Just a very short story, inspired after listening to Daughtry`s "There and back again" tonight. I briefly thought about continuing this with Kono and Chin taking turns on Steve´s bed and maybe even Catherine. Not sure though.

As always, Feedback is greatly appreciated and I´d love to know what you think about it.

Disclaimer: Nothing is mine!

"Do you ever listen to me, huh? I mean, is it just me who thinks that no matter what you suggest in situations like this, it´s always going to end with you being shot? Did you ever consider – just for a brief second – that you could trust your partner to have your back? No! Because you are SuperSEAL, the only one on this planet to save us from the bad guys!"

Dannys rant couldn´t hide the fact that his inside was raw with worry and pain. His rambling had only one purpose, to distract himself from the fact that his partner, Lt. Cmdr. Steve McGarrett, was badly hurt during one of his one-man-missions, nearly loosing his life and still being closer to death than life right now.

Danny couldn´t face the truth. He wasn´t ready to admit that he was goddamn afraid to loose his best friend, the only man he´d ever consider close enough to being a brother. The man who annoyed the hell out of him, that pissed him of countless times with a shrug or a smile instead of an explanation. The man who always had his back, who always would throw himself in the line of fire instead of Danny getting hit. The man who´d give his life to protect his partner, his friend, so that a little girl wouldn´t have to be told that her "Danno" died in the line of duty.

"I think you´re having serious control issues, Steve! Maybe you should consider a therapy. You know, it´s never healthy to lift all the weight only on your shoulders and trying to stand up on your own. I can´t believe I´m actually the one who has to tell you this, but THAT is what a team is for!" with a resigned sigh Danny rubbed his hand over his face, as if that would make everything okay and rub the exhaustion and worry and fear away. If it was only that easy.

He was sitting in a hospital, again. With his partner being the patient in the bed, connected to all kinds of monitors to control his breathing, his heartbeat, his temperature and god knows what else. Danny was tired, so terribly tired. Of sitting in one of those ugly, uncomfortable chairs by the bedside, waiting for a sign of recovery. He actually had spend countless times in a hospital room like this, waiting and trying to coax his partner into waking up by ranting for hours. And the hard plastic of the chairs, that was so unforgiving that his made his back and his ass hurt whenever he managed to get up, all that added only to the sad fact that again, Steve McGarrett had saved his life.

"You know, I wonder if it´s a personal thing, if fate has decided that whenever things get dangerous or tend to spiral out of control, it has to make sure that you are around. No wait, not only around but in the middle of it. You have to be in the line of fire or in the middle of an explosion or... jumping from a building or whatever. You just have to! No way working around it."

"I knew that something bad would happen today. Remember I told you this morning that it would be a bad day? Remember it? Well, I was right, wasn´t I? You got shot. But you wouldn´t believe me, no. You were saying that things would be okay. That I should trust you. Now, lets get this clear, SuperSEAL, you were wrong! You hear me? Nothing is okay now!" Danny´s shoulders slumped down as if the weight of the world, the weight that Steve carried so willingly, was suddenly dumped on him.

"I hate seeing you like this, partner." he murmured.

There was no way and no need hiding it anymore. Steve couldn´t hear him. He wouldn´t complain and he wouldn´t know that Danny was feeling helpless and that he was scared.

"I´ve been in a room just like this countless times. And most of the times you were the one in the bed. I have waited hours, days, for you to wake up. To recover. I´ve seen the ugly side of the truth, Steve. I´ve seen you bleed red just like we all do. You feel pain and you can get hurt... and I´m afraid that one day I´ll sit in a chair like this and just have to realize that you, SuperSEAL, can die, just like we all can."

Danny swallowed a lump in his throat, willing down the tears.

"I know that you think you can handle everything. That your training makes you unbreakable. But do you ever – just for a second – think about your team? Do you ever think about how Kono will feel when something really bad happens to you? You´re her hero, you know?" Danny can´t help the smile on his face, a small one that doesn´t reach his eyes. But it´s there, for a second, before it changes into a frown.

"Or Chin. That guy is so tough and cool. I sometimes think he can stop a Tsunami just by standing in its way and talking with that fucking comforting voice that makes you just want to listen to him. He needs to know that he won´t loose you as well, just like he´d lost his old partner, his job, his badge and his family."

"Or think of Gracie. My daughter adores you, she woships the ground you walk on. She truly believes your a superhero and you can make the world spin in the other direction just by using your willpower. That little girl has painted you a picture every day since you got here. Every, freaking day. And in every picture you´re the hero, saving her Daddy. She really...," Danny clears his throat. "she needs you to wake up to save her Danno. Because apparently in her mind, I´m not capable of doing that myself."

Slowly Danny stood up from the chair and stretched his back, a painful moan on his lips. He walked over to the window and opened it, letting some cool, fresh air into the room to get rid of the sterile hospital smell that he knew Steve hated. He watched the stars for a moment, seeing them shine brightly and twinkle. He never would admit it to anyone, but they were so much brighter then they were in New Jersey.

Danny wasn´t sure if he liked Hawaii. It was hot. It was sunny. It was laid back. And it was full of beautiful people. But he knew one thing for sure, he loved his new family. They grew on him, day by day. With every case. Every time one of them had his back. Every time they were able to book the bad guy. Every time they shared a laugh. And every time they saved each others life. Hawaii became his home, because of his family.

