12/06/2010

So, I've rewritten the first chapter of my story. I like this chapter soooo much better than the original chapter. I feel like it's much better structured and not as rushed as the first one was. It's still just as violent, so be warned! Later on in the story, it will be explained why Ashlynn's entrance into Narnia is so violent. Also, another reason I rewrote this chapter is because I feel like the original first chapter kind of gave my story a bad rep. I noticed that there were way more views on my first chapter than there were on my other chapters, which means that people have read the first chapter and have not liked it and so assumed the rest of the story was just as bad. So, hopefully this version is much more realistic.

Let me know what you think of this chapter, and, if more people liked the other version better, I'll put it back up. :)

"Ashlynn?" The girl in front of me asked. My emotions returned immediately after that.

"Fuck off, Renee. You don't accidentally agree to sign without your band. You don't forget that you didn't write the songs you are stealing." I shouted, grabbing my guitar case out of her hands and turning away from her in anger.

"Ashlynn, don't do this. Come back. It's cold outside and you don't even have a jacket."

I turned and looked at her. "You care about my well-being now? Didn't think about my well-being when you stole my songs, did you?"

"It's late. Let's talk about this at home."

I let out a sardonic laugh. "Home. Right. I think I'll walk." I stormed out of the bar, ignoring Renee's protests.

"Ashlynn! Stop being ridiculous. Jack's going to drive us. Come back! It's not safe to walk home now!"

The door slammed behind me as I stood outside the bar fuming. I hiked the strap to my guitar case higher on my shoulder and threw a look to my right. There was a group of young men hanging out and acting rowdy on the corner of the street. They were clearly intoxicated and, luckily, had not noticed me. I attempted to pull my low cut top higher on my dress and cursed Renee again for convincing me to wear it. I walked in the opposite direction of the group and forgot about them immediately.

This wasn't the first time Renee and I had been in a fight over issues concerning the band. We had been getting more and more popular as a local band over the past few months, and, not surprisingly, we were noticed by a local recording company. I had just found out that she had gone behind mine and the boys back and signed a deal with the recording company as a solo artist. She had even told them she had a few songs written, even though I had been the one to compose the songs for her to sing with our band. My mind swam with these thoughts as I stormed away from the bar.

"How dare she!" I hissed to myself.

"Hey Sweetheart! Looking for some fun?"

I turned and saw the group of guys from before walking behind me. I rolled my eyes at the idiot as he and his friends catcalled me. I wasn't in the mood to deal with some drunk, frat boys. I turned away, ignoring them. I quickened my pace when I realized that I was in a rather deserted area and out of shouting distance for help, if the need arose.

"Awe, come on Baby! Don't be harsh! We're only playing!" The same guy called out again.

I turned and glared at him. "I'm not in the mood, dude." I continued walking.

I heard trotting footsteps and turned and saw the guy running up to me. "I'm sorry, Sweetheart. Just having some fun. Hey, weren't you up on stage earlier?"

I nodded and eyed his friends warily. They were watching me with drunken and amused smiles and I didn't like the way they were watching me as if they were expecting something.

"Yeah." I replied shortly, returning my cautious stare to the guy in front of me. He wasn't bad looking, but I found myself despising him just for messing with me.

"You're pretty good at guitar for a girl." He grinned at me and swayed on the spot from his drunkenness. His gaze drifted down towards my chest and my irritation grew.

"Look, can I help you or something?" I asked icily.

"Oh yes you can." He suggested with a wink. I rolled my eyes and turned around. He grabbed my arm.

"Let go of my arm." I growled.

"What kinna guitar do ya play?" He drunkenly mumbled, swaying some more. His friends started laughing and walking towards us.

"Dude, seriously, unless you need me to call you a cab, let me go." I ripped my arm from his grasp and kept walking.

"Come on! Stop being a bitch and chill out. We only want to talk to you." He demanded, grabbing me again and forcing me to face him. I pushed him away from me and tried to get away from him. His friends started laughing from behind him and urging him on.

"Come on, man. You gonna let her just push you like that?" I heard one of the guys ask. I quickened my pace and then felt him grab me from behind quite forcefully, nearly making me trip.

"Let go of me!" I shouted, trying to pull away from him. He and his friends started laughing at me, which made me angrier. When he let me go, I turned around and punched him square in the nose. He let out a shout of pain and his friends, who were dumbstruck at my action, stood still and gaped at me. While he was distracted with the blood pouring from his nose and his friends drunkenly stupefied, I took off running. I didn't slow my pace until I was out of sight of the idiots. I figured at this point they wouldn't bother chasing after me, as I was long gone.

My anger at Renee had disappeared for the moment, as I was too frightened about my experience with those guys to think about her betrayal. My mind started drifting to other things in an attempt to calm myself. I remember noticing different things that night. I noticed how I hadn't seen one car on the road since I started walking. Granted, in was two in the morning, but traffic in Orlando is always busy, day or night. Also, half the street lights had to be out. It was like every fourth lamp was busted. There were no stars in the sky either. Not one. Also, there was none of the usual traffic, human, and animal sounds I could usually associate with Orlando. Dogs were always barking. People were always shouting. Cars were always honking. The time never altered any of these facts. That should have alerted me to the fact that something drastic was going to happen. I'm a big believer in signs. I should have noticed it then.

