(A/N) I apologise for the delay in this chapter. While I was away I was busy moving house and I had no time to update.

This chapter is brought to you courtesy of my unstoppable squeeing fan girl mode, which I am locked in, because I just went to see Singham at the cinema!

This is really just a short filler chapter, while I work on the next one.

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LABYRINTH: A PARODY

THE SEQUEL

CHAPTER FIVE

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Sarah grabbed a giant axe and began to hack through the entrance doors. With every blow a cloud of glitter exploded into the air. Sarah coughed, choking on the silly sparkles.

"Where did you get that axe?" Dobby inquired, just as Sarah stuck her head through the hole she had made and shouted:

"Heeeerrrree's SARAH!"

"Where did you get that face?" Sarah snapped back, hacking the remaining wood to pieces.

Dobby glared at her and typed an entry into FML:

Today I had to listen to two full retards make innuendo about cake. FML.

Sarah was in a vindictive mood. "Is it true that when you were born the doctor turned around and slapped your mother?"

Dobby wanted to slap her, "IS IT TRUE THAT YOU'RE AN IDIOT?" he screamed.

"I was only joking, Duffer, don't get so worked up."

With that, Sarah grabbed her boom box and put her ipod earphones in her ears. Then, swaying her hips like a slutty chav, she walked through the hole she had made and into the Labyrinth. Dobby followed at a close distance, aware that the first strains of a shitty pop song had just begun to play.

Sarah's hair exploded into a giant rats nest and her eyeliner suddenly covered her entire face. "Swagger jagger, swagger jagger," she sang, dancing like a whore, "You should get some of your own, count the money, get your game on…you're a hater, just let it go!"

"NO!" Dobby dropped to his knees and cursed the heavens, "This song sucks but," he cracked an eye open as Sarah continued to gyrate, "Its…so…damn…catchy!"

Sarah now had a couple of fireys back up dancing for her as she rapped badly about how many people chatted about her. Dobby tried to resist, but he couldn't stop the beat. And he couldn't stop his dancin' feet, cos he just could not stand still. The world kept spinning round and round and his heart was keeping time to the speed of sound but he was lost until he heard the drums and found his way…he couldn't stop the beat…"GET ON THE FLOOR!" Sarah ordered, "my swagger's in check!"

Dobby joined in, "You're a hater, just let it go!"

A few seconds later, after the impromptu musical number had been quashed by a sudden bout of heavy rain (sent by Jareth, who really hated chav music).

"What does swagger jagger mean anyway?" Dobby asked seriously.

"It means…" Sarah pouted, "it's something your should have and if you don't, you're a hater. Kiss kiss, I'll see you later."

Dobby sighed. He knew who had swagger jagger, that Kazuya Kamenashi. If only he could be half the effeminate pop star that he was.

"OMG!" Sarah exclaimed, "You write Akame fan fiction?"

Dobby wrenched his laptop from her greasy fingers and turned it off. "Can we just get on with retrieving that twit's ipod?"

"FIINNNNNEEE!" Sarah kicked him twice, just to show how pissed off she was. It appeared that returning to the Labyrinth had also caused her to regress back to her dumbass teenage mindset. Not that there was much difference, mind you.

"This just goes on and on," Sarah sighed, "there aren't any turns or corners or anything!"

Dobby felt something crunch beneath his foot and he looked down. He had just stepped on the skeletal body of Willem the worm. There was a miniature cup of tea beside him. It was a terrible waste of a life lost just because Jareth needed to get some.

Beside him, Sarah had started to sing 'Friday' by Rebecca Black. Dobby slammed her head into the wall.

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