Disclaimer-I don't own Glee
If you don't like Glee, then you are clearly in the wrong place and I advise you to go and read something you DO like.
If homosexual/lesbian relationships bother you, then somebody should throw rocks at you, please kindly fuck off and hide your homophobic head in shame.
If heterosexual relationships bother you, grow up and don't be such a… um… heterophobe?
I would also like to point out that this is listed as romance and Puck and Kurt are selected as the 2 main characters. That is because Puck and Kurt will eventually have a relationship of a romantic kind. If you don't like the thought of those two characters as a romantic/sexual couple, not only are you very weird for not seeing the wonder that is PucKurt, but you're in the wrong place so please leave without comment.
Readers who do like Glee and PucKurt slash, please read on, hope you enjoy.
Write Me Happy
Summary: Depression can be so charming as it lures you away from happiness. Before you know it, you've turned your back on merriments embrace and fallen into the clutches of misery. Perhaps Miss Pillsbury's new anonymous pen-pal idea could be helpful, or will it only cause trouble and heartache?
Definite eventual pairings – Puck/Kurt, Brittany/Santana, Sam/Mercedes, Tina/Mike, but other pairings are possible.
Chapter 1-Written in Pink
The assembled students just stared at Miss Pillsbury, every one of them wearing a 'what the fuck?' expression. Stood before them all in the gym, the red-haired Guidance Counsellor was still smiling excitedly, her big brown eyes seeking out Mr. Schue who smiled encouragingly at her.
"Now, this new pen-pal exercise is not compulsory," she told them and most of the students let out a collective sigh of relief. "However," Miss Pillsbury continued not letting their lack of enthusiasm deter her. "I strongly recommend that you all take part. Just give it a chance, it might surprise you. Anyone who does decide to participate will be allocated a pen-pal. You will not know the identity of the person you are corresponding with and they will not know yours. Nobody is permitted to reveal who they are. This anonymity will allow you the opportunity to open up and be yourself to somebody else who won't be judging you because they will be opening up too. This is a chance to forget about labels and peer-pressure and really connect with someone you may not even speak to under ordinary circumstances."
"Lame!" Coach Sylvester yelled from somewhere near the back. Closing her eyes momentarily, Miss Pillsbury picked up where she had left off. "Pipe down ginger pubes!" Coach Sylvester yelled out.
"Sue." Mr. Schue admonished shaking his head at her in disapproval. Noticing that Miss Pillsbury had lost her confidence a little, the Spanish teacher stood up and joined her. "This pen-pal scheme will start first thing tomorrow. So anybody who would like to sign up, just submit your names to Miss Pillsbury and a pen-pal will be randomly selected for you."
"Yes, random selection." Miss Pillsbury nodded. "Very exciting. Your pen-pals will be chosen by fate. Also, I will ask half of you to write the first letter and I will ensure that letter reaches your chosen pen-pal so that he or she can then reply."
"Right, and this is for a month guys." Mr. Schue added. "After that, it's entirely up to you what happens. If you would like to reveal your identity to your mystery pen-pal then you are welcome to. Or if you want to continue writing to one another anonymously then that is acceptable too."
There was a very scattered round of applause before Principal Figgins reclaimed the microphone stand. He droned on for ten minutes without anybody listening to him before dismissing them all so they could return to their lessons.
"Ok, what the hell is with this pen-pal idea?" Santana asked as she sashayed down the hall with Brittany. "Pen-pals are for girl scouts, not High School students."
"I think it'll be fun." Brittany smiled. "I'm going to sign up for it."
"Sweetie, no, that is just not cool." Santana told her.
"Who cares about being cool?" Brittany asked. "It's an anonymous programme. Besides, I'm totally hot so I should be allowed to do what I want."
"I'll tell you what," Santana said trying to make a compromise. "If you don't do this pen-pal thing I will totally agree to a threesome with you and Professor X."
"Don't call Artie that, it's mean." Brittany replied. "And I want to do this, so as my best friend you should be supportive."
