T-rated story. Maybe an M-rated story later, though not in this chapter. Enjoy!

Don't Ever

It was the week after Sectionals. As Will Schuester was in his classroom grading homework, he smiled after remembering the Glee Club sing "Dog Days Are Over". They were so close to losing to the Dalton Warblers because of their lack of unity, but he was satisfied that they were able to pull it off in the end and tie with the Warblers. Granted, he was not happy that Kurt was at Dalton Academy now. During the performance, Will noticed that Kurt seemed to not be happy singing with the Warblers. He was so happy while he was at McKinley, where his artistic abilities roamed free. Will felt that Kurt was suppressed artistically while at Dalton and being force to sing backup, but Will didn't want to worry about that now. Will decided he will talk to Kurt in the near future, in the hopes that Kurt will change his mind and come back to New Directions. If Kurt decided to not come back, Will realized that New Directions will have even harder competition with both the Warblers and Vocal Adrenaline at Regionals. Kurt, however, was not the subject matter that was on Will's mind.

He had Emma on his mind as well. While bringing his trophy into her office and hearing her quickie marriage with Carl Howell, the good news of winning Sectionals seemed like nothing at that point. Her news broke Will's heart. Thinking of this turned Will's smile into a frown. While he leaned back to his chair, Will evaluated his relationship with Emma. He knew that Emma was a person who acted on impulse a lot and he knew that she couldn't help it. But marriage in just a weekend? Will knew that Emma almost married Coach Tanaka, but luckily, he broke off the marriage after she had chosen to go with the Glee club to Sectionals. Will had told her that even though she was dating Carl, he would respect her and still wait for her no matter what because he still loved her. Well…now she's married, Will thought. There was nothing he could do about it. This was another instant where Will's heart was broken and he wanted this to be the last time Emma would break his heart. He had decided right then and there to stop his shenanigans he pulled in order to be with Emma. At last, Will felt the pangs of being lonely, but he didn't realize he wasn't the only one who felt the same way. There was someone else who also had their heart broken after Sectionals. Someone who could relate to Will at this particular moment, but that person didn't have just thoughts of loneliness. That person had thoughts of ending her own life.

Checking his watch, Will realized that it was time for Glee rehearsal. As he walked out of his classroom and toward the choir room, Will recalled seeing strange behaviors occurring within Rachel Berry. Normally during rehearsal, she would raise a point about how she was artistically and musically superior to everyone else, but for the past few days after Sectionals, Rachel had been awfully quiet. It probably had something to do with the breakup of Rachel and Finn. It was obvious after Will noticed Rachel and Finn sitting apart and not even speaking to each other during rehearsal. Finn took it okay, Will noticed. Finn was right back to being his normal self, as if he never even had a girlfriend before. Rachel was different. Will knew that Rachel was a very fragile girl and she had to be handled with care. Even the slightest touch of heartbreak, Will knew Rachel's world would come crashing through. She needed a friend to help her during those times. The bad thing was that Rachel didn't have any actual friends she could confide in. It was something that Will felt that would push Rachel to the limits and he was right.

As Will turned into the choir room, he could see the kids having their usual conversations, but this time, he noticed Santana and Brittany making fun of Rachel. As always, their insults were hurtful. In the past, Will would often overlook these remarks because Will always viewed Rachel as a person who was able to ignore such comments, but it was different this time. Will could see it in the look in Rachel's eyes. Tears were beginning to develop as the insults grew and the class erupting in laughter. Even worse, Finn was laughing at Santana's joke about Rachel. That probably did it. Seeing Finn laugh at Rachel broke her. She quickly ran out of the room, clutching a notebook journal in her arms closely. All Will could see was the glistening of her tears as she glided past him.

Bully. That is the one thing that Will despised probably the most. He hated his kids being bullied on, but he never noticed that his kids were also part of the bullying. He hated seeing his own Glee kids bullying one of their own. Glee club was supposed to be a haven for the outsiders and a place of equality. Seeing them hurt one another like this enraged Will.

"What are you guys doing?" Will shouted to the Glee members.

"What are you talking about Mr. Schue? We were just having fun," replied Santana.

"Having fun? At the expense of another person's feelings?" Will retorted back.

"Chill, Mr. S. We were just kidding around. Rachel probably knows we're joking," Quinn said, defending Santana's actions.

"No. What you guys did crossed a line," Will responded to Quinn. His eyes glared upon all of the Glee members and he addressed to them, "I am ashamed of you guys. We were supposed to be a team, a family. And families don't hurt the feelings of others. I thought you guys would learn that by now. I've seen you guys bully Rachel all the time. You may notice her demeanor of being calm when you laugh at her, but it builds up. How would you guys like it if I bully you all the time? Quinn, would you like it if I bring up your past mistakes by being pregnant or the fact you learned nothing from being pregnant and became a grade-A bitch? Santana, would you like me to remind you of your boob job or the fact that you and Brittany are the school's sluts everyday? Finn, how would you like me to mention the fact that you're freakishly tall for a teenager or the fact that you're stupidier than 99% of the people in this school? How do you guys like it if I bring all the bad qualities about you and make fun of it? Rachel is a beautiful girl, but you bring out the parts of herself that she doesn't like about herself. Those are the parts that hurt her the most. Besides Puck, I don't think anyone cares for Rachel, do they?" No one would dare look at Will to answer his question.

