A/N: My roommate prompted me to write this after we watched Blame It On The Alcohol. She thought it would be interesting to see what happened when Kurt did talk to his dad about a boy staying over. This is what happened.

Disclaimer: Glee isn't mine, too bad. Bad Romance belongs to Lady Gaga, and the fictional character Burt adores the non-fictional John Mellancamp.

Just a Question

"Hummel residence, this is Burt speaking."

Kurt cleared his throat, looking to his boyfriend sitting beside him for confirmation that this was absolutely necessary. He spoke into the mouthpiece on his cell, "Hey Dad, it's me. I just had a question before Dave and I come home next week."

Kurt was looking forward to going home for Thanksgiving break. It'd been two months since he'd started his first year of studying music at Oberlin Music Conservatory and going to Lima, only two and a half hours away, on the weekends just wasn't an option for him after tuition. It was even more exciting that it would be a holiday with both his family and his boyfriend, who was attending the College of Arts and Sciences at Oberlin.

"Yeah, Kurt? What's up?" Burt responded, unconcerned after hearing the tone of Kurt's voice.

"Well, you remember a few years ago when Blaine crashed at our house after 'the Rachel Berry house party train-wreck extravaganza'?" Kurt wanted to torture his father for as long as he could. He grinned as he thought about that night, still trying to impress Blaine by taking him to what was possibly the lamest party ever.

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Son. Just ask your question." Burt was starting to sound impatient. Kurt soldiered on; he intended to torture his dad a bit before he actually asked the question.

"You know… the incident that prompted us to have… 'the talk'?" He knew his father would remember that. Burt had tried so hard to understand Kurt and his sexuality. Unfortunately, the talk occurred two weeks after the incident, with Burt awkwardly reading from a Mrs. Pillsbury-Howell style pamphlet titled 'Boys and Boys – So you're gay and want to have intercourse,' and Kurt covering his ears and singing 'Bad Romance' as loud as he could to tune out the words being read.

"Shit, Kurt. Yes. I know -that- talk. Please don't tell me that your question involves more tips for gay sex, because we both decided it was better you found that information online or something."

"What? You mean you don't have any more gems like 'Be sure the penis and entrance are sufficiently prepared with a water-based lubricant.' to throw in my direction. Pity, really. I could use your sage advice right about now." Another point for Kurt.

"Fuck. I have tried to erase that image from my mind. Don't tell me you are having sex with Dave. I don't want to hear about it. It's taken me this long to get used to the fact that he is gay and that's what stick was up his ass when he threatened to -kill- you. Don't push it with me, Kurt." Burt sighed, and Kurt knew that he wasn't truly upset. They'd had this talk before. Many times.

Kurt thought he'd try for another jab at his father, postponing the true purpose of this phone call a little bit longer. "Don't worry Dad, I won't tell you about how he bent me over my desk last night, or how he is on his knees in front of me right now." His father started singing some John Mellancamp song in response, growing louder when Dave chuckled in the background. There was a good chance that Burt didn't know Kurt was kidding, and hearing his reaction to Dave's laugh had only cemented that theory.

While his dad had accepted his homosexuality from the beginning, the 'sexual' part of the word had always been a struggle. This had led them to many conversations, though most of them were in the form of arguments or awkward silences while sitting in the living room. Burt had told Kurt what he needed to know, or he had referred him to the internet when the conversations turned too uncomfortable. The latter had happened more often than not.

These conversations had come to a complete halt when he started dating Dave Karofsky a year ago. Something about there being an actual opportunity for sex to occur made it a taboo topic. Kurt didn't want his dad to know when they chose to start rounding the bases, and Burt honestly didn't want to know if Kurt had even put on a uniform.

Burt interrupted Kurt's thoughts, "Seriously, Kurt. Was there a reason for this phone call besides torturing me with details of your sex life?"

"Can't a son just call his dad to talk? With no ulterior motives?" Kurt called his dad at least three times a week, to make up for his lack of visits home, so calling with no reason was nothing new to either of them. "No, I promise there is a point to this call. You never did answer my question."

"You haven't asked me one." Burt seemed to be edging closer to irritation. His good humor had lasted longer than usual, so Kurt wasn't complaining.

"Dad. Focus. I asked you a question at the beginning of the conversation. Do you remember that time that I let Blaine crash in my room?"

"Yes. Now that you've talked about it." Burt still had a confused tone to his voice.

"Do you remember our conversation about it the next day?" Kurt was working on getting to the point. Slowly but surely.

"When I told you boys couldn't sleep over in my house, because you weren't going to do anything inappropriate under my roof?" Yeah, he remembered it. Damn, Kurt had been looking forward to teasing him a few more minutes before broaching the subject.

Kurt swallowed and tried to put on his best poker face, knowing if he could stay straight-faced, it would make his voice seem more serious. "You know that Dave and I have been together a year now, and cohabitating for two months." He knew this would strike a nerve with his father. Burt had been slow to accept his relationship with the football player, citing that while he had forgiven Karofsky, he would not forget how he had bullied his son for years. When Kurt had approached him that summer about his plans to share an apartment with the boy, Burt had been less than enthused. However, Burt understood that Kurt wasn't a little boy anymore, and he trusted Kurt to do what was right.

Burt cleared his throat before responding, "Yes, Kurt. I'm aware of your relationship. What is this getting at?"

"You are also aware that his family kicked him out when they found out that David is gay and had been dating me for six months without their knowledge." Kurt cringed when he thought back to the night Mr. and Mrs. Karofsky had walked in on them in a less than platonic situation one afternoon at the beginning of the summer. It was fortuitous that David had already planned to attend Oberlin during the summer session to get a head start on his biochemistry studies, so Dave had just laid low for the following days until the lease on their apartment began.

"Yes," Burt had been sympathetic to the boy, seeing how much it hurt Kurt that the Karofskys were not as open-minded as he had been.

It was now or never. If Kurt was going to earn one last point in the conversation with his dad, he had to get his hit in now.

"You told me to ask…" Kurt scoffed as he let the sarcasm rise in his voice, "Is it okay if I have a boy who might be gay sleep in my bed? Who knows… We might even have sex. A lot. Loudly." Kurt let out a full laugh as he heard his father groan in response. It was Burt's fault. He wanted Kurt to ask, he'd said so himself.

"Might be gay? I'd hope you'd know for sure by now." Burt was obviously ignoring any information about his son's sex life.

Kurt ignored this, "Is that a yes?"

"I don't want to know anything about it." Burt sighed, and Kurt knew he was giving him the okay.

"Thanks, Dad! I'll see you Friday!" Kurt said as he hit the end button on his phone. Looking at Dave, he mumbled, "Happy? That's the last time I make a bet with you. I hate being on the losing end."

Dave grinned widely, "Giving up red meat for the week was totally worth it to watch you and your dad squirm through that conversation."

When Kurt and Dave arrived in Lima that Friday, they found a small present on the bed. Kurt set down his duffel bag and grabbed the box, unwrapping it quickly. Inside he found a note, "I have earplugs. Have fun. – Dad." Under the note was a box of condoms.

"Glad to see he takes his fatherly duties seriously," Dave mused, tossing the box of condoms between his hands.

Kurt grinned, "Or not…" He could hear his dad singing Mellancamp from the living room downstairs.