Impossible

I wasn't sure what to think. Adam and I had a strained relationship at best. He and I had been through hell, but unable to make it back. I was with him when the whole thing with Amy was going down, and despite our best efforts we hadn't been able to make it through. He said he wanted me here tonight and he said that he wanted Olivia to come with me. He didn't like our daughter around the business very much. He didn't want her to get scared since she was only almost five.

"Adam, why did you want me here so much?" I asked. Honestly I could only imagine the answer to that. He could be so unpredictable sometimes.

"Syd, you're going to have to wait. I just wanted you to be here live," Adam said. I noticed something different about him. I had for the last few weeks, but I haven't been able to put my finger on it. He didn't seem quite like his normal self, like there was something weighing on him. Now it was a little different.

I'd heard a few of the rumors, but I knew that it couldn't be true. Adam would pretty much die before he retired. He lived and breathed this business and had for longer than I had known him. It was more important to him than pretty much everything aside from his mom. Even Liv was tied for the importance of wrestling. She was okay with it since Adam was always there when she absolutely needed him, but she knew that in a few hours he was going to leave again. I knew that it had to be hard for her. I couldn't begin to imagine how hard it would be. My brothers were wrestlers, but they were around for much of my childhood and I still always had my dad. I was really blessed to have a dad that always made me and my brothers first no matter what, even when my mom was sick, and eventually died.

"Adam, I left everything behind for this. I freaking cancelled a show tonight. I have a career, too," I said. The mystery was killing me; I didn't like surprises from him. They were pretty much the bane of my existence. I sure as hell hoped that this was important. He rarely ever asked things like this of me. He pretty much let me do my own thing. Well, when we had to talk things were good. For a long time things were very strained with us. It took a long time for the wounds from our relationship to heal, at least on my part.

"I know Syd, I know. I promise this is something that you wouldn't want me to tell you over the phone," Adam said. I rolled my eyes at him. I wish he would just give me a clue. I hate not knowing. I had a bad track record with surprised with that man.

I also did miss a lot. I was trying to make a name for myself as a singer. I had done so many other things and that was something that I really wanted to accomplish. It wasn't long before I saw other people I had known since before Olivia was born, well a few others I had met along the way and they had become my extended family.

I hung out for a little while with John Cena who was one of my absolute best friends that was still in the WWE. He and I had been friends for a longer than I care to remember. He always made me feel awesome, especially through the drama that has come and gone through the last several years.

I stopped and watched as I heard Adam's music starting. I knew that whatever was going down this was the big moment. I also knew that there was a hint of sadness in him when he went down to the ring. Most people wouldn't have known it, but have spent the last 11 years with the man. I've been either romantically involved with him, or had to deal with him on some personal capacity pretty much my entire adult life. (Even a little before that, but that's not something we really share.) I knew things about the man that most people would never have imagined.

"Mama, what's Daddy gonna do?" Liv asked when I picked her up to watch. Adam had promised that he wasn't going to get attacked or anything tonight.

"I dunno baby, Daddy said it was a surprise," I told her honestly as Adam started talking.

I listened to what he was saying, and as soon as he admitted that he had to retire or risk permanent injury. I never would have imagined him making that choice, nor would I have actually imagined him actually doing it. He didn't really say it directly, but you could tell that he had some personal reasons for making the choice that he did. I knew that he wanted to be able to enjoy Olivia's childhood and do all the normal things that fathers do with their daughters. I went pretty much onto autopilot after that. It was very much surreal for me. Wrestling was the only thing that he was truly passionate about.

"Mama, is Daddy really not going to wrestle anymore?" Olivia asked.

"It sounds like it, but you're going to have to ask Daddy, sweetie," I said still trying to process what Adam was finishing saying. It wasn't long before he as in the back saying goodbye to people. He made sure the cameras were off before coming over to Olivia and me. He gave me a quick hug. Then he scooped Olivia up and gave her a giant hug.

"Daddy, are you gonna really tire?" she asked.

"Yeah, baby, I am. I'm gonna get more time to spend with you, and we can do lots of fun things," Adam told her. I loved watching them have moments like this. It was so priceless.

"Really?" Olivia asked with wide eyes.

"I promise, baby," Adam said.

I felt like I was watching the Titanic sink. Hearing him promise something to her was the moment that it truly sunk in for me. He was really going to take medical advice. It felt like the end of an era, and in a way it was.