Will continued, "I know Rachel is irritating sometimes, but that girl is damned talented. She may say that there is something wrong with your singing, but it is meant to help you. She doesn't say 'you suck' and that's it. She tells you what you can do to improve. Granted, she may not be the best singer of all time, but she is the most talented in our Glee club. She knows more about the music, bar Kurt of course, than any of you guys. Her critique is not even an attack on your personality or your looks or anything. It is advice to make you become a better singer. She herself even needs your advices as well. Though she may respond back negatively, she appreciates the fact that you guys care for her enough to tell her when she is doing something wrong. She strives to be the best and she strives to help you become the best, so our Glee club can work as one unit. To work as one family. Yet you guys mock her. I admit that I have done it before, but now I see it. Rachel cared deeply for each and every one of us in this room. Think back to it guys. Whenever we were down or troubled, who was the one person who cheered us up with a rousing song? Who was the person who took the time to listen to our problems and try to help in anyway she could? Rachel did that more than anyone else in this room. I hate to see you guys take Rachel for granted. Rachel is one of us, yet without a thought of any kind, she would be a friend to you, even if you treated her badly. Think about this the next time you think of making fun of Rachel. You guys can go. Glee rehearsal is canceled today."

Will watched as his kids shuffled out of the room. He could tears from the eyes of Quinn, Brittany, Mercedes, and Tina. The most surprising reaction of all was the tears coming from Santana. Finn walked up to him and thanked him as did Puck. It was a awkward moment for Glee, but Will knew that he had to do it. He had to defend Rachel this time. It was the right thing to do. As Will picked up the scraps of trash that they left in their seats, Will noticed Rachel's notebook in the doorway. It was strange that he found it there. Perhaps she dropped it on the way out? He didn't want to be nosy, but he was wondering if this was a journal Rachel wrote in. Perhaps it would detail her feelings and emotions during this tumultuous time. Will opened the notebook. He flipped through the journal, settling in on the last page. It was her last entry.

December 11, 2010

To the reader:

By now, you have probably found this notebook that I had intentionally left behind during rehearsal. Hopefully this is not the janitor reading, but if it is, please do not read any further and give this journal to any Glee club members. If you don't know any, please place this in the office of Mr. Will Schuester.

So where do I begin? I guess by the time you read this entry, I will already have departed from this world. Yes, this is Rachel Berry's goodbye letter. I know that I've been dreaming to be a huge Broadway star, but now that I realize it, being a Broadway star meant nothing to me if I'm not loved. Sure, my dads will be heartbroken, but they will probably be the only ones. Everyday, I feel as if I'm pushed to the edge. I contemplated ending my life before, but Glee club and Finn brought back to the real world. It gave me a hope, something to live for. You may notice my smile and my bright persona that I put on everyday, but sometimes, I believe you guys never realize that I am really hurting on the inside. I realize that being a star was only a byproduct of what I wanted. What I really wanted was to know that I was loved by other people and know that people care for me. I love each and every one of you, but it seems like you guys don't even care about me. You're always making fun of me, calling me names everyday. The fact that Finn, out of all the people I would least expect to, was joining in on the fun just made me realize that I am right about my decision.

You know the funny thing is I always imagined about my own funeral. What people will be there, what their facial expressions will be like…I've always thought that everyone would regret being cruel to me with Finn crying over my grave. But the truth of the matter is I honestly don't care now if anyone of you show up at my funeral. I'm not looking forward to it. When I die, at least I know I'm going to be among the stars. That's all I am looking forward to now, but before I go, I just have a few words for my fellow Gleemates.

Santana: Your insults hurt me the most, but I know that you are just like me. You're finding a place to belong. You don't want to be labeled the school's mattress. That's why you wanted a steady boyfriend and you tried to achieve that with Finn. Well, now that I'm gone, you could probably do that. I hope you'll find a guy one day (or a girl who knows). Whoever he or she may be, I hope they bring you happiness one day. But I want you to know, I do forgive you.

Quinn: I remember when we were friends in elementary school. We used to be the best of friends before high school entered our lives. Then you became a Cheerio and everything fell apart. When you were pregnant with Beth, I took the time to comfort you, especially after Coach Sylvester kicked you off the Cheerio squad. I helped you rebounded, and during that time, we rekindled our friendship and bonded together once again. Yet, I feel that this year, you've gone back to your old ways of being a Cheerio. I thought being kicked off the squad would show you some humanity, but it was only temporary. I hope you find it in your heart to be that girl who I once knew that showed her concern towards her fellow Glee members. If she'll come back, maybe I can die peacefully.

