A/N: Thank you all for the reviews! Now I know you all are curious and anxious to see what happened Lucas and you will find that out in this chapter. This chapter picks up right where the last one left off :)
Oh and if anybody was wondering, Jameson looks exactly like a 3-year-old Jackson Brundage lol.
Chapter 3: Search for a Former Clarity
Running into the bathroom, Nathan could hardly hold himself together before retching into the nearby toilet. Lucas gone? He honestly couldn't fathom those two words in the same sentence. Lucas had been there for him no matter what and the fact that he was gone forever made it hard for him to breathe.
Gripping the marble countertop, he quickly splashed cool water on his face. He looked in the mirror, his face was pale and his blue eyes were distant and swimming in unshed tears. Turning away from his reflection, he sank down to the floor with his back against the cabinets.
"Nathan, what the hell were you thinking?" he heard his wife harshly whisper as she opened the door to the bathroom. "You know how Brooke gets when you bring up Luc..."
Haley stopped abruptly when she spotted her husband on the floor. He looked up at her and gave her a sad smile. Seeing his glassy eyes, she sunk down next to him and gave his bicep gentle squeeze. "What's wrong?" she asked softly, resting her chin on his shoulder.
He turned his head that was resting on his arms which were folded over his knees so he was facing her. "I just miss him." he said, giving her a sad smile.
Bringing her hand to his face, she wiped away the tear that lingered under his eye. "I know, baby, we all do." He nodded, looking straight ahead. "Nathan, what is going on with you? This morning you act as if you didn't even recognize Jame and now Brooke said you were acting like Lucas was still alive."
"I'm fine, just a little disoriented." he exclaimed, placing his hand on hers and rubbing her thumb across her knuckles.
"Are you sure? Maybe we should get it checked out. I'm just worried that it could be progressive and soon you won't be able to recognize me or remember about Ava." She rambled, looking down as her other hand coming to rest on her stomach.
He placed a finger under her chin, making her look at him. "No matter what I'm confused about or what I don't know to be true, I know one thing for sure. I love you Haley James and I will you and our beautiful children with all my heart until the day I die."
"You're wrong." she replied, biting her lip in attempt to hold back a smile. When Nathan looked at her in disbelief she continued. "You called me Haley James. It's Haley James Scott and it always will be."
A bright smile broke out across his face as he leaned in, covering her lips with his. "Yuck", they heard a small voice say. Turning towards the voice, they spotted their son standing in the doorway, holding a piece of paper. He couldn't believe that he hadn't realized before but Jameson really did resemble Lucas.
"What do you got there, Jame?" Nathan asked.
The little boy ran over to his parents and jumped into his dad's lap, emitting an "omph" from Nathan. "I drew you a picture, Daddy."
"You did?" he asked excitedly.
Jameson nodded, "Mhm, Aunt Brooke helped."
He handed the picture to Nathan and he couldn't help but smile. On the page was a scratchy drawing what he assumed was himself, holding a basketball.
"Thanks, buddy, I love it." he said, running his large hand over his son's blond head. The boy wrapped his little arms tightly around his father's neck as Nathan stood up. He offered Haley his hand, helping her up as well.
She rubbed a comforting hand up and down her sons back as she leaned into her husband. Nathan wrapped his free arm around her shoulders. "To me, this is perfect." he whispered in her ear, before kissing it.
"Whatta you say, Jame?" he said, bouncing the three-year-old lightly in his arms. "Wanna see how tasty Aunt Brooke's food is? We all know that it can't beat Mommy's but we'll give it a shot."
"My boy, the charmer." Haley smiled as they exited the bathroom.
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Walking into the kitchen after dinner, Nathan stopped in his tracks when he saw Brooke and Julian in a heated make-out session. She was on the counter and he was standing in front of her, their lips moving hotly against each other as her hands slipped under his open shirt.
He looked down and cleared his throat. The couple jumped apart, Julian quickly buttoning his shirt. "I'm sorry, I was just coming to see if you needed any help cleaning up dinner, but I see you guys already started on dessert. I'll just..." Nathan said, turning to leave.
"No, Nate you can stay", Brooke called. "Julian was just going to put the actual dessert on the table."
Nathan waited for the other man to get the pie and leave the room before moving towards Brooke. When he reached her he lifted her off the counter and placed her on the ground before enveloping her in his arms. "I'm sorry, Brooke. I never mean to upset you."
