Title: Of Cigarettes and Broken Hearts
Summary: Draco and Harry are broken and burning without each other.
Author: bleedforyou1
Beta: vanessawolfie

Word Count: 1,758
Rating: PG-13
Warning: slash. angst.
Note: This is my first "real" angst story. However, don't let it scare you, because it does have a happy ending!

Draco popped another pill in his mouth and threw his head back, swallowing it with a gulp of disgusting tap water. He wondered if he would be able to make it out into the real world today, which he hadn't done since Harry had left him. Two weeks ago.

Rubbing his swollen eyes, he cursed softly at the vicinity of his dirty hotel room and went into the bathroom. Grimacing at his reflection, he preformed the simple tooth-cleaning charm he had learned from his mother at age 5.

After accomplishing that, he stumbled over to the bed and dived under the covers yet again, reaching over to the bedside table and clutching the now-familiar pack of cigarettes. Fuck the real world. He was going to take a nice long drag then go back to sleep.


"Damn…that was…wow," the girl gasped as Harry pulled out and collapsed next to her. He panted for a bit and let her snuggle up to him.

Staring at the white speckled ceiling, he wished he could just go to sleep. Go to sleep or get the hell away from his stupid, annoying life that was consuming him.

"You're so…awesome," she was mumbling in his ear with her absolutely disgusting nasally voice. Her inky black hair was too long and just too much as she rested her head against his chest. "Best fuck of my life for sure!"

"Get out. Please."

"What?" She looked up, the confusion too much for her tiny brain to contemplate after the mind blowing orgasm Harry had apparently given her. Not that he was trying. He had barely even come himself, as he just couldn't do it anymore without thinking of him. So, as per usual, he just shut his eyes and thought of silky blonde hair and silver eyes staring up at him.

"I'm not going to see you after tonight, so you might as well leave now," Harry said thickly, pulling up the blankets and curling inside them.

"But…I thought we really, you know, connected!" The girl—damn, he couldn't even remember her name—whined. "I let you fuck me in the arse! Wait—are you dating another girl?"

He sighed as his heart broke a little more. A little, day by day, he supposed…until there was nothing left but shattered pieces.

"No. Now, please, just leave me alone."

"Fine. Bastard," she muttered, getting up and stomping around for her clothes. Before she had even shut the door, he had already fallen into his dreams of Draco.


Biting his lip in concentration, Draco stared down at the Daily Prophet's newest crossword puzzle in confusion. He couldn't understand what the clue was asking for. Our best and worst hero. He had already tried several answers, but the paper just kept erasing them because he was wrong.

Suddenly, his eyes widened and he penciled in the letters to his favorite name in the world. Harry Potter. The answer flashed green and stayed on the page, indicating he had gotten the correct answer.

Draco laid his head down on the tiny table in the corner of the Leaky Cauldron's tiniest room and cried. He couldn't control the tears that had been waiting since the night Harry screamed at him to leave their flat and never come back.


Waking up from a vivid dream of screaming and crying, Harry lay awake in his silent bedroom.

Harry hadn't been back to their flat since the night that he and Draco had broken up. He wondered if Winky was still cleaning it. He had been sleeping at Grimmauld Place for two weeks now, and it wasn't getting any easier for him to live without Draco.

He had cried a lot at first, but now it seemed as if he was so dead to everything, tears just wouldn't come. Harry had loitered about, sniveling to his friends, but after even they had gotten sick of him, he had simply started picking up random chicks at bars he went to. Sometimes it was a contest with himself to see how stupid of a girl he could get.

Like the girl from earlier tonight…she had been the absolute opposite of Draco in everyway. Dumb, female, black hair, expressionless blue eyes, unhealthily skinny body…

All the same, he felt like every time he had sex with some stupid bint, he was getting back at Draco little by little, even though it hurt to hear a girl scream during sex when all he wanted to do was make Draco moan again.

Harry rolled over onto his stomach and reached into his drawer for a familiar old t-shirt. There was still a whiff of Draco's scent, so he curled up with it and fell asleep.


"I know it's true! I SAW YOU KISS HIM!"

"No! I didn't—it wasn't like that!"

"Shut the fuck up, Draco! Get out! GET OUT!"

"Harry, would you just listen to me? Please! I love you!"

"No you don't! I never want to see your face again, you bastard!"

