1 Chapter One: A Good Haircut Gone Wrong
~*Author's Note*~ The idea for this story actually came from my eight year old sister who adores Legolas as much as I do! She can actually be very smart when she wants too…. The first chapter sux, but it'll get better, I promise. But read and be afraid, and REVIEW PLEASE!!!! I LOVE REVIEWS, LOVE THEM MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF!!!! Anyway, also read my other Legolas story I wrote called Two Ugly Sisters. It's hilarious, I promise you! ^_^ Enjoy!!! Warning: This story contains shameless self-insertion. (but it comes later)
Legolas sighed, running his hands over his well-worn bow. Even for all the excitement in his life, it seemed that there was another profession calling to him other than saving the world, something cleaner, purer, more innocent…. Aragorn approached Legolas who was sitting on the grass, lost in thought. "Something the matter my friend?" he asked quietly, laying a comforting hand on his shoulder. Legolas looked up at him wordlessly and sighed heavily once again.
"You know Aragorn…" he trailed off. "We have been friends for a long time, right? And you would support me in anything I did, right?" Aragorn nodded, unsure of where Legolas was heading. "What if I told you I wanted to leave The Fellowship?" he asked.
"Leave-" Aragorn interrupted.
"Yes. To become…" Legolas paused dramatically before going on. "A hairdresser."
"A….hairdresser?" Aragorn choked out.
"Yes. See, it all started many years ago…'
~* Flashback*~
(Legolas is narrating) "You see, I've always been proud of my hair….using the best L'Oreal shampoos and conditioners, John Frieda styling balm and frizz control lotion, deep conditioning treatments once a month, weakly split end appointments, straightening gels, flattening irons-"
"Legolas, I get the picture." Interrupted Aragorn, disrupting Legolas' flashback.
"Don't disrupt my flashback"
"Sorry."
"Anyways…."
(A Little Legolas *ain't he adorable?* with perfectly straight blonde hair hops into a hairdresser's chair as the person puts on one of those bib thingys so the hair doesn't fall all over you on Little Legolas. Little Legolas smiles as the hairdresser starts to clip, but then cuts more hair, and more hair, and more hair, and more hair…well, you get the picture. The hairdresser grins and hands Little Legolas a mirror, and when he looks into it. HE SCREAMS!!! All his beautiful, perfectly straightened, L'Oreal shampoo and conditioner using, frizz control lotion filled hair is chopped off into a horrible buzz cut with some hair sticking randomly out in the sides! Little Legolas screams, and screams, and screams, and screams, and screams, and screams………….)
~*End Flashback*~
"So you see Aragorn," ended Legolas, "after that traumatizing experience I wanted more than anything to become a good hairdresser, to rid the world of horrible haircuts FOREVER!!!! But it was not meant to be. So now Aragorn, I ask you, as a friend, as a BROTHER, let me follow….my dream" Legolas got that starry look in his eyes and stared out at the horizon like in those really cheesy movies. Aragorn looked at him weirdly, thinking that his friend needed a mental hospital, and badly.
"Ummm…..ok." said Aragorn, thinking that maybe a break would really help Legolas out. Legolas leapt up and rapturously hugged Aragorn before calling out to the rest of the fellowship, almost jumping up and down in happiness.
"EVERYONE!!" he bellowed out, slinging an arm around Aragorn's shoulders as Aragorn himself rolled his eyes. "I'M GOING TO BECOME A HAIRDRESSER!!!"
~*Author's Note*~ The idea for this story actually came from my eight year old sister who adores Legolas as much as I do! She can actually be very smart when she wants too…. The first chapter sux, but it'll get better, I promise. But read and be afraid, and REVIEW PLEASE!!!! I LOVE REVIEWS, LOVE THEM MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF!!!! Anyway, also read my other Legolas story I wrote called Two Ugly Sisters. It's hilarious, I promise you! ^_^ Enjoy!!! Warning: This story contains shameless self-insertion. (but it comes later)
Legolas sighed, running his hands over his well-worn bow. Even for all the excitement in his life, it seemed that there was another profession calling to him other than saving the world, something cleaner, purer, more innocent…. Aragorn approached Legolas who was sitting on the grass, lost in thought. "Something the matter my friend?" he asked quietly, laying a comforting hand on his shoulder. Legolas looked up at him wordlessly and sighed heavily once again.
"You know Aragorn…" he trailed off. "We have been friends for a long time, right? And you would support me in anything I did, right?" Aragorn nodded, unsure of where Legolas was heading. "What if I told you I wanted to leave The Fellowship?" he asked.
"Leave-" Aragorn interrupted.
"Yes. To become…" Legolas paused dramatically before going on. "A hairdresser."
"A….hairdresser?" Aragorn choked out.
"Yes. See, it all started many years ago…'
~* Flashback*~
(Legolas is narrating) "You see, I've always been proud of my hair….using the best L'Oreal shampoos and conditioners, John Frieda styling balm and frizz control lotion, deep conditioning treatments once a month, weakly split end appointments, straightening gels, flattening irons-"
"Legolas, I get the picture." Interrupted Aragorn, disrupting Legolas' flashback.
"Don't disrupt my flashback"
"Sorry."
"Anyways…."
(A Little Legolas *ain't he adorable?* with perfectly straight blonde hair hops into a hairdresser's chair as the person puts on one of those bib thingys so the hair doesn't fall all over you on Little Legolas. Little Legolas smiles as the hairdresser starts to clip, but then cuts more hair, and more hair, and more hair, and more hair…well, you get the picture. The hairdresser grins and hands Little Legolas a mirror, and when he looks into it. HE SCREAMS!!! All his beautiful, perfectly straightened, L'Oreal shampoo and conditioner using, frizz control lotion filled hair is chopped off into a horrible buzz cut with some hair sticking randomly out in the sides! Little Legolas screams, and screams, and screams, and screams, and screams, and screams………….)
~*End Flashback*~
"So you see Aragorn," ended Legolas, "after that traumatizing experience I wanted more than anything to become a good hairdresser, to rid the world of horrible haircuts FOREVER!!!! But it was not meant to be. So now Aragorn, I ask you, as a friend, as a BROTHER, let me follow….my dream" Legolas got that starry look in his eyes and stared out at the horizon like in those really cheesy movies. Aragorn looked at him weirdly, thinking that his friend needed a mental hospital, and badly.
"Ummm…..ok." said Aragorn, thinking that maybe a break would really help Legolas out. Legolas leapt up and rapturously hugged Aragorn before calling out to the rest of the fellowship, almost jumping up and down in happiness.
"EVERYONE!!" he bellowed out, slinging an arm around Aragorn's shoulders as Aragorn himself rolled his eyes. "I'M GOING TO BECOME A HAIRDRESSER!!!"