Disclaimer: I own nothing, all the characters © Akira Toriyama

Couple: Vegeta x F! Goku

Warning: Contains blood, death and sex. Can't stand it, do not read this story!

A/N: In this story Goku is a girl. Gohan has a father who Goku met at a party and which was not supposed to be more than a one night stand. Chi-Chi and Goku live together in a common house where they take care of Gohan together. As for Vegeta and Bulma they are together and have had Trunks together for some years. If there is anything else that you do not understand or just want to ask, do not be afraid to ask!

All was quiet on planet Namek. The only thing that could be heard was the wind rustling as it flew past the six people who stood in a circle around each other. Or, five of them stood. The last of them lay still on the ground with his eyes closed. He had been murdered by one of the five people who stood around him.

Vegeta, the Saiyans Prince, was dead.

Goku looked down with sad eyes at the young man's body that since for only a few seconds ago had been living. As for just a few seconds ago had spoken to her and lifted out all the grief that he had held within himself for so many years.

"Kakarott, you have to kill Frieza for me, my father, your father and for all the Saiyans sake who gave their lives to protect our home planet Vegeta. You have to kill him..." had been Vegeta's last words in life and they had touched Goku not only because of the message in the words, but that Vegeta had cried during the entire time he talked. Tears of anger against the creature that killed his father, grief at the loss but also tears of disappointment against himself because he hadn't been strong enough to defeat the monster that had terrorized him since he was a little boy.

"Vegeta, you and I are not exactly the best of friends, but I respect you and your pride. I promise you that I will do everything I can to avenge your father and my father, and all the other Saiyans that appeared during Frieza's evil. For my people's pride, I will beat this monster. Do not worry, Vegeta."

Goku laid Vegeta down in a little hole and then put dirt over him, which she at this moment was the closest of be calling a grave. In this way Vegeta was also more protected against her and Frieza's attacks. If Vegeta would be resurrected to life Goku wanted his body to be in as good condition as possible. That she was guilty Vegeta.

A feeling of deep sadness washed over her as she stood looking down at the grave she had done over Vegeta. He and she were of the same race, but now there was only one of them left. Sure, Gohan was halfsaiyan, but it was not the same as she and Vegeta. Unless Goku could not find another Saiyan who for some reason had survived, Goku would be the only surviving Saiyan left.

Goku clenched her hands and felt how an anger took over her. She looked at Frieza who looked back at her with a grin on his face. "Finally he stopped talking. It started to really get on my nerves."

Now Goku could feel how her anger only grew bigger. So, Frieza thought it was just to come here and take over this planet? For what reason? Killing innocent creatures who could not even make the slightest resistance, and to have eternal life? Only someone who was really evil could do such a thing as Frieza was trying to do.

What he did not know was that Goku was about to stop him, even if she would die while trying. No one came and hurt her friends without having to bear the consequences; it was what Goku had promised herself ever since she was little. Especially against those who thought they were better than others and who lived only to kill.

Just as Vegeta... she thought. Suddenly it hit Goku that she had made an exception in her promise. Vegeta was the only one who hadn't really taken the consequences of his actions. Actually, he should not even be on this planet, just because many of her friends had thought she should have put a stop to him on earth when they first met. The only problem with that was that Goku could not bear the thought of that Vegeta was going to die because of her... Deeply buried in her heart there was a voice that told her that Vegeta had not always been the kind of person he was today. Somewhere deep in his heart there was something that tried to get out, something that was not as evil as Vegeta tried to show others that he was. Actually both he and Goku knew that Vegeta deep down was kind, at least good. He had just become like this because of Frieza...

"I will not forgive you for all the damage you have done to this planet and its people, Frieza. You are evil, I can feel that. I am here to ensure that you get to pay for all those who have fallen under your evil. Especially my father, Vegeta's father and our home planet Vegeta! I could never forgive you for what you did to my family!" Goku cried and felt how all the pain that she had been seeing in Vegeta before he died, seemed to melt into her and give her strength.

