Puckzilla's Prey

NC-17

Illiandyandra

Pairings: Puck/Mercedes/Kurt

Disclaimer: GLEE, and all the characters associated there with belong to Ryan Murphy and his clique, Fox, and a bunch of people who are not me. I make no profit from this story and suing me would only yield a whole bunch of well-loved books.

Content Disclaimer: This story contains sex, smut, Lemons, Limes; however you want to say it. If you do not like that then keep on looking.

Distribution: Anyone who wants it. Just let me know and give credit where it is due.

Feedback: I, like most authors, enjoy positive reviews. Constructive Criticism is also appreciated.

Spoilers: Primarily the Second Season 2:14 Blame it on the Alcohol

Summary: The sex shark goes on a feeding frenzy. SPRITE =Lemony + Limony Goodness of the Smutty variety.

Author Note: I LOVE reviews…without them…I don't have the strength to beat back all the plot bunnies, and focus on my major stories.

BTW: I was Mercedes in high school…maybe that's why I like her so very much.

You know what…I don't blame it on Alcohol. I blame it on Rachel 'I need life experiences' Berry and her 'Separated at birth boy twin' Blaine. I mean it's all their fault. If they hadn't had that make out session during spin the bottle, I'd have never seen Hummel sitting there looking all pathetic and dumbstruck.

Then if the 'gender is the only difference' duo hadn't absolutely had to start singing, I wouldn't have noticed Mercedes…alone. Which made me think about how she is always alone now that Hummel is gone. Kind of pissed me off. I mean we're supposed to be all family like…but no one really hangs with Jones unless they want to blast a duet and blow away Berry and Mr. Schue.

So I say this to Lauren, and she in her drunken stupor says the most boss thing ever. She looks me dead in the eye and says, "You should give up on me and go get with them. I bet that would be smokin hot. Isn't it every dude's dream to have a threesome? You could do it before you even leave high school. That would be hard core."

"Uh, yeah that's the dream. Always figured it'd be two chicks and me though.
I retorted.

"Yeah but this way would be even hotter…cause I heard that gay men give the best head. And Mercedes is quiet and smart…those girls are always freaky." She smiled at me patted my cheek. "Besides I'm tired of trying to find ways to keep you as my friend—even though I don't wanna get with you."

I rolled my eyes; all I could have told me that rather than leading me on with all that 'wooing' bullshit.

"Plus Jones, she's a lot smaller than me…but still bodacious. You gotta work your way up to somebody like me. Besides she's cool and you're right…I'm tired of seeing her alone too." Lauren said rather gently.

"So—say I as gonna try to make this mack. How? Jones may be quiet…but she's mean as hell. And I've dumped Hummel into too many dumpsters. This isn't gonna be easy." I whined. I hate getting whiny-but was feeling nicely buzzed so I didn't sweat it too much.

"The best things in life rarely are, my friend, they rarely are." Said the drunken philosopher. "Start easy. Before we leave here go flirt with Mercedes, heck ask her to dance with you. See if you get a boner. If you do, tell her. She should be as drunk as we are, she'll think it's sweet."

So I stood up and headed over to where Jones was sitting on the floor. I pulled her up and started dancing with her. It was a slowish song so I was able to pull her close. I like girls and Jones is a good looking, good smelling, soft and curvy one. It didn't take any time at all before I was pressing my cock into her belly. She laughed at me. So I kissed her. What, she's hot when she laughs. Let me tell you one firm fact. Mercedes Jones can KISS. For a while we just stood there, swaying and kissing. I think I kind of forgot the plan…because we were making out for a while. It was so long Hummel, Kurt, decided to come over and check on us.

This gave me a BRILLIANT idea. I pulled Kurt into the dance too. Yeah, let them see how well we could move together. At first I kind of had them both in front of me…mooshed together. But that wasn't working. So I slid behind Jones, while keeping Hummel locked in front of her. Then once we were all dancing…ok so I was just grinding on Jones…her ass is soft—I pulled Hummel forward and laid one on him.

Maybe one day I'll be able to tell you which one of these two besties kiss better…but for now just let me say that they both have soft sweet lips and they both have soft skin. They each have these truly different, but completely droolworthy twisty things they do with their tongues. I think I could actually spend the next 30 -40 years kissing them, and maybe then I could tell you who's better. Eventually I had to break the kiss. Even a hard ass has to breathe. For a minute Hummel, Jones, and I just stood there all pressed together. Breathing hard. Then either by fate, or more than likely, Artie's sense of humor. The dulcet tones of Katy Perry started to flow through the room.