She hugged him back. "I know, bud. Are you sure you're okay?" she asked as she pulled away.
He sat at a stool that was positioned at the island and watched her as she continued to put the leftovers away. "If I tell you something, can you promise not to tell Haley?"
This made her look up from what she was doing and plant her hands on her hips. "Rule 1 of marriage, Nathan Scott, honesty first. You should know this, you've been married for five years."
"I know, I know. But if I tell Haley she'll worry and I don't wanna risk her stressing out with the baby."
"Alright", she agreed slowly as she placed the leftovers in the fridge.
"And I know this may sound crazy but you cannot commit me to mental hospital."
Cautiously sitting down on the stool next to him, she gave him a weary look. "You're starting to scare me, dude."
Taking a deep breath, Nathan began to twirl his wedding band around his finger nervously. "The reason I have been acting so weird today is because yesterday I wasn't married to Haley. In fact, before this morning I haven't seen Haley in eight years."
"What are you talking about?" she asked, giving him a confused look.
He sighed, trying to figure out how to explain this to her. "Yesterday, I worked and lived in the Upper West side of Manhattan, I was a successful, single business man. Until this morning, that was my reality."
"Okay, this is beginning to sound like Inception. You know how lost I was when you and Julian dragged me and Haley to see it..."
He was quick to cut her off. "Brooke, listen to what I'm trying to tell you. I don't remember Julian, in my world, you were married to Lucas."
This got her attention. Her face became solemn and her eyes filled with tears. "Why would you say that?" she breathed, clearly upset by his words.
"Because it's true!" he said loudly, trying to convince her. He continued, his voice quieter. "You were married to Lucas and Haley... Haley died eight years ago." Now the tears that filled her eyes began streaming down her face. "Please, you have to believe me."
Brooke brought her hand up to her chest as she struggled to catch her breath. "Were..." she began, but a sob got caught in her throat. He put his hand on her knee in hopes to give her some comfort. She took a deep breath and tried again. "Were we happy?"
"You and Luke?" he asked, she nodded. He took her hands in his and look her in her teary eyes. "So happy", he whispered.
"Did, did we have any kids?"
Nathan hesitated, "Brooke, I don't think..."
She cut him off. "Please, Nathan."
He nodded, "A little girl, Hope."
"Why 'Hope'?" she asked, wiping under her eyes.
"You, uh, you and Luke had trouble getting pregnant." he explained. She took in a fast, shocked breath. "What?"
"We never told anyone this but Julian and I had trouble conceiving Davis." she said matter-of-factly.
For the first time in the entire conversation, Nathan had a hopeful look on her face. "So, do you believe me?"
"I don't know" she began and Nathan hung his head. "But for the sake of conversation, let's say I do." He looked up expectedly.
"I just need someone to talk to so I can get this off my chest."
Brooke sighed, "Lay it on me." Nathan proceded to tell Brooke about what happened in his alternate universe and how he wound up here. She let out a pent up sigh at the end of his story. "Wow", she breathed.
"I'm saying", Nathan sighed, matching her tone. "Now, I know you don't like talking about Lucas, but can you fill in some holes for me?" She nodded. "How did he die?"
She took a deep breath before speaking. "He, uh, he had a heart condition..."
"HCM?"
Brooke nodded, glancing down at her hands. "Yeah, and he didn't tell anyone until one day he collapsed playing basketball and that was it." She looked up at Nathan who had a look of understanding on his face and she couldn't help the tears that started again. "I was, I was just so mad at him, but I missed him so much."
"This is all starting to make sense. In my world, once Haley died", he had to pause as the bone-chilling words left his mouth. "Once Haley died Lucas told everyone about his HCM and stopped playing basketball because he realized that life is fragile."
She caught onto what he was saying, "And because Haley never died he kept playing basketball and never got help for his HCM."
"Exactly."
"Nathan, you know this sounds crazy..."
He nodded. "I know, but I'm not making this up."
"Oh, I know. I don't think you could've made all that up."
Nathan grabbed the dish towel that was over her shoulder and gently wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Having Haley back is all I ever wished for but I'm sorry it meant you losing Lucas."
She took her friends hands and held them in her lap. "I love Lucas, I loved him with all my heart and if he didn't die there is no doubt in my mind that we would be married right now. But I love Julian and I truly think that he is the one I am meant to be with. He is my soulmate."
"I'm happy for you, Brooke, I'm happy that you found someone. God knows in the eight years after I lost Haley, no one even came close."