Without no doubt she flew up against Frieza and began the battle that she only gradually realized was a battle for revenge, pride, honour and love...

Goku screamed and sat straight up in the bed. She was drenched with sweat and her heart pounded hard in her chest. Her breathing was heavy and tiring. It took a while before she realized she had only dreamed it all. The problem with the dream was just that it was not a dream, it was rather a memory.

A bad memory, which she just wanted to forget.

Tears ran down her cheeks and she let them pour. The sight of Vegeta's crying face was still stuck in her memory, though it had gone so many years since the incident. Today Vegeta was feeling good and had his own family together with Bulma, her best friend. Luckily, they had managed to wish Vegeta back to life with the dragon balls which had existed on planet Namek.

Ever since that horrible day when Goku had thought that Vegeta was lost forever, it had seemed as if she and Vegeta had came each other a little closer, or was it just as she imagined? When she thought about all the times they had been alone after the incident on Namek Goku had several times felt that they understood each other better now than they had done before.

"Vegeta ..." she whispered to herself and looked out the window at the sun that was coming up. The sight made her feel a little better, but just a bit.

With resolute face Goku stood up and took off her pajamas as she had slept in. Before she went into the bathroom, she stood naked in front of the big mirror which stood diagonally across from her bed. Scars covered her body, some more obvious than others. She had constant breasts that any guy would most likely be able to drool over. Actually, Goku wasn't dissatisfied with her body, but it had been so long ago since someone touched it that she had started to doubt her appearance. She remembered all the nights she had to make it good for herself at the lack of a partner. Something that she did not want to admit to herself was that many times during these nights; it had been Vegeta's face she saw before her and she had pretended that it was Vegetas hands that made her feel good.

He was so handsome ... Goku understood if Bulma had decided to take Vegeta to her own, it was a really good decision. At times, Goku couldn't stop it, but a small stitch of envy crept in when she at the very least wanted or expected it. She did not know if it was because she wanted Vegeta to herself, or if she was just jealous that Bulma had someone, and not her.

With a sigh Goku shook her head and went into the bathroom where she stood in the shower. The warm water washed away the last of the nightmare and made her feel a little better. Quickly she made herself ready and putted on her normal cloths, which consisted of orange pants, a blue t-shirt and on top of that an orange sleeveless shirt. In her arms she had, as usual, a pair of blue sweat band, the feet's were covered by a pair of blue shoes, and finally a blue sash around her waist that would keep both the pants and shirt on the spot.

"Ready to take off", she smiled and opened the window wide open. The morning air welcomed her as usual, with its warm breeze. Goku's mood step up yet another notch and made life a bit easier to live.

Without hesitation, she flew out of the window and left the house she shared with her son Gohan and friend Chi-Chi. Chi-Chi, yes... Goku did not know what she would have done if she had not had Chi-Chi to help her raise her son.

Something that Goku never really had forgiven herself for was that she had not tried harder with Gohan's father. He had been a one night stand, as it was called. When Goku discovered she was pregnant, she had contacted Gohan's father and told him what was going on. To her chagrin, he had not wanted to have anything to do with either her or Gohan. Of course, she had not given up after that first time, but after the fourth time she realized that there was nothing she could do about it. She was nothing more than a fuck for him, which had made her sad, but the sadness had soon turned into anger.

Gohan knew who his father was, but he said that he did not see him as his father after what he had done to his mother. "Do not worry about me, Mom. I'll be fine; I have you and Chi-Chi. She is like a father to me, and you know it", Gohan had said once when Chi-Chi hadn't heard it.

"You are strong you Gohan, stronger than I first thought." Goku could feel tears trying to escape from her eyes again, but she forced them to remain inside her eyes.

Soon she had reached her destination. Bulma's house, Capsule Corp., was located just beneath her and she concentrated on the feeling of Vegeta's energy. To her surprise, Vegeta was not in his training room, but inside Capsule Corp. itself. It was something that almost never happened, Goku had been told from Bulma. For the most parts Vegeta was in the training room or out in the nature somewhere where he did not have to worry about being disturbed by other people. "What he's doing there", Bulma had once said to Goku, "is probably to train."