"I kissed a boy and I liked it. Hope my girlfriend don't mind it." I sang softly. "I kissed a girl and I liked it, hope my boyfriend don't mind it." I pressed little kisses to each of their lips as I sang. It struck me that if I did manage to get these two into my bed. It would be the first time I ever sexed any one I cared about, liked, and respected. I mean I care about Quinn and Santana. I even like Quinn. But I stopped respecting her when she agreed to cheat on Finn. And I don't think Santana even respects herself. As for the rest of the chicks I've banged…I've liked some ok. But mostly it was all about the booty.

I do feel all three for Lauren…but apparently I just don't do it for her. I kind of respect Berry. Kinda. But I can't stand her on a day to day talking to her level. I'm pretty sure the only thing she really likes about herself is her talent…that's all I usually like about her. "I like you Jones. You've been alone too much since Hummel here left." I say sincerely. She smiles at me. It makes me feel good-and horney. So I smile back. "You and Hummel should come with me."

Kurt leans into Mercedes. He's thrown his arm over her shoulder. "Come with you where?"

"Wherever you want to go. I want to take you two somewhere and make you feel so good." Then I think of something. "Leave boy-Berry here. Maybe he and girl-Berry can commit some incest. You, me and Ms. Ms JONES, can find somewhere to break some other laws." I couldn't help it…I always wanted to sing her name like that.

Jones just starts laughing her ass off. "Boy-Berry. Blaine is so Rachel's long lost brother. Ha, Ha, ha!"

Kurt however is giving me a look that makes me shiver a little. "Noah, I didn't think you identified as bi-sexual."

That makes me laugh. "I'm not. I'm greedy. I want to taste Jones while fucking you. Want to have you lick my balls while I'm fucking Jones. Wanna see the two of you sucking my cock together. I want to show you the beauty of a rack like Jones…See Greedy!"

My prey was standing there looking completely and 100 percent shocked. Hummel's slacks are working hard to keep his dick contained, and Jones high beams are fully on. Puckzilla is on the hunt and these two are looking like they might just come willingly. I saunter over and pull Hummel into another hot as hell kiss, then I turn to Jones and plant one on her too.

"You go Puck!"Zizes yells encouraging me. That or she wanted to let Jones know she was good with my change of quarry.

"I must tell you, Noah, Neither Mercedes nor I have ever engaged in social interactions of a sexual nature of the level you are addressing. Neither do we engage in casual sexual interactions." Kurt's sobriety was evident in his ability to say all of that.

Usually I would be cutting my losses now. Puckzilla is not a one woman kind of zilla; so you could have knocked me over with a gentle breeze at what slipped out of my mouth next. "I can be serious. But only if its both of you. I'd be too tempted to play while you were at Dalton with out Jones to play with during the week. Besides. I really like tits, man. But what about you. no feening for Boy-Berry just cause 'Cedes and me are at McKinley." WTF, am I saying. Am I seriously thinking of this for more than a sex thing? Maybe I was. But in my defense, it would take a while to work through all the nasty things I wanted to do to these tow. I could stick with them until they were completely corrupted.

Jones found her voice. "Are you two serious? I mean Kurt; you don't really think you could do anything with me and enjoy it? And Puck you like skinny chicks." She said. I will admit that I edited out her drunken slurring.

"Shit, Jones. If I wanted to hook up with Zizes, and jumped through ALL her hoops, don't you think I can be into you? Didn't you feel how hard you had my cock out there when we were dancing?" I groused.

"Yeah, but just getting wood dancing…that happens to all guys, right. But seeing a chick naked is a whole different kettle of fish." She pouted.

"Oh hush. You are the hotness. I've been telling you that for years." Kurt shushed her.

"Look Jones, have I been an asshole…yes. Am I being one now? I don't think so. I can truly say that right now you and Hummel have an opportunity to show me what I've been missing. And maybe learn how good we can be together." I held out my hands to them, and gave my best Puckzilla smile.

Kurt threw a look over his shoulder. "Finn, watch out for Blaine. He can sleep in my room. I'm gonna go grab a bite with 'Cedes and Noah." Hummel said to his stepbrother. He grabbed Mercedes' hand and mine and dragged us up the stairs and out of the house.