Props to Forester et al. It all belongs to you. Please don't kill me like
you did my poor Archie. And Wellard. And Clayton. And Chadd. And all
those people. So there.
And additional credit to the inspiration of Shel Silverstein, for writing the original "Sick". Thanks.
"I cannot go and sail at sea"
Said little Archie Kennedy
"I'm having fits and aching guts
Assaults and burns and lots of cuts
I'm going deaf, my eyes are blind
Now something's poked me in the eye
My bruises are as big as rocks
I'm surprised I've no smallpox
I remember of my tortures past
I've fallen from up on the mast
My legs all break, I have heat stroke
This really isn't a big old joke
I cough, hiccup, and cry in the dark
My leg is bit off by a shark
I have bad migraines in my head
I might be better suited dead
I'm always doused, my body's sprained
And now my blood is being drained
My chest is shot, my toes are smushed
I panic when I'm being rushed
My head is hurt, concussed again
I've never felt such awful pain
I'm dehydrated near to death
Those authors never let me rest
Possessed by demons, a vampire too
Now I'm stung by jellyfish, ew!
Struck by lightning, personality split
And am I getting a big zit?
I have a fever, and my brain is—what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say that I'm not dead today?
Hey hey, let's all go celebrate!
And additional credit to the inspiration of Shel Silverstein, for writing the original "Sick". Thanks.
"I cannot go and sail at sea"
Said little Archie Kennedy
"I'm having fits and aching guts
Assaults and burns and lots of cuts
I'm going deaf, my eyes are blind
Now something's poked me in the eye
My bruises are as big as rocks
I'm surprised I've no smallpox
I remember of my tortures past
I've fallen from up on the mast
My legs all break, I have heat stroke
This really isn't a big old joke
I cough, hiccup, and cry in the dark
My leg is bit off by a shark
I have bad migraines in my head
I might be better suited dead
I'm always doused, my body's sprained
And now my blood is being drained
My chest is shot, my toes are smushed
I panic when I'm being rushed
My head is hurt, concussed again
I've never felt such awful pain
I'm dehydrated near to death
Those authors never let me rest
Possessed by demons, a vampire too
Now I'm stung by jellyfish, ew!
Struck by lightning, personality split
And am I getting a big zit?
I have a fever, and my brain is—what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say that I'm not dead today?
Hey hey, let's all go celebrate!