As I lie here in our spot in the woods, just outside of District 12, for the first time in years I don't feel so alone. Maybe it's because I know Gale's here in the woods with me, or maybe because I've paid my debts off. But there are still a few things I have to do. One: Find a final resting place for Gale's bow. Two: Open the letter.

That's right. I climbed up into that tree and there it was after all these years, protected from the summer rain and winter snow by moss and spider webs and leaves, it's still there. That envelope that I didn't know what was inside. I don't know how long I've been out here. I got off of the train and walked here in the dark of the night. It's been six hours. Or seven. Maybe eight?

I look down at the weathered envelope in my lap. I trace my fingers around the edges and then trace around Gale's bow. I inhale the cool air and close my eyes.

I'm sitting on the train, coming home from the Hunger Games. My thoughts are unbearable. The closer we get to Twelve the more lost I feel. I don't know how I'll be able to stand it. My homecoming. Will Gale be there waiting? Is he mad? How will I explain this all? Does he have a girlfriend and moved on? Do I care?

The train has stopped. We're in District 12's station. Just beyond the doors, the cameras and people from my home await for their two victors. For the starcrossed lovers of District 12.

Peeta appears and offers his hand, a sad look in his eyes. "One more time? For the audience?"

I blink, out of words. Too scared to breathe for I may fall apart. So I take his hand and the doors open.

We're engulfed my cameras and people, and the crowds are so loud that it feels silent. I'm looking around the platform, sweating, as I see my mother and Prim. When Prim jumps into my arms, I almost lose my balance from being disorientated by my thoughts.

Then a reporter says. "There you are Miss Everdeen! Your family and cousins have been waiting!"

Cousins? What cousins? I look at my mother puzzled, but the people clear out, and there's Hazelle, Rory, Vick, Posy… and Gale.

"It's time…" I whisper to myself. I flip the letter over to the back and use my nail to cut at the flap when I stop. Something's not right. Gale should be here. Suddenly I feel lost, like he's gone again. I start sweating and I grip the bow so tight that my knuckles are white. When I look up, it's no enemy, animal, or friend. It isn't Gale. It's Rina.

She's staring at me, her eyes red and wet. Her hair's back in a ponytail and she's wrapped in my father's jacket. She doesn't have any gear with her. She doesn't have any weapons. She's just here, appearing silently out of nowhere. We just look at each other, and I think we're both walking to one another because before I know it, we are standing face to face.

"I had a dream. I had to come. I saw you," Rina says quietly.

I look at her and our arms fly around each other. "I missed you so much," I say.

"When did you get it?" she chokes out.

"Last night."

"You didn't come home?"

I simple shake my head. "My task wasn't finished."

She stares at me dumbfounded. I clear my throat and blink, as she wipes her tears on her jacket sleeve. She's now eyeing the unfamiliar bow and the half opened envelope in my hands. "What are those?" she asks. "Do they belong… to him?" Peeta must have told her.

There's nothing to lie about. So I say, "Yes." Rina is silent, and the look of betrayal is on her face. I think she's about to turn and run home when I grab her shoulder, my hand sliding down her arm and I lock hands with her. "Can I show you something?"

For some reason, she agrees. Silently without words, but I string the bow to my back and stuff the envelope in my boot and lead her deeper into the woods. She's unfamiliar with these parts and thinks I'm crazy, so she's hesitating, but I push her forward. The trail has overgrown a bit, but I know these woods like the back of my hands. Every rock, every tree, every bush, and every stream. It's maybe a forty-five minute walk as I drag Rina behind me, her footing very silent so it's like holding a ghost, but we reach the lake. As she pushes away a few branches and stands next to me, I think she loses her breath in awe.

It's still as beautiful as I remember it. And it's still as painful. I see my father and a young version of me, harvesting katniss, the root I was named for. I see Bonnie and Twill, in their Peacekeeper disguises. I see Gale, standing with me. And I imagine the smoke in the air from the exploded and annihilated District 12. "I've never shown this to anybody else, but him." I turn and look at my daughter, who's looking at the ground. I sigh and lead her to the old abandoned lake house. I kick the door open and walk into the empty room. I take a minute to light a fire in the hearth and let Rina settle on the floor. I sit down by her and take the bow, setting it in front of us.

"Was this his?" she asks, rubbing the wood. I nod. She is quiet for a bit but then says, "It's so beautiful."

It really is, very well crafted and sturdy. But it's also deadly. Yet this bow kept mine and Gale's family alive for years. I stick my hand into my boot and pry the envelope out. "I've had this letter for fifteen years now. It was given to me by him. I've never read it." Rina looks at me, puzzled. I bite my gums and hand it to her. "Will you stay while I read it aloud?"

This is the moment where I expect her to turn and run. I expect her to be disgusted, for hearing what this man she never knew had to say. This man whom I almost chose over her father. I wait for her to turn and leave but instead, she wraps her arms around her knees, resting her chin on the caps. She's staying.

I fumble my fingers on the flap and tear the envelope open, taking out a folded piece of paper. My shaking fingers unfold it flat and I clear my throat, unprepared for what I was going to see.

