Okay, so my friends and I were reading a Blindshipping fic and we kept on noticing how… stereotypic it was. After a few laughs, I decided to write a parody of it. So… this is a combo of parody with some crack mixed in.

Yuugi is a poor slave in the palace of Ancient Egypt. "Oh no!" he says, starting to cry. "I'm so poor and defenseless! I will never have the chance to experience love!"

Conveniently enough, Atemu is walking down the same corridor and they bump into each other(whether literally or not is up to the author, and since I am the author, it's literal). Yuugi tears up because bumping into someone hurts a lot… apparently…

"I'm sorry," he cries, not wanting to be punished for his clumsiness(because he's always punished, which… apparently makes him more desirable). He looks up to meet the "crimson orbs" of the Pharaoh.

"No, I wasn't looking," Atemu(because it is implied that you are supposed to know who has crimson orbs) replies.

It was love at first sight! The same time Yuugi thinks "He's so handsome! Too bad I'll never have a chance with him, because I'm a slave…", Atemu thinks "He's so sweet and innocent looking! I must have him! Of course, I will have him, because I am the Pharaoh!"

This is the part where the author's get lazy, because they are too eager to the sex over with and no one really cares about foreplay anyway.

So instead, the author tell things bluntly and the story goes along the lines of "They say each other's names, Atemu asks to fuck our poor, little Yuugi, who, for some reason, accepts. So, they went into the Pharaoh's room, which the author wastes two or three paragraphs describing the room's extravagance, which, let me tell you, really ruins the mood. They get on the bed and both of them automatically start to get horny."

"P-pharaoh!" Yuugi says in pleasure as Atemu does "naughty" things to him.

"No, call me Atemu," said Pharaoh purrs.

"Atemu!" - Yuugi is a very quick learner - "I need you inside me now!" Yuugi cries… yet again…

"But Yuugi, you're a virgin! If I enter you now, you'll rip!" Atemu replies, worried over the slave he fell in love with moments ago.

"I don't care, I need you in me now!" Yuugi demands. So out of the goodness of his heart, Atemu thrusts into Yuugi. Now, at this point you'd think that Yuugi is screaming from the pain and there's blood everywhere, right?

Well… not quite.

"OH GODS YES!" Yuugi exclaims as his prostate was hit directly(convenient, yes?). At this point, Atemu can no longer hold back because Yuugi is "so fucking tight" that he can no longer help himself. He thrusts deeply into Yuugi and more harshly as well. Of course, Yuugi doesn't mind. He's too busy screaming in pleasure… with tears rolling down his face, of course…

Now we get to the climax(because the writers are oh-so blunt about this). Yuugi comes first, because he is the uke and everyone knows ukes are the ones who are supposed to climax first, right?

"I LOVE YOU, YUUGI!" screams out Atemu as he comes after Yuugi. After the afterglow, tears come to Yuugi's eyes(yet again).

"Did you really mean that, Atemu?" Yuugi says disbelievingly. Atemu smiles down as his new lover.

"Of course, little one," Atemu says, adding the new pet name. "I love you, and I always will."

And you guessed it! Yuugi's eyes filled with tears of joy. "I love you too, Atemu!" he says and the too live happily ever after, totally ignoring the fact that Yuugi is a slave and Atemu is the Pharaoh and because of that, the likelihood that there would even be a happy ending would not be that practical.

Moral of the story, kiddies: Never forget the lube.

THE END

I had a lot of fun writing this story. Hope it made you guys laugh! ^^