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Chapter 1: Bella Barbie!

Bella stood staring at herself in the mirror. She didn't recognize the woman in her reflection. She used to be this shy young teen, who kept to herself, and was independent. Hell, she took care of her mother for years. She made all the decisions, paid the bills, kept Renee from killing herself in some foolish attempt at a good time.

Now she had all of her decisions made for her. What to wear, where she went, when she worked, who she hung out with. And she pretended not to care. To be fair, in the beginning, she didn't care. Just as long as she had him with her, Edward with her, she didn't care about anything else. She let him and his sister Alice mold her into what they wanted. A pliant friend and girlfriend, dressed how they wanted, acting how they wanted, doing what they wanted.

She followed whatever Edward said, every patronizing excuse he used she let roll off her back. He had been alive five times longer than her, surely he knew what was best? Every action he took, everything he did was for her wasn't it? To keep her happy and safe? Ever since she had gotten back from Italy, and the Cullen's had returned to Forks, she was just so happy, and relieved to have them all back, that she did whatever Edward and Alice asked of her.

She cut her hair, and added highlights because Alice said it had looked 'sloppy.' She threw out most of her wardrobe because Alice said it wasn't good enough for a future Cullen. She looked down at her left hand at the ring. She agreed to marry Edward after untold amounts of whining and badgering. Alice was taking care of all the planning; Alice had even picked out her dress. Sometimes she thought that maybe Alice should marry Edward. This whole thing seemed way more important to them than it was to her.

To her the idea of marriage so soon after graduating High School was horrifying. She felt bad whenever she was at the Cullen's talking or thinking about her wedding, and Jasper was in the vicinity. She could see the effect her emotions had on him. Her fear, her indecision, her urge to flee. Sometimes she would feel out and out panic. She was trapped, and there was no escape. But Edward was worth it right? Being with him and his family for all eternity was worth one little wedding, right? She could see Jasper struggling to block her feelings, her doubts, out. Bella had no clue how he managed to keep her emotions from Edward and Alice, but if they knew certainly they would say something?

She kept coming back to that day in the woods when Edward left her. He had lied to her, she knew that now. But did that make it any better? Did that absolve him of his sins in leaving her? Bella was starting to think it didn't. After all he broke his word to her. She didn't care that 'technically' he didn't break his word. He had said he wouldn't leave her 'as long as being with her was what was best for her.' Wording it like that in the first place was a dishonest manipulation in her eyes. To her it meant that he knew he would leave her some day 'for her own good.' He treated her like a child who didn't know what she wanted, who couldn't make her own choices. If he loved her so much, wouldn't he respect her opinions, and her wishes? Regardless of his profession of love throughout, how could he have broken her like that, so thoroughly, so completely, if she was it for him? If she was his mate, his forever, how could he intentionally hurt her, break her, so utterly?

An insane thought flitted through her mind. Did he brake her, like a horse is broken? Tear her down until her self worth is so non-existent that he could swoop back in, and build her up again in the manner he saw fit? The perfect little wife. Bella looked down at her dress. Alice had picked it out of coarse. It was designer, who she wasn't sure. It was made out of pink and cream tulle, draped around her upper body snugly, and on her left hip there was a spray of huge pink tulle flowers. The dress ended right above her knees, in a poufy froth of itchy material. The dress was light and fluffy, and she looked like the tooth fairy. Her shoes were kitten heels, thank the heavens, Alice had tried to get her to wear spiked, but had a vision of that not turning out well. Still they were covered in appliqué sequins and bedazzled with rhinestones. The dress might as well have been made out of lead for the weight it put on her shoulders. Her hair was curled into tight cork screws. She felt like a cross between Shirley Temple, Little Bo Peep, and the afore mentioned Tooth Fairy.

Tonight was her and Edwards engagement party. Her father Charlie had insisted on taking them all out to dinner at the Country club between Forks and Port Angeles. She had tried to talk him out of it, after all why waste so much money on fine food when none of the Cullen's would even be eating it? Her father didn't know they were Vampires of course, and insisted that since the Cullen's were paying for the Wedding that he would throw the Engagement party. She had a feeling she would enjoy this party more than the wedding. Her father, like her, was a simple man of simple tastes. The whole party would consist of dinner at the club, and the opening of a few presents. If only the wedding could be so simple and tasteful.

"Bella? Are you ready, love? We need to leave soon, or we'll be late." Called Edward through the door. Bella was in his bathroom trying to psych herself up for the party.

"I'll be out in a minute, Edward." She said back. She didn't need to raise her voice, he would hear her fine even if she whispered. Bella blinked at herself in the mirror, and was almost blinded by the sparkly eye shadow. Alice had done her makeup as well, and she looked like a two dollar hooker on New Year's Eve. All dark eyeliner, and glitter. She would have to stay away from any heat or open flame tonight: All the hairspray, glitter, and tulle would make her go up like a dried Christmas tree covered in napalm if she wasn't careful. Was it wrong of her to feel a spark of hope at the thought of burning to death? That was it, something had to give or she was going to go completely insane.

Bella took a deep breath, and turned to open the door. Here's hoping I can make it through tonight without pulling my, freakishly done, hair out. She thought.