"You and Haley", she let out a breath and smiled, "are one of a kind."
He sighed jokingly, "Yeah, that's what I've been told."
Brooke smiled as her and Nathan both stood from their stools. "Let's go make sure that Haley and Julian aren't trying to dress Jameson as an elf."
"Again?" he asked, giving her a pointed look.
"Yeah", she laughed.
Throwing a friendly arm around her shoulder, he asked, "Are we the only sane ones?"
"Scary thought, huh?" Brooke responded as they left the kitchen to join the rest of their family.
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Walking up the staircase of his house, Nathan tightened his grip on his sleeping son. The sensation of Jamie's small breaths against his neck was one of the most heart warming feelings he had ever experienced. He could feel Haley playfully holding onto his belt as she walked up the stairs behind him. It were the little moments like this that made him believe that there was nothing else quite like this life. "So I was thinking", Haley whispered, "maybe you were disoriented this morning because of your fall on the court the other day. You did hit your head after all."
Wow, Nathan thought, the pickup games at the rivercourt must be getting rough if people are banging their heads against the concrete. "Maybe", he offered as an answer.
When they reached Jameson's room, Nathan gently laid him down on his bed before tucking him under his blankets and laying a soft kiss on his chubby cheeks. Haley stood in the doorway watching her two boys while running her hand over her swollen stomach.
"You're such a good father", she whispered as her husband approached her.
"You think?" He asked, rubbing her upper arms.
Sliding her hands around his waist, she slipped the tips of her fingers below the waistband. "I know", she emphasized as she pressed her lips firm to his. He brought his hands up to hold her face as he moved his lips over hers. "Come on", she whispered against his lips. "Christmas isn't over yet." With that, she took his hands and lead him out of the room and down the stairs.
xxxxxx
The room was dark except for the twinkling lights coming from the Christmas tree. Nathan and Haley were cuddled together on the couch with the soft sound of Christmas music floating from the speakers of the entertainment system. "This is my favorite part of Christmas." She hummed as she nuzzled closer into her husband's chest.
"Is that right?" he asked, laying a warm kiss on her forehead.
"Mhm, I love sitting here in the silence with you, hearing your heart beat." she said, slipping her fingers through the buttons of his shirt and drummed them in time with his pulse. Nathan nudged his nose against her forehead, trying to get her to look up at him. She obliged and turned her head to face him. As she did he tentatively moved his lips closer to hers.
Haley couldn't help the way her breathing accelerated as he inched nearer to her. His hand slid around her neck as his thumb gently rubbed her ear. She whimpered at his unbelievably slow pace. "Kiss me", he breathed, his warm breath surrounding her.
Not waiting any longer, she grabbed his head and crushed his lips against his. As he felt her tongue nudge his lips open, he grabbed the back of her knee and hitched it over his lap, pressing himself as close to her as her expanding stomach would allow. She moaned into his mouth as she felt his arousal growing against her thigh.
Getting a firm hold on his shoulders, Haley pulled herself up so now she was fully straddling him. The tips of his fingers dug into her hips as she breathed against his mouth, her lips parted slightly. "We can't do this right now." she panted, squeezing the back of his neck.
"Why not?" he asked, scraping his teeth along the chords of her neck causing her to press herself closer to him.
Her eyes found the clock on the wall. "It's almost midnight." She stated, threading her fingers through his hair as she continued to feel his breath against her neck. He pulled away from her and gave her a questioning look before remembering.
A large smile spread across his face as he recalled their Christmas tradition. Every Christmas evening they would exchange their hopes, dreams, and wishes for the next year. He looked up at the excited look on her face. "Would you like to go first?" he grinned.
She nodded enthusiastically. "Okay, I want Ava to be here, beautiful and healthy." She smiled moving her hand down to her belly, quickly being covered by Nathan's. "I want Jamie to be happy and the best big brother in the world. I also want to teach him how to read. And for you", she breathed, running her hand over his dark hair, "I hope you beat your scoring average, yet again. And I really want you to make the all star team this year and make all us Bobcat fans proud."
Bobcat? He was a Charlotte Bobcat? Nathan tried to hide the shocked expression that he could feel creeping onto his face. He couldn't believe it, he was in the NBA and he had Haley back. "Nathan", Haley said, breaking into his thoughts while laying a hand on his cheek. "It's your turn."
He shook his head and smiled as he looked up at her. "I already have everything I've ever wanted."
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Thanks guys! I hope you liked it!