Goku hid her energy and flew closer to the house where she could hear the sound of voices. Quickly, she realized that it was from Vegeta and Bulma's bedroom, which also should mean that it was Vegeta and Bulma she heard.

She flew closer and could now hear well enough to hear what the couple was saying. Or maybe it was the wrong word to say, they rather shouted at each other. Goku did not know what had started the quarrel, but by what she heard it sounded as if Bulma was dissatisfied with Vegeta.

"You are never home; you just disappear as soon as you wake up and train somewhere! You never have time for your son or me, everything is just about to get stronger and defeat Goku, right?!" Bulma screamed with angry voice.

"As if you could understand anything, woman!" Goku could hear Vegeta's voice say back. "I am a Saiyan; this is what my nature tells me to do! I was born to fight, so why should I not try to become stronger? Or do you want me to become weaker and let you die because I am not strong enough to protect you and Trunks?"

It became silent for a moment and Goku took the chance to peep through the window she was standing under. What she saw was Bulma and Vegeta standing in front of each other with facial expressions that were anything from smooth. It was as if lightning bolts flew out from their eyes and tried to compete as to whom was the strongest. Goku realized that this could only mean that she just had been stomping right into a fight that was none of her business.

"I can understand the notion in that it is in your nature and so, but every day?" Bulma said. "Don't you care about neither me nor your son at all anymore? In recent times it feels as if you have been avoiding us on purpose, Vegeta. Is that so?"

"You talk as usual nothing else but crap, woman. Of course I care about my own son, he is after all a Saiyan, right? It's just that..." to both Bulma's and Goku's surprise Vegeta hesitated over what to say next. What had really happened to Vegeta? He would never hesitate when he spoke. He always knew what he wanted to say, and if he didn't he just walked away from there.

"I've had other things to think about, okay?" said Vegeta in the end and the sentence made Goku really think.

What was it that weighed Vegeta so? He that never seemed to have problems with anything. As he had said many times himself: "A Saiyan Prince like me, do not have time to worry."

"Oh, and what can it be then, if I may ask? Do not come here and say that you have met someone else, Vegeta. I can not imagine another women wanting to have you anyway, you are so mean to everyone and everything." A laughter filled the room Bulma and Vegeta was standing in. "There is probably not anyone in this place that can satisfy you, right? How long ago was it you and I last slept with each other? Weeks, months? I am no good for you anymore, right? You want something new. Your Saiyan instinct tells you that you must find 'new blood'. You and Goku are the only Saiyans left, which means that another person almost just like you isn't so big, right?" As soon as the words slipped out of her Bulma became silent, as if she had come to think of something.

Vegeta said nothing, just looked sour at Bulma. Without saying another word he walked out of the room, leaving Bulma behind with her mouth open.

Quickly, so Vegeta wouldn't notice her, Goku flew away and hid some meters away from Capsule Corp. After a while she could see Vegeta wearing his Saiyan armor. He quickly flew away, and Goku decided to follow him. It was one thing she just had to find out after all that she had heard.

Could it really be that... Vegeta no longer loved Bulma? Were they going to get a divorce, and did it mean that she had a chance to get Vegeta to understand how she felt about him? So many times that she had dreamed of Vegeta, it seemed impossible that she might at last be able to have her dreams fulfilled.

Suddenly, Goku could feel Vegeta's energy rose and become increasingly angry. It must mean that Vegeta had reached his destination and had now started training. A smile spread across her face as she felt how the Saiyan blood in her body began to explode with excitement over a good workout. What Vegeta would think about the idea she did not know, but there was nothing she cared about right now.

