Me: Wow, more than a month without putting up a new chapter. To everyone reading this story, I'm sorry for not updating but the only excuses I have are: writers' block, too much work, got distracted by Harry Potter and Captain America, working on a new story, and getting ready for San-Japan this weekend!
I would like to thank Pop-goes-the-Prussia and Loveless Bunny for favoriting this story, Clozzie for reviewing and doin' the story alert thing, and Say It Say My Name and CherrySummer for reviewing! All of you got the new yaoi video from Hungary into your Christmas stockings!
Finland: How many times do I have to tell you! There couldn't have been a Christmas in July!
Me: Why not?
Finland: It's not right! Christmas is in December! That's how it is and that's how it will be!
Me: You're just mad because Sealand caught the three of us during.
Finland: THAT TOO! Now Su-san has to explain what happened, and I don't know if that's a good idea! He's so young… and not a country.
Me: Come on! Sealand's a growing boy, he should get to learn about the birds and the bees… the bees and the bees… birds and birds… THE BIRDS AND THE BEEGEE'S!
Finland: What? 0_0
Me: Nothing… I go crazy when I'm on a sugar low… lets get on with the story!
I own nothing… if I did, Hetalia would be taught in schools around the world!
April 1st – 3:00 PM
The world meeting was about to come to a conclusion with America finishing his proposal to make his land seem tougher to others…
"… and that's why I want to change my national anthem!"
"You really are nutburgers! You bloody idiot, what makes you think you'll be able to change your anthem, the one thing you have that makes you look somewhat respectable, into that monstrosity!"
"I'm afraid I must agree with L'Angleterre on this matter Alfred."
"Come on, Frenchie! It's an awesome song!"
"Hey! You have to pay me anytime you say 'Awesome!' I'm the only one in this meeting awesome enough to say 'Awesome' for free!
"Brudder! How many times must I tell you not to intrude on our meetings!"
"Totally unawesome, West."
"Ignoring Germany and Prussia, I don't think anyone would agree to an anthem that shouts out 'America! F#k Yeah!'"
"Come on, dude! That song's says what I'm all about!"
"Even the part at the end about slavery?"
"That part's a joke."
"Still not funny!"
"You're totally lame, Iggy!"
"Stop calling me that!"
"Whatever. If no one's gonna agree with any of my ideas, then meeting adjourned. Now that this lame meeting's over, who wants to get drunk?"
At this, more than half the room starts cheering before they burst through the doors, looking for a good bar. A certain unsuspecting Russian was about to go on his own until an annoying hero put an arm around his shoulders.
"Yo Ivan, lets go party with the rest of the guys!"
"Oh! Well thank you for inviting me, comrade."
Stop calling me comrade, you dirty commie bastard. "No problem dude! Let's get all drunk up in dis bitch!"
Russia sweatdrops as he's being taken into a limo with the rest of the guys. Italy was innocently sitting in Germany's lap, looking at all the sites to see, with Germany blushing the whole time. Prussia was gently nibbling on Canada's ear, and it took all of his will power not to moan in pleasure. France was flirting with England, with no success. America and Japan were talking about Anime conventions that were coming soon in both their countries. Russia was trying to convince China to become one with him, with no chance of it happening.
When they get back to their hotel, they all make a rush for the casino. After a few hours, some of the nations ended up several thousand dollars in debt to the casinos. America, who was playing Blackjack with Russia and France, made a few small bets with Russia. Winner of each bet gets a bottle of their favorite drink, paid by the loser. Easy to say, America lost every time. What Russia didn't know, was that Alfred was losing on purpose. Alfred wanted to get Ivan in just the right level of drunkenness so he could start on his plan.
*Flashback to the night before*
Alfred had it all planned. Shortly after texting his brother the night before, Al left immediately to a nearby pharmacy to stock up on Viagra. There was something weird about the guy who gave him his pills. He had a white streak in his hair and he seemed like he knew a bit too much about the hero and his plans, other than that, Al got what he wanted. Afterwards, Alfred went looking for someone to sell him some other drugs and he found just the person behind a nightclub. He went back to his hotel room and prepared the vodka.
