A/N: Okay, here's the deal, I've read a GAZILLION fics, all Tony focused, and RARELY do I come across the oh so lovely competent Anthony DiNozzo story(yes, I am obsessed)! It upset me to know that not many people think much more of him than helpless and in need of protection! And my current fic which I am working on still, was supposed to showcase his awesome competent-ness but it's veered more toward his past and his new relationship with Gibbs and dealing with a murderous psycho who's crazy about him (and in general) and it's turned into (and I hate to say this) another semi-in-need-of-protection-from-gibbs-fic. (BTW, TO EVERYONE READING THAT ONE, IM STILL WORKING ON IT! I just had to write this cause I couldn't get it out of my head and continue my other fic otherwise .) Which is fine, I don't mind, because I hafta' admit, those are my favorite type of fics :p And therefore, because of my insane (unhealthy) love for said fics, but my constant need for competent Tony, I am writing this! Now, if you've read my other fic (Life As We Knew It) then you'll be all 'what? this is starting practically the same way -.- are you dooping us into reading the SAME story?' trust me, I'm not! I know the begining sounds very familiar but after the teams initial complaining it gets more original! (it's the same three weeks vacation thing turned long again, but only because that was the initial idea for THIS story but I ended up using it for my other story as well, which was published earlier, so, sorry for any confusion!) Tony whump will obviously be included, (in large portions, but not enough to keep him tied down to the hospital, and away from all the plot and action, I hate that) but Tony will be super competent. I hope you guys enjoy it, sorry for the gigantic, extra-long authors' note, I couldn't seem to help myself. =)

AU, I guess: Umm, Kate never died, but Ziva did join the team. Ok, that's all, not a major biggy, I think. Oh, and Tony's not who he says he is. Still damn hot though ;) Oh, and plenty of SLASH headed your way! Possible MPREG later on, depends on you guys. Not even sure if I should continue with this one. Again, that depends on if a majority of you guys would like more?

NOW on to the story...Enjoy!

ONE.

Kate groaned. "I can't believe the words are coming out of my mouth, but I can't wait for Tony to come back this Monday!"

"Same here," McGee nodded eagerly, as he packed his things, ready to go home for the weekend. "These last three weeks have been God awful."

Gibbs' team had gotten a three weeks paid vacation, as mandatory from the director, after a particularly brutal case; that had been six weeks ago. Relaxed from their individual vacation times, the team had come back, replenished. All of course, except for one Anthony DiNozzo. He'd gone off to Florida where there had later been a hurricane, and all planes had to be grounded—this lasted about three weeks.

At first, hearing that Tony would be gone an extra three weeks had made Kate grin, and she'd mocked him over the telephone. McGee had done his own share of mocking, and the two had spoken to him that morning for about ten minutes, before Gibbs had gripped the phone from their prying hands and barked, "BACK TO WORK!"

Ziva hefted her bag over her shoulder, powering down her computer simultaneously. "I too cannot await Tonys' arrival. Gibbs has been extra brutal these past couple of weeks." She added to the conversation, getting twin nods of agreement from her colleagues.

The three walked toward the elevator together, glad they'd all finished their reports and were able to go home, having left the paperwork on their grumpy boss' desk.

"I didn't realize how much of a buffer Tony really was, 'till he was gone." McGee cringed, remembering how Gibbs had nearly made him wet his pants, during the case just two days before. McGee had naively made a redundant remark about some statistic he'd read about, at a crime scene they'd been revisiting, and Gibbs had laid into him like a bulldog with a bone.

Usually, when McGee started going on and on about an inane subject, Tony was there to call him "McGeek" and then start rambling on about a movie—thus redirecting Gibbs anger onto himself. Before, Tim had always been annoyed at Tonys' interruptions, never having noticed that he was in fact shielding him from Gibbs temperament; not to mention the head slaps. Timothy rubbed the back of his head subconsciously; he didn't think he'd ever received as many head slaps in his entire three years here at NCIS as he had in the mere span of those last three weeks!

"Agreed." Ziva rubbed the back of her own head, yes, Gibbs head slaps were a thing to be remembered. "I actually miss Tony and his humor. The bullpen has been more dreadful than a cemetery."

Gibbs had not been happy without his senior field agent around, and if Gibbs wasn't happy, neither was anyone within a two point five mile radius of him, which included not only his team, but a lot of the NCIS special agents in the building, the director, Ducky, Palmer, and even Abby wasn't happy! And she was usually always in a chipper mood.

