Failure to live.

Since everyone loves to see our heroic Chocobo suffering, let's place Cloud into some situations and see how he'll react.

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As I was riding back to the bar after a long day delivering to Kalm and Junon. I saw someone had hung a poster announcing I was to be married to Yuffie on the side door through which I push Fenrir into the storeroom of the bar. I take a closer look at the poster thinking, 'Yuffie, I'm going to kill you for this.' I just hope Tifa hasn't seen this. I can't imagine how she must be feeling if she has.

Upon taking the poster down I saw another smaller poster hidden underneath stating, 'Zack was here'. I just shake my head forgiving Yuffie immediately and uttering, "I should've known." I then open the double doors and push Fenrir inside.

"Cloud, is it true?" Tifa asked as I walk into the bar area to find that she had just finished cleaning up. She puts the broom away and we head upstairs to the living area.

"Cloud, is it true about you and Yuffie? Is that why you are away so often? Do you think so little of me that you don't even tell me?" She asks not letting me speak and then she slaps me harshly in the face. "I don't know what to make of this Cloud, I'm conflicted here." She sits on the sofa and tears start streaming down her cheeks.

I stare at her. "Tifa, I am not marrying Yuffie. It's a practical joke."

She looks up at me wiping the tears from her eyes. "Really Cloud?"

"Yes. I think she's a beautiful girl, but she's too flaky. My friend Zack put up the poster. Back in ShinRa he was always pulling pranks on people. Here he left his calling card. See?" I hand her the 'Zack was here' poster.

She takes the poster, her anger starting to well. "Cloud, do you expect me to believe some dead guy put up that poster? I am really getting fed up of telling you this, Zack... is... dead... He died years ago. You need to move on with your life. You are doing a better job at it now I admit that, but it seems you still have not let go." Her anger starts subsiding with that rant.

"I know Tifa but that doesn't stop him coming back from the lifestream to pull pranks on me."

"Cloud, people don't come back from the dead just to pull pranks on other people." She gets up yawning. "Get to bed. I don't want to talk about it anymore."

"Zack would," I whisper in exasperation once out of her earshot while heading to my room.

I walk into my room and close the door behind me. "Hi Cloud." I hear a familiar voice from by the window. I sigh ignoring the voice and walk over to my desk to check the phone for messages. "Cloud? Talk to me buddy." Sighing again, I bring my hands up to my head massaging my temples and count to three before turning to face Zack. He's standing there in nothing but his underwear. "So, how're you doing buddy?" I just glare at him angrily. I'm in no mood to speak to him right now especially after the poster and that conversation with Tifa about it; all I wanted was to get some sleep.

"Can't you just stay in the lifestream?" I shout at him.

"But... being dead is boring..." I walk toward him. He smiles fading away as I try to grab him.

I was now wide awake so decide to go downstairs to have a quick drink in the bar. I mean Tifa won't mind if I take just 1 or 2 beers...? I find it helps me calm down.

I had only intended to have just the two beers, but that turned into three, then into four. Then eventually after the tenth and an entire bottle of Vodka, I was stumbling out of the toilet feeling better after being sick. "Cloud Strife!" I look up seeing Tifa standing there. I wonder what she is doing down here, I thought by now she would be asleep. "What are you doing down here?" her tone radiating anger and I now realise she is upset with me again.

"Hi Teef, couldn't sleep so I'm just having a beer to help me unwind," I slur staggering towards her. Stopping to lean against a table casually, I notice as well as her dressing gown she was wearing her fighting gloves too. I must have woken her up I realise. I put on my hurt puppy eyes and raise my face slowly to make eye contact with her. It didn't work; she is fuming at me... so I attempt to resume my walk towards the stairs to get to bed. However, at that moment my legs decide to become uncooperative causing me to fall over straight into the table.

She rushes over to help me up from the wreckage of the table then shoves me in the direction of the stairs. "Get upstairs NOW! I cleaned up this bar already so I could lay-in tomorrow, just look at this mess..." Somehow I manage to make it upstairs and into my room without falling over again. I attempt to get undressed for bed but am unable to get my boots off. I swear in drunken frustration as I fall over missing the bed. The door opens and Tifa storms in. "Will you be quiet in here Cloud. I am trying to sleep." Seeing I was struggling to get undressed, she reluctantly helps me by sitting me on my bed and removing my boots. After tucking me into bed, she leaves my room. I lay there and close my eyes, as I do the room starts spinning so I open them again and turn to my side. Eventually sleep came.