There was something else he needed to call this a success, this something being a cute girl by the name of Natalya. Al went up to her room before the meeting started, a few hours early actually, the sun hadn't even gone up yet. After dodging the knives she threw at him for waking her up earlier than she's used to, Al explained that he had a plan that could help her.
"Help me how?"
"You want to marry Ivan, right?"
"YES! MORE THAN ANYTHING!"
"Keep quiet; the other nations might hear you!"
"Fine… what do I have to do?"
"It's easy. All you have to do is show up at the chapel tonight in a wedding dress, with a thick veil to cover your face, maybe your hair too. The less he sees, the easier this plan will be."
"Very well, where do I go?"
"You know the place where Britney Spears got married that one time?"
"If that's where I need to be, then fine, I will be there, anything to be with my dear brother."
"Sweet, be there tonight at 9:00!"
Alfred left Natalya's room to get ready for the meeting, as well as stocked up on whoopee cushions and a few shock buzzers. He went to the meeting room early to place the whoopee cushions on random seats and left to make himself look like he slept in. He met up with South Korea and Prussia and gave them a few buzzers to help him get everyone in the room. Many nations, especially Switzerland, England, and Cuba were pissed when they got a shock instead of a normal handshake.
When it was time to start the meeting, Liechtenstein was the first to sit down, and she regretted it immediately. As soon as she sat down, a fart noise was heard and the whole room was silent. Everyone was trying not to laugh; otherwise they'd have to deal with Vash. He gave everyone a look that said 'Laugh and die,' so everyone decided to sit down, start the meeting, and forget about this, and it would have been forgotten if not for the fact that as they all sat down, more then half the room farted
…
A quick moment of silence as everyone looked at the person closest to them, and the entire room burst into laughter! Even some of the grouchiest of nations started to laugh when they saw the person they hate the most be embarrassed in public. It was obvious who was the culprit who did this, so after the laughter died down, they all threatened Alfred to stop with the pranks during the meeting or else they will all join together to get rid of McDonald's around the world. That got Al to take the meeting seriously… until it was his turn to present his ideas for 'global peace.' His plan: Make the world terrified of America, and scare the world into peace, which is why he wanted to change his National Anthem to the theme from 'Team America: World Police.' Then we're back to where we started.
*Back to where we left off*
"Okay Ivan, last hand so we'll up the antae just a bit. Winner gets double, how's that sound?"
"Very well comrade!"
In a most dramatic round of Blackjack, both Alfred and Ivan went into super slow-motion!
…
…
Dramatic, isn't it?
…
…
And Russia wins this final round of Blackjack! Oh no! The world has gone into chaos! Llamas are headbutting children off boats! A talking elephant gets sexually molested by a flower! A unicorn losses it's horn looking for a magical snowman that could save the future!
Just kidding!
Russia wins, gets his vodka, and after he downs his first bottle… everything went black!
Que the dramatic music!
To be continued…
Me: Okay everyone! Almost time for this story to end! If things go well, the next chapter should be the last one.
If you haven't voted on my poll, there's still time to vote until the last chapter is up!
Until then, it's time for prize time! People who review and all that other stuff get a McDonald's card and a bottle of Maple Syrup!
America: Dude! What the hell, man! Why did you take my cards?
Me: Cuz' I needz somethin' ta go wit tha syrup I stole from yur bro, dude!
Canada: He's lying. He asked me for the syrup.
America: Whoa, Mattie! When did you get here?
Me: You didn't see him? He was here the whole time.
Canada: Thank you for noticing me.
Me: No problem, cutie! Now, let's go get some breakfast!
America: Dude, its lunch time.
Me: I know… We'll watch a movie, work up an appetite tonight, and then we'll get breakfast in the morning! XD
Canada: Review please!