McGee and Kate nodded and they all parted ways in the parking lot, heading to their individual vehicles.

Tony walked into his empty apartment at almost four am on a Saturday morning, stretching, cracking a few bones in the process. He'd been gone a month and maybe about a week, so his frigde wasn't stocked anymore, and a light sheet of dust coated almost every surface in his apartment. He never paid for a cleaning lady, because, well, call him paranoid, but why would anyone let a stranger into their home in the middle of the day while they weren't there?

It wasn't even that he had something monetary he thought someone would want to steal-he lived in a relatively rent controlled one room apartment in a semi-bad neighborhood-who'd look at his house and think "Oh yeah, valuable stuff in there to pawn!" Yeah, no.

It was his privacy that he didn't enjoy being violated. For someone who ran into the office every Monday morning bragging about his latest conquest, Anthnony DiNozzo was an extremely private person. He knew for sure that no one from his team at NCIS had ever been to his apartment-not even Gibbs. Tony went to his cupboard and rummaged in there for a cup of ramen noodles, grinning when he found the last one at the very back, and sat at his kitchen counter, waiting for the noodles to cook in his tiny microwave.

He wondered briefly how the team had faired without him. It was weird, but he'd actually missed them. He couldn't for the life of him remember the last time he'd honest-to-God missed someone.

DING!

"Foooood!" he jumped off the counter-he also couldn't remember the last time he'd been this excited for ramen noodles. Then again, he hadn't eaten regularly in the last month. He'd skipped meals, living off granola bars Haley pestered him to eat, and the occasional health-nut smoothy Luke kept shoving down his throat. Suffice to say, Tony had lost a lot of weight, which he'd made up for in muscle. Three months ago he'd been able to belly dance, now, his stomach was so flat, it was hard enough to punch and say 'Ouch!' on.

He was kind of glad to be back; solving cases legally had to be easier than what his team back at The Program did. Undercover was practically their motto over there. At NCIS though, it wasn't often he had to go undercover. In truth, he'd felt like he was undercover playing undercover, if that made any sense. Having to downplay certain skills for no one to get suspicious was tough a lot of the time. Like that case with Jeffrey. Of course Tony had known he was the killer all along, and not the other guy-despite appearances, Tony hadn't been fooled by the act. What good would be he at his job otherwise?

He'd left a few clues he knew Gibbs and Kate would know to follow easily, hoping he wasn't over estimating either of their capabilities, and kept leading Jeffrey on a line, telling him about the places they'd go, the martinis' they'd be drinking, all the money they'd have, Jesus, they'd be rolling in it! Convincible, yeah?

Then in the car, he'd had a very small moment of doubt. Unbeknown to Gibbs or the team, he did actually know how to maneuvere an airplane, and with the connections he'd gathered over the years, he could've gotten that plane ready for them in about an hour, tops. So, no, he really hadn't been bluffing when he'd told Jeffrey they could run away together with all the money, and for a split minute, he'd thought, I could get away with this.

Yeah, not his greatest moment, even he had to admit. Running away with the bad guy? Big No-no. But it had been a tempting offer. To leave his currently hectic life with a wad of cash and a vague destination in mind? Easily the best deal he'd gotten in years.

His point being though, that it hadn't been sheer luck when he'd just happened to pull the trigger before Jeffrey had even been able to make a mark on him. Not that hard to have your gun in your hand already prepared, when you knew the guy in the backseat had a tendency to play with knives.

The hardest, though had been the undercover OP he'd done with Ziva, when they'd posed as a pregnant couple of assasins-try saying that three times fast. Knowing how to untie your restraints and kick the bad guys ass was one thing, but knowing how to be patient and wait for your team to get you out of this mess was another thing entirely. And in that case, he hadn't been able to wait. Having kicked the mans ass while still tied to the chair? That had just been icing on the cake.

Tony slurped the last of his noodles and threw away the plastic cup. Usually it would've taken at least two cups of ramen noodles and an order of orange chicken from the downstairs chineese place and maybe some white rice to fill him up, but after a month of drastically changing his eating habits, he'd just barely managed to finish that one cup before calling it quits.

