Author's Notes: Hello, people of FF! Been in a writing mood lately and decided to post this story. But please note that this is a side project. Meaning that you shouldn't be surprised if it goes months at a time without an update. Anyway, please, enjoy and please review!

Courageous Ed

Chapter 1: All I want for my Birthday…

Dawn rose over the horizon and crept between the blinds, casting their brilliant rays upon the sleeping figure of a young boy. Drool rolled down his cheeks and sleep caked his eyelids shut, ignoring the sun's harsh light. He tossed gently in his large circular bed in his wife-beater, muttering quotes of various aliases for the word money. Suddenly, the alarm blared, ringing so violently it defied gravity and actually lifted itself up into the air. A hand instantly slammed upon it, sending it back down onto the nightstand. The boy was now completely upright, drool mysteriously gone along with his sleep, a large grin framing his face.

"Finally, I thought this day would never get here!" the small boy exclaimed

He then jumped out of bed and raced into the door that led to his shower. The sound of the faucet turning, water running, draining, brushing, spitting, and flushing all blended together into an indistinguishable blur inside of a handful of seconds. When he emerged from the wash room, he was dressed in what was known to his peers as his signature attire of a yellow bowling shirt with a red strip down the right side with well-worn blue pants and rather plain red shoes. He combed his three strand of hair backwards with his hand and turned smugly to the mirror. Jumping onto a chair so he'd be level with looking glass, he started one of infamous pep-talks…with himself.

"Who's turning the big one-three today?" he asked to his reflection "You are; that's who!"

"No more pre-teen for this guy! Cause now, it's all about me, as usual." His reflection mimicked his conceited actions.

He then jumped down from his chair and swaggered towards the door.

"Today's gonna be great." He quoted as he closed the door behind himself

CCC

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EDDY!" the duo of Edd and Ed shouted

Ed blew a party favor, letting out a weak raspberry as Edd threw out a handful of colorful confetti. Eddy looked at the attempt of a festive display with dull and bored eyes, but he thankfully, nonetheless. Seeing as how his constant scams on the neighboring kids had made him into a social pariah, he was glad to have his two friends with him on such an important day. That didn't mean he had to show, though.

"Congratulations on another full year of life, Eddy. May you have many more filled with equal or greater joy." Double D said thoughtfully

"Yeah and filled with gravy too." Ed blurted out happily

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Where's the presents!" Eddy asked greedily

Indeed, if there was one thing the small boy liked just as much as money, it was presents. Even the small piles of gifts in front of him made his mouth water, mind wilder than a lion on the savanna. He reached out for the nearest gift, which was wrapped sloppily in green paper and tied together with multiple rows of clear tap wrapped around each other. Tearing through the paper with frantic pace, his face became crestfallen when he beheld a small, red thermometer.

"That's mine!" Ed shouted happily "My mom said it was first rectal thermometer from when I was a baby."

Upon hearing the word 'rectal', both he and Edd broke out into a panic as he dropped the medical instructment onto the floor. Rubbing his hand fiercely on his shirt and then the table when he realized what he had just rubbed on his shirt. He quickly moved on to the next gift, which was wrapped neatly in purple and adorned with white ribbon tied into a perfect bow. He tore through the colorful wrapping with near animalistic hunger and then beheld what was inside.

"What the heck is this?" Eddy asked as he held up a complex contraption

"That's a Mathlete, Eddy. It's rather wondrous device containing an abacus, calculator, protractor, sextant, and even a built-in pencil sharpener!" the smart lad explained, simply giddy with excitement.

Eddy glanced at the object in his hand before unceremoniously chucking the thing over his shoulder and into the trash can. Double D became frantic as he rushed towards the disposal to retrieve the object as Eddy unwrapped another present. He groaned audibly when gazed at the contents of the gift: a pair of socks. He tossed the box at his tall friend, who caught it with his face. He opened the next, a buttoned up vest, and tossed it into Ed's already damaged face. These were obviously gifts from his parents, seeing as they never got him anything he wanted but everything he needed. Then, a particular gift caught his eye. It was wrapped in peculiar pink and green striped wrapping with a fancy red ribbon around the top. It also had a tag attached to it, which only made it more enticing. So, being curious, he reached out and yanked at the tab.

'Dear nephew, for your special day, I think you need a special gift. Please, take extra care of this gift as I'm sure it'll bring you good luck and great times. From your Aunt Muriel'

Eddy blinked a few times as he read the tab, an ominous feeling creeping into his mind. Shaking off the strange sensation, he quickly opened the box, which had holes poked through its lid and reached deep inside. What he pulled out left the trio speechless. It was a dog with oddly pink fur with a large spot on their back with a purple collar with a name tag. A dog…which had been sent by his Aunt…as a gift…for his thirteenth birthday. Eddy stared into the dog's eyes, who stared back at him. The dog gave the boy a warm smile to which Eddy responded with a quirked brow.

