"Hey, get up!"

Izaya shoved his hands in his coat pockets and cocked an eyebrow, taking a few cautious steps towards the body lying in front of him. Rubble and debris were strewn across the Ikebukuro alley that had previously been a battleground for the two men. It was as if a tornado had swept through the area. 'Something like that, at least' the conscious one thought.

"Well, well, playing dead is certainly a new trick for you, Shizu-chan." The informant taunted, attempting to provoke the other man. Though he didn't really believe that was the case. Heiwajima Shizuo wasn't exactly the type to deal with tactics or strategic planning. Hence why, driven into a blinding rage by the mere sight of Izaya, he had ripped the closest thing out of the ground to hurl at him. Which just happened to be a telephone pole, logically wired to another telephone pole that came falling down with a sick crack onto the blonde's head.

Izaya had now reached the fallen man. Muscles tensed, he gave his shoulder a slight nudge with his foot, and then delivered a harder kick. No response. Well, at least there was something out there that could crack the brute's thick skull. Of course, what would instantly kill any normal human had probably only bought Izaya a minute or two's time to escape. As he turned and began to stroll down the alley, he wondered if he should at least leave a bottle of aspirin as a parting gift.

"Ngggh~"

Hearing the groan, Izaya slowed to a hault. To a passerby he would still look as relaxed as any other person out for an afternoon stroll, but mentally he was prepared to finish what they had started.

Shizuo had managed to sit up, but still had to balance himself with both hands on the ground to keep from toppling over again. There was a hazy, distant look in his eyes as he surveyed their damaged surroundings.

"What the hell is going on here?"

"Don't tell me you forgot, Shizu-chan? We were on a beautiful, romantic date together, of course!" The informant spread out his hands, as if this was an obvious fact. Any moment now, a slab of concrete or dumpster would come sailing in his direction, but Shizuo was just too fun to provoke. "We held hands, and ate ice cream, and we were just about to have our very first…" he trailed off, sensing that something was wrong. Instead of attempting murder, the blonde was just giving him the most puzzling look.

" I'm gay?"

Something was definitely wrong here, and Izaya was positive that Shizuo suddenly gaining a sense of humor wasn't it. With a few purposeful strides he closed the distance between them and grabbed the other man's face, forcing eye contact. Shizuo's signature glasses were lying buried somewhere underneath this mess and his pupils were dilated. He squinted up at the other, as if he was still having trouble focusing.

"Who am I?" Izaya asked plainly.

Shizuo's brows knit together as he tried to remember. "… we've met before. " he said, slowly. "I think… I think I've known you for a while?" It was more of a question than a statement, and as Izaya let him go he was convinced. Shizuo was suffering from memory loss, and it had to be pretty bad for him to forget about Izaya. Bad enough to warrant a hospital visit, definitely. But that was so much paperwork, and he really was a busy man. Best to just let Shinra know the brute's location. Shizuo was buddy buddy enough with his girlfriend that they wouldn't leave him here long. Not that Izaya cared if he got treatment at all, anyway. Shizuo was possibly the only person to whom his love of humanity did not extend.

"Sorry."

Izaya's thoughts stopped in their tracks. He glanced behind him, but found that the only other person in the alley was still just Shizuo, sitting in front of him and looking uncomfortably at the crushed pack of smokes he had pulled from his pocket.

"What?" Surely that right then had not been Shizuo. Apologizing. To him.

Shizuo grit his teeth and mumbled. "If we were on a date then you're… you're my boyfriend, right?" He hastily removed a cigarette and put it in his mouth. "And I can't even remember your name." he finished hurriedly, lighting the smoke and avoiding looking Izaya in the eyes.

The informant had to will himself to keep his jaw from dropping open. He'd seen a lot of things in his life, but an apologetic and, dare he say it… embarrassed Shizuo could possibly be one of the strangest and most unexpected. Ideas were running wild through his head right now. He doubted the memory loss would be permanent, but if Shizuo thought that they really we dating, even if only for a couple of hours, then opportunities to gather blackmail material would be tremendous. Of course, if Izaya had to be honest there really wasn't much that the former bartender could offer him. It was mostly justification to plain humiliate him more.

"It's Izaya." he replied, offering a helping hand up. Treatment could wait.