Monstrous

By Shahrezad1

Summary: Roxanne thinks it's high time she visited her cousin, especially after missing the girl's ill-fated wedding. Meanwhile Megamind follows with…monstrous results.

Disclaimer: Roxanne wears red, Megamind is blue. This Disclaimer is somewhat pointless, but please don't sue…I'm poor enough already. ^^;

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Normal is a relative term.

It was a thought that came to Roxanne Ritchie often enough, starting almost ten years ago. But if normal was an average of experiences, added together and leveled out to number the similarities, then an 'out of the ordinary' experience took quite a deal of effort.

Unknown to her, this would be one of those days. Weeks.

It started off 'average' enough. Megamind, Metro City's newly reformed hero, was busy at work coming up with ideas. And it was amazing to see what he could come up with, given the right incentive.

Schematics for a clean-energy water-processing plant ("purifying the city's lee-quids while creating simultaneous friction-based ee-nergy!") mingled with sketches for a new dehydration gun ("It has a new setting! Slow-mo freeze!"), while sketches for a new costume hovered overhead via clips, courtesy of Minion and the brainbots. Blueprints mixed with rough sketches which were smattered with megamind-blue sticky notes. And buried beneath it all was a thirties-ish, cerulean-skinned alien wearing toxic-symbol pajama pants and un unclosed white button-up, plain t-shirt showing through from beneath. Devilishly cute black slippers hugged his feet malevolently, button-y red eyes glittering pseudo-balefully.

He didn't notice the bemused reporter's scrutiny, a combination of inherent snoopiness and his own loud "mood" music working in her favor. But she didn't mind the lack of attention-it meant that she got the chance to watch him, in all his energetic glory.

Roxanne just silently watched, appreciation running her eyes along the line of wiry muscle in his back, while curiosity made her wonder if the skin at the base of his skull was as soft as it looked. And if it was, just how smooth and warm would it be? He was always covered by those high-necked cowls of his, so much that sometimes she wondered what it would be like to just graze her fingers along the back…

Blinking at the almost voyeuristic thought (could it be considered voyeuristic? She wasn't quite sure), Miss Ritchie blushed a slight, embarrassed pink. Things were getting to a point where it was almost difficult not to notice the similarities between him and his normal human male counterparts, large head and skin color aside. And even more so with their previous relationship between them.

Honestly, she'd never even been attracted to the real Bernard, from having vaguely known him before during the construction of the Metroman museum. It hadn't been until Megamind commandeered the identity that she even took notice of his existence, to be honest, and it had really been the villain's personality which had brought him alive. So applying that character to a different body type wasn't difficult. Jarring, yes. Difficult, no. And when she thought about all those times he'd held her hostage or carried her as she tumbled off into unconsciousness, arms steady around her…

Suffice to say she'd started thinking about runners. And scarecrows. Gymnasts too.

Which made their relationship difficult.

Namely, they didn't have one. Whatever had previously existed between the two of them was left behind in the tide of current events, memories playing out behind closed lids and in awkward conversation. And with no time to discuss apologies or faults before they were shoved back into the limelight, and specifically back into roles like 'Hero' and 'Devoted Reporter,' they had nowhere to go. The public had been quick enough to throw them together (this time as a couple, rather than Villain and victim), his hands wrapped around her waist a rather telling image. But the truth was that nothing had progressed.

Roxanne didn't dare say it aloud, especially having 'known' him for literally years, but it seemed almost as though Megamind had become shy around the news anchor. And as for herself humble pie was a bitter meal, but she knew it was more than an issue of breaking down her pride and asking forgiveness; she had to find out where she stood. Did she still care about him? Was he still the same person, façade aside?

And more importantly, did she really want to be tied to the city's new resident hero? It was the same dilemma which had deterred her from a relationship with his predecessor (and apparently life-long rival), rebuffing Metroman's hints and forays without a single thought. All she had ever really wanted was a normal life-well, reporting aside. A husband, a family, and maybe even a white picket fence…or at least a decent apartment.

Of course, she'd never asked for her romantic life to be constantly under the public eye. But in determinedly not dating Metroman while still being connected to him in publication she had been left with her Friday and Saturday nights free, kidnappings aside.

Not that the situation would change, should she accept a superhero for a 'boyfriend' (curse the term and it's tacky public connotations). Instead of being dateless over the weekend, she'd more likely get deserted for gang wars, drug busts, and the endlessly plaguing struggle for villain territory. So was she really ready to risk it with a man who had also played a large part in her 'single' status, the mustache-twirling villain to Metroman's white knight?

