "I'm Sakura Mikan of Gakuen Alice. And you are?"

Rima reached forward and shook Mikan's hand. The words flowing to her mouth before she could think about it, "Mashiro Rima of Shugo Chara. Since you're the first person I've really spoken to here, I guess you're the other main character?"

"Yup!" She grinned even more, defying half of the already defied laws of gravity that Rima knew of. "Now, let's go!" She opened the door.

The scene was one of the most horrible that Rima had ever seen.

Everything was dyed neon colors, pink being the most noticeable. Slimy goo began to seep through her shoes.

Mikan laughed nervously. "Oh, and did I mention that you need to get to a safe place in less than five hundred words? If you don't, you'll disappear."

Rima sighed. She almost even wished for a Rimahiko.

Almost.

*This is not proven. It may be, but I find it highly unlikely, so I'm keeping it there.

*The exact number is unknown. I'm too lazy to actually think of a reasonable method to find the actual amount, so I just randomly typed something.

*To help you read this, I'll group the words together: {[(Instant Death) Bullet] Shooting} Gun Shooting Alice. Basically, it's an Alice that allows the user to use a gun that shoots bullets that cause instant death. Reading back, I don't quite understand it either.

This is just a sort of omake chapter/storyline. If you guys like it, I'll occasionally post this story instead of the main. Thank you for reading!