Disclaimer: It depresses me a little more every time I have to explain that I don't own anything, but still don't.
Spoilers: Up to 2x18 Dog Eat Dog
A/N: After the latest episode, Kelly Parker is my freaking favorite character in the history of ever! With this, I tried to mesh Fic!KP with Show!KP and, let's face it, Nicky belongs to the fandom. Oh, and the timeline doesn't perfectly match the show, but whatevs. This is a bunch of fic ideas I had crammed into one awesome Nickelly Monster. The show can do absolutely anything and I'd still stick with this imaginary ship. Nickelly forever.
-XX-
Stumbles and Stutters
2009
"Fall! Fall! You're going to fall!"
Practicing on beam, Kelly Parker easily keeps her focus despite being yelled at. She takes a deep breath, visuals the dismount, executes and her feet stick to the mat, arms raised in a perfect salute. The expected slow clap, Nicky Russo pretending he isn't impressed. This is how they spend their Saturday nights. Together. In the gym. Training.
"You suck at that," Kelly points out. "Honestly, Nick, no one is going to be standing there and screaming at me while I'm on beam at Nationals, but I can guarantee there are going to be a dozen girls trying to get into my head."
"Girls and mind games, keep me out." Nicky sits at a bench and Kelly goes to sit with him. "By the way, I know you're going to make the national team and you obviously know you're going to make the national team so you can stop stressing. You killed it at the Classic and you've got Nationals in the bag."
"Easy for you to say. You aren't the one competing," Kelly says in a voice softer than her usual. Nicky looks away like he doesn't want to talk about it. He never does. Frowning, Kelly runs a finger down his forearm and across his wrapped wrist.
"Don't worry about me. Next year it's mine for sure," Nicky says with that bit of arrogance required for a gymnast.
Kelly rolls her eyes. "Who said I was worried about you?"
"Right. God forbid," he says, nudging her with his shoulder. Nicky gives her a smile and nods to the door. "You ready to go?"
"Um, I'm not going anywhere with you."
Nicky looks up at the ceiling and sighs. "Let me guess. Your mom's in town?"
"Of course she is. She has to make sure I'm physically and mentally prepared," Kelly says matter-of-factly. "Nationals is only two months away and—"
"And the last thing you need is me distracting you," Nicky says. He's heard it so many times. It's almost as deeply drilled into him as it is into her. "Maybe we should keep a twenty feet radius between us at all times. Stand too close and your mom could probably sniff it out."
"Oh God, you're being ridiculous," Kelly scoffs. "What next? You demand I choose between you and my mother?"
"Like she hasn't told you to choose before," Nicky mumbles. He stands and turns away from her, reaching for his bag. "No. You know what? You should tell her to choose between being your mom and your manager."
"Nick," Kelly stands and puts her hand between his shoulder blades. "Let it go."
Looking around a nearly empty Denver Elite and seeing the coast clear, Nicky runs his fingers down the length of her arm, their fingers tangling for a brief second before letting go.
"Just don't let her control you, Kel."
Kelly gives him a confident smile. "If I did, Russo, you wouldn't be within fifty feet of me."
He looks at her in this goofy sort of Nick-way and Kelly hates how it makes her stomach do this weird sort of thing. Nicky grabs her Denver Elite Gymnastics jacket from off the bench and wraps it around her shoulders, drawing her closer. Kelly looks around nervously, afraid someone might see.
"Don't," she warns him.
But he does. He leans in and lightly kisses her cheek.
Sometimes it scares Kelly how sweet he can be. Sometimes she wishes he were a jerk that treated her like crap and bragged about how easy she is. It would make it easier to stop this whatever-this-is. As distant and moody as Nicky is at times, he's also really great and doesn't treat her like she's just some slut he's banging. Sometimes Kelly is convinced he treats her better than she deserves.
…
"I think this National Champion thing is getting to your head."
Kelly Parker, the 2009 National Champion shows no shame and just smirks, pausing at her bedroom door to look at Nicky behind her. He tries to appear indifferent, but Kelly knows he's dying to smile. She knows he's proud of her without having to say it.
"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard you say."
"Did you not see that giant bus in your driveway?" Nicky asks. "This might be news to you, Parks, but the average person doesn't have their own bus let alone one with their face on it."
"I'm not the average person."
"Right," Nicky's voice drop low as he wraps his arms around her waist. "You're Kelly Fucking Parker. Taking over the world one gold medal at a time. We're all doomed."
"Sounds perfect." Kelly smiles.
Like hell she'd ever recognize it for what it is, but it always makes her nervous in those few heart stopping seconds before he kisses her. It's all slow motion. The way his lips pull back in a slight smile and how his eyes switch between hers and her lips before he finally leans in and their lips brush. From there, things move way too fast and it's exhilarating.
The kisses become rougher and hotter, bare hands against bare skin, bare skin against bare skin. They make their way into her dark bedroom. Sitting on the edge of her bed with him standing in front of her, Kelly reaches for the buckle of his belt, but Nicky stops her, looking around like he expects someone to pop out of the closet and catch them. That's one thing they could do without—the constant paranoia.
"We're home alone. Now c'mere."
Kelly pulls him down by his shirttail and kisses him with her lips parted. The next time their mouths separate it's only long enough to get Nicky out of his shirt and Kelly out of hers. They've done this so many times before. Sometimes Kelly inwardly freaks, afraid he'll get bored and want to move on and she won't be able to. By the way he moans when she arches her back and grinds her hips into his, it doesn't seem like he will any time soon.
At one point Kelly swears she hears something like a door slam, but Nicky has his arm hooked around the back of her knee, his fingers trailing up and down her thigh beneath her floral skirt as he presses wet, lingering kisses starting at her hip and across her flat stomach. Moaning, all Kelly can think about is finally getting him out of his jeans and her out of this stupid bra when everything goes wrong.
"Kelly, sweetie! My meeting didn't last as long as I thought it would so I was thinking we could—" Suddenly the door opens all the way and the light snaps on. Not good. "What is going on here?"
Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit.
Nicky nearly falls off the side of the bed when he scrambles to get off of her and Kelly quickly reaches for her top and haphazardly pulls it over her head, hair a mess and lips swollen. Nicky fails in that department and only manages to stare blankly at the woman in the doorway.
"Mom!" Kelly's voice trembles. "I thought—"
"No. This isn't happening!" Sheila Buboyan shouts. Holy crap does she look pissed. The woman steps into the room, her face red with anger, and shakes a fist at Nicky. "You. Get. Out!"
That's enough of a cue for Nicky who grabs his t-shirt and puts it back on, inside out and backwards. Smoothing her skirt down her legs, Kelly slides off the edge of her bed so she's between Nicky and Sheila.
"Mom, don't you think you're—"
Slap.
Sheila slaps Kelly straight across the face and watching it all, Nicky is livid. He gently takes hold of Kelly's arm and pulls her back towards him. Kelly looks shocked, like she can't believe her mom just did that.
"Don't you touch her," Nicky growls.
Sheila looks appalled he would even attempt to speak to her. "Me? She's my daughter. Don't even try to tell me what I can and cannot do. Now if you didn't hear me the first time I said GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"
Nicky isn't phased by the way Sheila yells at him and moved in front of Kelly like a human shield while Kelly stands there, dazed. "What? So you can smack her around some more? No way am I leaving."
Sheila looks like she could burst any second. "Get our or I'll have the police drag you out."
"Nick," Kelly says, gently touching his shoulder. "Go."
Nicky looks back at Kelly, worried. "No."
"I'll be fine. Go," she says though he still seems reluctant. "Nick, if you don't go she will call the cops and I can't name a single Olympic team gymnast will a criminal record."
"Juvi or community service if anything," Nicky assures her. "Then I'll have it expunged. My dad knows a great lawyer."
"Nick." Kelly tugs on his arm so he'll face her. "I'm serious."
All his anger disappears from his face when he looks at Kelly and she's begging him with her eyes to not make this harder than it has to be. Momentarily conflicted, Nicky's thumb skims down her reddening cheek and he nods. Kelly can get him to do anything with that face and they both know it.
"Nicky Russo," Sheila has to ruin their moment, "don't even think of kissing her right now."
Eyes glazed, Kelly nods for him to leave and Nicky nods back. On his way to the door, as he passes Sheila, Nicky can't help himself and murmurs something about how he'll be sure to tell Dr. Parker Sheila said hi the next time he sees him. Once he's gone, Sheila snarls and Kelly stares out the door.
"Kelly Parker," her mother sneers, "you wipe that stupid lovesick look off your face now."
"Mom…"
"Ugh. I can't even look at you right now," she says in disgust, waving her hands in the air and going to the door. "The first chance we get, I'm taking you to the doctor. There's no telling where that boy has been."
…
You're pregnant.
Worst two word combination in the entire English fucking language.
If the doctor hadn't been in the room Kelly is certain her mom would have smacked again and harder this time. Her doctor had been clearly taken aback by Sheila's lightening quick reflexes when asking about the termination protocol without even asking Kelly what she wants. Kelly isn't surprised. It's always been this way.
Still a little shaken, but doing her job, the doctor explained how they would go about doing it. Kelly doesn't think she took a single breath the entire consultation. Sheila had been eager to pencil in the soonest appointment with a physician, but Kelly's doctor had insisted they take a couple days to think it through.
In all truth, there's nothing to think through. This is the only way. What is she supposed to do? Give up her dream and ruin Nicky's dream, be stuck with a kid when she's still a kid herself? That isn't an option whatsoever. Kelly knows this yet Sheila still insists on drilling it into her.
"Kelly, how could you be so stupid?" They're in the cold living room of their cold house and Kelly just sits there, completely still, as her mom paces. "Everything we have spent your entire life building and you almost threw it away for a boy? The Russo boy? Don't you see what's going on here? Kelly, all you are is an opportunity to him. He sees your status and he used his boyish charm to get a hold of your coattail and get his fifteen minutes of fame."
"You're wrong," Kelly says sharply. She hasn't spoken a single word since they left the doctor's office, but she isn't just going to sit here and listen to her mom spew lies about Nicky. "He wouldn't want it if he didn't get it himself. Nick isn't like that."
"He's of the Y chromosome, Kelly. They're all like that," Sheila says spitefully. "Take your father for instance, just up and abandoning his family for some bleach blonde whore with breast implants. They're all the same."
"Would you listen to yourself?" Kelly sneers. "Nick isn't like dad!"
Sheila stops her pacing and turns with eyes that lock on her daughter. She pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose and looks like a wild animal about to kill. Kelly will bitch out random people on the street, priests and nuns even, but she never raises her voice at her mother.
"What did you say to me?"
Kelly turns her eyes down to the carpet. "I—I…"
"You what?" she venomously spits. "What is this boy to you anyways? Your boyfriend? You know you aren't allowed to date."
"No," Kelly nearly whimpers. "No. He isn't my boyfriend. We just…"
"You're just screwing around," her mom finishes for her. Clicking her tongue, Sheila steps closer and Kelly presses her back hard against the chair, trying to get away but unable to. "Two naïve, hormonal teenagers who just can't help themselves? That's pathetic, Kelly. I thought I raised you to be better."
Kelly tries not to cry as her mother's words hit her and presses her lips into a tight, straight line to keep her bottom lip from trembling. She doesn't know how to explain her relationship with Nicky because she's never had to before. It's just how things have always been with them. It's always been kept between them…until now.
"Are you in love with him?"
Kelly feels her breath hitch and her glassy eyes shoot over to her mom. Her answer must show on her face because without her even saying it, Sheila shakes her head in disappointment. From everything Kelly has heard and read and seen in romantic comedies, you aren't supposed to feel ashamed about being in love; however, with the way Sheila is looking at her, Kelly feels exactly that.
