Ice Cream, a Naruto oneshot
by Expensive Gum
Summary: It was a hot day in Konoha, the sun beating down on shinobi and citizens alike. Unbeknownst to them, however, a certain ninja was desperately avoiding someone... LEMON!
Author's notes: Hi. This story is rated M for a lemon. Dedicated to Sugarsnike (see author's notes at bottom ;-;)

"hurr" indicates speech
'hurp' indicates thought.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything apart from the story. All ownership of the Naruto series goes to its respective owners. Peace out motherfuckers.
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It was a hot summer day in Konoha, and the sun was beating down. News reports had said that it was the hottest summer in the Village Hidden in the Leaves for 10 years. As a result, a shirtless Naruto decided to train, hoping that the harsh conditions would increase his strength and endurance. As he formed a shadow clone, creating a Rasengan with child's grace, he realized he was covered in sweat and dirt. As he rushed towards another shadow clone, thrusting the Rasengan into its stomach, he realized another thing: he was starving.

'My stomach will have to wait' Naruto thought to himself as he gritted his teeth as the shadow clones launched themselves at him, much like kamikaze bombers. Throwing a few punches and deflecting some of the blows that were directed to him, he substituted himself for a log. As the shadow clones looked around confusedly, Naruto was hiding in the darkness of the forest entering sage mode. As he gathered the necessary chakra to form a Rasenshuriken, he thought about Sakura.

'Ah, Sakura' he thought wistfully. She had finally agreed to go out with him, and one little date had turned their relationship into something beautiful. But Tsunade had sent her out on a long term mission, so he was getting awfully lonely. The sound of a twig breaking snapped him out of his reverie as he was blasted with a Rasengan, the force of the impact sending him flying 5 metres into the air, landing in a wide open clearing with a lake. The clones gave him no respite as all but one dispelled and performed a wind jutsu, propelling him into the shallow water. The clone then performed Oiroke no Jutsu on him, giving him a massive nosebleed. Glancing at the female version of him, he couldn't help but feel a stirring, *ahem* down there. In addition, staring at the clone's beautiful form made him realize how lonely he was. Sakura had been gone for 4 months, and was not due back from her mission for six months. He was not worried, she was a capable kunoichi and he had no qualms about letting her go on the mission. But the nights were getting lonely, and his right hand was beginning to lose its charm. The clone (Who shall now be known as Naruko) noticed Naruto's staring, and blushed.

"Naruto-kun, you're staring" giggled Naruko. Since the war had ended, Naruto managed to perfect the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu and make them living things with feelings and personalities. In addition to that, they would no longer disappear in a poof of smoke if struck once. Naruto was wildly praised for this innovation, as it opened up a plethora of battle strategies.

"N-no I'm not!" Naruto stammered nervously. "S-Sakura-chan is the only one for me!" he muttered half-heartedly. Naruko went real close to him, and bent over, showing her perfect curves, her large, full breasts accentuating the curves of her hips, as she fondled his manhood.

"Oh really, Naruto-kun? The bulge in your pants says otherwise!" Naruko teased, as Naruto's cheeks flushed a bright red.

"G-get off me!" Naruto screamed and pushed Naruko off of him. The sight of her curvaceous body, dripping with water was too much for him, he could feel the blood leaking out of his nose. He stood up and ran away as fast as he could, forgetting his shirt, and his sanity.

"Oh, Naruto-kun, you're really funny" giggled Naruko.

Naruto frantically walked through the streets of Konoha to the one place where everything made sense, and quizzically wondered why the hell everyone was looking at him in a weird way, and why nearly the entire female population of Konoha was staring at him with drool running out of their mouths. As he approached his destination, he saw a flash of blonde hair. Shrugging it off, he entered his sanctuary, his second home: Ichiraku Ramen.

"Good morning Naruto-kun!" Ayame smiled, but then her smile dropped as she noticed Naruto's lack of clothes. "Umm, Naruto?"

"What?" Naruto asked irritably.

"Uhh, your, uh, shirt" Ayame blushed but Naruto cut her off.