Dear Katniss,

I don't even know where to begin. I've rewritten this letter a thousand times, but I can never find the right thing to say. Or I could never find the will to send this to you. For the longest time, I couldn't figure out why. At first I thought it was out of fear. So for a while I believed I was a coward. Maybe that was part of the reason but right now, I'll tell you what I believe. I never sent this letter to you before because… I love you Katniss.

I stop reading and I'm breathing hard. Rina's head is up, staring at me. I exchange looks with her before I go on.

I have loved you, for a very long time. I know I said I started loving you just 6 months before the Games, when we were at the Hob on that day after New Years. But I have loved you for much longer. And I always will. You're the one Katniss. I love seeing you happy. When I saw you walking in your white gown, you looked so happy. And might I add, very beautiful. You took my breath away. But I wasn't the one who you were marrying. I wasn't the one you wanted to be with forever. Even if it hurt, I couldn't let you be unhappy. That's why I let you go.

I'm in tears now, and I have to stop to breathe. I'm shaking a lot and I feel nauseas. But somehow, I manage to go on.

Leaving you was the hardest thing I have ever done. I had a choice, to stay or to go. I was going to stay, but that day when I gave you the arrow you were supposed to use for the execution, you looked like you hated me. I believed you wanted me gone. As they dragged you away when Coin died, you called my name. I lost it then. The crowd swallowed me and I felt like a lost soul. What became of me? Because I believed I had become a killer. I did become a killer. There's no changing it. But if I hurt you, please know it's not what I wanted. I love you so much.

I'm sobbing. I've fallen onto my side and my tears have made my vision foggy. I tremble and feel alone.

"Mum? Want me to finish it?" she says quietly. I give no response because I don't know if I can bear any more of it. But she takes the letter from my fingers and I listen to my daughter's voice.

I loved Prim like she was my own sister. I did everything I could to keep her alive when you were in the arena. Even when you went back for the Quell, I made sure she had more than enough to eat at Thirteen. I never meant her any harm. That may sound shallow but, it's true. I'm sorry things turned out the way they did

I know it is. Gale never lies.

I know you'll be happy with Peeta, and I know he will take care of you. I give my blessing and best wishes. All my thoughts are to you both. But from the day I first met you, and to the day I die, you're always going to be the one thing on my mind. Take care Catnip. Thanks for having my back. I hope I'll see you again one day.

Gale.

The birds have stopped singing and I'm trying to take this all in. These are his last words to me. He doesn't hate me. He loves me. He always did. I love him too. I shut my eyes but then see his face so I open them and see Rina. I stare into her blue eyes for the longest time, trying to regain myself.

My name is Katni-

I look at her eyes deeper and notice something. I don't see Peeta in her blue eyes. I see someone else. Those blue-gray eyes that I believe she had gotten from a mix of Peeta and I. But I don't see me, or Peeta. I see Prim's blue-gray eyes, which she got from my mother and father. I stare at her dark Seam hair. The way her bangs fall just by her eye. I see…

The day before my wedding I came into the woods, thinking about how my future would turn out. Would I be happy, sad, mad, glad? Relieved? Confused?

"Katniss?"

I look up and there he is, right there before me. His low comforting voice, the scent of oranges, smoke, and applewood, and his tall figure standing right there, just a few feet from me. I jump up and meet him, just like I did so many times in the past when we hunted. But right now I'm angry.

"What are you doing here?" I growl.

"Your wedding is all over the news."

"You think that makes you allowed to come?" I'm so angry right now. I'm staring at the man who killed my sister. Who didn't kill me when I screamed his name.

"Katniss…"

"Don't Katniss m-"

His lips meet mine. I close my eyes and we stand there lip to lip before we pull away. I don't say anything. I just kiss him back but then pull away as soon as I do it. "We shouldn't do this. You're just confusing me." I'm sad now.

"I think I should go."

"You should."

He just nods and turns away, walking off. I stand there, my arms cross when I'm thinking. 'What the hell am I doing?'

"Gale!"

He turns and gives his half smile and I run to him. Just one last time.

Gale isn't in District 2. He isn't necessarily in the spirit of the woods. But he is here in District 12, in another form. He lives in his daughter. Rina Lavinia Hawthorne. His wedding gift to me. Just the day before he died in a hovercraft explosion. Blown to bits like my sister. He didn't kill her. It may have been his bomb but it wasn't intended. And even if I could change the past, it all would end the same. Everybody dies. Prim would have died in the Games, or of old age, or just how she did in the Capitol. Decisions were made. I did help make them. Maybe not the bomb, but then I think of all of the sisters who died because of me. To think it all started with just a handful of berries. No. It started with love.

I sigh and take the letter from Rina, throwing into the fire. Then I hand her her father's bow. Giving it back to its rightful owner. To Gale. Who's blood is inside of his and my daughter Rina.

"I want to know about him," she says.

I nod and say. "He was one remarkable person." He was. And I'll love him until the day I die. He'll be the last thing on my mind.

The End.