"Cool! A pink dirt beast!" Ed hollered

"I think you mean to say dog, Ed. And yes, it certainly is unusual to find a dog with such a strange fur coat." Double D mused to himself

"Yeah, that's great and all, but mind explaining why my aunt sent me a dog? A…" he looked the dog hard "boy dog named…" he gripped the name tag between his figures "Courage?"

He looked at the round piece of metal for several more seconds before he finally sat the dog down. He stared up at the short Ed, which wasn't very far, and smiled once more and wagged his stub of a tail. Eddy's expression, however, was one of irritation.

"So what the heck am I suppose to do with this guy?" Eddy asked to his two companions

"Beats the heck outta me, Eddy." Ed shrugged happily

"I think some time to get to know Courage would be the best course of action." Double D said as he escorted Ed and himself towards the door.

"Hey, wait! What about the scam?" Eddy asked

"Not to worry, Eddy. We'll be ready and waiting whenever you're done." Edd said and closed the door.

The entire room went silent. With his parents gone off to work, the only ones in the house were the dog and himself. For a while the two just started at each other, waiting for some sort of reaction from the other. Eddy was the one to break the silence and moved towards the box the dog had arrived in; rummaging through the cardboard cube in search of something else that might be hidden inside. What he found was a small, yellow, red, and purple yo-yo. The boy played with the whimsical toy for a brief moment before turning his attention back to the dog, which looked at him with pleading eyes.

"Okay, I'll bite. Whaddaya you want?" the boy asked

The dog placed a paw on his stomach, which growled noisily, and whined helplessly. Eddy groaned and walked over to the cupboards, searching through the oak selves for something to satisfy his new dog's hunger. Pushing aside the various nauseating cans of vegetables his parents insisted on buying, he finally wrapped his fingers around the cold steel of a certain can. Pulling it out, he blew off the accumulated dust and brushed the remaining away to reveal the colorful label of a dog giving a thumbs up and eating a spoonful of dog food. Digging through the drawer, he produced a can opener and a bowl, followed by letting the mush drop sickeningly slow into a wet mass into said dish.

"Eat up." He said and chucked the tin can into the garbage.

Maybe it was the fact that he was still working off the adrenaline of it being his birthday or maybe it was that he was simply too bored to notice, but either way he had forgotten that this particular can of food was from when he had own a puppy…over ten years ago. The mush was far pasted its expiration date and had already started to attract flies, which were dying upon contact. Courage looked at the pile of food curiously before taking a sniff, gripping his nose and resisting the urge to regurgitate whatever was left in his system as a result of his repulsiveness.

"Got any dry food?" a voice asked

"I dunno. My folks don't take to me to the store that-"Eddy stopped what he was doing, which was toying around with the yo-yo, and turned around.

The boy swiveled his head from side-to-side rapidly, looking for the source of the voice.

"Who said that?" Eddy asked

"Um…I did." The voice said, coming from the small dog on the floor

For a moment, time seemed to slow down and every possible thought about the current object of attention flashed through Eddy's vain skull. The dog just talked. The dog…just talked. The pink dog named Courage, who was sent by his Aunt who he'd only seen a handful of times, just talked. After repeatedly repeating the statement in sundry forms in his head, time resumed and the boy freaked out, rocketing from his seat to the ceiling. His head impacted the pale colored paint and cracked it in several places before falling back down to his seat.

"YOU CAN TALK!" Eddy hollered incredulously as he stated the question

"Of course I can talk or my name's Aloysius…And it's not." He replied

"But you're a dog! Dogs don't talk! They drool and chase mailmen and drink outta the toilet!"

"Hey, I'll have you know toilet water is a lot cleaner than tap." Courage rebutted

Hearing that little tidbit of news, he wrung out his tongue as tight as he could. Afterwards, he grabbed the dog and headed out the door and towards Edd's house.

Edd wiped a beat of sweat from his forehead and stepped back to observe the fruits of his morning labor. Eddy was known to be quite demanding and spontaneous when it came to his scams, so when he had asked him to design a 'Triple E Megalomatic Washer', he simply went straight to work. It had taken quite a bit of looking before he had managed to find the parts needed and had Ed lug it all back to his suburban dwelling. Multiple chutes sucked in air at twister velocity as a crudely improvised tube ran underground and to the pond in Ed's back yard. Powered and liquid cleaning agents were held inside large jugs that were connects to hoses that ran to the machine, which gleamed pure white in the sunlight in the form of an over-sized washing machine.

