Haagendaaz and Casablanca.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything is Stephanie Meyer's.

Oh, for goodness sake. I thought, walking through my door. The house was a mess and I didn't have energy to clean it today. When you see your boyfriend cheating on you all you want to do is sit, eat a few tubs of Ben & Jerry's and cry. I decided that was exactly what I would do, leave the clean-up for when I feel an inch better; which wouldn't be any time soon. I threw my keys onto the kitchen table, missing the flat wood by inches, and dropped my bag in front of the door leaving my jacket with it. I was officially going to declare myself depressed and the truth is, I am. I was completely gob-smacked when I walked in on him, lip-to-lip with Allie Scarve and I didn't even give myself enough time to fully evaluate the situation, just walked out the minute I saw them in that embrace. Anger wasn't the first thought that run through my head, it was instead hurt and disbelief and confusion. Just a week before he had promised I was the only one he'd ever needed so much and today it looked like he didn't need me that much, maybe he was heartless? No, he might have cheated on me but that didn't mean all my feelings changed to hate. I still loved him and the probability of that changing was highly unlikely. My first and only he had been and I was pretty peeved that he wouldn't be my first and only forever and always. I was halfway through a tub of Haagendaaz and halfway through Casablanca when I hear the door ring. I sighed and stood up out of my blanket, pausing the telly. Who now? I opened the door and saw him saw him stand there apologetically. My eyes started watering instantly and I tried to put distance between us.

"Bella, please, honey. Let me explain!"

I backed away from the door as he took a step forward, his arms reaching for me while he spoke.

"No! You do not call me honey, any more! Please, leave!"

I said quietly, trying hard not to shout, it barely being intelligible under my oncoming sobs. I pointed back to the door when he walked even closer to me, only a metre or two between us now. I couldn't bear this, my heart was already starting to ache again.

"Bella! Let me explain!"

He said, strained, almost as if he was mad, but from the softness of his voice, I could tell he wasn't. He was desperate; he wanted me to know his side. I straightened my back and held back what I could of my heartbroken cries. I waved my hand, waiting for his explanation, doubtful I would get a decent one.

"Explain. Explain it to me, why you left me neglected."

I said, challengingly. This pulled him up short. He paused and straightened his spine too.

"Bella. What you saw, it wasn't what you think! She-she was drunk, a-and I sat down to comfort her! She fell onto me, so I tried to lift her up b-but she kissed me! I-I tried to pull her back, but she held onto me! A-and then y-you came in! Bella! My lips only tingle under YOURS! I didn't even feel the slightest of what I feel with you in that 'kiss'! I-it wasn't even a kiss! She was drunk!"

He told me, stuttering and gesticulating the whole way through, trying to make me let go of the cliff I was holding onto and to fall into his arms. I cried and shook my head roughly while he explained, wanting to protest at each bit but not being able to speak over his dominant voice. I just cried, dragging my long, black, cotton sleeve over my face every few seconds to absorb the unending supply of salt water and mucus. He had closed the short space between us as he explained and now had me backed into a corner. I slid down onto the floor slumping against the wall, cold against my back. I pulled my knees to my chest and hid my face, still crying hysterically. I felt him kneel down beside me and hesitate to comfort me with his hands. I shook my hands and tried to push him up again but he consisted and sat down beside me, cross-legged.

"You don't love me, though! I'm not enough for you! Just go back to her!"

I sobbed. I wasn't sure if I wanted him to hear those words, so I said them so quietly, I myself, couldn't even fully understand them. I heard him groan in frustration and, although I squirmed uncontrollably when he embraced me, I didn't pull away. I just let myself whimper and cry there in his arms, which was even stupider. Wasn't I crying over him? Why was letting myself cry in the arms that were my enemy? I growled at myself as my tears came quicker. My cries were loud enough to be heard from outside, I guessed. Only a few seconds had gone and I turned around to squeeze myself into the corner of the room again, leaving his arms with a push I only JUST had the strength to muster. I held my breath for a few seconds, looking down at my slippers, afraid to catch my eyes in his solemn stare. I'd held my breath long enough to calm my cries, so now I could speak clearly. Daring to raise my voice higher than a feeble whimper I whispered,

"Can you please leave?"

I said politely and I heard him exhale calmly. He held the top of my arm in a gentle grip and, even when I flinched, didn't stop inching forward. His warm lips placed a soft and tender kiss to my cheek; I closed my eyes and resisted the urge lean closer to his lips, before he pulled away. My eyes opened and then I got caught in his green gaze.

"I love you, Bella; I'm not going to leave you."

He mumbled quietly. He stood up and moved himself further back from me, not letting his eyes drop from mine... His back was against the same wall as me and his arms held his knees in a loose grip. I closed my eyes and moved my head to face the wall, sniffing three times. I leant my head against the cream paint and just let small, pointless tears fall down my face. Sure, crying wouldn't help matters but it made me feel a tad better... I didn't who was going to start conversation between the two of us. Well, it sure as heck wasn't going to be me. He could just sit there for all I cared. I could hear his intake of breath every time he tried to say something, and then him just heave in exasperation. I picked at my nails and my teeth involuntarily chewed at my lip.

"Say something."

I heard him say, barely. My tears had faded with my sobs and now there was just a thick sheet in my throat. I swallowed.

"I'm not worth it."

"Bella, you have no idea how much you mean to me. I can't bear to see you cry, and for you to cry BECAUSE of me... Gah!"

He said, distantly. His small little moan at the end of it made me look at him and that got his eyes to focus on me. I dropped my eyes instantly.

"Look, Bella. I was annoyed at the fact she wouldn't leave me alone with her petty laughter so I tried to distract her, so I laughed with her hoping I could slip out of her sight when her attention caught something else, and when I was nearly there she ended up almost passing out. On me. I tried to sit her up but at one point her mouth was close to mine and she ended up kissing me. I didn't even respond and just when I'd gotten my hands on her shoulders to push her back you came in. I swear on my heart that was it."

He said, kneeling up. I didn't miss his reassuring. He smiled, barely, and slumped back against the wall. Minutes passed again without speech. He touched my hand and I pulled it away before I heard him sigh at the action. He kissed my forehead and stoop up after that.

"Just know it was you, Bella. It was always you."

And he left without another word. I watched him walk down the hallway and stairs shaking his head and heard the faint slam of the front door and rush of wind. I closed my eyes and rested my head on my knees. The tears came back again. I didn't sob this time, just silently let the tears fall in the corner of my room. So much for that fairytale Happily Ever After.

Authors Note:

Okay, just don't ask. I don't know what this is. The beginning started out as something completely different for a completely different character but the idea I was going to use it for didn't turn out too well. So, I've put them together and they sound very odd and very OOC and it IS very odd and very OOC because I haven't even tried or put any effort into this.

You know I love a review but I won't be surprised if I don't get anything for this one. It IS very crap. If you ARE reading this though, know I love you and the fact you still are is very much appreciated.

Yours Sincerely,

ColourMeChaos :) x