This is my first time writing Ruby/Pearl. In reality, this is my first Pokemon fic EVER, so please be kind. It may be a little OOC at parts, but I'm working on it.

Yes, I know how strange this pairing is, there isn't even an official shipping name, but I submitted one anyway in hopes it might become official. "Official" meaning, of course, appearing on Bulbapedia's Incomplete List :D It's Misnomershipping, btw. That's what I've decided to call it, since both Ruby and Pearl are boys with actual girl names.

I must ask that no one bash this shipping, since I created it just for fun (and wrote this fic just for fun). Crack shipping, yup. Though this fic wasn't written with crack specifically in mind lol. So let's see how these two hotheads work together, shall we?

SO WHATEVS. I'll just quit rambling and get on with the story. Chapter one barely has any shipping action in it, so sorry about the slow-ish start.

Pearl didn't want to wake up. His head felt disgusting, like some bad massage therapist was squeezing it out of existence. His entire body felt like it was aching while he lay under the comforter, which was sprawled across the bed in its usual disorganized fashion. It was all Pearl could do to lift a finger without the dull pain annoying him. After a few slow minutes, he forced himself up for some ibuprofen, maybe even some food; he couldn't tell if his stomach was sore or ready to growl.

That's when he realized his comforter felt a little heavier and his bed a little firmer than usual. Maybe that was why his back hurt, he thought. He scratched his blond head and reached out to the left for his scarf, searching for the familiar soiled lime green that he wore 24/7 like a security blanket.

Pearl's amber eyes widened in shock as he looked at his own bare arm, then past that, where no lime green scarf existed, just a space and a blank wall. He shot up, disturbing the slumbering Pokemon on the bed, causing it to mew in protest. Pearl shied away from the foreign Delcatty. Something was wrong. Everything was wrong. He was in someone else's room, someone else's bed, wearing someone else' nicely pressed pajama bottoms.

He slid out of bed and had a look around. It was a balmy morning: the windows were shut, the white lacy curtains were drawn, soft light reflected off the white walls. On a nearby chair, he found his usual clothing: his brown pants, bright orange-and-white striped shirt, and familiar lime green scarf, still worn-looking but sparkling and freshly-washed. Everything was neatly folded. This was definitely not his own room. His clothes were usually stuffed haphazardly in his dresser, sleeves in disarray, underwear not quite squeezing in. His room was the exact opposite of the meticulous setup of the room he was in now. After glancing around, he quickly dressed. His clothes smelled differently; it made him uncomfortable. Pearl was used to being thrust into uncomfortable situations, but nothing quite like this had happened to him before. He decided to push through it, as he had always done. He'd make some sense out of this. He would.

Suddenly he heard voices from downstairs. A male's voice, not very deep but not girly, wafted up from the first floor. Swallowing his nervousness, Pearl ventured down the flight of stairs. He heard a small thump and found the Delcatty from before by his side. He stared at the Pokemon for a bit and took in its soft, shining fur, its fluffy ears, and its gorgeous mane. Delcatty were rare in Sinnoh; Pearl still vaguely remembered the day when a swarm of Skitty and Delcatty raided the path to Sunyshore. It was all over the news.

The first thing that hit Pearl downstairs was the lovely smell of breakfast. He followed the smell until he saw a small table with two people, one woman and one boy, sitting opposite each other, chatting over their plates of sausages and eggs. A boy with thin cat's eye glasses glanced up at the sight of Pearl's loud outfit. The Delcatty happily jumped over to the boy; he reached down and stroked its head while it purred happily, then looked back up at Pearl with striking ruby red gems, whose piercing quality was visible even past the rims of those glasses.

"So the thing is awake."

Pearl wasn't used to being insulted so early in the morning. He could sense the blood rush to his face and his jaw tighten at the smug look on the boy's face, but he wasn't quite in the mood to blow up at the other boy. Yet. Inhale deeply, he told himself. He pictured Diamond and Lady Berlitz, how they had been waiting for him, how he needed to hurry to their meeting place. He immediately calmed down.