A little way behind the two girls, Rachel was latched onto Finn's arm insisting that they both had to take part in Miss Pillsbury's pen-pal scheme.
"But I'm not really so good with writing letters." Finn tried to say but quickly agreed to sign up when Rachel scowled at him. "Dude, you gotta do this thing too," he pleaded to Sam who was walking along with them hand-in-hand with Quinn, the blonde girl avoiding eye-contact with Finn at all costs even as the lanky teen gazed right at her, though thankfully their significant others were oblivious. "I can't be the only guy doing this thing."
"I don't know man," Sam replied. "I'm dyslexic."
"You shouldn't let that stop you." Rachel told him. "In fact, I shall encourage everyone in Glee Club to take part. You'll do it won't you Quinn?" She asked.
"Will you stop talking to me and vote for me to win Prom Queen if I agree?" Quinn questioned her and Rachel looked slightly offended but nodded. "Then fine, Sam and I will do it."
"We will?" Sam asked and Quinn shot him a glare. "I mean, we will." He nodded before nearly stumbling over his own feet as Quinn dragged him along behind her so she could get them away from Rachel.
"Mike, Tina." Rachel called before leaving Finn so she could pester the Asian couple into joining the pen-pal programme.
"What do you think about it Kurt?" Mercedes asked as she walked down the corridor arm-in-arm with her best friend.
"I think it's a ridiculous idea." Kurt responded. "In all honesty I fail to see what it is Miss Pillsbury hopes to achieve. Communication through the written word is virtually meaningless in today's culture. We have text messaging and facebook, letter-writing is all but dead. Besides, the likeliness of anything positive coming from this pen-pal exercise is very slim. Having the freedom to express one's self is a beautiful thing 'Cedes, but in this situation it can only lead to disaster. Just imagine if I was unfortunate enough to land some Neanderthal as a pen-pal. As soon as the month is up and I revealed my identity they'd beat me up and re-tell anything I told them to the rest of the school."
"It won't be like that," Mercedes said. "I'm pretty sure the Meat-Heads at this school don't even know how to spell their own names let alone write a meaningful letter, there's no way they'd take part. And you're not obliged to reveal who you are to your pen-pal when the month is over. Who knows, it might be fun. I'm definitely giving it a go."
"You're just hoping to come across some juicy gossip." Kurt stated knowingly and she smiled guiltily. "Enjoy what gossip you may discover Mercedes, but I am not taking part. Mark my words, this pen-pal scheme won't result in blossoming friendships or true love. This is real life, not a book or a movie."
"You never know, some of the movie stuff could happen." Mercedes shrugged. "Where else would movie writers get their ideas? You never know, maybe there are some people at this school struggling with their sexuality. Perhaps you could be the one to help them emerge fabulously from the closet."
"I doubt there are any gay guys at this school," Kurt replied. "At least not any that I would even consider as a dating possibility. Even if there was, the chances of me getting them as my pen-pal are not very high. With my luck I'd get Rachel, Jacob Ben-Israel or homeless-smelling Brett as my pen-pal."
"Just try it, please, for me." Mercedes begged. "I'll buy you that hat I saw you eyeing up at the mall."
"I… I…" Kurt stuttered trying to resist the temptation of the fashion accessory.
"You know it would look so cute on you." Mercedes encouraged.
"Very well." Kurt sighed. "But if this thing bites me in the ass then I am holding you personally responsible Miss Jones."
XXX
That lunch time, Brittany was the first to sign her name for Miss Pillsbury's pen-pal scheme. An eager Rachel signed her name with a gold star immediately after. She then watched on to ensure that Finn signed his. After him, Sam and Quinn added their names as did Mike and Tina. Being the good boyfriend he was, Artie agreed to sign up because Brittany asked him to. He couldn't reach the sign-up sheet himself so Puck did it for him. He hesitated a while before adding his name too. After they had moved away, Mercedes signed her name and Kurt let out a string of complaints as he signed his own. It was only when the corridor was empty that Santana hastily scribbled her name onto the sheet. A few members of the AV club added their names, along with the Jazz band. Coach Beiste ordered the entire football team to sign up for the pen-pal scheme and a handful of other students ended up adding their names to the list. Coach Sylvester then came along to add her share of silly made-up names such as 'Ben Dover', 'Paul Hiscock' and 'Dick Rash'.