I was about a mile away from my apartment when I was attacked. My guitar was ripped from my back so violently that my shoulder was wrenched out of socket. I screamed out in pain and turned to see what had happened when I found myself captured between two unfriendly big arms. One of the guys from the bar held me in a bear hug from behind, restricting me from using my arms and holding me off the ground. The pressure from his grip on my arms caused me even more agonizing pain because of my shoulder and I started crying.

I found myself facing the rest of the group as the guy who was holding me turned so I could see them. The guy I had punched was holding a rag of some sort to his nose and it was nearly drenched in blood. His eyes revealed his anger and terror seized me in a tight and fearful grip.

"You fucking broke my nose, Bitch!" He shouted.

"You fucking grabbed me! Of course I'm going to punch you, Douche Bag!" I shouted back. The guy let out a growl of anger and threw his towel to the ground. He approached me quickly and punched me square in the face. My vision went black as pain ripped across my face and blood poured down it. The grip on my arms loosened and I found myself on the ground, unable to hold myself up due to the shock of the punch. I reached out with my good arm and grabbed my face in an effort to somehow alleviate the pain. My dislocated arm hung uselessly at my side as I stared up at the group of guys in fear and disgust.

"This is payback." The guy growled, staring at me hatefully.

"Great. You're such a brave guy. Taking on a small girl with three of your fucking goons. Do you usually beat up ten year-olds, and have moved up in the world by jumping me?" I asked sarcastically.

"You're lucky you're a girl, or your punishment would be more severe." He replied before he and his group turned to walk away.

"You're lucky you're a girl, or this would be pathetic." I yelled back as I stood up and grabbed my guitar off the ground. The intoxicated guy turned around and looked at me.

"What did you say?" He asked threateningly.

I stared at him. "I said you're a fucking pathetic pansy. Attacking girls is so smooth. I hope you go to hell."

I regretted my words as soon as I said that. He started running towards me, which caused me to turn and try and run away from him. He lurched towards me and grabbed my ankle, causing me to fall down on the sidewalk. I shouted out as I landed on my dislocated shoulder and felt something in my side crack.

I felt the guy scrambling behind me and turned on my back. He jumped on me and started punching me where ever he could reach. I tried to fight him off, and when I found I couldn't do so with my arm, I lifted my leg and kicked him between his legs. He grabbed himself and fell off of me and onto the ground moaning in pain. I pulled myself away from him and had to pull myself into a standing position by grabbing onto the bench we were beside and lifting myself up.

The guys friends were just staring at us and exchanging wary glances between one another.

"I think she's had enough, Dean." One of the bigger guys stated. "Let's go home."

The guy I had kicked, who I had just learned was named Dean, groaned and stood up. He glared at me, ignoring his friends. I was leaning on the bench in agonizing pain and still found the energy to glare back.

"Turn around and leave, Bitch, and maybe I won't kill you." I stared at Dean like he was crazy.

"Are you serious? I was leaving. I was going home. You fucking attacked me so I responded. I didn't do shit to you but defend myself. Why don't you just listen to your friends and go home before I get home and call the police?"

He continued to glare at me, so I rolled my eyes and turned around and started limping away. I hadn't taken five steps when I felt a hand grab my neck, pulling me backwards, and something sharp and cold force its way into my back. My eyes widened and I found myself trying to breathe. The pain was so excruciating that I found my lungs were incapable of working. I kept gasping like a fish out of water, even as he dragged me away from the sidewalk and further into the bushes that lined it. I noticed, through my blurry vision, a trail of blood following after me.

"Dean! That's enough!" Another of the guys called. I felt myself pulled away from him by another pair of hands, and heard a small struggle happen in front of me. My vision had become dark, and I found I could no longer see.

"Dean, stop!"

"Back the fuck off, David!" Dean shouted.

"Dude, you fucking knifed her man. You're in for if we don't leave now."

"I'm not finished with her yet." Dean growled back. I felt my body drop to the ground as the hands that held me let go.

"Fine man. Do what you want. But, we don't want any part in this." One of the guys said. I felt hands touch my pants, but I no longer had the energy to fight them. I heard footsteps walking away and I opened my eyes and looked at the retreating figures.

"Help." I whispered, unable to speak any louder. One of the guys turned and looked at me. There was pity in his eyes. "Please." I repeated.

"Dean..." The guy pleaded as he looked over at his friend. My gaze returned to the prick now attempting to undress me. He looked over at his friend and sighed. His gaze turned to mine and hardened.

"You messed with the wrong guy." He stated, before he hit me in the face again. I passed out immediately.

Please, please, please let me know what you think! I'll add chapter 15 soon! Don't worry! I know that's the chapter you really want to read. lol.

Also, for first time viewers of my story, please keep reading! I promise the story gets so much better!