Hello! Random idea I had the other day and wrote it during the very early hours of this morning. I thought that I hadn't even seen any fics about when Burt went to the free clinic... so ta-da! But there's more than talks of sex. I wanted something deeper. I live a Burt Hummel appreciation life, alright. So this is Burt-centric.

I hope you enjoy, reviews always make me happy by the way ;) thank you for all of you who always leave me such nice stuff on my fics!

Also huge thanks to the 100 people who have story alerted Glass Bones & Paper Skin. I never expected anyone to ever read what I write so thank you to everyone!

But maybe you could step outside of your comfort zone and educate yourself...

Well, he was certainly outside of his comfort zone to say the least.

Although the warm spring sun gently warmed his cheeks and the back of his neck, Burt Hummel shivered as he gripped the handle of the door roughly in his right hand. He wanted nothing more than to turn back and pretend that he hadn't even been here, hadn't plucked up the courage to pull into the car park after driving around the block a couple of times. The radio buzzed lowly at him like a swarm of angry bees as his fingers sat clenched around the steering wheel with a single muscle throbbing in the back of his hand. This was going to be hell, painful even. But Burt wanted nothing more than to be a good father to his son.

He had tried. He really had. Ever since Kurt was born, ever since he held his tiny, fragile frame in his palms, Burt promised that he'd be an amazing father. He dreamed of taking Kurt to football games, grabbing half time snacks before dashing across the street to stuff their faces with messy burgers at the diner. Burt dreamed of everything, thought of every possible scenario of Kurt's life that he would be a part of. He treasured these thoughts. From the football games to teaching him how to ride a bike to helping him with homework after school... heck, even to giving him 'The (painfully awkward) Talk'.

But as Kurt grew older, Burt slowly realised that he would never be doing the things that he pictured him doing with his little boy. Instead of football games, Kurt liked the theatre. Instead of watching basketball on the TV, he would rather give small private performances to his mom in the living room, shimmying to Broadway classic after Broadway classic. And when Kurt asked for a pair of heels for Christmas one year, Burt just knew. And that may have been when the distance begun to grow. Burt Hummel fucking loved his son. He would watch him giggling and laughing on the swing in the back garden for hours and hours, kicking his little legs and smiling up at the sky. Burt was always scared that he would fall and hurt himself one day. But he would be able to cope with that, be able to cope with patching up little grazes with bandages and kisses but knew that one day, Kurt would be facing worse things that bumped elbows and scratched up knees. He loved his son so much that it sometimes hurt to breathe as his chest swelled proudly whenever Burt watched him. That is my son right there... my son. I will always protect him and do anything for him. But regardless, this gap grew between father and son because Burt just couldn't connectwith him. He taught Kurt how to ride a bike, sat through tea parties... even sat through those little performances in the living room, clutching a hand drawn programme in bright crayon with a beaming illustrated Kurt on the cover. It just saddened him that, regardless of everything he had promised himself, Kurt and himself never truly bonded.

Then, after Kurt's mother's death, things declined further. Burt shut off, spent too many hours doing overtime at the garage and just left Kurt with a babysitter. Looking back, he felt nothing but guilt over how he had treated his son. He was mourning the loss of his wife... but Kurt had lost a mother. Kurt stopped telling him how his day went, the communication was lost and everything just slowly fell down around their ankles. After waking up at 3am one morning and thinking shit... I've been treating my poor son so badly...and then Burt definitely promised that things would get better from then on.

They still had disagreements throughout Kurt's teen years and things were hard, just like they were with any teenager. Things only got better, (surprisingly, as strangers on the outside has said), when Kurt finally came out as gay to his father. A weight had been lifted, in Burt's opinion, as he knew that, when they reached that point and when Kurt had found the strength and trust to tell him, then that meant that he and his son truly had something. Truly, trulyhad something. They finally picked up where they left off when Kurt was small and, although Burt never did make it to those football games and the sloppy meals at the diner, he wouldn't swap it for the world.

