A/N:Wow! I never thought I would see the day! Almost 4,000 words! o.o

Well, anyway, going to school soon. Just wanted to post this before I went. XD

As I said in the summary, this is for AssasinZAssasin who posted his first lemon pretty recently. I wrote this as a gift to him/her and to make him/her feel better. Added some humor to the oneshot... because I wanted to... And this fic has that AU assumption that Fang and Vanille survived. ;P

Damn... Grandma's yelling at me... x.x

So yeah. I tried keeping thr characters at least somewhat IC. And I am actually not far into the game at all (I only just got Odin xD)

Once more, this is for you, AssasinZAssasin! I'm proud of you for posting that lemon; it wasn't too bad for a first try! ^^

Lightning couldn't control the strong twitch in her eyebrow. "How any of you were able to convince me to join you all on this… this..."

"Wonderful and exciting deviation from humdrum and boring city life?"

"Field trip from the bowels of Hell itself is beyond me!" Lightning spat, glaring swords and daggers at Fang for her mediocre attempt at consoling the ex-soldier. Fang paid the nasty look no mind and slapped Lightning none too gently on the back, making Lightning stumble forward with the force of it.

"Oh, pull that muddy stick outta your tight ass, Light-bulb! We're camping in the great outdoors, with nothing but our weapons and our wits keeping some beastie from making us its next din-din. Survival's your thing, ya? So have fun!" Fang explained quite enthusiastically, slinging her arm lazily over Lightning's shoulder.

Lightning was not impressed.

"… You have three seconds to get off of me before I skewer you with your own spear, and feed the 'beasties' a roasted Fang-kabob…"

Fang sprang off of her, hands up in front of her in a defensive gesture. "Okay, okay! No need to be so touchy!"

Lightning stalked away, grumbling something unintelligible to herself as she stretched out the muscles and tendons of her arms and back. She may not see as much action as she used to, but that was certainly no reason to let herself get out of sha-

… Hello~

Lightning quickly stopped midstep (you could almost hear the cartoonish tire-screech) when her line of sight just so happened to fall on Hope bathing in a spring in the forest(Just how long have I been walking…?). As far as she knew—and for the moment, she was right—Hope knew absolutely nothing of her presence. Now, she could've walked away and act as if she had seen nothing. But then again, Hope had taken a liking to playing little games, little teasing games, with Lightning—torturously hot little games…

Lightning, not one to back away from a challenge, decided that she would play her now-eighteen-years-old companion's little game. Perhaps she would hug him just a bit longer than she should. Or maybe she would sneak an almost unsuspicious caress down his arm amongst otherwise ordinary, everyday touches. Maybe she would even sneak that same little caress onto his chest if she was feeling particularly bold.

In short, they had been getting to each other quite a bit; they were both getting hot under the collar, and Lightning really didn't know who was going to snap first. The sexual tension between them was so thick that you could practically cut it into bricks with a chainsaw and build a stronger-than-reinforced-concrete wall with the bricks of compressed horniness.

Now, that isn't to say that they just wanted a quick fuck to relieve some tension. Oh, no. Lightning knew Hope like-liked her and vice-versa. Neither had the guts to get it out straight (shocking, isn't it?), so they just silently longed for the other. At least until the day Hope came up with that devious little plot of his.

Apparently, he thought that he could poke and prod and push and jab at all of Lightning's little buttons. And apparently, he thought that he could goad Lightning into pushing all of his buttons like some deranged idiot who would just push some random button with an unknown purpose until it did something!

…

Apparently, he was right.

Lightning really had had enough of all of the teasing, of all of the heat that rushed between her legs whenever Hope hotly whispered something into her ear (Damn him and his… his sexy whisper!), and honestly, she really had enough of having to touch herself at night and feel ten times hotter and more flustered than before she even did anything!

Well, that day would be the end of it. She used to be a soldier, dammit! She might as well put some of what she's been taught into practice. Hope was currently her target, and "target" was just another word for "enemy". So what's the first thing you should do when you have an enemy?