He looked at his clock on the kitchen wall, it read 4:56am. He'd slept almost an entire day on the trip back, so sleep was pretty much out of the question. The time zones were hard to get used to now that he was back in DC. He might've lied to the team about where he'd been the last month or so. No, that's not right, he'd definately lied about his location; even shut off his regular work phone so that Abby wouldn't be able to track his signal and realize that he hadn't been in Florida lounging by a pool, but in Tokyo, Japan.

RING! RING! RING!

Tony nearly jumped at the familiar ringtone of his work cell in his pocket. He'd almost forgotten he'd turned it back on when his flight landed. He looked at the screen. Oh. "DiNo-"

"I know who it is, you think I'd just mark a random number on my phone and cross my fingers, see who answers?" Oh Abby; he'd missed her. "Why haven't you picked up your phone mister? You know how worried sick I've been? You didn't reply to my emails, phone calls, texts! You are in so much trouble, Anthony DiNozzo! And what are you doing up so late anyway? Or, like, so early, because that's what I am, I'm up early to go jogging with Sister Clarissa. Gotta keep my delicate figure, you know." She digressed.

Tony chuckled. "Can I come with you guys? I just got back and I can't really sleep. I'll tell you everything on the run, yeah?" If she said yes, he was officially off the hook, if not, then he was in for it on Monday.

After a small pause, wherein Abby seemed to be considering it greatly, she nodded.

"Is that a nod yes?" he asked, knowing his friend all too well by now.

She nodded again.

"Awesome. I'll be over in fifteen."

"You've got ten." she replied in her military drill sergeant voice, hanging up the phone a' la' mode Gibbs.

Tony laughed. Yeah, he had missed this place, afterall. He ran to get ready, changing into basketball shorts and a light t-shirt.

After their light jog, the three sat at Abbys kitchen table, talking over drinks.

"You've lost some weight." Sister Clarissa noted, sipping her tea.

"Yeah, everyone in Florida's like, on this crazy healthkick, figured I'd join too. Granola bars are my new chocolate bar." he grinned.

"Woah," Abby looked genuinely surprised. "Kate's been bugging at you to go on a diet for months; which, by the way, you so didn't need 'cause you looked awesome before, but it totally didn't hurt." she winked, making Tony snicker and the nun blush.

"Why thank you Miss Scutio."

"My pleasure. Now," she sat at the table to join the two, handing Tony a cup of coffee. "How was it? Didja' miss me? I missed you. And don't be fooled by Bossman and the rest of the team. They'll be all blase' about you coming back, but it's complere BS. Gibbs has been super mean since you didn't come back, Ducky's been soooo mopey it's sad, and the team is super lost without ya'.

"Like, okay, Kate, she was handed your responsibilities as senior field agent for the last three weeks you were gone and Gibbs was soooo pissed-excuse my language." she paused to give Sister Clarissa an apologetic look, and continued. "I love that woman, but she kept forgetting to gas the trunk beforehand, all those extra reports you fill before and after a case-we don't have any clue as to where you get the time to do those, Tony, I swear-and she kept complaining everytime she had to stay a few hours later to spellcheck the teams overall reports and fix a few things, which she skimmed on, so the Director ended up giving 'em back and totally embarrasing team Gibbs bigtime in front of everyone in the bullpen. And urgh, everything was super off without you there, Tony. Gibbs was extra grumpy, Kate was B-I-T-C-H-Y-"

Sister Clarissa giggled, "I can spell Abigail."

Tony snickered, shoulders shaking, at Abbys' expense, as she blushed.

"Well," she cleared her throat, "Timmy-Oh poor Timmy! He was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Kate was being all bossy, and Gibbs was being an extra brand of Gibbs, and Ziva was...threatening everyone with paperclips and your mighty mouse stapler." she cringed. Yeah, they had all been wise enough to take her threats very seriously at this point. "And, well, they're going to act like it was nothing, but you know the truth now!" she finished, looking quite proud of herself.

Tony smiled. "That's good; I missed you guys too."

"But in all seriousness, I was wondering, how do you make time to do all the senior field agent duties? I never knew you did all that stuff." she awed.

Tony shrugged, "Having no social life outside of work helps a lot." he grinned cheekily.

Abby laughed. "Hey, if you guys aren't busy I know this cute Cafe' downtown with like, the best breakfast omlets ever."

Tony and Sister Clarissa both nodded, even though Tony wasn't particularly hungry, he'd probably just end up picking at Abbys food. "Sounds good."