One of his and his son's disagreements, though, was the sole reason as to why Burt stood outside the free clinic in Lima. Well, actually, no. It wasn't the sole reason. The comment about stepping outside his comfort zone and educating himself from Kurt stuck inside his mind, replaying every single day. It was the attached 'so if I have any questions, I could go to my dad like any... straight son could' which really dug in, latching on to his mind and not letting him forget. He was right. Kurt was so damn right and Burt was afraid to admit it. He hated stepping into foreign territory, hated running risks or doing something that he just wasn't used to doing. Burt had lived in Lima for his whole life, only ever living in two houses, running the place that was once his father's own when he was old enough. Burt hated change. But he really wanted to help Kurt by stepping outside of that zone that he had settled into over the period of his life, by educating himself and finally being the sort of father that his son could confide in. However, he never had the courage.

But then that... that Blaine kid arrived at the garage one day, hands dug tightly in his pockets as he fidgeted nervously, words such as 'sex', 'protection' and 'STDs' rolling off of his tongue. Burt tried to keep his attention fixed to the car he was working on, his head low over the engine but the way that Blaine had pretty much told him that his dad wasn't as accepting towards his sexuality as Burt was towards Kurt... that struck him. I think it would be really cool if you took advantage of that... Blaine was right. Burt now had a really reallygood relationship with his son... why wasn't he making the most out of it?

Burt stood reading the posters stuck to the glass of the door as he slowly built up the courage to enter the building. Unplanned pregnancy... pop in for advice on what to do for unintentional pregnancies... well, at least Kurt won't be getting girls pregnant any time soon...he though with a slightly chortle to himself. But Burt fell back away from the door in surprise as a face appeared on the other side of the glass, soft and smiling in a motherly way. The lady opened the door to poke her head outside, beckoning Burt back over welcomingly.

"I'd been watching you for the past half hour outside that door," the lady, who had introduced herself as Sarah, chuckled, pushing a cup of coffee across the table as they sat seated in their office. "It can be hard for some people to find the courage to come in but we love to help. So... how can I do so?"

The smile upon Sarah's face was so warming that Burt just instantly felt the want and desire to open up to her. This was her job after all, to help others in their time of need, and the way she made him want to spill all... well, she was certainly good at her job.

"I need... I need a hand giving my son the talk about- about sex." Burt finally managed to splutter out, his cheeks reddening slightly. He didn't want Sarah to think that he was incapable as a parent but hey, he was already here, no turning back. Burt was used to being judged and being stared at by others. That's the man who raised his son to be a fag... people would mutter in the street. Oh how he hated the idiocy of Lima.
"Ahhhh," the smile never slipped from her face as she turned towards the pamphlets lined up on the shelf behind her, reaching towards a leaflet with an illustration of a boy and a girl on the front. "It's okay we have many parents-"

"No, no. My son's gay."

Sarah's hand froze, her outstretched fingers centimetres from the leaflets. Burt waited for the awkward smile, an uneasy silence, maybe even expected her to send him out of her office. He thought Sarah was nice but a lot of the time, first impressions didn't matter. Because whenever the word 'gay' was mentioned in stupid Lima, even the nicest of people's insides turned ugly with homophobia. But she merely moved to the drawer below and pulled out a stack of pamphlets, before twisting back to face Burt.

"Well, perhaps we don't have many parents who come to me about that. I haven't gotten these leaflets out in a long time!" Burt still sat tensely as she spoke, waiting for the tell-tale homophobic signs that he had grown to recognise. But not once did Sarah's smile slip as she flicked through the papers. "It must be hard for him in such a state as Ohio."

He finally let his body relax at this, body slumping back into the seat as he felt an intense appreciation for the woman across the table. "It has been a struggle... but Kurt has always been strong, always been a fighter."

Sarah smile suddenly burst into a bright beam, shuffling forward in her seat to push the leaflets across the table to Burt. She gently explained the rather graphic diagrams inside, explaining all about lubricant and preparation and just generally how it all worked. The awkwardness slowly drained away from the conversation and Burt felt incrediblythankful towards the private prep boy that shuffled into his garage one dull, boring afternoon.

Then slowly they moved onto deeper things, past the sex and the passion to the intimacy and the emotions of love making. Burt wanted Kurt to know this, to know that sex was a lot more than fumbling hands and hurried kisses in the dark. It was so much more and Kurt deserved that. Kurt deserved love and romance andeverything. Kurt deserved the world. Not a quick romp that seemed like a good idea during the heat of the moment and the height of passion but was something he was going to regret and carry with him for the rest of his life.

