Where's my Family?

Spike Centric One-shot

A/N: My first ever written One-shot. Originally posted on my DA i felt it should be posted here too!

Spike hadn't been himself recently, to say the least. To say he couldn't hide it however would be false. The anguish he has had been piling up and threatened breaking him. To the outside viewer he would seem like himself, helping Twilight with studying and lusting after Rarity like he usually does, but inside he was hurting.

Everyday back when he lived in Canterlot he saw many Pony families around the city and sees how they act and the love they share. At first it didn't bother him, but a burning question kept reappearing in his mind. Where was his family? He had begun to feel worse and worse the more he saw. When he and Twilight moved to Ponyville his feelings never went away. In fact it got worse. The entire town acted like one big family, even the Cakes treat Pinkie like their daughter.

Where did he fit into that. He was more like a slave dragon than a family member, people just seemed to tolerate him so he'd do things for them. Even Twilight, he couldn't remember anytime when he was praised for his work. He's just her assistant nothing more nothing less.

The Grand Galloping Gala was the final straw. They just seemed to ignore him and even in the end they only were with him because they were together; they probably didn't even care he was there. They probably only found him because they wanted to leave. He had to persuade them to stay even, its like they didn't care about him.

Spike's P.O.V

"Spike!" Twilight called to me while I was sorting the books for the 10th time that week. "We're out of food, go get some from the store!"

"Why can't you?" I yell back placing another book on the shelf. "I'm cleaning up after YOUR mess." I yell back in my usual bad mood I've been in since the gala.

"Spike, I'm busy studying I can't leave!" she said in defense

"Oh what do you have to study? You've read like every book in this library like 80 times!" I say back extremely agitated. "Oh but of course you don't care about me! I'm just your little slave dragon!" I say headed for the door.

"S-Spike i-it's not like that" she said running to the room.

"Shut up already I'm going," I say forcing open the door. "It's not like you care about me to begin with!"

At the Ponyville market.

"Where's my family?" I say to myself in sadness. Everyone has a family, the fillys at the school come home to loving parents everyday. They're supportive and loving and always interested in what their kids have to say.

Sure Apple Bloom doesn't have parents, but at least she has Applejack and Big Mac and even Granny Smith. Sweetie Belle has Rarity to take care of her. I'm sure even Scootaloo has a loving family even though I've never met them. What do I have, a naggy purple unicorn that treats like her servent. They all have families why don't I?

I had an idea instantly. I needed paper, I ran over to the stationary store. I needed to write a letter. Only one person would possibly know my parents, someone who had my egg. The person who originally received my egg, Princess Celestia.

Dear Princess Celestia,

This is Spike, sorry about the sudden letter but theres something that's been eating me. I know you probably don't care about my personal matters but I need to ask you something. Of all the Ponies in Equestria you're the only one who can answer this. Who were my parents? Are they still around? Can I see them? Do they even want me anymore? Do I even have a family? I know I sound hysterical because I really am. I feel unappreciated like nopony even wants me around. I feel like nopony would care if I ended my life or left forever. I feel so insignificant I don't know what to do. I know I sound whiny but I feel like I need someone to know what I'm feeling right now. You always seemed like you cared so you're the only pony I can go to.

Dangerously losing his mind,

Spike

With a small burst of flame it was sent off. I hadn't picked up the groceries nor did I even want to go back to the library. So I wandered in a daze. I don't even know where I was going nor did I care. As I walked I passed a restaurant and saw a mother comforting a crying baby. I passed a father and son playing catch in the park. I saw families, the kind I'd lacked.

"They all have normal childhoods, something I never had the luxary of experiencing." I say sitting below a tree in front of the Everfree forest. My joints hurt from all the walking I did. I was probably hitting one of the many growth spurts I'd go through. Signaling the end of the childhood I never had.

I thought I could find solace in the Everfree forest alone in the depths of the forest. Nothing changed. I see animal colonies and families. In a way they were closer than the pony families. Some parents attacked me to protect their kids. Birds teaching their chicks to fly. Bears teaching their kids to hunt. I don't have parents to teach me things or protect me.

I made it to the base of the mountain that Canterlot was built on. Before I felt the typical indigestion feeling I get when I'm about to receive a message and sure enough. I got a reply from the princess.

Dear Spike,

I had no idea you were hurting this bad. Back in Canterlot after the Grand Galloping Gala. I could tell something was wrong, you lacked your usual spunk I know you for. I'm glad you let me know before you did something you'd regret.

