Oh wow!

Six years!

Want an update? Anyone listening?

Writing these fics was basically my main after school activity in high school. At the same time I was doing a lot of short story contestsl and wrote competitive essays through the school board. Hehehe, huge nerd. Around the time that I stopped updating I'd graduated high school and fell deep into the Avengers fandom, then the Teen Wolf fandom. I wrote a LOT of Teen Wolf fanfiction as Tumblr prompts and had a moderately popular AO3 for my fic. If you're into Sterek you might have read some of it. (Lol this was all probably like 4-5 years ago, it's so fun to remember. I had a great time writing fic).

I made it to second year for English before I began going through a serious depression. I had a drinking problem (something that came out in some of my later fic weirdly enough) and didn't go to class a lot, got really down on myself and dropped out. Then for two years I just lived like a hermit getting high af all the time and never leaving my room, never writing or really feeling like myself. It SUCKED. Like a lot. I'd been depressed a bit in high school and I would usually just daydream it away or write tomes of fiction in my room, but this time I was a grown up, all I would write about was myself and how shitty I felt.

Then I went on a workaway job, got all buff n sexi, and I felt A+.

Now I'm back in school for writing. A lot of it involves themes I went into a lot in my fanfiction days. Feeling weird, feeling alone. Not thinking you fit in anywhere and hoping to Christ that in your weirdness someone somewhere will be able to understand you.

In Sandwich Boy Alec is basically me. Reading it all these years later as an adult it's like "Jesus, Dr. Blind, you were so cute and sweet and you thought so little of yourself. Where was your Magnus to tell you everything was okay?"

Spoiler, he was inside me all along!

This turned so motivational lol. Basically what I'm trying to say is that even though I don't update, even though I haven't had the creative juice for this type of thing in a while, I still love that you guys read and enjoy it. And through all these years yes, I've been reading your messages. They come to my email I use for everything. I started reading fic in 2007 when I was just a tater tot and it ended up shaping my major in university. So that's pretty cool!

That said, when I wrote some of my fic it was a different fuckin time bud, and looking back there were som things going on in my imagination. I've decided to take down some stories that have elements of rape, non-consensual sex, coercion and exploitation of sex workers in them. These stories were written when I was 16 and there was a big trend in 'dubcon' etc in erotic fanfiction. What should have been a safe foray into the erotic in some of my stories instead displayed an unhealthy relationship to sexuality that I identified with as a victim of sexual abuse. And even if you're not happy with the deletion of these stories, it's my right to see that this type of content is not on my account.

Also, that said, I may not be a Fanfiction author anymore, and my account may not be active, but please do not post my content to other websites under your own name. You have to credit me. My teenage self did not pour hours into her keyboard for someone else to claim credit. These are not your words, you do not get to post them without linking to my account.

If you link to my account, I don't care. I still like getting messages that let me know someone out there is enjoying something I've written. It's like having a past self resurface for a moment and that is a cool feeling. Kind of like hearing a song you were super into as a kid.

Anyway, thanks for reading guys!

Love,
Dr. Blind/MasqueofRedDeath (on AO3)