Title: Making Sense of Scents
Rating: M
Warning: Language and BoyxBoy
Disclaimer: I own nothing, I obviously wouldn't be writing on FanFiction if I did. And Naruto would contain much more boy love, and Sasuke wouldn't leave.
I couldn't help but to take another bite of my apple savoring the taste slowly as it filled my mouth, closing my eyes as the sun beats down upon my face, warming me. Savoring the flavor within my mouth, I sigh in contentment, lying on the roof under the sun had become one of my favorite things to do. Finally having a break from missions was definitely something I'd been needed for the past few months. It had seemed like I was going to be doing nothing but constant missions. But finally, I'd been granted a few days of rest, even though it was as a result from how badly I'd been knocked around on my latest missions. Closing my eyes, taking in the scents surrounding me, I took another bite of the apple in my hand, allowing my mind to wander on aimlessly.
I've always been able to smell everything at a much stronger potency than all of my friends, trait of the clans and one that I'd had a love/hate relationship for nearly all my life. It wasn't that I wished I didn't have it, because I'm not sure I could function without it anymore, but sometimes it was just so - Well troublesome, to quote my best friend. I'd turned it into a tool when on missions, and in combat. I'd honed my over the top senses into something powerful, and useful. But sometimes, I wished I couldn't smell so well. And other times I wanted to nothing but sit and smell everything all at once. I had my least favorite scents, and my favorite scents. I could associate between the different scents of everyone in the village. I could find any of my friends around the village now, without Akamaru's help if I needed to. I knew all their scents. I knew many other shinobi's scents as well. There were some I enjoyed more than others, simply because they appealed to me more than other scents. Some I couldn't stand at all and would avoid at all costs.
I found myself sometimes avoiding Ino, because she constantly smelled of flowers and springtime. It wasn't that I minded flowers, or an open meadow; it's just that she smelled of nothing but flowers, all the time. It was a pretty powerful scent, seeing that it was multiple flowers mixed together. It irritated my nose some days, and sometimes I found myself searching her out to spend a few moments around her. Her scent was overpowering, but in a way I found myself often times soothed into a calm and easy mood after spending some time around it.
Shikamaru was probably the most entertaining scent, he'd asked me once about it when we were still back in the academy. Once he'd learned my sense of smell was stronger than normal and I could smell people's unique scents very easily, he wanted to know exactly what he'd smelled like. And Shikamaru wasn't sure if he should be pleased or concerned with the fact that he smells like chocolate cake. He'd sort of just given me his head cocked, eyebrow raised look and shrugged it off. He'd always been a close friend of mine, someone I went to when I needed to have a serious conversation with or when I just wanted to relax, he'd slowly but surely become my best friend. He'd been the first person I'd told about being gay, and he'd been silent for a long time, causing my anxiety to nearly sky rocket, before he'd calmly asked me in his monotone bored voice, if I was going to take a bite out of him now. I remember being shocked for a moment, before he'd smiled at me and said, "Maybe I taste like chocolate cake, too." I can't remember very many other times I'd laughed as hard as I had in that moment, he'd given me just what I needed. He'd accepted me, made me feel okay about my preference and then he'd made me laugh.
Kakashi-sensei had a smell that I oddly found myself enjoying, and if he found out I was laughing at in my mind as well as calling him sensei he'd probably have my head. I couldn't help the deep chuckle that came about with that thought, Kakashi was now my special team's captain, our tracking team was the best in the village. Even being much closer to the bi-polar pervert I still, to this day, could not figure out why the guy smelled like a mixture of orange and lemon. It wasn't as odd of a mixture as you'd think it would be, it was actually a very pleasant scent. I found myself often times trailing the copy-nin around the village when I was bored, searching out his scent on purpose. His scent stood out over nearly every other scent in the village. He'd laughed when I'd told him about why I was constantly following and stalking him around the village, continuing to make my search harder and harder every time, as he'd try to mask his scent and confuse the trail. There had been a few times I hadn't caught him, and those were the best bored days I had. I smiled at the thought of our little game, trying to remember the last time we'd actually had the time to goof off - I frowned when I realized it had been far too long. I rubbed absentmindedly at my shoulder when it twinge in pain.
Allowing my thoughts to continue to wander, my genin teammates shimmered to the forefront of my mind. Shino and Hinata both had pretty basic scents, yet not basic at all, as ironic as the two were themselves. I'd worked with them for so long, so closely that their scents had become very familiar to me. Shino smelled like his bugs, of course, but he also smelled of cedar and the ground after a heavy rain fall. A deep, musky scent that had taken me awhile to become accustom to. His scent wasn't unpleasant, but the bug factor tended to add something to it, that had set me on edge when we'd first been teamed together. Now, still being on the same team along with Kakashi, I rarely even noticed the actual bug's smell now that I'd gotten used to it, and tended to smell only Shino's actual scent aside from the bugs. Hinata had sort of soft subtle scent that became hard to pick up sometimes. She smelled of vanilla and cinnamon. I'd been oddly fascinated by her scent at first, never having noticed it before because it was such a soft scent, that sort of snuck up on me, washing over me. These days I found it oddly fitting because she was constantly cooking and baking for Naruto, and she was very confident whenever she was cooking. I grinned at the thought of the two of them together, shaking my head at how completely different they were, but how well they seemed to fit together.
