This my friends is just a little spoof taking the mick, it is not here to offend anyone, I do not own Harry Potter and last but not least please enjoy!

Harry stared in shock at the dragon before him the Triwizard tournament didn't seem any more fun that it had yesterday, he braced himself spell on his lips to summon his Firebolt when Cedric Diggory jumped in front of him. "Are you people insane! He can't compete whilst he's pregnant!"

Pregnant what the-?

He looked down in horror finding himself indeed bloated like a whale! He must be like nearly ready to give birth on the other hand WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!

He didn't remember being pregnant this morning, plus he's a guy, you kinda remember these two things. Draco Malfoy vaulted over the stands "Don't worry lover I'm coming!"

He may have said this once before but WHAT THE HELL!

Malfoy and Diggory kept their wants on the dragon that was roaring fiercely, Malfoy looked at him "Harry get to safety with our baby we'll hold her off!"

Stunned he gaped at the heroism "Bu-"

Cedric yelled at the stands "OY BOY WHO COULD NOT BE BOTHERED! HELP US!"

Neville yawned in boredom "This doesn't involve Voldermort therefore I have no desire to get involved."

Wait was that a scar on Neville's forehead!

And where did the dramatic wind and sunset come from?

Hagrid had a huge pink Umbrella above his head which he used to float into the stands, Fred (Or George), "Said Wave!"

So the spectators Mexican waved "HARRY POTTER!"

Rita Skeeter appeared at his side "So Mr Potter what do you think of your father in law being an alleged Death Eater?"

Cho Chang screamed "EE! LOVE YOU CEDRIC!"

Cedric waved at her "Love you too babe! Don't forget the toys for tonight!"

Cho giggled "As if I'd forget the dragon riding crop and the blood quills!"

Harry did not want to know but she also yelled "AND DRARRY FOREVER!"

Pansy Parkinson looked disgusted "Drarry! Ew no! Snaco would be an improvement over that!"

"But Snape's Draco's godfather!"

"So's Sirius to Harry but there's still pairings of them in our club!"

"OO! Draco and Harry are together so why don't we put their godfather's together!"

"SQEE! But I have a soft spot for Remus and Sirius!"

The argument went on whilst Harry decided the whole wizarding world had gone mad!

The dragon roared again charging towards them, Cedric fired off spells with Malfoy, Rita Skeeter took photos, McGonagal fussed and screeched at Dumbledore, who for some reason was wearing a Jamaican beanie, to get his doped up arse into gear and rescue them. The Triwizard officials looked unimpressed, Voldermort and a group of Death Eaters appeared causing the spectators to make that 'Ooooo' noise they do in sitcoms, Voldermort saying "This is the end Neville Longbottom!"

Neville jumped up dramatically "It's you! I shall avenge you for making parents Crazy you nose-less ninny!"

Lucius gasped "Oh no he didn't!"

A laughing track appeared from nowhere, Neville glared "Yeah take it bitch!"

Voldermort started singing spontaneously "I'm malicious mean and scary, my sneer could curdle dairy, and violence-wise my hands are not the cleanest. But despite my evil look and my temper and my cursed book, I've always yearned to be a concert pianist. Can't you see me on the stage performin' mozart ticklin' the ivories 'til they gleam? Yep i'd rather be called deadly for my killer show tune medley, thank you 'cause way down deep inside I've got a dream."

The Death eaters started backing him up "He's got a dream, He's got a dream."

Voldermort continued "See I ain't as cruel and vicious as I seem because like everybody else I've got a dream"

And in all that chaos all Harry could say was "I think my waters just broke."

Harry jerked up from the library chair with a gasp, he checked his stomach making sure it was flat as ever and ran a weary hand over his face. Next time Neville tried to force feed him Gillyweed he was going to chuck him to the giant squid wrapped in fish.

That dream was seriously messed up.