"So what do you want to do, Kelly?" Sheila sighs heavily, yet again adjusting her glasses. Kelly doesn't get asked this a lot so she knows to be careful. "Here. Why don't you call the boy and give him the good news that he's going to be a da-da." Sheila picks up the cordless phone and tosses it into Kelly's lap. "I'm sure the future Olympian will be ecstatic that he knocked up some girl who isn't even his girlfriend."
Kelly grips the phone tight in her hand, trying to fight the urge to completely fall apart while Sheila goes on, "I'm sure he'll be eager to start a family with you, but then he'll have to take out a job to support you and his child and that won't leave much time to train. And you, well, with the changes your body will go through, not to mention your reputation, you know your gymnastics career would be down the toilet. It's just sad that all your potential is going to waste, but at least you'll have love."
"Okay, stop it," Kelly desperately pleas. "I get it. You made your point. I'll do it."
"Good girl. Now, I might have talked off-the-record with someone on the inside of the NGO and he's willing to help us out and keep it quiet. No one has to know." Sheila tries to hide her smile, but it shines through. She sits beside Kelly and the gymnast goes rigid. Putting on a frown, Sheila wraps an arm around her daughter.
"Kelly, I'm only trying to show you that your actions have consequences. Luckily, you have me to guide you. Sweetie, don't be sad. You know I only want what's best for you and being a teen mom isn't it. All I've ever wanted is to build a safe, perfect bubble of a world for you, push out all else and focus on your dream. I can still do that. I will fight to the death to make this bubble a reality for you, but it's your responsibility to stay in line. You understand, right?"
"Yes," Kelly chokes on her tears as her mother strokes her dark hair. "I understand, mom."
…
She just disappears and it freaks Nicky the fuck out.
The next day she doesn't answer his calls and on Monday in the gym she doesn't show. Kelly always shows. Even the time she got strep and the doctor told her to stay away Kelly was in the gym, sitting on the sidelines, glaring at the girls able to train. So, especially after seeing her mom explode, you can imagine his paranoia when Kelly doesn't come to the gym and still doesn't answer his calls or texts.
When an entire week goes by and Nicky still has no idea if Kelly is alive or not, he takes matters into his own hands. He marches straight up to her front door and rings the bell, praying Sheila doesn't have Kelly locked up, starving in the basement. Nicky hopes it's Kelly who answers the door, but of course life is never that easy.
Sheila peeks through the curtains and she doesn't look happy. A moment later, the door swings open and, Christ, this lady is scary. "What do you want?"
"Hi," Nicky says, reminding himself not to accidentally call her Mrs. Parker. "Is Kelly home?"
"What a stupid question. Of course she's home. Where else would she be?"
"Can I, um, see her?"
"No," Sheila says bluntly. "She doesn't want to see you."
Nicky squares his shoulders to let her know that he's serious. "With all due respect, ma'am, I'd like to hear that from Kelly. It would only take a second."
Sheila looks back into the house for a moment before she steps outside and shuts the door after her. Everything fiber in Nicky is telling him to run, but his need to see that Kelly is okay manages to tip the scale.
With a low hiss, Shelia asks, "Don't you think you've done enough damage?"
"Damage?" Nicky blinks. "Look, I'm sorry about the other night—"
"Let me ask you this," Sheila cuts him off, "How long has this been going on between you and my daughter? Let's face it. Neither of you seriously wanted a relationship. At least, Kelly didn't. So how long did you expect it to continue? Until someone better came along? Until you got caught? Well, newsflash, punk, you just did."
He tenses. The only thing that makes him angrier than the fact that she's calling him out on this is that he doesn't know how to answer.
"The truth is that Kelly is a star. She's destined to go to the Olympics, win gold and become an international icon," Sheila explains. Her expression darkens. "Meaningless sex with a boy like you is not apart of the plan. I've talked to her and we both agreed that you're a liability and she won't have contact with you anymore. If you know what's good for you, you'll stop trying to see her. If not, we won't hesitate to file a restraining order."
"No," Nicky says with disbelief. "There's no way Kelly would agree to that."
"Oh honey, she suggested it," Sheila insists. "I haven't taken away her phone. I haven't forbid her from talking to you. She could have answered your calls if she wanted to, but she didn't. She made that decision all on her own. And a smart decision if you ask me."
"This is insane," Nicky says. He backs away from Sheila and looks up at the house. "Kelly! Parks, are you in there!"
"You will shut your mouth before the neighbors hear," Sheila shushes him.
"You can't do this," Nicky says. "Just let me talk to her. She…she's my best friend."
"She is nothing to you and you better get used to the idea because you are nothing to her," Sheila whispers and it's like a punch to the gut. "Now, you have five minutes to get off my property and then I call the Denver PD."
Sheila walks back into her house and slams the door unnecessarily hard. When he's walking away, Nicky looks up at the house and sees Kelly through the window. Despite the distance, Nicky manages to hold her gaze and it gives him chills. So cold. Kelly then walks away and the light turns off in her room. Nicky just goes on his way, sulking.
…
When everything is done and she's taken the appropriate amount of bed rest, Kelly finally goes back to Denver Elite, ready to get her life back. After all, she is the National Champion and Worlds is quickly approaching. The truth is that she doesn't feel anything. No sadness, no regret, not even relief. She's just empty.
Right around lunch on her first day back, Kelly walks down the main hall when she feels a hang pull her into the storage room. Kelly panics for a second until she realizes it's Nicky. Then an entirely different type of apprehension sets in.
"What are you doing?" Kelly shrieks. "Get your hands off of me!"
"Why have you been avoiding me?" Nicky asks. His voice is half fear and half desperation. She'd point it out to him if the hurt look on his face didn't cut straight through her.
Trying to be as casual as she can, Kelly shrugs. "It's no big deal."
"No big deal? I've been worried about you…" Nicky's face softens and he reaches out to touch her cheek. It's almost as if it never happened. "Are you okay? She didn't do anything, right?"
"Can you not?" Kelly knocks his hand away from her. "Stop looking at me like that. It's not like my mom is abusing me or something."
"Kelly, she hit you."