Next to it was a slightly smaller, dull blue dryer with a giant fan standing in place for the back of the cleaning machine. For what it was worth, the two were both some of his best work. It almost pained him to think that these two marvels of ingenuity would be destroyed soon after use, most likely by the loveable oaf that had helped build it. It was as he was admiring the beauty of it that Eddy came running, clutching Courage and looking practically hysterical.

"Eddy, what's wrong? Are either of you hurt?" Double D asked

"Guys, you'll never believe this!" Eddy screamed

"I don't believe it." Ed said absentmindedly

The short boy held the pink dog high in the air "THIS DOG CAN TALK!" he shouted

Of course, all he received in respond was silence from both his friends and the dog. He gripped the dog tightly and shook him back and forth, yelling "Talk! Talk, you stupid dog!"

"Eddy please!" Edd said as he grabbed his friend's arms "You'll hurt the poor canine."

"This dog can talk! Watch!" the hysterical Ed claimed and sat the dog on the ground "Go ahead. Speak."

"Did you really have shake me like tha-"Courage started

Double D and Ed both gave a bemused quirk of the head as they listened to the dog bark out gibberish, which Eddy seemed to understand.

"-and then call me a stupid dog?"

"Hey, I wouldn't have done it if you'd have just talked." Eddy said back bitterly

"Um…Eddy? I don't mean to sound rude but-"

"We can't understand 'im, Eddy!" Ed blurted stupidly

"What? He's talking clear as Ed's head. How can you not understand him?" Eddy asked loudly

"We're sorry Eddy, but all we hear is a dog barking. Maybe you should lie down and get some rest? I'm sure all the adrenaline from the excitement of today has simply caused you to hallucinate." Edd reasoned

Eddy growled and snatched Courage from the ground. Turning his back to his friends, his eyes fell upon a boy carrying around a piece of 2x4. The boy with the fuzz covered cranium was known locally as the 'Nature boy' and as such had a knowledge of the particularly weird. He ran towards him screaming "Hey, Johnny!"with Courage in his outstretched arms. However, in his hurried frenzy, he failed to notice the soap foam that had been so carelessly overlooked on the ground.

"Eddy! Look out!" Edd hollered

But alas, it was too late. The birthday boy had stepped on the soap and slid wildly fast towards one of the chutes, which had been conveniently placed in front of him. There was nothing he could do to stop his inevitable collision and the pain that was sure to follow, but luckily for Courage, Eddy had thrown up his arms as they collided with the chute leaving him outside. The chute sucked in the poor boy and the three looked on as his body dented and left large full body imprints in the flimsy metal. He was then dropped into the washer, which churned uproariously as cleaning agents were pumped into it. The small Ed was then ejected into the dryer, being thrown about like a ragdoll before the circular door opened and released him.

Ed, Edd, and Courage looked at the now blown dried Eddy, hair looped and curled and clothes slightly damp. His expression was one of bewilderment and shock, which were validated as the entire structure behind him gave way and crumbled to the ground into nothing. Edd opened his mouth to say something to console his friend but Eddy beat him to the punch and grabbed his dog.

"Don't…say…anything." He said in a serious tone and marched off towards his home.

CCC

Night had fallen quickly and Eddy had chosen to spend the remainder of his supposed 'special day' in bed, under his sheets in peaceful solitude. He had dimmed his lava lamp to just the right shade and was preparing to drift off into sleep when suddenly a familiar whining caught his attention. He attempted to ignore it, but conceded after ten straight minutes of the incessant noise.

"What?" he growled impatiently over his bed

Below, Courage was sitting in his bed which Eddy had hastily laid down as newspaper. It was no real surprise that he was a bit cold.

"Can I?" Courage asked sweetly

"…Fine, whatever. Just don't go hogging the bed." Eddy warned

The pink dog smiled and leapt onto the circular mattress, pacing in place a few times below settling at the foot of the bed. Eddy, seeing the dog take a place, turned on his side and fell asleep. Courage, too, was tired and closed his eyes, enjoying the most peaceful sleep he'd had in weeks.

Author's Notes: Yep, this is going to be an Eddy centric story. Also, I'm sure people are wondering why I put Courage with Eddy. Its simple: Eddy is the one least likely to have a pet and even less likely to actually enjoy having one. But he's also the one who'd benefit the most from having Courage. My Reasons: if Ed got Courage, he'd probably just hug him to death and if Double D got him, there wouldn't really be room for character development. Eddy, however, has so many vices that developing his character is easy and fun. Plus, I just think Courage and Eddy just go together. Anyway, remember that this is a side project and that updates will be sporadic. TTFN!