1.

A/N: I SHOULD NOT be doing this. I've got schoolwork galore, three other stories I haven't finished and a social life to fit in there somewhere. But screw it. Also, have another one planned about holidays, comments are love.

Also also, Sherlock cross-dresses in the next chapter, so stay tuned.

ND

Mycroft had physically forced them onto the plane, and Sherlock was in the process of booking them a ticket back under a false name using Mrs Hudson's credit card details. John sat back in his seat, furious that he was missing at day at work; he could really use that money. They were in first class (surprise, surprise) and pretty girls in tight skirts kept catching his attention.

Sherlock could of course see this and with every glance John made he frowned a bit more.

"Stop it, John." He said suddenly, as they were taking off. John had just accepted an alcoholic beverage from a woman whose breasts were tumbling out of her top.

"Stop what?" John stuttered, guilty.

"Stop looking at the women when I'm right next to you!" he whispered.

"Jealous?" grinned John. Oh, Sherlock would make him pay.

"No, I've just got something better for you to look at." And with that he unzipped his pants and did something that is 'frowned upon' on aeroplanes.

"Sherlock!" John hissed. "Sherlock, stop masturbating in public."

"Why?" asked Sherlock, scrunching up his face.

"People don't want to see you masturbating!"

Sherlock assumed a hurt expression and covered himself with the blanket.

"If you didn't want to see me masturbate you could have just said so."

John sighed, leaning forward and putting his fingers to the bridge of his nose.

"I do want to see you masturbate, Sherlock, just not now. Masturbating is a private thing."

Sherlock of course, knew that.

"Okay!" he said brightly, "I'll go to the bathroom! Want to come and watch?"

John was pretty sure the people behind them had heard the whole conversation. He shook his head silently. Sherlock pulled his jumper over his erection and waddled to the toilet. When he got there, he leaned against the bench and waited. The toilet was tiny. Both of them would only just fit. Sherlock licked his lip in anticipation.

It was ten minutes before the hard rapping of John's fist signalled his resolve had dissolved.

"Occupied." Sherlock called, and John rapped again.

"Oh, John, is that you?" Sherlock feigned surprise. "Do you want to come in?"

"Yes." John said quietly. Sherlock unlocked the door and John stumbled in as quickly as he could.

He sat down on the toilet seat nervously.

"Hurry up."

Sherlock, tired of his game, smirked and began to run his fingers down his cock, watching John's face.

"Take of your shirt, John." He said in a low voice. John pulled the polo over his head. Sherlock pumped faster.

"Suck on your fingers and run them down my chest." Sherlock said in a very, very, very low voice. He was losing control now, but it didn't matter because John was here. He could afford to lose control.

John did as he was told, and they were very close now. Sherlock watched John carefully, his breaths coming as little puffs. He leaned into John's neck, wheezing, as John took and arched as he finally reached release.

As soon as he was coherent again, Sherlock let out a deep, sneering laughing. John sighed.

"I walked straight into your little trap, didn't I?"

"Yes." Sherlock said in a slow, deliberate and mocking voice.

"And you knew I would."

"Yes." That same voice.

"And you've been planning this since I asked if you were jealous."

"Yes. Well done John, three out of three!" Sarcasm.

"Doesn't matter though, Sherlock."

"I know it doesn't."

"Because I'm not the one covered in my own semen."

Sherlock hadn't thought of that. John could tell by the lack of immediate reply.

"I didn't have to lure my boyfriend into an aeroplane toilet; I didn't have to beg him to rub his saliva on me."

Sherlock rolled his eyes.

"Doesn't matter though, John. The point of this little escapade was to remind you that your boyfriend is better than any of the girls out there. And more daring, if my deductions are correct – and they are. Also, you didn't seem to mind, judging by the state of your pants."

There was a spreading wet patch at the front of John's jeans, which occupied them for the rest of the plane ride. And then they didn't again on the way home.