"Because she caught us in bed about to fuck," Kelly says with such cold detachment. "Honestly, if I were her I would have smacked me too. She could have done a lot worse and she sure as hell wanted to and we're both lucky she didn't. Now are we done here? I have time to makeup for."
"Why have you been gone so long?"
"My ankle," she replies. By the look on his face, Nicky isn't buying it. "You can believe me or not. Either way I don't care and I don't have time to stand around and have a staring contest."
"Kelly, what's going on?" Nicky asks. "You don't answer your phone. I went over to your house and your mom is talking about restraining orders? You've been dodging me all morning. Look, I'm sorry about what happened that night but things don't have to be weird between us. We can go back to how we were—"
"No. We can't," Kelly cuts him off. "Let's get one thing straight. My career is the most important thing to me right now. It comes before everything including you. My mom is right. I don't need you distracting me so I think we should just…keep our distance from now on. Let's not make things worse by talking about it, okay? Just leave me alone."
"So we just aren't friends anymore?"
Halfway to the door, Kelly gives him her best bitch smile from over her shoulder. "Aww, Russo, fuck buddies and friends are two drastically different things."
Watching her leave, Nicky just stands there. Stunned. He remains in that storage room for the rest of his lunch break, trying to figure out what happened. The only conclusion he can draw is that Kelly finally chose and it wasn't him.
Fine. She wants distance? He'll give her distance. Once the shock wears off, Nicky buries the pain and covers it with indifference and a cold stare. He goes straight to the office and files a transfer to the Rocky Mountain Gymnastics Training Center.
…
2010
Around this time last year, Kelly was National Champion and she had Nicky and her mom was proud of her. Now Kelly Parker isn't National Champion, she doesn't have Nicky and her mom is harder on her than ever before. Kelly's life is hell. A silent, cold hell.
One morning when Kelly is eating breakfast a magazine is slammed down in front of her. At least it didn't hit her in the face this time. How considerate of Sheila. Kelly looks up to see her mom giving her one of those I told you so looks and Kelly looks back down. Her heart sinks.
Kaylicky.
Freaking National Champion Kaylie Cruz kissing Nicky right there on the front page.
"Sweetheart, you should be thanking me for bringing you to your senses and getting away from that one. He's just like the rest of them," Sheila says, "It looks like he only has a taste for winning desserts."
Immediately losing her appetite, Kelly takes the stupid magazine along with her half-eaten breakfast and shoves it into the trash where it belongs.
…
Nicky is convinced no one, absolutely no one can fuck up like he has, especially when it comes to girls.
After everything that happened with Kelly, he told himself no more. He wasn't going to get involved and that worked for him for a while. He even picked up the nickname the Android in Boulder, kept to himself and trained hard. But then there was sweet, kind Payson Keeler, quite literally the perfect gymnast. She was the polar opposite of Kelly Parker, reversed initials, hair color and all. Boulder was his new start so why can't Payson be too? Then there was the cortisone thing and don't forget the Kaylie Cruz thing and…yeah, Nicky fucked up.
It's Valentines Day and after watching Kaylie drive away visits Denver Elite. He's met with crushing disappointment when there's only one car in the lot and Kelly Fucking Parker wouldn't drive a piece of crap like that. Nicky is drowning in frustration and needs to get out for air.
Well, what did he expect? That after striking out with Payson and then Kaylie all in one day that he could run to Kelly and she'd welcome him with open arms? Like hell Kelly Parker would let that fly.
"You need something, kid?"
Shit. Marty Walsh. Nicky would know him anywhere. He's a legend in the gymnastics world and took over Denver Elite after leaving the Rock. He also happens to be Kelly's coach.
"No, sir," Nicky responds. "I…um...I just..."
"Hey." Marty walks closer and he's a pretty tall, bulky dude even if he hasn't done any actual gymnastics in years. "Haven't I seen you around before?"
"Maybe? I'm, um, Nicky Russo."
"More like Stutters," Marty jokes. He steps closer and already Nicky can smell the liquor on him. "Nicky Russo. Nationals silver medalist. Rock affiliated. Saw you at Nationals. I was impressed. It's a shame Tucker edged you out in the end. Now, whatcha doing here so late?"
"I used to train here," Nicky explains. "I don't know. I guess you can say I was feeling nostalgic. Forget it. I'll just..."
"Want in?" Marty holds up a set of keys.
"I don't want to keep you from your whatever," Nicky says. "After all it is—"
"Just another day in February," Marty says firmly.
Nicky nods. "Right."
They walk inside and Nicky looks around. The décor has definitely changed since he was training at DE. For one, there's like a freaking Kelly Parker shrine complete with a cardboard cutout by the entrance. "Wow, I don't remember it being quite as...gimmicky?"
"Gimmicky? Sometimes I walk in here and think I'm at a Kelly Parker tourist trap," Marty says, "but as long as Kelly stays on top of her game then I manage to block out all the rest of the crap she pulls."
Nicky looks up at wall hanging with Kelly's name across it in and a list of her titles and the dates won. "I don't really see Kelly being into life-size replicas and banners. It has Sheila written all over it though."
"So you know the Momager?"
"She hates me." Nicky laughs and Marty prompts him to go on. "My dad and Kelly's dad, Sheila's ex-husband, are old friends. Therefore it's hate by association."
And the fact that she walked in on me about to have sex with her daughter, Nicky's head adds. He figures it's best to keep that to himself.
Marty smirks. "Well then, you can't be all bad."
Walking around, Nicky says, "You know, I trained here for years and Bart never gave me a second look. Then I medal at Nationals and every time the house phone rings it's new recruiters trying to talk to me about training with them."
"Hmm. You don't say. Has DE been courting you?"
"Among others. Yes." Nicky sighs. "Then I have one bad day that turns into a bad night and I made one split-second decision and…I said I was going to come back to Denver. Like I can't escape this place and I don't know why."
"Ever thought that maybe this is where you belong?"
Nicky can't bring himself to believe that Marty isn't trying to play some sort of angle. Distrusting, Nicky says, "Right. And now is the part where you pull out a Denver Elite cap and pamphlets that I can take home free and wink at me a lot?"