"I just want... I just want Kurt to know that sex is a big thing. There's... there's something more than the physical. It means something. I don't- I don't want him to throw himself around and throw himself away... he means so much more than that. How do I tell him that?" said Burt as he fiddled with the handle of his now empty mug of coffee. He was glad that he'd come here after all because he knew that this wasn't just going to be beneficial to Kurt, but it was beneficial to him too. The meeting had opened his eyes and he could definitely see a lotclearer now.

"Just tell him," Sarah answered softly, her eyes full of care as she leaned across the table slightly, hands clasped together in front of her. "Tell him what you just told me. You don't need a 'how to' or a shove in the right direction from me, Burt. Because what you just said was amazing. You really do understand what it's all about and when you sit Kurt down in front of you, it will just come naturally to you, just how this has. You seem like a spectacular parent, Burt. I think Kurt is lucky to have you."

He fidgeted rather shyly at this, cheeks growing slightly pink again. "I just want him to know that he matters. He matters so damn much to me that sometimes it hurts. He's been through so much and he just deserves to be happy." Burt replied, slowly gathering the leaflets upon the desk, feeling that the meeting was drawing to a natural close. Although it was still going to have a hint of awkwardness towards it, Burt kind of looked forward to sitting Kurt down to talk to him in the evening... to finally act like a father should, in his opinion. To not only give him helping hand but to also just tell him that you. matter. Kurt.

As Sarah hurriedly tidied up the rest of her desk, tucking the unneeded pamphlets back into her drawer, she looked over at Burt with a twinkle in her eye. "So why the sudden need to come and talk to me about this? Has Kurt got a lucky boy in his life? If you don't mind me asking." She added with a chuckle, grinning cheekily across the desk.

Burt slowly sank back into the seat he was just rising from, the smile on his face gradually slipping as he settled back into the cushions. "No. Well, yes. Sort of. Not yet, really... there's this boy that he likes. I mean really reallylikes... but the boy is so ridiculously blind that he hasn't noticed what's in front of him yet. In fact, the boy is the reason that I came here today. He felt that Kurt's lack of knowledge was too limited on this subject... that one day it would be too late when he needed to know about things such as protection and sexual diseases... I'm really glad that Kurt has someone to look out for him like that... I guess Blaine really made me stop and think when he told me that I should be taking advantage of my great relationship I have with my son," he paused to chuckle slightly, warmth in his eyes as he spoke of the boy that his son doted on so much. "Cheeky bugger."

Burt lapsed into silence once again as he fiddled with the papers in his hands, thoughts running swiftly through his mind. Sarah just sat in mirrored silence, sensing that Burt wanted to continue and so left him time to think.

"Blaine... Blaine's messed Kurt around too much. The romantic flirting with him... but then turning around and chasing after other boys, pushing aside my son's feelings... even having a brief moment where he turned straight and dated one of Kurt's best friends... It just got a little too much for me when Kurt began coming home more than once in tears over that boy. He loves Blaine so much. Kurt is such a... such a romantic. He falls so easily and is so loving- he gets that from his mother, see. But despite all of the tears, I can't hate Blaine. I just have this... fondness towards the boy. I sometimes take one look into his eyes whenever he's around the house and just see this- this confused and lost little child behind this confident persona he is so intent at keeping up. I can just see that he is aching for a little bit of love... therefore the reason why he jumped at the first chance of relationships when he found them... running to it whenever he found the first opening. I always suspected that maybe things weren't great for him at home but when he told me that his parents weren't too accepting towards him being gay... My heart- it achedfor him. Sometimes I just want to reach out and hold him because I recognise that look that's in his eyes... it's the same look that Kurt used to have after his mom's death. A look that just screams that things aren't okay and that the world is just one big confusing place."

Burt smiled as he sat and thought about Kurt and about Blaine and how he really reallywould be okay with it if one day the other boy just opened his eyes and noticed the amazing boy before him that was Burt's own flesh and blood. Burt continued his speech steadily, partly forgetting that Sarah was even there and losing himself in his own little world.

