Disclaimer: Naruto doesn't belong to me. Sad but true. The non existent fan book of tips - 'Ways To Join The Akatsuki' - is mine though.

Ways To Join The Akatsuki (In Fan fiction)

Chapter One - From AU to Ninja World

[The italics are the words from my *non existent* crappy fan book.]

To start this one off, you're going to have to create an OC. I suggest either an angsty teenage girl with the world's problems on her shoulders who needs an escape from it all, or an prep who learns something by becoming a ninja. Either way, they have to have very understanding parents - if they don't live with their parents and have no friends or a life, even better!

Whether you give them a Japanese or non-Japanese name is completely up to you. Be sure to give them a personality that isn't boring or Mary Sue-ish…Unless you adore flames. Then you can go for it!

This way of doing things also opens up the beautiful 'OC x *Insert Random Akatsuki Member's Name Here*' story. Deidara and Sasori appear to be popular choices, but that doesn't mean you can't go for someone like Hidan or, um, Kakuzu - whatever floats your boat!

Now let's have an example!

"Oh Kami-sama, my life is soooooo boring and stressful!" Fifteen year old Yami flopped back onto her bed, her blonde hair flowing around her. "If only it turned out that my parents signed a contract with some unknown and completely unexplained force to send me into this world for fifteen years and that in a few minutes a porthole will open allowing me back to my actual life where I'm a ninja, and where I shall be forced to become part of a criminal organization and eventually fall in love with one of them, only adding stress to my new life." Standing up, she sighed. "But that is completely and utterly impossible, and will definitely not happen in a million years."

Her bookcase shuddered suddenly, books falling to the floor. Yami walked over to it. "Oh no, I wonder what happened! How stressful!"

The bookcase shuddered again, and the blonde jumped back just in time to see it topple over, revealing some sort of circular glowing thing behind it.

"What the hell?" She questioned, eyeing it carefully. "Ah what the heck, I'm just going to dive straight into it with no regard for the consequences." And with one small run up, she did so, screaming for her life.

Her ears hurt slightly, but it didn't matter as in no time at all she was splayed out on a cold, stone floor.

"Ah, so this is the girl we were promised."

"Fifteen years is a long time…"

"You're so f*cking impatient it's untrue."

"Where am I?" Yami cried out, jumping up quickly and shooting suspicious glances at everyone in the room.

"You're in the Akatsuki base. Your parents signed a contract with some unknown and completely unexplained force that sent you into an alternate world for fifteen years. However a few minutes ago, a porthole opened allowing you back to your actual life where you're a ninja, and where you shall be forced to become part of this criminal organization," an orange haired man explained, stepping into the blonde's line of vision.

Yami grinned widely and nodded. "Oh well, that's fine then!"

"You're not going to protest?"

"Hell no mister!"

"…Welcome to the Akatsuki."

"This is amazing! And to think my parents gave up everything to save me for an issue that would become apparent in later chapters if this wasn't a crappy one off being used as an example to a story about joining the organization I am now a part of!"

"Yeah…Just cut the bull already." A silver haired guy complained.

"Isn't this the part where the OC gets a crush on someone?" A blue haired woman asked in a monotone, glancing around at the lucky guys up for the job.

Yami also glanced around. "Aw crud, nothing for it! I'll just do it in the most logical way possible! Eenie meenie minee mo, catch a sailor by the toe-"

"Isn't there something else you can insert there, un? That seems so childish."

"Deidara shut up."

"That's rude to senpai!" (AN: Yes, both Tobi and Sasori are in this story. Isn't the normal reason something like Sasori was resurrected by some super cool life force and as a result was allowed to return to the Akatsuki? No? Well tough shizz, that's what happened here.)

"Okay, done!" Her finger has fallen on Zetsu. "He's so cute! His form makes him look like a human but a plant at the same time! Yayz and so on."

And so, the story continues from there, with everyone prancing and prating around, being completely out of character. How wonderful for all involved.

As you saw, I did all the necessary things for that to be passable. The OC accepted everything without question, some romance was worked in and there was a quite long authoresses' note in the middle of the story, explaining something I could've said at the start or end.

Also notice the subtle hints I gave to show she'd join the Akatsuki: her life was full of stress - although that stress wasn't explored, so we're not sure if it even existed - and her name was 'Yami', which means dark in Japanese. Like, duh.

More tips next chapter!

End

I mean no offence with this, let's make that clear right now. It's crack. And I enjoy reading OC/Akatsuki stories.

As for the ways you can get OC's to join the Akatsuki, I find many of them to be creative. I'm not attacking them, just offering a spin on things.

If you don't like it, don't read it. I'll accept constructive criticism, but I don't want some randomer flaming me for taking the piss or whatever. Just so we're clear (:

With all that out the way, drop me a review! See ya!