"Ha. No. I don't wink," Marty says seriously. "I'm not recruiting. We're just having a conversation. You obviously came here looking for answers. I'm just trying to help you find 'em." Nicky doesn't look too convinced and Marty walks towards him. "So tell me, what's it like training with the Great Sasha Belov at the Great Rock?"
Nicky shrugs. "I don't. He's got the girls to focus on. I usually just do my own thing…"
"And you think if you did get that one-on-one time you would have beat Tucker at Nationals?"
Nicky grits his teeth. He can't say the thought has never crossed his mind. "Who knows?"
"I know," Marty says boldly. "If you're willing to put in the work, show up here on time every morning and not leave until we're done, I guarantee you I can take you to the Olympics. Kid, if you can rank that high doing your own thing you'll be unstoppable with DE. Raw talent doesn't deserve to be sidelined, but disciplined. Plus, you already said you'd come. I'm just reassuring you your gut chose right."
His words slur twice during his little speech, but Nicky likes him anyways.
"Are you sure you don't already have enough on your plate with Kelly Parker?"
Marty laughs. "Kelly does have issues with sharing, but don't worry. As long as you keep your head down and don't try to put up a banner over hers then everything will be fine."
Nicky doesn't quite believe that, but agrees anyways. It looks like he really is going home.
…
When Kelly sees Nicky just coming out of the men's locker room on his first day she is pissed.
Instead of approaching him, Kelly stomps all the way to Marty's office. Once inside she slams the door behind her. Marty calmly looks up, mid-sip of his morning coffee. Kelly is fuming, however, nice enough to let Marty get some coffee into his system before she goes off.
"Good morning, Parker."
"What the hell is that piece of Rock trash doing here?" Kelly asks angrily. "Marty!"
"One, way too early in the morning for you to be taking that tone with your coach. Two, I like him. I think he's just what the men's team needs. Now, I know you're the little star around here and I doubt he's going to change that. Nicky is a low-key—"
"I want him out," Kelly says firmly. "Either he goes or I do."
Marty groans. "Ultimatums at seven in the morning? There's something in your contract against that." She gives him a harsh looks so he knows she doesn't think this is cute or funny. Groaning again, Marty rubs his hand over his aged, tired face. "Okay, Parker, sit. Talk to me."
Kelly doesn't move from her spot and simply folds her arms over her chest. "If you must know we have a history," her eye twitches, "and no I won't go into detail. Just say you'll toss him out and I'll let you get back to your coffee. If not, Marty, I'll bring my talent elsewhere."
Marty irritably grunts, knowing she's bluffing. "Gee, Kelly, a high-profile superstar gymnast like you? Changing gyms? There's the stress of finding somewhere else better suited for you and coaches up to your standards and then actually moving. Also this is obviously going to set off red flags with the NGO as if they aren't already doubting you, but you're free to go if—"
"Stop." Kelly slams her hand down against his desk. "Are you seriously trying to Kelly Parker Kelly Parker?"
"Did you seriously just use your name as a verb?" Marty gives her a smartass smile and sips his coffee. He shakes his head. "Cut the diva act, Kelly. Stop the dramatics and start training."
"Fine. Some help you are," Kelly scowls. "If you won't make him go then I will."
In retrospect, it probably wasn't the smartest move telling the guy in charge of disciplinary action at DE that she's going to make one of his gymnast's life hell, but whatever. And so Kelly gets all the Denver boys to haze Nicky hard. They intimidate him and harass him especially when he's trying to train and mess with his car and break into his locker and steal his clothes more than once. This goes on for months, but Nicky just ignores it and goes on with his life. The guys lose interest and it drives Kelly crazy that she can't break him.
"So what's going on between you and Russo?"
Carter Anderson. He showed up a few months after Nicky did. Seriously, is there some fucking sign out front that says: 'deposit unwanted Rock losers here'? Ridiculous.
Kelly looks Carter up and down, done with playing flirty to get information out of him. "How many times do I have to tell you that you aren't allowed to speak to me without first being spoken to? And what kind of question is that?"
"Oh, it's nothing." He plays nonchalant and Kelly finds it incredibly annoying. "Just know that I've been there. The way you're looking at Nicky, Lauren spent years looking at me like that and I spend a lot of time looking at Kaylie like that so if you need someone to talk to—"
Kelly laughs. She actually laughs. "You get what you just said to me, right? And how stupid it sounded? You and I aren't friends and there's nothing going on with Russo and me so I'd advise you to stop talking now."
He frowns. "I told you everything about Lauren and me and even Kaylie and me…"
"Voluntarily," Kelly says with a big smile. "Now, I have training to do and, Car-Car, it would be in your best interest to keep your observations to yourself from now on."
A little dejected (what was he expecting? A comfort fuck?) Carter walks away.
"Lover's quarrel?" Nicky's lazy voice asks from behind her. Kelly doesn't say anything. She hasn't talked to him once since he's gotten here. "Carter Anderson, Kelly, really? Kaylie dated him. Lauren dated him. Now apparently you…"
"Actually, I'm not dating him so if you want a go at him no one is stopping you," Kelly says. "The conversation is sucks, but the sex is fantastic. Just so you know, he likes to be dominated."
Nicky looks at her with his stupid sad puppy eyes. "I'm just worried. That's all."
"Well, don't. He's so bitter about Lauren. He doesn't even think of Kaylie anymore," Kelly says dismissively. Nicky looks confused and Kelly sighs. "There's no point trying to deny it. The world apparently knows. You are dating her, aren't you? Kaylicky?"
His face goes from confused to understanding and them embarrassment. "Oh. That. It wasn't even anything. Just the media seeing an opportunity and running with it," Nicky explains. "When I said I was worried I…I meant I was worried about you."
He's being sweet and Kelly doesn't trust it. "Why are you even here?"
"Eat lunch with me and I'll tell you," he proposes. The hope in his voice and in his expression makes her feel something strange, a low sort of ache, and it's scary. How he makes her feel in a way no one else ever could.