XXX
"Hey Emma," Mr. Schue greeted as he knocked on the door of the redhead's office before stepping aside. "How did your pen-pal plan take off?"
"It's actually received a very good response." She smiled obviously pleased. "Better than I could have hoped for with the lack of enthusiasm the idea received in the assembly hall. There are actually forty-one names in total, without Sue's childish additions that is."
"Forty-one?" Will asked in surprise. "Wow, that's amazing."
"Yes, amazing," Emma agreed. "But the odd number does pose a small problem though. I had hoped an even number of students would sign up. Maybe I could persuade just one more student to join the programme."
"What about my Glee kids?" Will questioned. "I'm sure I could talk to them and get them to join. It'll be good for them."
"Actually Will, every member of New Directions did sign up. The Jazz Band too." Emma informed him.
"Really, even Puck and Santana?" Will asked and Emma nodded. "I must admit I'm impressed. I didn't expect either of those two to go anywhere near that list."
"Children can always surprise you if given the opportunity." Emma told him. "They must be feeling lost and alone." She said sadly. "Most teenagers do. That's why I proposed this idea to Figgins in the first place. It gives the chance for these kids to talk about their issues with their peers in a secure way without fear of judgement or ridicule. The possibilities of what could happen after this are endless."
"You really are something else Emma." Will said gazing at her fondly and she blushed a little as she tucked her hair behind her ears before rearranging her already neatly organized desk. "Maybe I could become number forty-two." He suggested.
"That's sweet of you to offer Will, but I'm not sure it's entirely appropriate." Emma pointed out. "You're a teacher. Talking to a student in such an intimate manner without their knowledge is a little indecent. What would the parents think? Or the child if they were to find out they were spilling their hearts out to you? It could even risk the creation of another Suzy Pepper-like crush."
"You're right," Will admitted with a nod. "It's a shame though. I'm sure I could have really helped a student out. These kids all need someone willing to listen to them, someone they can trust and turn to for help with anything life throws at them."
"Is this really about the kids?" Emma asked him searching his face for the answers. "Or do you feel you need somebody to talk to?"
"If I'm honest," Will sighed. "I think I do feel as lonely and miserable as some of these kids. When I was with Terri, I always had someone to talk to when I got home in the evening, or at least someone to argue with. I don't have that now. It'd be nice to talk to someone anonymously for a while, even if it's a student and even if it's just for a month."
"I'm sorry you're unhappy Will." Emma replied. "Really, I am. But I can't allow you to become a pen-pal to a student. You can always talk to me though. We are still friends right?"
"Are we?" Will asked. "Ever since you've been dating Carl you and I don't really spend much time together."
The Guidance Counsellor lowered her eyes unsure as to how to respond.
"I'll find a student to become number forty-two," Will said. "I promise."
"Thank you." Emma mouthed as she watched the Spanish teacher leave.
True to his word, Will convinced a girl from one of his Spanish classes to join the pen-pal programme thereby making the total an even forty-two. Those forty-two students would be paired up at random to make twenty-one different duos who would write to one another anonymously for a month.
XXX
That evening at home, Emma wrote out the forty-two student names on a slip of paper each. She then put all the perfectly cut slips of paper into a bowl and shook them around. Pulling out two slips at a time, she matched the students up into pairs. She highlighted one of the names out of each couple indicating that the highlighted student would be the one to write the first letter. Seeing some of the pairings that had been formed, Emma felt a little uncertain about the idea for the first time since she had thought of it.
"Oh I hope this turns out to be a good thing." She said to herself touching the wooden table for luck.
