Author's Note: I'm going to write this story until I get some ideas for my Nate/Hallie one. But; I've also fallen in love with Barrett Foa. ^.^

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except my OC Kaylee; because everything else belongs to Shane Brennan.

Oh, there's even a quote in here from someone called Jeneveve87; I'll put that there also because I really don't own it. XD.

She grew up with
the children of the stars in the
hollywood hills and the boulevard
her parents threw big parties
everyone was there
they hung out with folks like dennis
hopper, bob seeger, and sonny and cher
but she feels safe now
in the bar on fairfax
and from the stage I can tell that
she can't let go and she can't relax
and just before
she hangs her head to cry
I sing to her a lullaby,

Why is it we always fall for our best friends? Is it because we know we can trust them? Is it because we know them so well? Is it because of the way they know exactly what's going on in our heads? Or is it because they are there any day, anytime, anywhere without the promise of kisses, intimate touches or whispered sentiments of love? I think you love them because you can't be apart from someone for too long...you're always thinking of them, and when you're with them you never want to say goodbye. Love is far from simple. It's quite complex. It's a mix of about everything. It's sadness, joy, passion, hatred, excitement, it's almost every feeling you can imagine and more.

You know love when you find it, it's that person that when they smile it brightens up your day, you can't stop staring at them for fear of losing them, they're always on your mind, you daydream of being with them, even if they're less than 20 feet away...and you can't stand it when they're not with you, the worst feeling you could ever feel is when you know that person you love is not with you...you can't tell when love will happen, you just know when it does, that moment when you first lay eyes on that person, and you never want to look away...that is love. Nothing less.

I loved him before I was actually aware of it. I loved him when it all began two years ago; out partnership. Batman and Robin, Shake and Bake, Peanut butter and Jelly.

We would have sleepovers every Friday night at his house. Staying up into the early morning playing video games on the Xbox and eating now cold pizza. We would sleep in the bed together if we got too tired; because we were adults, and we could keep our hands to ourselves. I could keep the urge to kiss him or more to myself; I always slept with my back to him because I didn't trust myself not too. Every morning I would wake with an arm protectively around me; I would fight the urge to snuggle in closer to him and instead getting up out of the bed and walking into the kitchen; watching the surfers on the beach catching the early morning swell.

When I was sick with the flu, he came over without fear of catching it himself and made me rest. He gave me his laptop and sat with me on my bed; teaching me how to play the latest version of COD. He made me a hot water bottle and placed it by my feet; he would climb in with me and help me play the game. I asked him why he wasn't at work and he told me that Hetty had given him the day off to look after me.
And for that, I would love him for a lifetime.

The day that Dom died; the day he was gunned down and killed by terrorists. The whole atmosphere in the ops room was cold, distant and disbelieving. My mind shouted to me to walk away and not look back. There was Kensi, Sam and Callen on the roof; tears falling from their eyes as I struggled to keep my own at bay. Hetty was the first to leave the room; then Nate to go and comfort her. It left just me and Eric. He didn't say anything. Because all day we had worked on the laptop to try and get it to work; we thought of what we were going to do with Dom when he came back to us.
Finally, I felt the first tear drop onto my cheek; then another, and then another. In seconds I had fallen to the floor crying with my head in my hands.

Eric was quickly by my side comforting me; telling me that everything was going to be okay and how he was going to help me through this; how we were going to help each other.
I quickly noticed that he wasn't crying; yet his eyes were telling me that he wasn't because he was trying to be strong for me. My arms wrapped around his neck as I buried myself my face in his chest. He rubbed my back as I continued to cry. The little make up around my eyes started to smudge slightly as I tried to slow my breathing down.

Later that night; we both decided to go home; knowing that there was nothing more that we could do. He took me back to my apartment and we sat on the couch all night listening to my ipod through the speakers and eating left over Chinese.
Neither of us knew what to say; how to comfort each other. We knew Sam and his wife were at home. Callen and Kensi were probably at a bar somewhere and Nate was back at the office with Hetty writing up a report of some sort.
All we had was each other that night; and I didn't know if I really wanted it any other way. His arm was placed firmly around my shoulders as if I would fall apart if he let go, I don't know. I probably would.

We weren't agents like the others; we only got and gave the intel to the rest of the team. Hetty constantly told us that without us the team would fall apart; cases would never be solved and we wouldn't have a job. We didn't know how to deal with blows like this. Because we were always safe back in the structure of the office; the four walls protected us. I once asked Eric what he would do if I became a field agent and he just laughed and said that there was no other way to describe it.
When we went to bed; he climbed in next to me and placed an arm around my waist; holding me close to his body. The way best friends do. He wouldn't think anything of it; yet I thought everything of it. Because I was so in love with him that just being in his arms was almost like my wildest dreams had come true.

He didn't think anything of me then a little sister; a best friend.
And in the morning; everything would be normal between us; it always happened. And I don't know how I'm supposed to deal with it. I've asked Kensi, I've asked Hetty. They've both told me that I should tell him; Kensi said it more of a tone of 'You should kiss him and see what he does', but I can't, because they're not in my position, they don't have him over at nights, they don't have him kiss the side of your head when you're upset. But I suppose that's something; at least he cares about me; just not the way I want him too.