"On second thought I don't care that much. Or at all, really."
The disappointment he wears makes Kelly hate herself. "Parks, I'm trying here…"
"Well, don't," she turns her back on him, "You're wasting your time, Russo." She calls him that because she can't bear to hear herself call him Nick. "Face it. No one wants you here. Least of all me."
In truth, all Kelly wants is to pull him close and let him back in, but she knows she has no choice but to push him away.
…
Nicky forgot how easily she pisses him off and how long he can stays angry afterwards.
Later that day, when everyone has either gone home or is getting ready to, Kelly is still on beam. Nicky watches from afar, in awe, even if he wouldn't ever admit it. Not once does Kelly give off any indication that she's aware she's on a four-inch-wide beam. Her sense of gravity and her ability to maneuver the apparatus is kind of amazing. Nicky walks over just as she does a front aerial without even fumbling.
"Impressive."
Her face turns sour just at the sound of his voice. "Hush, Russo. I'm working."
"Impressive, but it's not enough if you want to beat Kaylie," Nicky murmurs. He watches the florescent lighting play off her face and suddenly she looks so tense.
"Shut up. You don't even know what you're talking about."
"Kaylie isn't the National Champion for nothing. She didn't beat you out for nothing. You really think you can compete with that?" Nicky asks, knowingly pressing buttons. "The Worlds team tryouts are coming up. There's even buzz about Payson making some unbelievable comeback. A lot more competition than you thought, huh? Defending a title is one thing. Fighting to stay relevant is another and that's exactly what you're doing."
When she looks to be ignoring him, Nicky steps back and just watches. After a moment spent regaining her concentration, Kelly goes into a front tuck, but she lands wrong on her feet and ends up jumping off the beam, wincing. Nicky thinks she's faking it, but when she tries to put pressure on her foot and nearly starts crying, he runs right over.
"Kelly, what happened?"
"It's my ankle," Kelly says through gritting teeth. Wobbling a bit, she grabs onto Nicky's shoulder to regain her balance. "Hurts like a bitch."
"We need help over here! Someone get some ice and call Marty!" Nicky shouts frantically. He sees one of the other guys nod and take off towards the office. Turning back to Kelly, Nicky frowns. "Kel, I didn't—"
"I hope you're happy!" With a loud, pained hiss, Kelly shoves him away from her, trying to stand on one foot. When she nearly topples over, Nicky ignores her hostility and steadiest her by the arm. As he's helping her over to the side, in a much quieter voice, Kelly murmurs, "You got into my head."
Clearly guilty, Nicky sighs. "I wasn't trying to…okay, I was, but I didn't mean for you to get hurt."
"Apparently that happens a lot with you," she says snidely. Nicky gets her over to a bench and then finds a high stool for her to rest her ankle on. When Nicky sits beside her, Kelly balls her hand into a fist and hits him as hard as she can. "You're such a fucking prick! If you didn't try to come back then none of this would have ever happened! You ruin everything! And I always end up suffering the consequences!"
Kelly punches him again, but, fuck, he's all muscle so it probably hurt her hand more than she hurt him. Still, at this point, Kelly doesn't care anymore because the tears are streaming down her cheeks and she's clenching her jaw because everything fucking hurts. Nicky just sits there, a little scared and a lot guilty, as she beats the shit out of his arm.
"Kelly…"
"Don't talk to me!"
"Kelly, stop," Nicky whispers. He places his hands on her arms, trying to get her to stop thrashing as she cries and doesn't even care that he's watching. "This isn't just about your ankle, is it?"
She stops then, catching herself and how she let the mask slip and shatter into a million pieces right in front of him. Trying to regain her composure, Kelly roughly pulls away from him and responds, "Don't be an idiot. This is about how I can't even friggin' walk and that's it."
"Lie," he calls like they're playing bullshit, which they kind of have been for a long time.
Sick of being so close to him, sick of his soothing voice and his perfect face and pleading eyes, Kelly can't take it anymore. "I want you gone," she straight-out demands. "As in pack your shit and get the hell out of my gym. I don't want to see you ever again."
Nicky swallows hard. "Fair enough. First, tell me what I did wrong."
Kelly is furious. "Isn't it obvious? You don't know how to mind your own business and just had to come over and distracted me while I was on beam and I messed up my ankle again!"
"No," Nicky says calmly. "Last time."
She opens her mouth to go on yelling at him, but then stops. She stops herself because that isn't a place she wants to go. Not ever. "Just let it go."
"Just explain to me what the hell happened last time and I'll go straight to Marty and tell him thanks, but I'm leaving," he says. The tension is so thick right now, pressing down on both of them. Kelly starts to feel lightheaded. "I'll disappear for good this time. I promise."
And before Kelly can actually think about what she's doing, she blurts it out, "I got pregnant."
The next few moments are spent in silence. Kelly can't take the way he's looking at her and so she wipes away the tears with the back of her hand and turns her attention to her ankle. It's already starting to swell, but she can bend it a bit despite the pain. Here's for hoping it's an old injury awakened and not broken. She glances back at Nicky and he's still staring dumbly.
"That's not funny."
Kelly laughs miserably. "Does it look like I'm trying to be funny right now?"
Nicky drives his fingers through his dark hair and his shoulders slump forward. "Kel, why didn't you tell me?"
"Because nothing you could have said or done would have changed my mind," she says. It comes so easy because she's practice this in her head so many times. "I would have still gotten it taken care of, kept my spot on the National team and went on to Worlds. Telling you would have just complicated things. Unnecessary stress."
"Unnecessary stress?" Nicky angrily repeats. He stops himself, though, and looks away for a second. Gently, he says, "I wouldn't have tried to change your mind, but I would have been there. I would have made sure you didn't have to go through that alone."
"I wasn't alone," Kelly assures him. "I had my mom."
With a humorless laugh, Nicky says, "Like I said, I wouldn't have let you go through that alone."