That's right: you get to know your enemy.

… Ok. Lightning already knew Hope (are you surprised?), yes, but she needed more; something, anything that would give her the edge in their little battle of hormones and wits.

To review. Lightning saw Hope in the spring, Lightning had a choice, and Lightning made her choice.

To hell with this! Hope Estheim, prepare to admit defeat!

With that decision finally made, Lightning quietly situated herself behind a tree and began collecting data. And by "collecting data", I mean "she was checking him out from every possible angle, but paying attention to detail counts as 'gathering data', right?".

Hope, still blissfully unaware of the pinkette voyeur behind the tree, rose from his seated position at the mossy bottom of the spring and stretched out in more or less the same way Lightning did before she stumbled upon her. Okay… He clearly works out. He's definitely developed the more masculine elements of his physique. she noted, getting quite a nice view of his pectorals and abs; not especially toned, but still visible—and tantalizing to her eyes. She almost let out a long whistle (When did I become such a horndog…?), but thought better of it at the last moment and managed to keep her mouth shut. It's kinda funny. Only a few years ago, I was practically babysitting the kid… Not such a kid anymore…

Lightning smiled wryly at her own scathing humor, then her gaze drifted to his arms. The muscles weren't thin and stringy, but lithe and bulged out in just the right places. Can't help but wonder what it'd be like if he held m- FOCUS, LIGHT! She let out a inaudible little sigh; she very nearly yelled out that little reminder to keep to the task at hand.

After composing herself once more, Lightning felt confident enough that she wouldn't announce herself, so she returned to her self-imposed espionage assignment. One final area of interest; Lightning licked her lips in anticipation.

Okay… Remember that you're not on a cliff; it's okay to look down… There we go, Light… Just a little more and-

"HOLY SHIT!"

Lightning quickly retreated completely behind the tree and slapped her hand to her mouth after her shout echoed and startled a couple of flocks of birds, and very likely, Hope as well.

One.

Two.

Three seconds later, and she heard absolutely nothing. Already spooked by… her own outburst (How in the hell did that even happen?) and the fact that she almost got caught, she was just about to make a run for it-

"Going somewhere?" Hope asked from right next to her, a questioning look on his face, complete with raised eyebrow. Lightning couldn't help but blink stupidly; her words had left her. Any hope she had of even attempting to explain herself (Yeah… Good luck with that, Light…) had basically gone down the shitter. Hope sighed, then closed his eyes halfway, creating an erotic look about his visage before leaning down a touch, his lips right next to her ear.

"You almost forgot your jaw." he chuckled sultrily, his breath hot as always against the sensitive cartilage. Lightning quickly closed her mouth—how long had it been hanging open like that?—and stammered a meek thank you before she tried to sneak away. No such luck.

Hope had taken a hold of her arm, gently yet firmly, and with his other hand tilted Lightning's face and pulled his own back so her eyes were aligned with his.

"You don't have to window shop, you know. If you saw something you liked, you should've just gotten it. Just remember that you have to get the whole package…" Hope said hotly.

Lightning's cheeks became rose-dusted with that little metaphor, that… corny (but hot) metaphor. But all in all, despite that sudden spike in arousal, Lightning, being Lightning, told her exactly what she thought about it: "That sounded really stupid…" Nice job, Lightning! "So I'm going to have to punish you for that little gaffe." … That's… not quite what I was going for…

But I really don't give two shits right now.

Hope's eyebrow raised again, this time in interest.

"On the battlefield, there's always a right thing to do," Lightning leaned closer to him, "and a wrong thing to do." She took a step towards him this time.

"Doing the right thing has its rewards, i.e your heart's ability to sustain your body."

Step.

"Doing the wrong thing,"

Lean.

"often ends in punishment—usually your opponent controlling whether or not your heart will be circulating blood through your body, or squirting blood out of your body… Unless you get really lucky, that is."

Step.

"In this case, you made the wrong choice, Hope."

Step.

"You tempted a starving tiger…"

Lean.