"Oh, you like my shirt? Thanks, Ayame-chan; it's one of my favourites as well!" Naruto exclaimed, giving her a thumbs up. Ayame sweatdropped.

"No Naruto, it's not that." She deadpanned.

"Well what could it possibly be?" Naruto said frustrated. Ayame sighed, and slapped her forehead.

Meanwhile…

'Hmm, so this is Naruto-kun's apartment' Naruko thought to herself as she observed the mess Naruto called a 'home'. Instant ramen cups and clothes were scattered about on the floor, a shamisen leaned up against the wall and a few scrolls were littered across the small table in front of his sofa. It was messy, yet it was endearing in some strange way. And on the wall was a beautiful painting of the Konoha sunrise. The image was so breathtakingly beautiful, that Naruko couldn't help but feel entranced by painstakingly detailed rendition of the beautiful morning sky.

"It's beautiful" gasped Naruko. However, she shook herself out of her stupor and decided to get on with what she came here to do: acquire clothes.

A short while later…

After making herself a cup of ramen and tossing on a baggy t-shirt and some shorts, Naruko felt much more relaxed. She decided to go find Naruto and attempt to seduce him (he was just so cute when he was flustered). But not before she had a good look round the jinchuuriki's apartment. Rooting around in his old wardrobe, looking for any incriminating evidence, she accidentally knocked one of the floorboards, and it came loose. Overcome with curiosity, she removed the loose floorboard, and gasped at the contents.

'Are these… p-porn magazines? KYAAAAAAA!' she screamed girlishly before sprinting out of his apartment into the hot summer air.

Despite the raging heat, it was a peaceful day in Konoha. However, this peace was about to be broken.

"WHAT?" Naruto shouted incredibly loudly.

"We aren't serving ramen today, Naruto." Teuchi said kindly.

"NOT SERVING RAMEN? HOW CAN THIS BE?" Naruto cried, as manly tears flowed from his eyes.

"Well, for one it's way too hot to be cooking or eating ramen. Secondly, we've ran out of ingredients because you eat so many bowls, not that I'm complaining of course. We've sent an errand boy off to get our things and by tomorrow we'll be ready to sell." Teuchi explained good-naturedly. A sob threatened to escape Naruto's mouth but he held it in and it came out as an odd sort of choking noise. "However we are serving ice cream for the day!" At this, Naruto's eyes brightened immediately.

"I'll take one, old man!" he exclaimed exuberantly.

"Coming right up, Naruto!" Teuchi said, happy to serve his favourite customer. "Oh, Naruto? Put a shirt on." He scooped the ice cream into the cone and handed it to Naruto as he inspected his body confusedly.

"Oh, I'm shirtless" he said while slamming some money down on the counter. "Keep the change" Naruto grinned, but paled when he felt a pair of arms wrap around him and hot breath in his ear.

"Hi Naruto-kun…" Naruko whispered seductively, making Naruto gulp.

"!" Naruto said quickly, however due to his franticness it sounded like "!" He ran away into the woods, still clutching his ice cream cone, being careful not to spill it, as Naruko chased after him.

"Who the heck was that?" Teuchi wondered to himself.

After (or so he thought) shaking Naruko off, he sat in a tree and began to eat his ice cream. However, as delicious as the treat was, it couldn't distract him from the figure perched on the branch opposite him. Slowly but painfully moving his head up to look at the person, he was met with a face.

"Boo." Naruko said. Naruto instantly screamed, dropped his ice cream, and fell through the tree hitting the branches and landing on his face. Not wanting the delicious frozen treat to go to waste, Naruko caught it and gracefully dropped down in front of Naruto, as he groaned and rubbed his head and sat up.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Naruto whined.

"It's because I love you" Naruko teased as she licked Naruto's ice cream. Looking at her pretty face Naruto realized something: she was beautiful, and he was REALLY lonely. She looked adorable in the oversized T-shirt with a bit of ice cream smeared around her lips. So naturally, being a young man with needs, and no girlfriend around, he lifted his head up and crashed his lips into hers, lips meeting in a passionate kiss, while wrapping his arms around her. Naruko's eyes widened in surprise for a split second, but she soon melted into his arms and returned the kiss.