When the moment seemed to fit Goku jumped out from her hiding place and took a firm grip on Vegeta's arm before she threw him away. To her joy Vegeta was really surprised at the attack. Soon, however, he grinned and then attacked her, just what she wanted him to do. "Hey Vegeta, it was a while ago. I almost started to believe that you are avoiding me on purpose."

"Kakarott, what a surprise. I did not believe that you were so eager to fight", was Vegeta's response. A kick made Goku off balance for a while, which was all Vegeta needed to get the upper hand.

Vegeta flew against Goku and gave her a punch in the face that got her to fly away a bit but just as quickly she was on her feet again. "Kamehameha!" she screamed and a blue, giant beam of light flew out from her hands towards Vegeta that blocked it by sending out the same beam of light, but a yellow one.

A big explosion shook the ground and when the dust had gone away Vegeta couldn't see Goku anywhere. He felt her presence and knew she was close and therefore standed himself in a fighting pose. It did not take long until Goku came flying at full speed towards him and was just about to give him a kick in the back when Vegeta turned around and grabbed her foot. He whirled her around for a while and then let her go and followed her when Goku flew through the air.

When he was alongside Goku Vegeta quickly took a grab of Goku's arm that he pressed up behind her back, and then put his other arm around her throat. Vegeta pushed up his arm against Goku's neck, causing Goku to lose concentration even more. Not that Vegeta pushed so hard, he did not want to kill her, but it was enough just to feel his body press against hers to get her to become even more distracted.

Vegeta also seemed to notice that something was wrong, because soon he let go of Goku. Rather than attempt a new attack, he only looked at the Saiyan in front of him. What was wrong with Kakarott today? Such an attack would not normally have worked on her. Why was she so distracted?

Goku looked down at the ground and felt how much she was ashamed. Why should this happen to her now? How would she explain this to Vegeta? Her brain was totally empty; all she could see was Vegeta's body that pressed against her own. She realized first now that the only thing that meant anything to her was her son Gohan and Vegeta.

Vegeta, The Prince of all Saiyans, was the only person who could make her whole.

"Kakarott, what is it?" Vegeta stood with his arms crossed over his chest and with one eyebrow rose, which always meant that Vegeta was either sour or wondering.

"It is nothing... special, Vegeta. Do not worry about it. I shall probably go and..." Goku turned around, but before she could fly away, she felt how a hand was laid on her shoulder. "Did you not hear what I just said? Leave me alone!"

Quickly Goku ran in her elbow in Vegeta's stomach and then kicked him in the chest so that he flew several feet's before he regained balance. When Vegeta stood upright again, it was not an angry glance which met Goku's, but rather a thoughtful one.

"Stop playing, Kakarott. I see that there is something, and do not try to wriggle yourself out of it. If I must, I will force it out of you." Vegeta walked slowly towards Goku to not scare her. Whatever it was that bothered her, Vegeta realized that if he should get anything from Kakarott it would not be by violence, as he otherwise was accustomed with.

"Kakarott, please." Vegeta sighed and shook his head. In an attempt to get Goku in a better mood, he grinned and got something tantalizingly in his eyes. "Do not say you are afraid!"

It had the opposite effect of what Vegeta thought would happen. In most cases, Goku would just have laughed, but now she was quite angry. Vegeta saw to his amazement how Goku began to raise up her energy and how she got something crazy in her eyes.

"Oh, is that how you look at me, Vegeta?!" she screamed. "Am I just some sort of toy for you, or? Bulma was right; you seek only to become stronger so that you might one day win over me, right? But you know what?! It will never happen!"

"How can you know what Bulma thinks about me? Wait, do not say it was you who..." Now Vegeta understood what Goku was talking about. She had heard his and Bulma's argue earlier. What an idiot he was, it was obvious, if he just thought a little more about it.

"Yes, I listened to you two. At first I thought that you might actually feel something for me, but it looks like I was wrong. Very wrong." The cold tone in Goku's voice got Vegeta to back away a step or two.