I abruptly wake up in shock I was soaked. I glance up to find Tifa standing over me holding an empty jug in her hands, eyes staring right at me. I look at my clock. "Tifa, its only 8am and I have no deliveries today; let me sleep," I grumble realising I was wet because she had just thrown water over my head to wake me.

"Cloud Strife, I want you to march down those stairs and clean up that mess you left in the bar last night." I groggily get up realisation dawning on me as to why my entire head was pounding. She leaves my room, shortly after I hear her bedroom door slamming shut. I quickly dress and head down to clean up the bar.

As I walk into the bar my eyes widen, it looked like there had been a brawl in here with a couple of smashed tables and broken glass all over the floor. 'Damn, did I cause all this mess?' I think to myself then head for the cleaning cupboard grabbing a dustpan and broom, then start clearing up the broken glass.

After spending just over an hour sweeping, I go to the stairs and call up to ask Tifa what she wanted me to do with the damaged tables. "If they can't be repaired then break them up for the wood burner," she calls in response, obviously still angry with me. I return to the bar area and begin inspecting the tables I had shamefully destroyed in my drunken stupor. I drag them into the storeroom where I start breaking them down placing the salvageable wood to one side and the unsalvageable wood onto the firewood pile. I look at the pile of salvageable and note that there is enough to make a new table.

I return to my room and check my PHS finding several missed calls from Yuffie and an accompanying voice message. I play back the message. "Cloud, when were you in Wutai and why did you put a poster in Turtles Paradise advertising our engagement? If you want to marry me then at least ask me out on a date first; I'm just by Kalm, I'll be in Edge by noon."

I sit on my bed holding my head, the headache finally starting to subside. I think to myself, 'Zack, I hope this is making it enjoyable in the lifestream for you.'

"Cloud. Breakfast's ready," I hear Tifa calling from the living room. I grab my PHS, place it in my pocket, and go to eat breakfast with her. I am not looking forward to today. I wish I had some deliveries to do so I could get away for the rest of the day, maybe stay overnight in Costa at the Avalanche Villa.

I sat in silence at the dining table with Tifa while she stared at me, 'is she still angry with me? How do I make up for this?' I wonder to myself. After we finish eating, she glances at the clock. "10:45 already? I better go make sure the bar is clean and ready for me to open at 11." I decide to follow her just in case I had missed anything.

After a quick inspection, she turned to me smiling. "I'm impressed, the bar looks spotless. Shame we're a couple tables down. I will contact Reeve later to see if the WRO have any spare we can have."

"Actually we only need the one. I managed to salvage enough good wood from them to make a new one. I'll just go start on it now..." I inform her. I turn to head for the storeroom but stop when I feel her hand on my arm.

"Good idea Cloud, no need to waste resources." She slides her hand down my arm and into my hand. "Tell me how come you got so drunk last night."

I sigh shaking my head. "I really don't know, Tifa. Between the really long day, that poster, and our discussion, I guess it pushed me over the edge." I didn't mention about Zack in his underwear as it would only make her rant at me again about his being dead and how I need to move on.

"Cloud, I'm sorry for snapping at you. It's just that you can be a frustrating person to live with sometimes."

"I am sorry Tifa." Just then, a knock was heard from the main bar door.

She looked at the clock behind the bar and then turned back to me. "Cloud we shall talk about this later. Right now I have to go open up." She went to the main door to allow the customers entry so I head to the storeroom to start building the table.

I finish sorting the wood and was about to start nailing it together when the door to the storeroom opens and I hear, "Cloud you got a visitor. Your 'fiancée' is here." I recognize the sarcasm in Tifas voice, but I just nod at her and get up feeling confused. 'My fiancée?' I wipe my hands on a cloth and walk into the bar. Sitting at the bar was Yuffie. I stand there looking at her; I had forgotten she was coming.

"Hey Yuffie," I call over to her.