At this point, Lightning's body was flush against Hope's and her lips only a couple of fractions of an inch away from his. "Snow was the one who suggested the line! I told him it was stupid but he-" Hope tried to explain, but to no avail.

"No excuses!" And then he gulped, both frightened and aroused by Lightning's current demeanor. His little problem was initially because the spring water was admittedly quite cold; now, it was the result of the other extreme. "You saw a hungry caged tiger and you just thought it would be a good idea to dangle a juicy slab of meat right outside of that cage, didn't you? Well, guess what, Hope? This tiger is finally out of her cage… And she wants her meat…"

Before Hope could even think about arguing that her metaphor was just as lame as his was (though also just as arousing, and maybe a tad more creative), Lightning's lips had latched onto his, one hand capturing silver hair and the other resting tenderly on his cheek. One of Hope's arms hooked around Lightning's waist, pulling it more tightly against his own body—and letting her feel his hardness even more thoroughly—and the fingers of his other hand threaded through ribbons of rose silk, reacting to Lightning's kiss all the while, their lips gliding across one another's, their tongues coaxing each other forward and to continue. Just as the shifting of the tectonic plates beneath Gran Pulse could cause earthquakes, the movement of their lips against each other's caused the shaking bonds on their self-control to snap.

Hope pulled away, leaving his and Lightning's lips connected by an almost invisible thread of saliva, and roughly yanked at her hair, exposing the vulnerable skin of her neck to him.

xXx

"What are you doing, Fang…?" Vanille asked carefully, seeing her surrogate sister convulse and tremble as though holding in enormous quantities of laughter (which was precisely what she was doing), though many chuckles managed to slip through.

"Noth—krmph—Nothing, Van-Vani-hi-hi-hile!" Fang guffawed, loud, raucous laughter pouring from her lips while her knees gave out and she ended up rolling on the grass, holding her sides. She tried to hold in her laughter—she really did—but she just couldn't help it, with the inkling that her plan was going quite smoothly; she should be finding out in the next hour or two whether or not the trouble was really worth it.

"Fang." Vanille commanded, "What did you do this time?"

The girl could be pretty damn scary if she wanted to be, but Fang just couldn't take her seriously at this point! Nonetheless, she complied with her younger friend's wishes and explained everything. "Okay... Okay! Ya know how—ha ha!—ya know how Hopeless and Little Miss Sunshine are givin' each other a nasty case of blue 'nads?"

Vanille nodded slowly, silently urging Fang to finish telling her just what in Etro's name she did!

"Okay, okay! Well, get this! I suggested the whole camping trip to get 'em together!"

"I… don't quite follow…"

"Well, remember when I 'accidentally' mashed some of them mashed potatoes onto Hope's shirt while I just so happened to be holdin' the gravy train—I'll never get used to that little thing's name, I swear; looks nothin' like a train-"

Vanile made a gesture with her hand for Fang to get to the point, and the look on her face was no-nonsense.

"Fine! Fine! Well, I told Hope he should go wash up in this convenient little spring in the forest over yonder," Fang pointed to the forest in question, "that—and get this—just so happens to be Light's favorite little thinkin' spot!"

"… Oh! I get it now! So you made Lightning mad because you knew she would storm off to her thinking spot and would see Hope naked in… the… spring… MAKER HAVE MERCY, FANG! YOU'RE TERRIBLE!" Vanile gasped in horror.

"Aren't I?" Fang said, quite proud of herself, and even had the gall to wink.

"Lightning's going to massacre the boy! You know how possessive she can get when it comes to her… personal space…"

"Fifty-two gil says they both come outta there with shit-eatin' grins plastered onto their faces. Or at least that Hope does and Light just has a massive sex flush."

"Deal. Oh, I hope Hope's alright… I can only imagine what Light must be doin' to the poor guy…"

"I know I can!"