"Sometimes I think Kurt's been too hard on him. There was a moment when Blaine just... he fell. That's the only word I can think of to describe it. Everything got confusing for him and I knew how that felt. Not knowing what's going on. One minute, the boy's as straight as a roundabout and then suddenly, after a silly drunken kiss, his world's flipped upside down and he's questioning everything he thought he was. It was hard for Kurt, watching the person he looked up to fall to pieces, but imagine how Blaine felt. Imagine how terrifying it had been for him. He doesn't know what he's doing in life, even if he acts like he does."

Slipping the pamphlets back on the desk, Burt settled back in his chair before taking his cap off and rubbing his head, before placing it back neatly, a habit which Burt had adopted whenever he was deep in thought.

"Kurt's been through a lot of shit at school. And I mean a lot of shit. He never told me the details, never let me know what really happened in those corridors when no one else was watching. One guy particularly made his life awful, something which I found out when it was far too late to repair the damage which he had done to my kid. But he was expelled when Kurt finally told me what went down in that damn school and everything got a little better for him. I know Blaine got him through a lot of that mess. Kurt never told me that but there was that connection which just told me that Blaine was there for my kid more than they let on. Then the stupid school board let that bully back in and I couldn't let Kurt stay there, I couldn't. He threatened to kill him! A kid had turned to my own and threatened his life. He wasnot staying at McKinley... I instantly thought of Blaine. Blaine looked after Kurt. Blaine would help keep him safe. I saw the picture that Kurt had of him in his locker, some sort of collage underneath it that read courage. That must mean something between them. I never asked but... I just knew I could rely on him. So we took Kurt to Dalton. Got shown around the campus by Blaine... and as I left, I shook his hand and just looked him in the eye, trying to say to him without words toplease, just look after my son, I'm relying on you. And he did. He looked after him. Kurt had problems settling in at first but then he would come home more often with a smile on the face and Blaine's name on his lips. I think that Blaine was the main reason that Kurt loved it there."

"I hide it but I like Blaine. I watch him and Kurt together and I just feel... so many emotions. I've never seen Kurt smile like that. The way he looks at that boy is just pure adoration, as if he worships the ground he walks on. Maybe it's unhealthy for him. But I'm just so glad that there's finally someone out there that he's connected with. He needs Blaine, a lot. More than Blaine realises I think. I literally watched Kurt change overnight after he moved to Dalton Academy. There was that sparkle that went missing many, many years ago. I... I missed that. And I'm so grateful that Blaine's brought it back. I'm so grateful towards that boy for everything. Heck, I weren't even that bothered when I went to wake Kurt one morning and found Blaine sleeping in his bed! They've had their ups and downs but they've fought through it and not given up. That's why I think if anything happened between them, it would work. And a part of me just wants them to get together so bad because the wait for it is like torture. Everyone can see it will happen one day. I just want them both to have the best that life can offer them and to have all the happiness in the world... because they deserve it. And I just hope that the find this happiness through each other."

At the end of his soliloquy, Burt lapsed back into a comfortable silence, which was swiftly disturbed by a prickling sensation at the back of his eyes. He rubbed at them with the back of his hands to push away what were, surprisingly, tears. Looking across the desk at the woman opposite, he smiled as he noticed that she was just as watery eyed as she was. Burt silently accepted the tissue offered to him and blew his nose, laughing shakily with Sarah at the fact that he was getting emotional over something which he had never thought would move him in such a way in some random woman's office.

As Burt drove the short journey home from the clinic later on, pamphlets safely upon the passenger seat, he thought over the words he had spoken in the office and nodded to himself when he realised that he meant every damn word that left his mouth. He then found himself strongly hoping that Blaine was with Kurt when he arrived home, just so he could see the loving, gentle looks that graced their faces whenever they were in each other's presence. Burt also hoped more than anything that Blaine would just wake up and smell the coffeeand finally realise just how much he liked the boy in front of him.

And if Kurt and Blaine ever did find their happiness together eventually... well, Burt would be able to sleep very, very soundly from then on. But it was time to just sit back and watch... and wait for nature to take its course.