My mom and sister both smelled nearly identical to one another. They both had a very strong scent that I still wasn't sure I could actually put a name too. It was a dominating scent, but not overpowering exactly. It wasn't necessarily a scent of anything in particular, but it was fairly strong and to me soothing scent. I enjoyed being around them, and I found myself always able to reign in my emotions if needed, when they were around. That I think had to do with the clan, they were my 'superiors' when it came to the clan's ranking. And so it made complete sense that I was submissive almost, when surrounded by their scents. I found it oddly comforting that I was upset at just thinking of myself as submissive. But, they had a protective scent about them, a mothering and nurturing scent, and I was nothing but grateful for it. They also that the always present underlying scent of dog, which I didn't find unpleasant either, since I knew it surrounded my own scent as well.
The three siblings from the sand smell exactly as you would expect. Gaara smells like the beach, warm sand. It is a comforting scent that makes me feel safe, regardless of the fact that when I'd first encountered Gaara he was oddly detached and slightly alarming. I couldn't feel anything but underlying warmth coming from him that had been pushed far down under something dark and terrifying. But now that Gaara had lost the demon that had once lived within him, he smells of nothing but sand. Temari smells like the wind, which oddly enough does have its own scent. The scent is nearly impossible to explain though. It's like the breeze, when you stand over the lake side; the fresh air untainted by anything. She's literally a breath of fresh air. And Kankuro smells a lot like his puppets; molded wood, metal and wood polish. He'd been highly amused when he'd learned of his scent, and how I'd complained about how artificial he really smelled. He didn't smell exactly like his puppets, there's a bit of a spicy kick to his scent underneath all of the other.
Hayate, a shinobi that had been a proctor at our first chunin exams and someone I'd been sent on a few missions with more recently, has a scent that makes me nervous and I tend to avoid him. It made me very uneasy to smell that much death, on a still living person. I can smell whatever illness he's plagued with, and I can almost smell the weakness revolving around him. Yet he still continues to amaze me with his never ending strength. His scent makes me a bit uneasy still, but he himself is someone I thoroughly look up to. Along with Genma, who unlike his lover Hayate, has a very appealing scent. Genma smells like sugar, nothing but sugar actually. His scent is sweet and subtle yet overpowering at the same time. And it ultimately reminds me of my childhood, before I'd seen the world through different eyes, back when things were simple. He's a walking contradiction and his scent matches that perfectly. Genma is easily one of my favorite shinobi in the entire village, and his scent is also one of my favorite scents of anyone's I've ever encountered.
I figured that my ability to sniff out people by their scent was both an advantage and disadvantage when it came to living in such a closely packed together village. I was constantly surrounded by people, some with strong scents, and some that barely smelled of anything at all. But not only that, I could smell their emotions and that was only slightly disturbing at the best of times. I sighed to myself thinking of all the awkward situations I'd barely avoided without turning into a blushing, stuttering girl. How annoying it all really -
"I don't understand why you love those so much," an even voice drawled from behind me, breaking me from my thoughts and causing me to turn towards the voice sharply. I'd been so caught up in my own thoughts I didn't even smell them approaching. I smiled and relaxed back against the roof when I saw who it was.
"You should know by now," I said easily, turning to look at him, taking in his slightly worn down stance. He looked more than tired, nearly exhausted. I jumped up easily, finishing the apple in a few bites and tossing the core aside. "You should sleep."
"You know I'd never get rest knowing you were up here," he said easily, hip popping out as his head tilted slightly to the side. I chuckled, shaking my head because I knew he was right, he wouldn't have been able to relax his body enough to actually fall asleep regardless of how exhausted he actually is.
"You didn't answer my question though," he said slowly, sighing as I wrapped him up into my arms. I nuzzled my face into his warm neck, feeling the pulse and sniffing deeply, drawing in his scent. My absolute favorite scent of all: apple and caramel. He had an overly addicting scent, one I just couldn't get enough of, causing me to crave all kinds of apples. I'd found myself eating at least one a day. I close my eyes slowly enjoying his warmth, the feel of his body against mine. It had been so long since we'd actually had more than just a few stolen hours, with one another.