"Hush, you! Poor Hope's probably writhing in absolute agony!"

xXx

"Light…" Hope said breathlessly, moaning not even two seconds later. He was pretty damn sure he had the upper hand, but somehow, Lightning managed to knock him over when just when he got her down to her underwear and finally managed to unclasp that… godforsaken, hellish abomination known as a bra! If that wasn't enough, she managed to get her hands on him in a very intimate manner. This wasn't going quite the way he thought it would. Now, she had him at her every mercy, trembling from the feelings pulsing through every single nerve ending in his body.

"That's not my name, Hope. Say my name; my real name…" Lightning looked at him pleadingly. Oh, if only Hope knew just how often she had dreamed of hearing her name tumble from his lips, as he lost himself in ecstasy. She pumped him once, twice to see if she could make him lose it and give in to her demand, to make one of her daydreams about him come true. Okay, sure it took her a moment or two to figure out just how to touch him, but Claire Lightning Farron was nothing if not adaptable.

"Cl… Oh, Claire… Please just… just… I can't take this anymore..." Hope whimpered, "Please, Claire…?" Once he got her name to come forth from his lips, he realized just how delightful the sound was to his ears and how sweet it tasted on his tongue. Like it or not, Lightning would be Claire to Hope forevermore.

Lightning's gaze misted over after realizing that her hot little daydream had just become reality. She chuckled softly; even grown up, Hope was—on the inside—still the kid he was four years ago. "Atta boy…" she teased gently. Slowly, she released her grasp on Hope's unsatisfied member. Coming partially to his senses after unknown seconds silently ticked by—but not completely, as his lustful haze still had him seeing pink—he pounced on Lightning, pinning her down to the leaf-littered forest floor.

"It's… my turn now." Hope practically purred.

Once more, Hope graced Lightning's neck with the touch of his lips. Gentle butterfly kisses at first, but then began to linger until he was suckling and softly nipping at the soft flesh. Lightning sucked in air through her teeth as though in pain, but Hope wasn't stupid; he knew better. She was trying to keep quiet. "C'mon, Claire. Just let it all go…" he whispered into the reddening flesh of her neck before pressing a quick chaste kiss to help soothe it; Lightning's breath hitched in her throat at that final bit of contact with her neck.

His lips moved lower, stopping to nip at her collarbone for a short moment, but then lifted his head so he could fully remove Lightning's accursed bra (stupid thing took him too damn long to freakin' open...), and he gazed at the sensuous curve of her breasts. Lightning didn't cover her chest—her arms, hands, and even her fingers refused to twitch with anxiety—nor did Hope think she would. Lightning was always… so sure of herself. Alright, she may have had her moments of self-doubt, but at least she was always comfortable in her own skin. That definitely counted for something.

Hope really wasn't quite sure where to start, so he just played it by ear and placed his hand over one of the tender, fleshy hills. After that though, he just… froze.

Lightning's eyes softened, knowing that Hope was just as much of a virgin as she was. "It's alright. You don't have to be nervous; just give it a squeeze. I'll let you know if you're doing it right." she murmured. Hope did as instructed and applied some pressure to her breast, prompting a soft breathy moan from the woman beneath him. Beginning to feel more courageous, he thumbed her nipple, causing her to release another moan, louder this time.

Hope's touch upon her breast was setting Lightning's nerves on fire, was causing acid to pool low in her belly, the burn both pleasant and torturous. "It's not like I don't have other sensitive spots…" Lightning whispered sensually, expressing her impatience without appearing annoyed.

Hope trailed his fingers down to Lightning's belly button, teasingly toying with the piercing adorning it.

"Hope!"

