The Best Man Always Wins

"Oh, there is no way this turns into a tie…"

John let the black strip of fabric dangle between his fingers. Using some form of origami, he was expected to transform the bit of cloth into a bow tie. That was his problem with fancy dress clothing. Always complicated. He would take a jersey and a pair of jeans over a tuxedo any day of the week.

A soft chuckle from behind him made him turn around. Randy stood in the open doorway, dressed in an impeccable navy blue suit. He was a man who was born to wear such attire. John was positive Randy never felt the least bit awkward or uncomfortable in that outfit. It fit his frame like a dream. Molded his shoulders perfectly. Not a stray line or ugly bump to be found. Like he stepped off the pages of one of those wedding magazines.

Not that John had ever so much as glanced at one.

Randy patiently held out his hand. "Let me have it."

More than willing to oblige, John transferred the untied tie as if it were about to come alive and bite his thumb off. "I'm not cut out for this."

"Dave asked you to be his best man and you agreed." Without being asked, Randy set about the task of making John look presentable. Starting with his tie. "You knew exactly what you were getting into. Shoulders down, please."

In fact, John had been honored that Dave had thought of him. The two of them had had a rocky start. Much like he and Randy. Along with just about everyone Randy ever came in contact with. The point was that John had been caught up in the wedding spirit. Dave had been so happy; the man could not stop grinning. The sheer amount of joy was almost obscene. If Batista wanted Cena to be a part of his special day, John would not turn him down.

"I thought the only thing I had to worry about was the speech." Nimble fingers worked their magic, accomplishing the impossible. John watched in unmasked awe as Randy, through a series of twists and turns, fashioned the bow tie around his neck. "Which I'm still not sure about."

Tie done, Randy smoothed his hands down the front of John's shirt. "It'll be fine as long as you don't include the words drunk, naked, or Honest, Officer, I was only giving the lady a ride."

John smiled, despite his nerves. Even though he could be pig-headed and arrogant and obnoxious and even downright rude, Randy always knew what to say to calm John down. Also knew how to rile him up, too. "Is this your way of getting me to relax?"

The smirk on Randy's face would have tempted a saint. "Well, I have much more interesting methods up my sleeve, but we are in a church. Don't much feel like getting struck by lightning today." Somehow, John had managed to button his vest wrong. Very wrong. Like he had gotten dressed in the dark. "I swear, you and buttons never get along."

"Maybe I did it on purpose so you'd have to redress me." Randy would never let him go out in public looking like a slob.

"I thought you preferred it when I undressed you, John-boy."

"House of God," Cena reminded him.

Soon there remained nothing left to fix. John was as perfect as he would ever be. Which was pretty damn perfect in Randy's eyes.

"It could be worse," noted Randy as he took the time to admire himself in the full-length mirror. He had made a point to dress down a bit, so as to not outshine any members of the wedding party. Still, he couldn't help it if he was naturally stunning. "Imagine what the groom is going through."

John had to concede the point. "Yeah, I guess it would suck to be in Dave's shoes. Then you wouldn't be able to put your finishing touches on me."

"Why's that?"

There was a rapid knock at the door. "Showtime, John."

Frantic slapping of his pockets let John know that he had not, in fact, lost the rings. It was his sixteenth time checking since entering the church. Striding towards the door, he answered Randy's questioning gaze. "Because it would be bad luck to see me before the ceremony. Everyone knows that."

He did his best to suppress his grin as Randy's incredulous "WHAT?" echoed into the hallway.

END