As for your parents though, I'm afraid I need to tell you a story. Back before your egg was even laid. I knew this dragon couple that lived where Canterlot is now. When I moved the royal castle to where it is now. I made sure they would still be able to live there. Im sure you noticed that the castle has rathe high ceilings, well they're the reason. I kept them hidden from the royal guards though for safety reasons. The guards will kill anything they think is even a remote threat. However, the guards found out about them, they were told by the construction ponies who found them when we were building out. Dragons are seen as volatile and dangerous creatures so the Royal Guards issued their death. In her dying breath the mother handed my an egg, same purple color as her own. And told me to find her son a home. The egg was placed in incubation, but there was a problem. The egg lacked its mother, it wouldn't hatch now unless aided by someone of incredibly gifted magic.

I knew that my dear sister was coming back soon and that I need the elements of harmony to bring her back. So I used the egg as an "entrance exam" Anyone who failed would still be admitted to my school, but I knew only the holder of the element of magic could hatch it. That's when my faithful student Twilight Sparkle hatched you from that very egg.

I'm sorry you had to find out this way Spike. Please know that I meant to tell you this when you were older and could handle it better, but I cannot lie to one of my subjects. If it makes you feel better I think of you as a dear friend, more than one of my subjects. If you feel up to it, since I know you are somewhere in the Everfree forest now, come to the palace in Canterlot and stay here until your ready to head home. However I do feel that you should

The letter cut off there, however I received no more messages from the Princess. "She sounded like she cared, maybe I should go to the palace." I said out loud.

"You," I heard a voice boom behind me. "I remember you, young dragon who intruded on my lair." I turn around and see the same green dragon that tried to kill me the first time I ran away from Ponyville. "Come back to die have you!" he said droping his head to my eye level.

I was basically handed a free death sentence. "Go ahead," I said holding my arms out at my sides. "I don't care do as you please its not like anyone would miss me."

"You're not going to run? Young dragon what has happened to you? When you invaded my lair you were full of defiant spunk, you lack that now. As annoying as I think you are, you are a fellow dragon. Who has wronged you so badly?" he said with concern in his booming voice.

"Who hasn't," I say with venom in my words. "I spent my entire life as a slave dragon to an overdemanding and frankly uncaring unicorn who basically keeps me around because I'm free labor. I was stripped of a childhood AND going through severe growing pains. No one seems to care about me and only seems to like me when I'm doing mundane tasks for them. AND to top it all off I just found out that my parents were killed by Celestia's Royal Guards before I was even hatched leaving me an uncared for orphan used only for free dragon labor. I have nothing to live for." I confess holding back tears.

"Young dragon, you have suffered much for one you age. I apologize for my past actions for I know that you know no better. Scorch and Fiana were good friends of mine and I didn't know they had a child." He layed down his hand in front of me. "If you are heading somewhere I can take you there, no problem. It's the least I can do for the son of my late close friends."

"Canterlot." I say jumping into his hand. "I have business with the Princess." He nodded his large head as he flew me to the outskirts of Canterlot.

Canterlot Royal Castle:

I walk up to the guards in front of the castle. "Pardon me. My name is Spike, official scribe for the royal court. Princess Celestia should be expecting me to come." The 2 guards looked at each other before one walked into the room they were standing in front of.

"You may enter." One of the guards said when he came back out.

I walked into the room to see Celestia sitting on her usual throne. "Spike, I didn't expect you here so soon." She said in a delighted tone. "I trust your read my letter."

"Yes I did," I said quietly not mentioning that it cut off.

"Feel free to stay in the castle as long as you want Spike. It's the least I can do." She said in a loving tone.

"You don't have to do anything." I say approaching her throne. "Its not like I have a family to go back to," I say with tears entering my eyes.

"Spike a family isn't just a Mother Father and Children." She said pulling me into an embrace. "Sometimes family is just people who care about you more than anything." She let go of the embrace and I backed off, a little intimidated.

"Well I don't have that either." I mumble looking out the window.

A warm smile appeared on Celestia's face. "Theres a spare room upstairs next to my own. Im sure you can find it on your own. I have to help start the night." She said pointing to the stairwell behind her before walking off.

A week later:

This week hadn't done much for my mood. In fact it made it worse. Everyday I was used for scribing duties in the royal court. It seemed like Celestia only wanted me here to scribe for her. Everyday I see families plead to the court. Parents ready to give up everything for their childs safety and as time went on, I felt worse than I did before.

