Cute Yet Disturbing

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Mochi England: I would like to thank Liss-Sama, Death Before Darkness, dewdrop721, Cifer10, xXMelloYelloXx, Ru Tsuna, mitzie-chan219, iTorchic, wretchedheartbreak, awesomeninja234, Mossears of Riverclan, Angel of the Midnight Sea, Map of the Stars, DoubleyHaruhi96, 2bblue101, and Kitsune Freak for supporting this story. *blushes while stuttering* I-It means a lot to the author and us mochis… Just don't go stealing us away, you gits!

Me: That's right! Steal them away after I'm done with them!

Mochi England: Precisely- W-WAIT, WHAT?

Me: So that means you can steal them…now!

*Mochi America and Mochi England get taken away*

Mochi England: NOO! SOD OFF! I DON'T WANT TO BE TAKEN AWAY!

Mochi America: *laughs heroically*

Me: *waves good-bye* Have fun~

Inspired by Mameshiba! Enjoy! :D

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia

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France and a group of beautiful women laughed together. They all sat at a huge round table in a fancy restaurant and they all wore formal attire.

"Francis, darling! You're hysterical!" a woman with gorgeous curly brown hair and a white smile giggled. Francis smiled warmly.

"What can I say? I'm just a humorous guy," he bragged. Then, he took the woman's hand and kissed the back of it before winking. "Although I never joke around when it comes to l'amour…"

All the ladies swooned. The curly haired woman giggled and blushed madly.

At that moment, France's back pocket began to sing.

I'm awesome!

No you're not, dude don't lie

I'm awesome!

I'm drivin' around in my mom's ride

I'm awesome!

A quarter of my life gone by

And I met all my friends online, Motherfu…

The women gawked at France. He nervously laughed. "Er…un moment s'il vous plait!"

He hastily got up from his chair and retreated to a quiet place behind a fake ficus tree. "Oui, Prussia?" he greeted with a tired sigh after answering his cell phone.

"Francis! Dude! What the fuck, man? Where are you!" France heard Prussia shriek. He winced and pulled the phone away from his ear.

"I'm just…enjoying the luxuries of life, mon copain," he dodged the question.

"Oh, yeah, "luxuries of life", which translates to "you're hanging out with some hot chicks without Gilbert and Antonio"! I thought we were supposed to go drinking together tonight?"

"Oui, but um… I came across this, uh…"

"Francis, darling! What's the hold up?" the same curly brown-haired woman called to him. The other ladies told him to hurry up as well.

"Look, I can't talk right now. I'm…busy."

"Are you serious? You're bailing on us? I can't believe this! I thought we were supposed to honor the code, huh? Bros before hos, Francis! Bros before-"

France hung up on him and quickly rejoined his group. "Sorry for the wait. Where were we?"

"You're just in time! They're bringing our food now!" a blond woman with sky blue eyes informed cheerfully. France grinned.

"It's about time! They really shouldn't keep such dazzling young ladies waiting."

The women swooned again and sighed dreamily. The waiters came around to each of them and presented them their food.

"And for you Monsieur Bonnefoy, Saumon Fumé!" the waiter declared, placing a silver plate with a fancy silver lid on top in front of him. France licked his lips as the waiter lifted the lid.

BUUURP! A mochi burped loudly in France's face. The waiter staggered backwards and widened his eyes in shock. France, the women, and the waiters all gasped in horror.

"Bonjour!" the mochi greeted, bouncing off the silver plate and onto France's shoulder. The mochi had stubble and held a red rose. "Did you know? It is said that a man's beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex or thinks about it."

…

…

…

The women watched France's beard closely.

It did indeed look like it was growing before their very eyes.

"Ladies! Wait, s'il vous plait!" France called out to them desperately as they stomped angrily away. He grabbed the brown-haired woman's arm and begged, "I wasn't even thinking about that! I would never think about that, Gabrielle!"

"LIAR!" she spat in his face and yanked her arm away from his grasp. She then slapped him and huffed, "SOME GENTLEMAN YOU ARE! AND MY NAME'S STEPHANIE, YOU DIRTY PERVERT!"

France watched her and the others storm out of the restaurant. Once they were out of sight, he got on his hands and knees and hung his head. "Why is it always me…?"

Someone tapped him on the shoulder. He looked up at the waiter with teary eyes. "Oui…?"

"Your bill, sir," the waiter stated, handing him the bill. He took it listlessly and read it.

…

"HOW MUCH?" he shouted in despair.

The mochi just giggled.

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Disclaimer: France's ringtone for Prussia is the song "I'm Awesome" by Spose.

The Bad Touch Trio are the reason for making me raise the rating to this fanfic~ XD

By the way, seeing a pattern yet? X3