"Because you smell exactly like the apples, Sasuke. You know that already though," I said easily my voice cautious and soft, before covering his mouth with mine, drinking him in deeply. Attempting to consume him as completely as he's already consumed every part of me. He melts into me, giving in to what we both need, both want. I pull back mumbled against his lips, "But you'll always taste better," before fusing our mouths together once more. I allowed myself to fall into him, basking in his warmth, his scent, his taste. Everything about him called to me, pulling me in and dragging me away from conscious thought.
Sasuke leaned back away from me suddenly, his head tilting backwards, his lean pale neck stretching beautifully that I had to force my eyes away from it instantly, his deep eyes narrowed tightly. I pushed down the urge to roll my eyes, the cold and calculating Uchiha always manage to rear up at times, the old Sasuke shining through and pushing everything a million steps backwards to where we'd first started. He slipped in and out of modes, warmth and love flipped quickly to distant and unattached. At first I'd found myself annoyed at the constant whiplash of emotion, but I found myself slowly growing accustom to his odd, and erratic behavior and mood swings. After all there was nothing I could do about it, I'd tried and it had only ended with the worst fight we've ever had. I didn't want to relive those feelings, those words, or any of those actions ever again.
"You're such a sap, Inuzuka" Sasuke said, his voice deep and ragged. I noticed how his body was leaning into me, warmth and protection was something he was constantly craving, seeking and it hurt me more than I cared to admit to see him constantly pulling back from what I was offering him. Someone else to take control, make the decisions, take the lead for him. He always hated the anger that welled up in him, I could see it, I could smell it, and I could even just sense it on him every time it would start to take over. That dark cloud of frustration that would settle upon his shoulders sometimes, it was the entire reason we'd even gotten together. I'd wanted to fix him, to help him, to save him. I hadn't known why, I still wasn't sure why. I'd never put this much effort into a relationship before, and I hoped I'd never have to again; I didn't want to lose all the ground I'd gained with the Uchiha, ever.
"Can't help the truth," I whispered softly, my voice breaking slightly, suddenly feeling vulnerable and small even though my arms were tightly wrapped around the boy, who was both shorter and leaner than I. I fought against the urge to twitch, unsure of why I was flustered all the sudden. Something just seemed off; this wasn't his usual detachment, this was something new entirely. His head tilted to the side, as an elegant eyebrow rose slightly. I ground my teeth against the biting remark that was threatening to spill from my lips at the obviously proud Uchiha look on his face, his eyes blank, his lips turned up in a slight smirk.
I turned my head away from it, I was used to the mood swings but it never got any easier to see him look at me as if I didn't really matter. It made me feel foolish, something my own pride didn't enjoy, something I was constantly fighting to push down because I couldn't afford to lose control with him. I let my arms drop away from him and took a few slow steps backwards the minute I felt my hands start to shake, refusing to look at him as I attempted to get my body back under my complete control again. I froze at the whimper that sounded in the silence, knowing that it hadn't come from my own mouth. I turned back locking eyes with Sasuke, whose eyes were now wide and uncertain; one hand was reaching out towards me as if he had no control over it. His eyes stared back openly confused, his lip worried between his teeth harshly, something that keyed me in instantly to the true panic the last Uchiha heir was currently feeling.
"I –" He started, his voice cut off quickly. He was shaking suddenly, his entire body. I felt intense fear seize me, as I could do nothing but helplessly watch as the proud lost boy was slowly falling apart in front of my eyes. He seemed to be fighting a battle with himself, and I had no clue if he was winning or losing. He'd never been easy to read, even falling in love with him hasn't help me to understand him much more than I had when I'd barely known him at all. It wasn't an easy thing to see him like this, and not understand. Not knowing what I was supposed to do, what I should be doing was causing my entire body to ache.
"Sasuke?" I heard myself whispered brokenly before I'd even realized I had opened my mouth. I cringed at my own voice sounding so far away and weak. I felt like the lost one now. Sasuke was a blur of movement, and then he was wrapped around me tightly. His entire body was curled around me, his hands digging into the hair at the base of my neck and holding on tightly, pulling at my hair almost uncomfortably but I didn't mind, I barely felt it at all. His entire body was pressed up against mine, as if he was trying to merge his body with my own. The heat radiating off of him was overwhelming, and suffocating. I felt myself tense in confusion, before I wrapped my own arms tightly around the boy in my arms that had started to sob uncontrollably against me.
"Fuck," He whimpered lowly, his hands pulling against my hair harder, I winced but said nothing. "Just… don't leave me," I felt more than heard him murmur after some time against my neck, where his face was hidden, his hot tears burning as they rolled down over my neck and shoulder, his voice fading out into the silence that surrounded us. He was clinging onto me for dear life, as if I was the only thing capable of holding him up, holding him together. And for the first time since I'd started to pay attention to the lonely boy I felt like maybe he needed me as much as I'd grown to need him.