"Oh… Sorry…" Once again, he reverted to his child-like self for a moment, a blush creeping over the bridge of his nose. Lightning scoffed quietly and surrounded his neck with her arms, dragging him back to her sinful lips and tainting him with her kisses. She grasped his hand, which still lay on her breast, and guided it to her still concealed womanhood. Hope's arm jerked, but Lightning made sure it didn't move from that spot. When Hope finally relaxed enough to part his lips from hers, Lightning whispered a simple command though it sounded more like a soft plea, "Touch me, Hope…"

Hope nodded almost absentmindedly. He was just… taking in that it was all real and not one of his own little fantasies. He shook his head to bring himself back out of his racing thoughts and with his lowered hand slowly slid Lightning's panties off of her hips, then down her thighs and off of her calves…

In Etro's name, she's gorgeous…

He couldn't help but take it all in, to take in just how beautiful this woman was, and the fact that he would be making love to her very soon. He was going to just take her rough and fast, but he had a chance to cool down a touch, and he was glad he did. "You're so beautiful, Claire…" Hope breathed.

Lightning blushed and her eyes closed for a moment before slivering open seconds later, but otherwise made no other indication that she heard him. "Please touch me…" she repeated, her voice laced with a sense of urgency. Hope nodded once more and then softly touched the petals of her womanhood, rubbing his fingertips against her wet folds and the pulsing nub at their apex. Lightning closed her eyes and let out an almost sobbing moan.

"… Now, Hope. I need you now." She opened spread her legs further and tightly grasped Hope's arm to emphasize just how much she wanted him. Hope sighed inwardly; he was hoping to explore her a lot more, but she wanted him, and damn it all, he wanted her! He positioned himself at her entrance and slowly pushed in, softly moaning her name once he felt himself unified with her.

"Move, Hope."

"But doesn't it-"

"That's just a stupid myth, now move, please." Lightning clawed roughly at Hope's back in the hopes that he would get the message. Almost immediately, he pulled out most of the way, then thrust back into her, starting out slow so they could get used to the new intimate contact. As they fell into the rhythm he went faster, enjoying the burn his muscles felt as they strained and tightened; each and every one of Lightning's moans drove him to continue on. The melodic sound was intoxicating, addicting. Soon enough, Lightning began to raise her hips to meet Hope's every time they rejoined.

Her moans became more frequent, higher in pitch. Then her moans became mostly pleasured wails with occasional moans interspersed, and Hope allowed himself to add to this private symphony.

Not too long from when they first coalesced, they could both feel something—the end— approaching. Lightning's voice started to rise in a wail once more, but Hope muffled the song with his lips and clasped her hand, squeezing her hand reassuringly and his moan mixing with her cry when they both approached completion, their essences and their breaths mixing. Slowly, Hope released her lips, both of their breaths continuing to mingle while they panted, the rough breaths alone speaking untold volumes of their happiness and satisfaction.

xXx

"It's almost sunset, Fang!"

"I know~"

"Fang!"

"Don't be such a bother, Vanille! They're coming this way and- HOLY SHIT IN A HEAVENLY TOILET! PAY UP, VANILLE!"

"Don't lie just so you can filch fifty-two gil from me."

"Double or nothin' says they really are walkin' right towards us."

"Deal, but only because they aren't… really right… here?" Vanille moaned in disappointment and smacked her hand to her face exasperatedly.

"Next time I'm about to accept one of your bets, Fang, please just whack me with a mallet…"

"I think those only cure Silence; not the other way 'round…"

"I know. Don't remind me…"

Lightning looked oddly at the two Gran Pulsians, fully clothed, but her face and shoulders still quite rosy. Hope… had a really big smile, a "shit-eating grin" if Fang ever did see one.

"Hey, guys! I got din… ner?"

Snow came up to the group, a big fish in one hand, and Serah holding the other. "Did we miss something…?" he inquired, cocking his head to the side.

"Fang?"

"What? I had to keep everyone else occupied, okay?"

"Well, if Snow and Serah are here, what in the world did you make Sazh do?" Vanille asked, panicking a bit.

"I had him-"

"Help! HELP! I'm getting too damn old for this! HELP!"

And as if on cue, Sazh appeared near the horizon, hanging onto the reins for dear life as a chocobo dragged him along the ground. Poor guy didn't even get to finish saddling up the thing.

"wrangle chocobos for transportation…" Fang finished with a nervous chuckle, "Moving on~"

"FANG!"

Fang never thought the sound of everyone shouting her name in unison could be so awkward.