XXX
The next school day, notes were sent discreetly to the students who were to write the first letter to their unknown pen-pal. Before the end of the day, Emma was pleased to find that all twenty-one students had already written and enveloped a first letter. The paper and envelopes had been delivered along with the notes telling the students they were to write the first letter. Each envelope had a letter of the alphabet on it so she would know which student had written which letter and who the pen-pal was. She had written all the information down in a book so that she could keep track of who was writing to whom.
During the final period of the day, Emma ensured that the first letters reached the necessary people. She also left a note urging the students to place their response letters in the same envelope so she could tell which pairing it belonged to by the alphabet letter. If the students really wanted to, they could probably find out who they were corresponding with. She just hoped the students taking part would accept the anonymity rather than try to discover the identities of who they were writing to. With some of the pairings that had been made, Emma was sure fights would break out if they learned who they were talking with before the month was over. Once again, she worried that the pen-pal scheme might turn sour but for now all she could do was wait it out and hope it ran smoothly.
XXX
At home, Dave Karofsky took the letter from his pen-pal out of his bag. He hated the idea but he didn't want Coach Beiste to kick him off the football team. Removing the letter from the envelope, he discovered that his new pen-pal had written to him in pink. The handwriting was very neat and girly. He couldn't help but hope that maybe it was Hummel. He'd never seen the other boy's writing but he was sure it must be fancy and it was highly probably that he'd write in pink ink. Kicking an empty pizza box out of his way with his foot, he moved to his bed and slumped down to read the letter.
Hey Mystery Pen-Pal,
I instantly loved Miss Pillsbury's idea and I'm excited for it. But now that it's started I don't actually know what to say. I guess I should tell you about myself but that might give away who I am. Hopefully you're one of those jock guys too dumb to guess.
Dave perked up a bit. Hummel was always insulting the jocks for their intelligence. It would also be easy to give his identity away. All he'd have to say was fashionable male-diva or school queer and anybody could guess who he was.
I used to be a Cheerio and I love to sing and dance.
Reading that piece of information increased Dave's hopes that it was Hummel's writing before him.
People can be mean to me sometimes and it's quite upsetting. They don't always say things to my face, usually it's behind my back but I know it's me they're laughing at. I try not to let it show how much it affects me but it isn't always easy. People make fun of my friends too. I don't know why they pick on us so much. They must be jealous because we're all so much better than they are.
A feeling of guilt stabbed at Dave's gut but a smile formed on his face. That paragraph definitely sounded like Hummel talking about the bullying. It was also just like Hummel to think of himself as being better than everybody else.
By the way, did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?
Dave laughed out loud feeling certain that Kurt Hummel was his pen-pal. He eagerly found himself a plain sheet of paper and reached for a pen so he could reply.
XXX
Opening the letter from her new pen-pal, Quinn instantly realised who the letter was from. The poor spelling and Avatar doodles at the bottom made it obvious that it was her boyfriend. There was nothing at all revealing in Sam's letter. He had commented on being bored in his Geography class and mentioned the weather. The letter finished with him saying he would be happy to listen and offer any advice he could if he or she needed someone to talk to.
Twirling a pen between her fingers, Quinn wondered if she should simply tell Sam it was her or not. In the end, she decided to take this as an opportunity to find out more about her boyfriend and how he felt about her. There were some things he was reluctant to discuss with her because she was his girlfriend. It was possible that she could learn more about him as his pen-pal than she ever could as his girlfriend.
Poising her pen over the paper, she deliberately made her writing messier than normal so that he wouldn't recognise it and guess it was her.
Hey, I'm not sure what to call you. Quinn began before taking a few moments to think over what pseudo name she could create for Sam to call her. But while we communicate this way for the next month you can call me Faith. She settled for such a name as her faith in religion had helped her through the struggles she had faced last year. She didn't think it too obvious a name and if Sam questioned it in his next letter she could always claim to be a fan of the Faith Lehane character from the old Buffy the Vampire Slayer T.V series.
You said you were willing to listen, or more accurately read. Thank you for the offer. It's very sweet of you. It doesn't really feel like many people are willing to listen to me. Sometimes it feels as though I'm screaming but nobody's paying attention. People look at me and probably assume I have things easy, but I don't. My life is full of difficulties. Recently, I've been having relationship troubles.