Slowly he turned back to the still figure in the white sheets that looked more vulnerable and more helpless then anything he had ever seen. Danny knew that this time, Steve was hurt bad. Like really, really bad. The bullet had raptured his collarbone, caused severe internal bleeding and damaged his spine when leaving his body. Even after surgery it wasn´t clear how much long-term damage – Danny didn´t dare to think of irreparable damage – this bullet had caused.

"I´ve tried to contact Catherine, found her number in your phone..." Danny sighed and rubbed his tired eyes again. "I left a message on her voice mail, not sure she heard it yet. But I thought you´d want her to know. I know Rachel would want to know if it was me."

He moved like an old man back to the chair on the bedside and sat down, his back rigid, his hands balled to fists on his thighs, his eyes never leaving the immobile figure in the bed.

"I remember one time when I got shot back in New Jersey and I woke up 4 days later in the hospital. Rachel was there and I later found out that she had been the whole 4 days, never leaving my side. She knew the name of all nurses that walked into that room, you know. She probably knew more about my status then the nurses because she watched every single move I made. Every breath I took. Every beeping of the monitors. Just... everything. Now, Rachel is a very classy, British lady, we both know that. But you haven´t seen her back then. She was like a mad woman whenever someone tried to convince her to leave me. Don´t tell her that I told you this, okay? She´d kill me."

Again the small smile on his lips faded when he travelled back in time.

"But I was grateful that it was her face I saw first thing I woke up. Her smile. She was there and even though I never told her, that meant the world to me... I guess I should have told her. I know you would tell me that I should have told her. But I thought she knew. I thought she´d read my mind, she´d knew that I would never ever forget that moment. Opening my eyes and seeing her smile. It was like... like I just had to go through all this crap to open my eyes to pure beauty."

Danny chuckled and tugged the blanket around Steve´s immobile body. He saw the bruises, the cuts and the bandage that covered the ugly wound. His partner was pale and Danny wished the grey tan of Steve´s skin would fade just as the bruises and cuts were slowly healing.

"So, I called Catherine and I told her that you got shot while saving my life. That you threw yourself in front of me to keep me from getting killed. And that you´re here, in hospital. I told her that I truly believe that this is what you consider a vacation, lying in bed, immobile, non responsive, connected to machines that help you breath and ignoring the rest of the outside world." Danny´s voice was husky and he rubbed his hand over his chin for a second to lock down his emotions again. "You better wake up and yell at me, if you don´t agree with me. You know, if you don´t want Catherine to come here. Because I´m pretty sure your little Ramboette will get here asap."

His eyes were glued to his partner, desperately willing him to move or to show any sign that he had heard him. But Steve didn´t move. He didn´t flinch. He didn´t open his eyes. And he didn´t yell at Danny. What a fucking crazy world! Right now, Danny wanted nothing more then for Steve to yell at him for worrying Catherine while he was just grazed by the bullet. And Danny felt another portion of his hope vanish. Ever day, every hour that Steve didn´t react made Danny fear that he was slipping through his fingers. He felt like his best friend was drifting further and further away with every tick of the clock. Ever minute that went by seemed to go faster then the previous one.

"You´ve fucked up this time, Steve. Royally fucked up." Danny hissed and his voice was thick with emotions. He felt it. He knew that this time was different from all the other times he had seen his partner in a hospital bed. He knew that this time, the battle his partner was fighting, was so much harder than before. He felt it in his bones. This time could be the last time. And he was scared shitless to admit it but he didn´t know how to help Steve. He didn´t know if he would be able to have his back this time.

"Don´t you dare give up on me now, Steve! You hear me! Don´t you dare taking the easy way out this time just because it´s a long way or because you think you wouldn´t make it. I will not allow you to give up!" Danny grabbed Steve´s hand and squeezed it hard. "I am here. And I deserve the right to kick your ass for doing that. For saving my life. I deserve to be able to tell you what an idiot you are and that you shouldn´t risk your own life for saving mine. I deserve this right because I´m your partner, you hear me?"

His eyes were burning, he hadn´t slept in 48 hours and every single muscle in his body was hurting. But he wouldn´t leave Steve alone, he wouldn´t leave his side. Not now. Not until he woke up.

"You might be a bad ass Navy SEAL, my friend. But I´m a New Jersey detective. I´m a father. I´m a husband. And I´m your friend. And trust me, my will is just as strong as your´s is. I know somewhere in there you can hear me and probably think of a way to kill me for ranting without any pause. But I will not stop! You hear me, Steve? I won´t stop until you wake up and until you tell me to shut the fuck up!"

He watched his partner intently, trying to see even the slightest movement or the tiniest change in his breathing pattern. But there was none. The unnerving beeping of the monitors stayed the same. Nothing had changed, Steve was still lost somewhere between here and there.

"Okay... okay... I´ll just sit here, I´ll close my eyes for a moment and don´t even think about opening your eyes while I´m asleep, okay? I just need a moment..." He leaned back in the chair, trying to find a comfortable position to relax his hurting back. And finally sleep overwhelmed him and he didn´t care about hurting muscles anymore. He just needed to sleep and to gather all his strength because he knew, his partner needed him to guide him back.