"Kakarott, you've got it all wrong. Listen to me for a while so I can explain everything..." Vegeta began, but was soon interrupted by Kakarott's fists that came rushing towards him in a rage that Vegeta had never seen in Kakarott before. Kakarott was the kind of person who was always calm and never freaked out, not for the slightest thing like this, anyway.

"Shut up, Vegeta!" Goku raised her power even more and hit harder against Vegeta.

Vegeta managed to parry the blows, mostly because Goku just was beating out of pure insanity, instead of actually aiming for Vegeta. Her feelings were in disarray, and this made that her concentration had fell drasticly.

"Kakarott, calm down! Listen instead, violence will not solve this." Vegeta grabbed Goku's arm and that led her to a halt. "Talk to me, I see that it is something."

To Vegeta's great surprise Goku began to cry. The tears streamed down her cheeks and she could not stop them. Without that she understood how it happened, she had told everything that she had kept in for so many months. The concern for Gohan, how his father did not want to know anything about him, the loneliness she felt and even the jealousy that raged within her as soon as she saw or thought of Vegeta and Bulma.

"You and Bulma are at least together. Who do I have? No one. No one who can keep me warm at night and give me the kind of love that only a partner can. I can't remember how long it has been since last that someone else has touched me, Vegeta. It is about to kill me, I'm so tired of having to be alone!"

Vegeta listened carefully to Kakarott and when she was finished, he looked into her eyes. His hand was lifted up and wiped away the tears from Kakarott's eyes. A sense of community hit Vegeta and suddenly he understood. All that Kakarott just had told him where his own feelings. How long had it been since he and Bulma last had had an intimate contact? They had just slipped further and further away from each other after Trunk's birth. It was not that he did not love his son, because he did even if he did not show it all times.

To tell the truth he and Bulma had not had it so good for months, and both of them knew it. None of them had wanted to realize it however, which probably would have been the reason why they fought so much nowadays. They did not know any other way to communicate about things anymore, because they didn't have anything to say to each other.

Without saying anything, Vegeta laid his hands around Goku's cheeks, which caused her to fall silent. They watched each other's eyes for a long time without saying anything, they did not know what to say. Their eyes said everything that really needed to be said. She showed how she felt about Vegeta, and he showed how lonely he really was.

That was when Goku realized she had been wrong all the time. Bulma and Vegeta hadn't it good at all, although it could appear that way on the outside. Bulma could no longer satisfy him just as she had done before. The insight got Goku to feel terribly ashamed, how had she managed to be so stupid that she had not noticed it before?

"Vegeta, I..." Goku began but Vegeta silenced her by putting his finger on her lips. The movement got Goku's heart to beat harder where it lay in her chest.

Vegeta stroked Kakarott's hair with the other hand. The feeling of Vegeta's hand against her hair caused her to calm down. Her body relaxed and she closed her eyes. The only thing that excisted was her, Vegeta and his movements.

Before she realized what was about to happen Vegeta's lips were pressed against her own. Goku opened her eyes and stared into Vegeta's dark brown. What she saw in them was something she never thought she would see.

A lust against herself. Vegeta wanted her, and that now.

The feeling struck her with such force that Goku did not have time to think what would happen after this. Quickly she whispered to Vegeta that they could go home to her because they would be alone there.

With a grin Vegeta nodded and the two Saiyans flew quickly back towards Goku's house. Once there, Goku shut the window behind her and pulled the curtains over it. If there was something she didn't want it was that someone other than her and Vegeta would find out what was going to happen between them.

Before she could turn around Goku felt Vegeta's hands around her waist. His lips folded around her neck and the feeling it gave her made her moan low. Now that her dream had finally become reality, she wanted to enjoy it as much as possible.

Quickly Vegeta's hands found their way around her belt and untied it. Soon even her clothes disappeared from her torso. She now only wore a black bra on her upper body and the view got Vegeta to grin in a way that told Goku that he liked what he saw. His hands folded around the bra and began fondling her breasts slowly while he continued to kiss her neck. Goku moaned louder, she could not help it.