He looks at her and it almost feels like old times. Kelly hates that she feels this and that her heart flutters a bit at the familiarity and the possibility. Too much time has gone by and everything has changed. He shouldn't be making her feel like this anymore. He shouldn't be scooping up her hand with his and holding it tight, but he is.
"Jesus Christ, Kelly Parker! An injury? This close to the Worlds team tryouts?" Marty shouts, totally ruining their moment. Kelly tugs her hand away from his and Nicky clears his throat. "What the hell happened?"
"I lost focus," Kelly pipes in before Nicky can say a word. "It was my bad."
"No kidding," Marty grunts. "Okay. Up. Let's get this x-rayed."
Marty helps her up and Kelly winces, shooting Nicky a sideward glance. "Remember your promise, Russo."
And he does. He starts looking for a new gym the second he gets home that night.
…
Sheila isn't happy about the ankle or Kelly having to go to rehab, but what else is new?
Kelly hates this. She hates her lack of mobility. She hates having to deal with her mother. She hates that Nicky is the reason she blew out her ankle and that she cried in front of him and that he knows now. She doesn't regret telling him, but she doesn't know what to think of it either. For a long time, a little part of her was convinced that if Nicky came back then everything would be okay again. Now she knows that isn't true.
Situated on the couch, Kelly watches her fourth consecutive episode of The Real World (because what else is a incapacitated friendless elite gymnast supposed to do and shit does MTV marathon it a lot) when the doorbell rings. She wants to ignore it, not in the mood to deal with people, but then again, it's probably a good idea to get up every four hours or so. Motion is a big part of the healing process after all.
It takes her some time to finally make her way to the front door especially with the stupid crutches and the even stupider cast-brace, but she eventually gets there. Kelly pulls the door open and there's Nicky standing with his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.
"What are you doing here?"
Nicky smiles shyly. "Did you think I was just going to leave without saying anything?"
"You've done it before," Kelly says. He looks instantly uncomfortable and Kelly almost feels bad so she sighs and moves aside, motioning for him to come in. "Relax. Mom's not home, but it's probably best if you keep your clothes on this time."
Ignoring that last bit, Nicky walks inside and says, "Yeah, I saw your mom leave. Then I parked my car two blocks over and walked here."
"Paranoid much?"
"Cautious," he corrects. "Cautious is always better than carless."
"So I've learned."
They sit together on the couch together and Nicky has never been a TV person so it doesn't surprise Kelly when he tries to talk to her. "So listen…I'm leaving tomorrow and…there are things I need to say to you before I go. The last time, the way I just up and left without talking to you wasn't cool. You can put," he glances at the TV, "people senselessly cursing each other out on pause for like two seconds, right?"
With the click of a button, Kelly turns off the flatscreen. She won't face him, but that's just something Nicky is going to have to live with.
"To be honest," Nicky takes a breath, "I was so mad at you for so long after the last time we talked in the storage room. It really sucked because I thought…and I know if it weren't for that brace, you'd kick my ass for how lame this sounds, but I really thought we had something great and I hated that you were willing to just throw it all away…but I didn't get it then."
"And you have it all figured out now?"
"Feel free to jump in any time," Nicky says. "You were protecting me, weren't you? That day in the storage room you said your mom could have done worse and we were both lucky she didn't. Then I start wondering how. Your mom, big shot manager with her big shot clients, she has all the right connections and if I got on her bad side, which I obviously did, no one would want to represent me."
Kelly nods ever so slightly. "Gymnastics politics. PR is half the battle."
"So what did she say? That she'd blacklist and bury me if we didn't stop hanging out?"
"No," Kelly says. "She was damn certain she was going to blacklist and bury you no matter what. I had to convince her not to. I had to promise her to run you out of DE myself and if I did, if I proved how committed I was to my dream then she'd leave you alone."
"You didn't have to…"
"It was the right thing to do. If I didn't and she put a target on your head, even medaling at Nationals wouldn't have been enough," Kelly says. "I'd say we all did pretty well. Not as well as I would have liked, but I accomplished my goal. You got a taste of the glory, parties in Hollywood, magazine spreads and kissing girls for the camera."
Looking embarrassed, Nicky looks across the room. "Okay, for the record, Kaylie kissed me on the cheek and it was just to piss me off. Still, I think I'll leave all that to Austin Tucker for now on. Not my thing. It would be nice to be known for my actual gymnastics and not, well, how great my name is when combined with another top gymnast's."
"Aww, Nick, being called Kaylicky isn't something to brag about. Seriously." They share a smile and when Kelly catches herself she rolls her eyes.
"Still," Nicky says softly. "Thank you."
"Whatever. And quit looking at me like that."
"What?" Nicky grins. "You used to smile every time I looked at you like this."
When she feels the corners of her lips turning up, Kelly turns away and nudges him with her shoulder. He takes her hand and it's insane how something so simple can feel so intimate.
"Do you want to talk about…about…you know…?"
Kelly shakes her head. No. "It was a long time ago and it's done and I just want to move on."
Nicky nods. "Okay. That's cool."
He doesn't push for details and just squeezes her hand. It reminds Kelly of how they got so close in the first place. She could always count on him to be there even when she was being the biggest bitch on the planet. Nicky was there without question and without judgment.
"You know, I've been thinking about it and I was in a shitload of pain at the time so I was most likely overreacting. If you stay I'm sure we can learn to coexist at DE and Marty will finally stop pouting."
"Tempting," Nicky says, "but I've already got everything set up in Dallas and I need to follow through. Plus, Denver Elite and me," he winces, "It's like a bull in a China shop every time."
"And with me out, it looks like DE is resting on Carter's shoulders," Kelly says.
Nicky laughs. "It looks like Marty is going to be spending more time at that bar he likes."
"It's a strip club, actually," Kelly points out.
"Right. Thanks. Because I really needed that mental image in my head," Nicky says sorely. "Hey Parks, l, um, I really am sorry about your ankle."
"Whatever. Like something as minor as a sprain is going to keep me out for long. I'm going to do rehab in Houston and by the time the Exhibition comes around I'll be ready, go in, kick ass and the NGO is going to be begging me to be on the Worlds team. It's foolproof."