Puck: I didn't mean to cheat on Finn with you. I realized it was my dumb idea to begin with and I love the fact how much of a gentlemen you've become and you refused to take advantage of me during that moment. I am impressed. From one Jew to another Jew, I hope you find that girl, the one girl who will change your life forever, the one who will stop you from being such a ladykiller to all the girls in this school. At least, you know how to value a woman's heart now. I genuinely believe you have changed ever since you joined Glee club and I am glad to see that change.

Kurt: Can I say that you are such a diva? You and I both know that this universe, let alone this high school, cannot hold back the amount of star power we have. I have seen you grown from an insecure guy who was unsure of who he was to an eccentric, dazzling guy who expressed whatever he felt was on his mind. I have loved this great change within in you Kurt and I was very saddened to hear you leave McKinley High. I hope you'll come back. After I'm gone, the Glee club needs someone to replace my star power. And the only person who I find can do that is you.

To everyone else, I don't have enough time to write. Only for two people who I believe should hear what I have to say next. So if I forget any of you, it doesn't mean I don't love you. It means I don't have enough time. I love you all though. So, for the last two people.

Finn: I love you. And I want you to know what I did, I did for love. I was stupid when I decided to get back at you with Puck. It was stupid and I hope you forgive me for this. I was devastated when you broke up with me, but I realize it was my fault for cheating on you. I have to admit you did change me a lot. I wanted to become a better person after being with you. Hopefully you didn't view my divaness as not being a change in my life, but I assure you, Rachel Berry took a 180 degree turn. I've learned to care for others ever since you and I became an item. It took so long for us to be together and I thought we would last for a very long time, but we didn't. I think it was for the best though. I realize now this isn't what I want for you. I know there is some girl out there who is perfect for you. That girl isn't me, however. This girl will like you for who you are, just like me. She will love you no matter what you do. I'm sorry I can't be there for you, but from the bottom of my heart, I want to tell you how much I care about you. This is all I can say to you. I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me for what I've done.

Mr. Schue: You may be wondering why I saved you for last. Well, to tell you the truth. I guess it was because of the speech you made about me in class. I was outside, listening to everything you said about me and I thank you for that. To begin, I want to tell you that you're actually the only one who tried to bring out the best in me. I can hardly understand how you can tolerate me, though I suspect the time when you told me you had enough of my attitude, you only said that because of what you've been going through. I know you long enough to know that you wish to be with Miss Pilsbury (or rather Mrs. Pilsbury-Howell). I know she used to be your girlfriend and ever since she dated the dentist, you've been trying your best to win her back. She got married; now what are you going to do? Do you just leave your life in shambles? It's time, Will, to leave this behind you. You are our director. I don't want to see you in this place of heartache anymore. When you are down, this causes our Glee club to go along with you. You reflect us. We mimic you. So as a last wish, I want you to leave the thought of being with Emma behind and become our Glee director again. I want you to know that there are other women out there for you. I don't want the last thing to feel before I leave is my concern for your well-being. I want you to perk up and go find that woman of your dreams. She exists, trust me on this Will. Quit chasing after one girl who is always in an on/off relationship. That way, our Glee club won't suffer. You know, if there is any solace to be found in this bleak and depressing note, I don't regret being in Glee club. I don't regret knowing you Will because in some ways, our love lives are sort of the same. If anything could make me regret ending my life, it would be you. I want you to know that I love you Will. Before I die, I want you to know that. This is not your innocent little high school crush. I've loved you the moment I knew of your dedication to the Glee club. I fell in love with the man who pushed his students to be the best they can be. I want that man to come back. I want him to forget about his past romances. I know you don't feel the same way about me, but I don't regret this at all. Thanks for setting me free!

Mr. Schue, Finn, Quinn, Puck, Santana, Artie, Tina, Mercedes, Kurt, Brittany, Mike, Sam, and everyone else who have known me: I love you all.

Rachel Berry

PS: DO WELL AT NATIONALS! MAKE ME PROUD!

Clutching the suicide note of Rachel's, Will rushed out of the Glee choir room, forgetting about his personal belongings or even locking the door. Will didn't care as the teardrops poured from his eyes. The important thing was to find Rachel before she killed herself. Rachel doesn't realize the impact she had on the lives of others. God, the Glee club was beginning to regret making fun of her. If she killed herself now, the whole club will be devastated and they'll never be able to live with themselves. He had to find her before it was too late.

Thanks for reading my second story. For some reason, I always find good ideas with Will and Rachel. This will continue, but it won't be as long as my other story "Known Unknowns". Please check that out as well and comments guys! Much love.