Just that Vegeta was standing so close to her made her so excited that she thought she would explode. She realized that Vegeta had done this many times before and knew what was expected of him. It was not long until Goku's bra lay on the floor next to her other clothes. Vegeta turned her around and looked into her eyes before he bent down towards her now naked breasts.

What followed seemed like a dream. Never before had Goku felt so alive, so needed that Vegeta made her feel. It was as if he could interpret her body signals perfectly, because as soon as she thought of one thing Vegeta did just what she had wanted him to do in her thoughts.

Slowly Vegeta let his lips kiss Goku's hard nipple while he stroke her other breast with his hand. He could feel how Goku shook of satisfaction and it made him understand that he was doing it right.

"Kakarott, you are so sexy..." Goku heard Vegeta say between her breasts and it made her shiver.

Without any warning Vegeta lifted her up and laid her down on the bed where he looked down at her for some seconds before he grinned and crawled down to her stomach. He gave her small kisses before he let his tongue stroke over her clitoris. Goku moaned low and bend her under body against Vegeta's tongue.

God, so nice! Vegeta was truly good at this. She was a bit worried over that she would come before Vegeta had pushed himself inside her, but she didn't need to worry. Just before she came Vegeta lifted his head and gave her a kiss that deepened more and more. Goku felt it as if her body would soon explode from all the pleasure Vegeta managed to get up from her very core. She wanted nothing more than to feel Vegeta inside her.

Just as she wanted Vegeta grinned and pressed himself into her at last. The feeling it gave got Goku to scream of pleasure. Never before had any man or woman made her feel as wonderful as Vegeta. By all the happy feelings that surrounded her, she managed to magically look Vegeta in the eyes and interpret his facial expression. What she saw in it was the same desire as she felt at that moment and it made her smile.

Vegeta smiled back and then started kissing her again. Their bodies seemed to move by themselves, they felt of each other's movements and they seemed to adjust after that. The feeling made both Goku and Vegeta to moan loudly with pleasure. Both had been so frustrated and alone for so long that they now seemed to take out all that stuff at each other.

When the two reached their climax the time seemed to stop completely. Nothing else existed except the two of them; it was only them and their desire. They were the last two Saiyans, but right now, they did not feel like it. They were just... Goku and Vegeta, two lovers who have just shared a love meeting.

"Vegeta, I love you. I have done that ever since that day on Namek when I thought you were lost forever. I didn't know it until much later, but when the instinct finally hit me, I stopped seeing other men or women. Nothing else existed except you, Vegeta. I started dreaming about you, even when I had my private moments; I imagined that you were there with me." Goku stroked Vegeta's hair with slow movements.

At first, Vegeta was silent. Goku knew it was a lot to take in, so she let Vegeta take his time. "I understand, Kakarott. I did not understand my feelings for you until after that I got Trunks. Sure, I was glad that I had gotten a son, but when I saw him lying on Bulma's chest it was your face I saw before me, not Bulma's. Then I realized that Bulma could not satisfy me forever, she was simply too... human."

Vegeta looked up at Goku and kissed her gently. Goku replied the kiss while tears ran down her cheeks. To hear Vegeta admit he had had feelings for her that long made her happy. It made her also feel that they just had come each other even closer after what had just happened between them.

Goku knew that from now on she would never feel lonely or need to cry herself to sleep because the love she wanted wasn't within reach. Those days were over now, and the relief that followed felt like it would strangle her.

"Promise me you'll never leave me, Vegeta. I would never be able to live alone again." Goku looked at Vegeta who sat up. She put her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

One arm was laid around her shoulders and she smiled. "I promise you, Kakarott. I have too long had to put up with the feeling that I never will find an equal, but now that I finally found her, I won't let her go so easily."

Before they both fell asleep with their arms around each other, they promised each other never to leave the other while they both lived. They promised each other eternal love, too, because none of them wanted to lose the other. They loved each other too much to ever be able to separate from each other.

Because once you listen to your heart and its feelings, one finds that miracles really can happen.