"Houston huh?"
"Don't." She hits him playfully and Nicky's face contorts in pain. Kelly raises an eyebrow and Nicky pulls up the sleeve of his t-shirt to show her bruise on his shoulder. When she sees it, Kelly laughs. "Holy crap. I kicked your ass."
"Only because I let you," Nicky says. "So is the Momager going to be in Texas with us?"
She gives him a warning look when she hears the 'us' but decides to let it slide. "No, she won't be and you and Marty need to quit calling her that." Kelly pokes his bruise and Nicky suppresses a whimper. "If you must know, mother has other clients to tend to. Plus, she hates humidity. I know it probably sounds horrible, but I'm actually excited. A break from her and DE and everything sounds really nice right about now."
"Good," Nicky nods. "So since we're going to be relatively close and equally alone, one of the days you aren't busy and I'm not busy we should hook-up." Nicky cringes. "I mean…I didn't mean…not like hook-up, but you know…eat…together…?"
God. He's such a spaz. And that's what makes her smile.
"Maybe," Kelly says casual. "Text me and we'll see."
"Great." Looking triumphant, Nicky grins. Then suddenly his expression softens and he reaches out to touch her cheek. Kelly sucks in a deep breath. Nicky starts to lean in and Kelly almost shoves him away, but she's glad she didn't when he kisses her cheek.
…
Kelly doesn't know why she stalls when it comes to showing her mom Kaylie Cruz's journal. She should be presenting it to Sheila on a silver platter, praying for any bit of affection, but instead the journal is buried at the bottom of her gym bag.
From her little field trip, Kelly has learned that Kaylie Cruz is soft. It doesn't make much sense how she's gotten this far in the gymnastics world (besides luck and money), but it does make perfect sense why she developed an eating disorder. Some people can't handle the pressure. Some aren't tough enough. Kelly had her mom to train her, to mold her into a cutthroat bitch to fend off other cutthroat bitches. After having dinner with Ronnie Cruz, all the woman ever did to prepare Kaylie for life is give her a credit card and advise her to go for glitz and pink.
Sliding her finger over the leathery cover of Kaylie Cruz's journal, Kelly cradles her phone to her ear. "…and then she invited me to stay for dinner just like that. Imagine it, Nick, me sitting there, eating dinner with your ex-girlfriend and Marty's ex-mistress. Boy was that a blast."
Nicky laughs from the other end of the line. "Your sarcasm doesn't fool me, Parker. You and I both know you enjoyed it."
"I don't know," Kelly sighs, "It was kind of like a trip to the zoo to see the animals except these animals were well-dressed, lived in a fairly impressive house and do love to put on a bright-eyed and bushy-tailed show."
"And you've always liked the zoo."
"Not the point."
"And your point is?"
"During our little heart-to-heart, Kaylie might of said something and…I started thinking," Kelly says. "That time in the storage room you asked if we were still friends…"
"And you straight out told me we were more in the fuck buddy category," Nicky says. "I remember. You really hurt my feelings."
"Shut up. I'm trying to be serious here," Kelly says impatiently. "We were…friends. At least, to me we were. And I never told you when we were talking on my couch, but…what we had was pretty great. Honestly, I don't know if I would have won Nationals without you being there for me…and yeah, if it wasn't for the brace I would have kicked your ass for being so cheesy."
Nicky chuckles. "If that's your way of saying thank you then you're welcome."
"And one more thing," Kelly says, "We were really friends and really happy, weren't we?"
"Yeah," he answers like it's the easiest thing in the world. "We still are, Parks."
"Um, no we aren't," Kelly says playfully. "Mom says I don't have time for friends, remember?"
"Shh. She's probably listening to our conversation right now," Nicky says playfully, lowering his voice. "I wouldn't doubt the Momager resorting to wiretapping."
Kelly rolls her eyes. She's certain Nicky and Marty falling in sensei-grasshopper love was the worst thing ever.
"So," Kelly goes on, "if we're friends that means you'd back me up no matter what, right? Even if I do something that…that looks horrible, sounds horrible and makes me feel actual guilt without you even having to lecture me about it…I'd still have you, right?"
"Always," Nicky says without hesitation. "You're okay, right? We haven't talk since we, uh…hooked-up in Houston and now out of the blue you call me to tell me about your random dinner date with the Cruzes? Kind of freaking me out. What's going on?"
She debates telling him everything about how her mom is worse than ever before and how she knows it's all kinds of sick and twisted, but she just has to do this and keep her mom happy. She even thinks about telling Nicky about the journal. Instead, Kelly just takes a shaky breath and says, "I just…I miss my friend, Nick."
A pause and he responds, "Yeah, I miss you too."
Kelly stares down at her empty hand and she imagines that if Nicky were here with her he'd be holding it. It is so hard to ignore how much she wants to be near him. What she would give to feel his hands on her, to see his smile and look into his eyes and touch him back. Pushing away thoughts of what she can't have, Kelly takes in what she can. The sound of his voice and his raspy laugh, the dorky things he says and the cute way he nervously stutters.
They talk about what's new and even dip into what's old. They talk late into the night and early in the morning. Nicky laughs sleepily when he says he knows she's falling asleep and Kelly whines when she tells him not to hang up. Eventually, they both fall asleep and in the morning Kelly groggily wakes up to the buzz of Nicky's alarm clock.
After rubbing the sleep from her eyes, Kelly realizes they were on the phone all night. She can't exactly place the feeling she gets when she thinks about this or what it means. Not right now at least. Instead, Kelly just closes her eyes and lies back down, close to her phone.
When she hears Nicky groan like the big baby he can be in the morning and then murmur a raspy, "good morning, Parks," Kelly jolts awake because she knows what this feeling is. It's the first time she's felt loved in a long time.
A/N: Gah. I have such an unhealthy amount of love for this couple that isn't even a couple and the Momager is so fun to write. Now, make my day and review!
Xoxo