"Good morning, dear." It was the lady's turn to speak. She had a bright smile and an almost innocent look about her. "Help yourself to breakfast. The plates and food are right by the stove."

Pearl skipped the formalities and went straight toward the wonderful smell at the stove.

"Your friend doesn't talk much, does he?" the woman said to the boy.

"Oh please, mother, my friends don't have terrible fashion sense."

Pearl's brow furrowed. Diamond, Missy, Diamond, Missy. He finished loading his plate and returned to the table. He took a seat next to the boy's mother.

"Please excuse my son's bluntness," she said with a small blush. Pearl nodded and started to eat.

"I would like some appreciation for last night's generous stay." The boy adjusted his glasses and glanced at Pearl with his shining red eyes. Pearl's own amber ones burned.

"Tell me where I am," Pearl forced out. He was not about to lose to this red-eyed boy's unshaken calmness.

The boy's mother looked worried. "Ruby, you should explain to this boy what happened. I'm going into the bedroom to tidy up a little, okay dear?"

Pearl thought he saw the boy's composure flicker. "Very well," Ruby cleared his throat and set down his steaming cup of tea as his mother strolled away. "Firstly, I assume you are not from Hoenn. Your Pokemon are very strange and-"

Pearl instinctively grasped his side for his Pokeballs. Nothing was there. He panicked. "Where's my Pokemon?" he said desperately to Ruby.

Ruby looked more than slightly annoyed. "I was about to explain that. Your Pokemon are currently being healed at the laboratory here. I took them there myself. I also mended and changed your clothes, gave you my own bed to sleep in, and ordered Coco to watch over you for the night." Ruby narrowed his eyes at Pearl, as if to dare Pearl to be ungrateful.

Pearl gulped. Those red eyes creeped him out a little. "Okay, okay. Just… t-tell me what happened."

"An acquaintance of mine –remember to thank her later- found you in the forest near Petalburg and flew you over here on her Tropius. She told me a wild Slaking had found you."

The look on Pearl's face told Ruby he was confused. Ruby continued, "Have you never encountered a Slaking before? This is the Hoenn region. Slaking are fairly common."

"You mean I'm… NOT in Sinnoh?" Pearl's face twisted into confusion, amazement, grave concern. "Missy and Diamond are waiting for me! I have to get back!" He jumped out of his seat, dishes clattering, startling both Ruby and his mother. He hurried blindly for the door.

Something caught his pant leg, and, in forward momentum, Pearl fell to the floor. Whipping his head around savagely, he bared his teeth at the Ruby boy's Delcatty. The Pokemon looked about as unfazed as its trainer, who was standing above Pearl, looking at the fallen boy condescendingly.

"You shouldn't inflict more injuries on yourself, you know."

"This was YOUR fault, you dumbass," Pearl growled.

Ruby brushed it off with a casual wave of the hand. "Ah, ignorance does not seem to be bliss in this case." He carefully lowered himself to a kneeling position and extended that same hand. "Let me cure that ignorance of yours before it gets me in more trouble."

Pearl grunted. "I can get myself up, thank you."

"Suit yourself. I'd be surprised if that atrocious neck warmer doesn't strangle you on the way up." Ruby adjusted his glasses in a gesture that seemed both wise and haughty.

Amber-colored fire sparked in Pearl's eyes. "Don't say another FRICKING WORD about my scarf!" he snarled, pushing himself up and grabbing his lime green scarf defensively.

"Fine, rot in ugliness, see if I care," Ruby shot back. At this time, his mother was walking back out to the two boys glaring at each other, sparks jumping between them.

"Oh dear, Ruby, is everything alright? I heard yelling. Have you explained anything to that boy yet?"

Ruby glanced at her, face flushed in anger and embarrassment. "Not yet, mother. I think I need to take that boy outside and teach him a lesson or two about Hoenn."

"HEY. I have a name," exclaimed the amber-eyed trainer. Ruby and his mother looked at him curiously.

"It's Pearl. Call me Pearl."

So there it is, my first submission on this site, which I made initially for this fic. Reviews are appreciated, criticism is okay (even though I'm not specifically looking for it).