She looked down at the words she was writing pondering over how much she should or shouldn't say. It was true that she was having relationship troubles. After the big football game the week before and after being kicked off the Cheerio's, Quinn had shared a kiss with her former boyfriend Finn. She felt guilty about it. Cheating was not something she approved of and now she had done it twice. The year before, she had cheated on Finn with Puck and now she had kissed Finn even though she was with Sam.
For some reason I just can't seem to make relationships work. Are you in a relationship at all? She asked through the written word even though she already knew the answer. If you are, perhaps you could tell me a little about it. Maybe you could help me to see where I'm going wrong with mine. Anything you could tell me would be helpful and I'd greatly appreciate it.
From Faith.
She re-read the letter before folding it carefully and slipping it back into the envelope.
XXX
At home, Kurt was sitting comfortably on the sofa flipping through a magazine. Every so often he'd hear a small bout of laughter from his step-brother who was reading his letter from his pen-pal. As soon as Finn had read his letter, he got to work on writing one back.
"You know, I really thought this letter thing was dumb." Finn commented. "But I'm sorta glad Rachel made me do it. This dude or chick is really funny."
"Whatever." Kurt replied.
"What about your pen-pal?" Finn asked.
"I haven't read it yet." Kurt shrugged thinking of the envelope that was still in his messenger bag. "In all honesty I'm not that enthusiastic about this pen-pal thing. Mercedes bribed me with a hat to take part. I doubt my pen-pal has anything remotely interesting to say anyway."
"You don't know until you read it." Finn pointed out.
It was half eleven at night when Kurt finally felt curious enough to open the letter. He expected to read a quick paragraph about something meaningless but was shocked to find himself reading something much more meaningful. His mystery pen-pal hadn't exactly bared his soul out, but the content was still rather deep for a first letter to a mystery reader. Scanning his eyes over the letter, Kurt found himself far more immersed than he expected to be.
Dear Reader,
I've never really been good with words but I'll try anyway. To be truthful, I'm kinda lonely so talking to you might be nice or whatever. Or maybe it'll be totally lame. I guess that really depends on you. I'm not entirely sure why I signed up for this thing. It was a spur of the moment decision. I'm really just looking for somebody to talk to. There isn't anyone in my life for me to really talk to right now. I don't think there's ever been anyone I can truly be myself around. Now let's be clear, I'm not looking for pity or anything. I just want someone to get a little insight as to who I really am. I guess that someone could be you whoever you are.
People make a lot of assumptions about me. Maybe they're right about the things they say. But maybe they're wrong. Ever since I was a kid I've had people talk about me, all of them saying I was gonna turn out a certain way. At times I wanna prove them wrong. Other times I just don't care. The rest of the time I'm not even sure what to feel.
My life isn't exactly great but it's not terrible either. But it could be better you know. I just feel like there's something more, something just out of reach. Inside, I feel kinda empty. I'm not happy. I haven't really been happy for a while, not properly anyway. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not slitting my wrists or planning to top myself or anything. I'm just not as happy as I could be. Depression is probably too strong a word, but depression is a more fitting word than happiness right now.
Sometimes I just feel completely alone. It feels like nobody cares about me. I'm not asking or expecting you to suddenly be my best friend and care about me. I just hope you'll be decent enough to read what I have to say and write back. I want someone to know the real me, even if you don't like who the real me is.
The letter stopped there and Kurt instantly re-read it, feeling more connected to the person than he did on the first read through. He wasn't entirely positive, but he got the impression that his pen-pal was a boy. As to whom that boy was, he had no idea. He felt compelled to write back, to open up to this person and get to know him or her better in the process. Still a little hesitant, he took up a pink pen and made a conscious effort to give the impression that he was a girl rather than a teenage boy. He rewrote his reply letter five times before he was happy with it. He then re-read the letter from his pen-pal once more before settling down to sleep.
So… worth continuing?
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Love and Hugs, IceQueenRia xxx