And then there was her heart leaping at the idea, like it had some part in the situation as it stated that it didn't give a fig for the ramifications. What then, if she followed the blasted thing? It threw the whole situation, and especially her logical mode of thinking, for a loop.

Either way the situation was out of her hands-interest or no interest, it was hard to instigate much of anything romantic when your other half was jumping at shadows and shouting about leaving their nuclear reactor switched on any time they bumped into one another.

Roxanne sighed almost inaudibly and smoothed down her pencil skirt, the ruffle at the back her one acquiescence to femininity. The rest was all business, black suit coat matching her monochromatic color scheme of white blouse and plain pumps. It was a standard outfit for the reporter when laundry needed to be done or someone political was to be interviewed. She didn't really mind the blandness in those occasions because, well, usually in those situations she was as interested in seeing them as they were in seeing her.

Still, it made for a pretty plain-looking 'goodbye' outfit.

The sigh she'd expulsed made Megamind's head turn slightly, ear cocked. But with no follow-up commentary he probably assumed that it was just Minion doing his rounds, who knew better than to interrupt him when he was in a full-out brainstorm, pun intended.

Unknown to him, she definitely wasn't Minion.

Closing in the few short steps that separated them, Roxanne allowed her hand to grasp his thin shoulder. It was more physical contact than they had had in almost two weeks, and she took the opportunity provided by his distraction to her advantage, making it not just a touch but a caress as she cupped the round of the bone.

The alien froze for less than a millisecond, just enough for her to notice, then flung himself away against one of the surrounding walls, chest heaving with either anxiety or something else. She felt guilty for a few moments as they just stared at one another, open-mouthed.

"Miss Ri-Roxanne! I-."

"I'm going out of town, Megs. I thought you should be the first to know."

Surprise turned to dismay and on to horror in short succession, his ribs no longer huffing and puffing but frozen as though he could somehow hold the air permanently in, "w-what? You're kidding, right?"

"Afraid not, Green Eyes," a purple blush ambushed his angular features, said green eyes widening. She smiled softly, unease dimmed as they came to somewhat familiar territory. Namely him trying to put up a front of bravado and skepticism while she teased him, "my cousin called in a favor, saying that there was some emergency that direly needed my help, so I'm going to be flying out today. And since I missed her wedding day I thought I should probably give in or pay the consequences."

"Con-SEA-quenches?"

"Yeah, she knows just a little bit too much about me," irony and humor made the words slip past her censor, and as soon as she saw the deliberately un-curious stillness of his face Roxanne knew she shouldn't have said anything. Oh, well. Too late for that, "also, things are pretty settled right now so I thought the timing would allow for it."

"Settled? Um, but…uh. What if something happens while you're gone?" arms that had been spread-eagled came forward to grasp her by the shoulders and this time it was her turn to blush. The Ex-Villain didn't notice, "Who will cover the stories?"

"Oh, Iris McIntire, I imagine. She's been eyeing my job for ages, so I wouldn't be surprised if she jumped at the chance."

Her calm matter-of-factness didn't put even a dent in the blue-man's worries, and it was with anxiety that he actually shook her, slim fingers wrapped in a very permanent way upon her arms. His fingers were long enough that they just brushed her collar bone, thin and spindly. Roxanne blushed again, rosily.

"But what if I…what if I'm not…"

Ah.

Roxanne raised one hand in order to gently place it along his cheekbone, enjoying the faint warmth that softly radiated from his skin. And that seemed to help somewhat when it came to his fluttering nerves. As for the reporter, she was just reveling in their current closeness. To think she'd rejected this with her callous words before…

"You'll be fine, with no backsliding. Minion will be here to help you…keep on track," playfully, she tapped his chest with a lightly balled fist, the same way she had so many weeks ago with his Bernard disguise. And by that point his own grip had dropped to the one side, while the other hand remained as though holding on to a lifeline.

"Besides, it's only a week."

"Yes. A wee-ick."

"A week, Megamind, just a week."

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AN: Um, not much to say. Just that this idea hit me with a sledgehammer, and will probably exist as about a three-shot-er, but no more than that. The beginning is a little slow, but it won't remain that way for long, I assure you. –practices her evil laugh- And on a side note, yay, I'm writing again!