She turns around to face me. "Cloud, can we chat?" Tifa dismisses the last of the morning customers and closes the bar. Yuffie takes a poster out of her backpack and places it down on a nearby table. Tifa looks at it, I don't need to; I already knew it was one of the ones Zack had put up announcing 'our engagement'. "So Cloud, want to explain the poster?" The girls both stare at me waiting for an answer.

"Yuffie, as I tried to explain to Tifa last night, it's a prank pulled by Zack." I start explaining but get interupted.

"Cloud, for the final time... Zack is dead. Why can't you move on with your life and forgive yourself?" I am fed up with Tifa telling me that. Does she not understand I am trying to? At that, there was a knock on the door. Tifa looks over towards the door stating, "We're closed."

"What do you mean your f***ing closed? That closed just to the general public or does that include your friends too," Cid yells in response. Tifa gets up to let him in. Vincent follows behind him. They both look at the poster on the table; Yuffie smiles at me mischievously and stands next to me slipping her hand into mine. Vincent looks at us then places another poster on the table.

As he does Yuffie grabs me and plants a kiss on my lips. After my initial shock I return the kiss, sliding my arms around her. During the kiss, I feel her hands squeeze my ass, so I return the favour finding hers to be firm. "It's true then," Vincent said watching us making out.

After the kiss, Yuffie smiles at me, then turns to them and giggles sticking her tongue out. "What do you think..?" she tells them. I just stand there dumbfounded thinking to myself, 'Oh man, what have you started here Zack?' So I walk away heading to the storeroom. I look at Fenrir and decide to go for a ride to get away from everyone for a while.

I was angry. All my friends believed I was getting married to Yuffie. My mind started wandering through my actions of the day, initially of Yuffie, specifically if I should have played along the way I had. It was a natural reaction; I had not thought, I just reacted on impulse to her prompt. I was thinking about how she had grown into an attractive young lady but I hadn't meant to lead her on, she was still a little too immature most of the time. My making out with her had only made the fallout over Zack's prank worse.

I then thought about Tifa, how would she react? I sigh thinking about my feelings for her which recently I had started to realise were more than just of friendship. Should I tell her how I felt, was I ready for a relationship with her? Would it be fair on her? Had my leaving to search for a cure for Geostigma, and shutting myself off from the world hurt her too much? I realise now that was a mistake. Would she still be willing to take a chance on me?

I then thought of Aerith, of the guilt I had over her death. I had cared deeply for her, I had loved her even, but I was starting to realise the love I had for her was not as strong as the love I held for Tifa now. Was it Zack's love for her I was feeling? I knew my guilt over being too weak to fight Sephiroth's control as he killed her had made me wary of pursuing anything more than a friendship with Tifa. What if Sephiroth returned again and took her away?

I returned to reality when my stomach rumbled so I glanced at my Nav-Sav finding I was near the Chocobo ranch. I decided to grab a bite to eat there before heading back to Edge. I looked up from the screen and saw a flash of red in front of me. I swerved, narrowly avoiding it but in the process lost control of the bike. The front wheel collided with a rock causing the bike to come to an abrupt halt. My head slammed into the ground with a sickening thud as I was thrown off. I lay there dazed, wondering what the red thing was. I struggled to stay awake as my eyes stubbornly closed against my will.

Next thing I knew there was a wet thing nudging my side. "Cloud, wake up." I woke up realising I had passed out. "Are you alright, Cloud?"

"Yeah," I replied realising it was Nanaki I nearly hit. "Sorry, I was not watching where I was heading. I swerved to avoid you, lost control, and hit a rock." My head was throbbing so I started rubbing it where the pain was the worst in an attempt to relieve it. I saw a glow from the collar around Nanaki's neck then felt the familiar sensation of a low-level cure as it did its work repairing the injuries to my body. After the feeling passed, I got up and all the pain in my head was gone. "You still carry materia?"

"Only a low level restore in case I or anyone I encounter require healing. What are you doing out here? I thought you'd be with Yuffie, in Edge or Wutai." I realised Zack must have left posters in Cosmo too so I explained how the whole thing was a prank.

A couple days later.