I left Canterlot immediately and desended the mountain. I thought about going to see that green dragon again, but soon realized that he only cared about me because he knew my late parents. So I decided against that.

"I may as well let Twilight know I'm not dead." I wanted to give her a piece of my mind. I was angry with her, livid even. I thought she cared about me, but she obviously sent no one to search for me. Or even cared about me enough to contact the Princess. I stormed through the forest stomping out a few burrows and nests along the way. I really didn't care. I swatted at the birds and stepped on the critters that tried to attack me. How dare they have what I couldn't.

I burned trees and sent fire through burrows, burning whetever lived there. How dare they have a family. I even clawed apart a mother squirrel that attacked me. Maybe the kids will learn my anguish. Angering a mother bear I dodged her swipes and clung to her back. Sending fire into the gashes my claws made burning her from the inside out. The anguished cries from the babies only fuel the adrenaline coursing through my system.

'Kill them all Spike. Break apart what you don't have.' A sinister voice said in my head. 'They don't deserve happiness if you're forced to suffer.'

I let loose a sinister laugh, my last bits of sanity leaving me. I now ran through the forest on a rampage. Nothing escaped my flame as any parental creature I found was burned to death before me. "Now now little ones," I say psychotically to 2 bear cubs. "Your mommy is sleeping. Too bad she'll never wake up. She's busy burning," my voice twisting in my craze. The biggest one charged at me, but was diverged and swatted away with ease. "Now now little one, that's a no no." I say walking away. "I'll spare your lives, because I'm such a nice dragon." I ran off into the forest away from the gruesome scene. Its like I couldn't control my own body. Rather the voice in my head was controlling me, forcing me to do these terrible things. While I sit back and watch.

"NO! I won't hurt anymore innocent creatures." I yelled finally able to control my body.

'But Spike, they have what you don't, they deserve to suffer!' the voice yelled in my mind.

I grab my head in pain as I yell back angrily. "NO ONE deverves to go through what I am. Your awful for making me do this!"

'But Spike I made you do nothing,' the voice defended. 'look at the animals, look at how they cower in fear at you.' The voice paused to laugh maniacally 'your nothing but a monster!'

"I'm NOT A MONSTER!" I yell as I clutch my head harder and run. I run and find myself at the Ponyville Library. "This is your fault," I mumble to myself as I stumble toward the door. "YOU made me like this Twilight, now you will pay." I mumble insanely as I open the door and stand in the doorway, staring at said unicorn.

"SPIKE!" she said as she looked in my direction. "There you are I was so worried!" she said in a relieved tone

'worried?'

"where'd you so Spike? I thought something bad had happened, we've been looking for you everywhere."

'l-looking for me?'

"You mean SO much to us, you mean SO much to me!" she said slowly walking toward me. "I couldn't stand the thought of losing you."

'couldn't stand losing me?'

"I had planned a party to celebrate you 13th birthday but you never came back, I needed you to leave to set it up."

'p-party for me?'

"I was going to call the Princess to see if she knew where you were, I was so desperate, I'm just glad your safe Spike." She said sighing while talking

'desperate, glad I'm safe?'

Tear fill my eyes as I run toward Twilight crying loudly. She's stunned at first but pulls me into a loving embrace. "Shh… its ok Spike. Just let it out," she said im a motherly tone. "When I heard the commotion in the forest I assumed the worst. I love you so much Spike, I couldn't imagine what I'd do without you."

"I'm so sorry Twilight, don't hate me," I say through tears.

She pulled me into a tighter embrace and rocked me a little before speaking. "I could never hate you Spike. What happened, happened." She pulled back and wiped the tears out of my eyes. "I'm sure you're tired, why don't we talk in the morning ok?" I wiped the tears from my eyes and nodded, giving a sort of half smile. She picked me up onto her back and carried me to bed. Still there like nothing happened. "You need anything Spike?" she said after she laid me in bed. I shook my head meekly. "Ok, ill be at my desk if you need anything. Goodnight Spike," she said in a motherly tone.

'Goodnight, Mom' I thought to myself before passing out. I guess Celestia was right. Family isn't just about Mom and Dad, family can be anywhere you are cared for, and parents are your caregivers.

"I love you Spike."

"I love you too Twilight."

A/N: Yep, Spike just went insane. I kinda vented my stress and anger into this... yea...