Celebrate

Patrick Jane's birthday is near- which doesn't matter, since he's not celebrating it. Never. But hey- why not change a habit sometimes? Lisbon likes the plan at first- but she has no idea what she's gotten herself into until it's too late…post-"Strawberries & Cream".

It's M- surprise, Hmmm? And, honestly: if you don't like M-stories, I wouldn't advise against this one. I have some kinky ideas, I'm afraid, so…READER BEWARE!

Disclaimer: I don't own the Mentalist- he's just too wonderful to be left alone!

Chapter 1

A sunny summer afternoon found CBI-consultant Patrick Jane drowsing on his favorite couch. Again.

Oh yeah, slow times at the office. No spectacular cases around, and Jane felt a trifle bored. Very bored, to say the truth. He'd even run out of reasons to pester agent Lisbon, so he just lay there, watching the spots on the ceiling change their shape before his very eyes, listening to agent Rigsby's sub-optimal whistling.

Rigsby tried to be a brave little soldier today. He was working at a file report, taking over some of the dreaded paperwork from agent Lisbon. Mr. Nice Guy.

Suddenly Rigsby hooted.

"Well, well, Mr. Jane", he exclaimed, "I have your birth date right before me on this form! I never saw it anywhere before…I didn't know you even had something as flashy as a birth date..."

"Yes, I know I'm old", Jane sighed," but believe me: I'm feeling much older sometimes…"

"That's not what I was referring to, grandpa", Rigsby chuckled, "but this date here is only a week from now- it's birthday time, my friend! So, where's the party?"

"About a decade ago", Jane snorted, "I'm not into parties anymore, Rigsby. So, thank you very much- but I have to decline."

"You never celebrate your birthday?", Rigsby asked incredulously.

"Nope", Jane said," to say the truth, I keep forgetting the date myself- it's a week from now, you said? Interesting…I'm a summer boy, then. I'm sure that's responsible for my oh so lovable character, don't you think? Let me ponder this while I sleep…"

He rolled over onto his side, turning his back on Rigsby.

"You know, Jane", Rigsby said after a while," life waits for no one. Red John is dead for some time now. And you're still here. So what do you plan to do with the rest of your existence? Suffer 'til you had your fill? Brace yourself, boy- you'll never get finished with suffering. But you could try living for a change. Nothing's wrong with a birthday party, you know? Having some good time with your friends. A little laughter in your life. Doesn't hurt anybody, that's for sure."

Jane didn't answer.

But he found himself still thinking about Rigsby's little speech two hours later.

Most agents were preparing to leave by then, and agent Lisbon walked around instructing her staff members on the tasks at hand. Not that there were many, but the woman just couldn't stop working. Couldn't just relax.

Jane still lay on the couch, now facing the bullpen, brooding.

Relax. Could he? Rigsby was right. He hadn't had any real fun since he'd been released from prison. He'd come back to the Serious Crimes Unit and resumed working. End of story.

Agent Lisbon passed by his couch on her way to van Pelts desk. Jane watched her. She had such a sweet butt- he never could stop looking at it. How tiny she was. Like a little elf. A pretty tough little elf, but an elf nonetheless. And those eyes…huge like saucers, and green like the most precious of gems. Like an angry ocean under the onslaught of whipping winds.

So- should he live again? Or was an existence all he deserved? He hadn't thrown a party in a lifetime. But hey…he had an idea or two. The biggest miracle of all: he had friends. Most people at CBI liked him well enough.

Agent Lisbon sauntered over to Cho, and Jane got mesmerized by the slight swing of her hips. Tiny hips. Every man would feel like a bear with a woman like her. Such a sweet, small princess…though she could certainly kill most men with a flick of her hand. But she looked like the softest of women, so petite, so just enough to fill his hands…

He would need a place to party. He'd sold the villa in Malibu and hadn't found anything new at the moment. Right now he stayed at the attic permanently. And he sure as hell couldn't celebrate his birthday there.

How could legs so slim be so strong at the same time? He had seen her run. Boy, could this woman run. Made him wonder what those legs would feel like wrapped around his waist. She could possibly kill with them. Cut off blood circulation with a distinctive squeeze. Beautiful death.

Hadn't agent Lisbon moved some months ago? Yes, he remembered now. Little bungalow. With a generously sized garden. She'd shown some pictures around.

He watched her strolling back into her office. When the door closed behind her, he got up.

xxMentalistxx

Teresa Lisbon sighed. Okay, it was boring. No…damn. She should be lucky nobody got killed, shouldn't she? Possibly too hot even for killers at the moment- Sacramento all but melted under a heat wave.

She pushed her hands through her hair and opened the file next to her. Her chance to catch up on some paperwork.

She sighed when the door opened and Jane strode in. Of course- he was possibly bored out of his pants. Oh oh, not a good thought- it would take hours to get the image out of her head now, well done, agent Lisbon….

"Can I help you, Jane?", she asked briskly.

Jane sat down on her couch, lolling on the soft cushions.

"Well", he said, "I wanted to inform you that I'm going to throw a party next Friday on the occasion of my birthday. And you're invited…of course."

He flashed her his most dashing smile.

Lisbon was stunned speechless. She knew it was his birthday next Friday, of course. And she had never talked to him about it again since he had reacted so harshly when she'd congratulated him the first time- just after he'd joined her team. It was pretty obvious he didn't like to celebrate. So she was- surprised. Positively so, she found. He had been to hell and back. Sure, she still hadn't forgotten that he'd killed Red John. That he was living proof of her ultimate failure. That she couldn't protect him, not even from himself.

But he didn't deserve to suffer endlessly. Didn't deserve to be a walking corpse, just working, eating, sleeping. In the attic. The cold, dusty attic. All alone.

Suddenly, warmth filled her heart to the brim. Yes, she had always hoped that one day, he would be happy again. Maybe a party was a good start.

She smiled softly- she liked him. Hell, she more than liked him…nothing indecent of course…though the way he looked right now, sprawled on her couch, legs spread, hand rubbing over his chest…she shook her head to push the thoughts away.

"Oh, Jane", she murmured, blushing slightly, "that's…great. Really, it's a wonderful idea. And- of course I'll be there."

"Well, Lisbon," he smiled ," that would hardly be avoidable, since the party will be at your house, or at your garden, to be precise- what do you think, maybe you should give me a spare key, so I can let myself in when I have some preparations to do? That would make the whole business a lot easier…."

"Wait a moment!", Lisbon interrupted, now flushed with anger," Are you crazy? No way you're gonna throw a party at MY home! It's brand new and I don't want it destroyed…impaired…whatever! I don't want you anywhere near it!"

"Why, Lisbon", he pouted, feigning indignation, "I'm offended. I would never trash your home! And if you refuse to place your house at my disposal, I can't have a party. I can't celebrate my birthday"- he looked pointedly at her with sad puppy dog eyes- "in the attic."

Lisbon felt like cursing, but she bit back the urge. Damn him. She didn't want him in her house. She was absolutely sure he would wreak havoc one way or the other.

But damn- how could she refuse him when he looked at her with those eyes?

She winced.

"Okay", she growled, everything inside her screaming that this was wrong, so wrong," you can have a garden party at my place. But you pay for anything you break! And NO spare key!"

He smiled his killer smile, and she instantly regretted what she had just done.

"Well", Jane drawled, "then I just have to knock on your door every time I need access."

Yes. She definitely regretted it.

Okay…how's that for a start? I wanted to write something lighthearted next, and a good friend was so kind to remind me that I didn't have a party yet- did I? It's time then. Let's see what Jane pulls off…

Please review! Otherwise, I just stop here- you can't want that, can you :D?