The words were ringing in Draco's ears as he sat up in bed, took one look at the surrounding room and suddenly ran to the bathroom. After tossing over what little dinner he had had with room service, he sat on the floor of the bathroom and put his head in his hands.

He couldn't do it anymore. He couldn't just sit by and let Harry think he didn't love him.

Standing up groggily, he did a quick time spell to see that it was 2:30 in the middle of the night. Memories of waking up Harry in the middle of the night to make love almost made him cry again. He held strong and curled his fingers around his sides, holding himself together until morning came.


The next morning, Harry awoke to a loud scream that rang throughout the house. His heart nearly stopped when his sleep-addled brain realized it as Draco's scream.

Harry ran as fast as he could, crashing into several objects as he flew down the stairs and into the foyer, where Draco was crouched behind the sofa.

"Draco?" Harry's voice was much less manly than usual to his dismay.

Suddenly, an elf flew out of nowhere with a metal pan and began attacking Draco, making him scream and try to crawl away.

"Winky! Stop!" Harry ordered, watching as Winky dropped the pan and moved away from Draco in obedience. "What are you doing?"

"Master told Winky to 'never allow Malfoy in this house'!"

"You ordered her to kill me?" Draco squealed, getting up from behind the sofa, his hair in disarray and his clothes rumpled and dirty.

"I… I must've been drunk. I'm sorry. I mean—wait, what are you doing here?" Harry stared at Draco.

"I just…I need to talk to you, Harry…"

"No, you don't. It's over, Draco."

"I know…I just, please, let me just tell you what happened."

Harry stood in silence as Draco explained everything from that night.

"Blaise and I were having dinner, like I told you we would. Then, Pansy came in…she told Blaise she was pregnant with his baby. Blaise got really angry, because he never wanted children. Blaise and Pansy started going at it, and I tried to diffuse the situation, but Pansy cursed Blaise. She put a spell on him that made it so that he was in constant pain unless someone who cared about him kissed him. She left before I could figure out what happened, and…he was just screaming and crying from pain like he was under the Cruciatus curse, Harry. I couldn't just leave him like that. And I care about him as a friend, so I just…kissed him. And that's when you came in, and you saw it and then started screaming before I could explain!"

Draco had started crying again, tears rolling down his cheeks as he held his sides.

"Oh, Draco."

Harry's heart finally, finally shattered like he knew it would. In moments, he was holding Draco, curling his arms around his love's shoulders and crying too.

"You—fucking—didn't…trust me," Draco said between sobs, hitting Harry's shoulder half-heartedly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so so so sorry…I didn't know what to think. I knew you had a thing for Blaise in school…I just—I'm so sorry, baby," Harry mumbled, allowing Draco to punch him softly in the side.

"I hate that I love you so freaking much, you hasty, annoying, stubborn Gryffindor," Draco cried, leaning up and staring at Harry with tear-brimmed eyes.

"Why didn't you come earlier? Tell me the truth two weeks ago?"

"You fucking kicked me out! I do have some pride, you jerk!"

"Draco…I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing and kiss me already."

Harry was about to do it, but he just…couldn't. Not without Draco knowing the truth about what Harry had done.

"I…."

"What did you just say?" Draco pulled away, staring at Harry with horror.

"I slept with a few girls while you were gone."

"What? How could you—"

"I didn't…I just felt like getting you back for how bad you broke my heart! I was drunk at bars and they offered and I just wanted to hurt you for how much you hurt me…"

Draco was shaking his head, looking everywhere but at Harry.

"You didn't even think. You didn't even care about my side of the story."

"I'm so sor—"

"Stop apologizing!" Draco screamed. "Don't you have anything else to say?"

"I love you. Those girls…they were the opposite of you in everyway I could manage. They were stupid crazy girls who only wanted Harry Potter, not me. I hated every second of being away from you and I just wanted to wallow in the pain."

Draco felt his weight leave him, so he sat down on the edge of the sofa he had been hiding behind earlier and put his head in his hands yet again.

Harry sighed and sat down next to him, sitting in silence as Draco mulled it over.

"You and I both know I'm going to forgive you eventually, but you're going to have to work for it. And I mean seriously work for it, you wanker."

Draco pulled out a cigarette pack from the inside of his jacket and lit one up, putting it between his lips and wiping his eyes roughly.

Harry watched as the fire from Draco's cigarette burned and more tears fell from his eyes. He didn't feel dead inside anymore. He had Draco back, and this time he knew he'd keep him for good.