'Heh, this is kinda weird. Making out with myself' Naruto mused, as he gently pushed Naruko to the ground without breaking the kiss and caressed her thigh. Naruto broke the kiss and got up, while Naruko sat up and took of Naruto's shirt, exposing her large breasts. The round, firm breasts bounced as they were exposed to the summer air and Naruto was incredibly turned on. He nibbled on Naruko's ear and trailed kisses down her chest, and he pulled of her shorts and panties, exposing her vagina. He rubbed her sensitive spot tenderly, and inserted a finger into her. Instantly she clenched around his finger, arching her back in pleasure and giving a small moan. He slowly but surely started to move his fingers around in her hot core, and her moans of ecstasy got louder. He put in another finger and started to thrust his fingers in and out of her as a blush painted her pretty face. She grabbed his fingers and pulled them out of her as she pushed Naruto onto his back.

"It's my turn to pleasure you now, Naruto-kun" she giggled as she pulled his shorts down, unearthing his erection. She stroked it for a bit, eliciting a moan of pleasure from Naruto. She then took his entire length into her mouth, running her tongue across the tip, and then bobbing her head up and down. After increasing with speed, with the only sounds in the air being the occasional rustling of a leaf and the sounds of a glorious blowjob, Naruto grabbed Naruko's head.

"N-Naruko-chan!" he cried out as he came in her mouth. Naruko lifted her head off of Naruto's member and swallowed Naruto's load.

"N-Naruto-kun… Please…" Naruko panted desperately. Naruto simply nodded and pushed her onto her back, and positioned his throbbing erection at her entrance. Looking into her eyes for confirmation, she merely nodded and bit her lip. Naruto braced himself and slid into her, the intense feeling of pleasure causing Naruto to gasp slightly and Naruko to whimper. Gathering himself together, Naruto slid out and thrust in again, causing Naruko's eyes to widen in surprise and pleasure at the forcefulness of Naruto's thrusts.

"Please...faster..." Naruko managed to moan out through the high amounts of pleasure she was feeling, and Naruto obliged, thrusting in and out faster, her tight slick walls making him feel like he had never felt before. Naruto let out a few grunts before pulling out, flipping Naruko onto her front and swiftly re-entering her. Naruko was not prepared for this, and let out a cry of surprise when Naruto thrust into her again. Their lovemaking session continued for 5 minutes, with the only sounds being that of the panting of the two blondes and the sound of flesh meeting flesh in a passionate frenzy. Naruto could feel the familiar ache he had felt numerous times before, yet never as amplified and intense as this. Thrusting a few more times, he pulled out and Naruko turned around and started stroking his length, as he ejaculated onto her face and her, erm, "ample bosom".

"N-Naruko!" he cried out as the semen shot from his penis onto his lover's breasts and face. Naruko used her hand to clean his seed from her breasts and face into her mouth, then swallowing it. As Naruto pulled on his pants Naruko followed suit, and when Naruto lay down and beckoned her towards him she gladly went and lay down in his arms.

"Well, that went well" Naruto said contently, before adding "I suppose" as an afterthought. "Thank you, Naruko-chan, I needed that" he said gratefully and looked to her to find that she as fast asleep. Chuckling to himself, he kissed her on the forehead and shut his eyes, falling into a deep slumber with a beautiful vixen in his arms.

The ice cream cone lay forgotten on the side, its contents spilling out onto the soft grass of the forest.

Author's Notes: Well, it wasn't my first fic, but having grown up a lot I think this turned out well. This isn't a pairing I'd ever consider, it was requested (in a weird way.) It was originally gonna be male narutoxmale Naruto, but that didn't really work out with the theme of the thing (Ice Cream), so I scratched that for NarutoxNaruko, and I am pleased with the end result.

Are you happy now, Sugarsnike, you pervert you? ;_;