Monday morning came round soon enough and Tony...didn't want to get out of bed. He'd spent all day Saturday with Abby and the nun, then they'd parted ways, and Abby had taken him shopping at this new clothes place that had opened up a few weeks ago, and then she'd dragged him to a huge club she'd discovered that month-she loved it particularly for the shiny, authentic disco ball on the cieling. How could you pass up something like that?

They'd gotten home in the AM, and she'd let him crash on her couch because he'd looked so exhausted, she'd claimed. They hadn't woken up 'till early noon the next day, and caught the late Sunday mass in Spanish, so Abby had Tony translate for her, and they'd garnered odd looks-what with her spectacular outfit and his sweats.

Then they'd had brunch, and then a Stasky and Hutch marathon to end the day, before he went home and passed out on his own bed for the first time in a little more than a month.

His alarm clock read 6:38am. He figured he might as well get in the shower, get dressed, pack his backpack, and be out by 7am, giving him more than enough time to grab something to eat before he was expected at his desk. He realized he'd only eaten that one meal at Abbys home yesterday and was starving right about now.

On his way to work, Tony wolfed down a bagel and a delightful frappuccino from Starbucks. Seeing Gibbs as he exited the elevator, Tony handed him a styrophom container filled to the brim with his preferred black no sugar mix.

Gibbs could have kissed the man. So he did.

"Woah, someone's gotten daring. In plain view Jethro?" Tony blinked, but not at all shying from another well-placed kiss on his lips. Yeah, he couldn't deny it. He'd definately missed this place.

"Nobody around DiNozzo; clock just hit seven."

Tony realized he was right; his clock must've been off, he thought. But before he could come up with a snappy retort, Gibbs dragged him back into the elevator he'd just stepped foot out of a few minutes ago and hit the emergency stop button.

"One of these days you're going to break it, Boss. I'm surprised Madame Shepard hasn't caught on to-" Tonys' rambling were cut off when Gibbs crushed their lips together, pressed his body up against the side of the elevator with his own. He kissed him quite senseless, feeling him up through his clothes.

Tony melted into Gibbs' hands; they were good for much more than sanding boats, that was for sure. "Boss, not here." he panted, feeling himself go stiff, as Gibbs continued to rub against him, eliciting a strangled groan from his senior field agent. "Jesus, Gibbs." Tonys head flew back, when he felt Gibbs' hand reach into his pants, stroking what was not meant to be stroked in the workplace.

The elevator light went on, indicating someone was calling down the elevator impatiently, and it was about to override the emergency stop soon. Gibbs gave on final squeeze, making DiNozzo whimper, as he zipped up his agents pants and regained composure.

"You suck." Tony growled, glad he'd worn his black slacks, the ones that better hid his hard-on.

"My house, after work. We'll finish this." Gibbs said easily, hiding a smirk.

Tony and Gibbs had been messing around on and off for the past few months already. It was always at Gibbs house, anytime Tony initiated one of their "encounters" he always made sure it was at his Boss' home, and not his, and so far, Jethro hadn't questioned it.

It had all started after a tough case; Gibbs had been miserable and drunk, Tony had been available and drunk. They'd made it work. The morning after it had been surprisingly easy to get along with his Boss-not like they'd just fucked or anything-oh wait, they had.

Tony had stuck around and made a big breakfast, a lot of coffee, and told Gibbs flat out he didn't want a relationship. He'd said, "Rule twelve forbids it and I'm not into dating anyway, so how about a bunch of casual sex, cause I don't know about you, but last night was amazing."

Gibbs had had a weird look on his face for a second before gulping down the rest of his coffee and nodding. "Sounds good to me." he'd said, and they'd spent the rest of that Saturday together, watching tv from Gibbs black and white set in the basement, while sanding the boat, with very blase', mind-blowing sex in between.

Thinking back, he'd felt like a teenager that day, a teen who'd just discovered sex and Jesus Christ they'd mounted eachother like rabbits off their ritalin meds.

And well, they'd just continued as such afterward. There was never an awkward moment in their newfound relationship, none that he could think of anyway. It was all the great parts of a relationship without any of the drama and sharing that came with an actual relationship.

Certainly Gibbs felt likewise.

A/N: Haven't stopped working on my other story (Life As We Knew It) in case anyone's wondering, but will be working on these two simultaneously from now on. If anybody likes this one, hit the little review button, see if I should continue with this story?