I was riding into the Wutai capital. "Ok last stop, Wutai pagoda," I spoke to myself passing the guard at the town gate. This was a long delivery being that it was on another continent; Wutai took two days to reach. However, the guy who ordered the package paid double the going rate so Tifa insisted I go since we needed the cash.

Sighing, I knock on the pagoda door. It opens up slowly and Yuffie's father, Lord Godo, was standing there. "Ah. Cloud Strife, please, come in. I wish to speak with you." Nervously, I follow him into the pagoda. He leads me into a side room where a desk is located, takes a seat behind it, and gestures to a chair opposite, "Please take a seat Cloud." I do so. "I understand you and my daughter are engaged to be married?"

I take a deep breath. "Lord Godo, this whole thing of my marrying Yuffie is one giant prank. One arranged by my former best friend Zack." I inwardly cursed Zack once again for doing this.

"Cloud, from what I understand, Zack is dead?"

"He is yes but that doesn't stop him from coming to play pranks on me."

"Cloud, I am sorry to hear that it is a prank. It is a shame actually, as I can think of no one better suited to lead this nation and I know Yuffie thinks highly of you. She said without your leadership you guys would have never saved this planet."

"Thank you but our success was not purely because of me. I think your daughter will make a great leader without my or anyone else's help."

After our chat, we shake hands. "I understand Cloud. Thank you for the chat." I get up holding the parcel up for him to take which he does handing me the payment in return. I leave the Pagoda and then walk back into the main town to start looking for an inn since I missed the last boat. I pull out my PHS to phone Tifa and inform her there had been a delay and that I would be staying overnight here.

The next day while on my way back to Edge I decide to go to the cliff edge where Zack's Buster sword was located, to demand answers about why he put up so many posters. After an hour of demanding he show himself. I give up and get on Fenrir. I put the key in the ignition just as he appears and stares at the Buster Sword. I walk over to him as he speaks to me, "This is where you are keeping my mentor's sword? I wanted you to take care of it. Not leave it exposed like this, allowing it to rust. If Angeal knew, it was left out in the open like this, he would be angry. You think Sephiroth is scary when angry; Angeal is worse, trust me. He told me that this sword represents his SOLDIER honour. When I was forced to kill the monster he had become his sanity returned. As he lay there dying he gave it me, entrusted me with it."

"But... this is where you died Zack, it's a grave marker," I reply looking at the sword.

"This may be where my body died but my heart lived on, at least for a while. It finally died in Aerith's church just after Sephiroth killed her." Zack looked down at the ground tears forming in his eyes. "I loved her, still do." He picked up the sword resting it against his forehead and started to weep.

After he placed the sword back in the ground, he turned to leave. I stop him. "Wait, before you leave, tell me why did you put up those posters all around the world?"

He looks at me, smiles mischievously and says, "I told you the other day Cloud, being dead is boring." At that he disappears again.

I pick up the Buster sword from the cliff edge having decided Zack was right; leaving it exposed like that is causing it to rust. So I place it on my back over the harness I use for First Tsurugi and ride in the direction of Midgar.

I open the door to the church and smile at the newly formed pool where I and many of the infected children were cured of Geostigma. I then walk towards the flowerbed looking for a suitable place for the sword. I look towards the altar deciding it would be a good central position for it. I walk around the flowerbed up to the altar to find the ground has become slightly raised here. I stare at the mound in the floor. 'Can't remember seeing that before,' I think to myself. I remove the sword from my back, rest it against my forehead and say a little prayer for Zack... and Angeal. I then thrust it downwards penetrating the raised ground. I take a step back looking at the sword thinking, 'It's as if it belongs there' and then turn to leave.

As I walk around the flowerbed, I see multiple rolls of paper on one of the pews. I unroll one and find it's one of the marriage posters. "I told him not to do it. He just said it'll be funny."

I turn around and find Aerith standing there next to the sword, her hand on the hilt smiling. "Aerith, why did he do it? Everyone believed it, thought I was marrying Yuffie."

Aerith looks at me, releases the sword, and then starts to giggle. "He was right, this is funny. Cloud you take things too seriously." She then disappears.

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Hi. I have decided to edit each chapter in this story with my amazing beta reader, since it was determined to become a more serious story.

I apologise for removing the "list style", I decided to drop them, as I was struggling to think of new list titles.