Nobody Knows – Pink
A/N: The memoirs of Mrs. Weasley. Set during the summer between PS and CoS. It made sense to me at 2:30 am...here's to hoping it makes sense to you.
Disclaimer: Not mine. I wish.
She could have been a ghost, for all anyone knew. She hadn't been outside her room in days. No-one knew if she was dead or alive. The only indication was her screaming at night: crying, begging, pleading, blood-curdling screams that were obviously the stuff of nightmares. When the screaming stopped at some point in the night, they knew she was awake, and the crying would be unbearable. It sounded helpless and terrified.
She usually prided herself on not being scared of or by anything. She always said crying was for ladies, and she had no intention of being a lady if one of her brothers wouldn't join her.
But now, none of them would begrudge her these tears. Naturally, they wanted to rush in and help her, but this was all about building independence, and she couldn't build independence if someone was always coming in to save her. This had been a wake-up call for her, but im the most terrifying and gruesome way possible. They didn't think she would ever be the same again.
And they were right.
Somewhere inside her soul was a tainted darkness. It was small, and it wouldn't grow, but it's presence was doing things to her already. The only way it would vanish would be for him to vanish, and no-one knew how soon that would happen.
Nobody knows, nobody knows but me
That sometimes, I cry
I could pretend that I'm sleep
When my tears start to fall, I peek out from behind these walls –
But I think nobody knows. Nobody knows
Nobody likes, nobody likes to lose
Their inner voice
The one I used to hear
Before my life made a choice
But I think nobody knows. Nobody knows
She liked to think that she was invincible, and in some ways, she was. When her daughter was younger, she had frequently told her brothers off for hurting her. So if her brothers couldn't hurt her, surely nothing else could. But as she grew older, this protection came at a price: you must be a proper lady, she had insisted. You can't stay safe from them and not use it to your advantage.
She had, of course, been treated like the rest of her brothers from that moment onwards.
But she wasn't the only one who was tainted. Somewhere, far away from where she lay crying, another child was facing the after shock.
Baby, oh your secret's safe with me
There's nowhere else in the world that I could ever be
And baby, don't it feel like I'm alone?
Who's gonna be there when the last angel has flown
And I've lost my way back home?
I think nobody knows. Nobody knows
They both knew they had cheated death that day, thank Merlin. SHE would not have allowed either of them to die. They needed permission to do things like that at their age...no, it was unthinkable. Unimaginable.
Somewhere upstairs, something smashed, and she sighed. Her daughter was, once again, kicking in her sleep. Her voice cried out again in earnest, pleading like never before and screaming the whole time. Please stop, PLEASE, I don't want to anymore, don't hurt me, PLEASE –
She sighed again. Her daughter had won that day, but at a heavy price. She would most probably never be able to confide in anyone the same way, or trust parchment for the rest of her life.
Nobody cares
It's win or lose, not how you play the game
And the realm to darkness always has a way of always knowing my name
But I think nobody knows. Nobody knows.
Baby, oh your secret's safe with me
There's nowhere else in the world that I could ever be
And baby, don't it feel like I'm alone?
Who's gonna be there when the last angel has flown
And I've lost my way back home?
I know no-one, no-one, nobody knows
She wished feverishly that there was something she could do. She liked spoiling her children, and she would always see them as little 10-year-olds, but her daughter was something else. She herself had shied away from her brothers teasing and 'affections', and her daughter was no different. She too had been the only girl and youngest of her family, and she would always have a soft spot for her little girl.
Oh no, no, no, no, no
Tomorrow, I'll be there, my friend
I'll wake up and start all over again
When everybody else is gone
Oh, no, no
Somewhere above her, a girl was weeping to herself, crying with all her heart, wishing she could take back so many things. She rolled over, sniffed, and continued crying herself to sleep.
Nobody knows, nobody knows the rhythm on my heart
The way I do when I'm lying in the dark
And the world is asleep.
But I think nobody knows. Nobody knows. Nobody knows but me. Me.