Adventures in Babysitting

Starring a cranky (but caring) Archer, a hyper Speedster, and a gullible Ninja

By

Angelina

Ollie had dropped Roy off at Wayne Manor before the archer could figure out what was going on. Though he loved his little brothers he really hated it when he got conned into babysitting them while the Justice League was off on another one of their oh-so important missions. He grumbled as Bruce begin giving him the same old talk that he encountered every time he came to babysit Richard. Roy ignored most of what Bruce was saying; he had heard this spiel at least a dozen times and could probably quote it.

"Roy, are you listening to me?" Bruce's voice cut harshly into Roy's annoyed musings.

"Huh, oh yeah Bruce. Wally gets no sugar at any time, neither does Dick. Both have to be bathed and in bed by eight. Don't let Dick do acrobatics on any of the furniture and keep Wally away from the china cabinet, and anything else breakable for that matter. Emergency numbers are on the fridge and Alfred is not to be contacted, no matter what," Roy counted off the list on his fingers.

Bruce gave the archer a scathing look which said he knew that he had been ignoring his instructions. Roy shrugged; he was used to Bruce's scowls. As long as he didn't get the Bat-glare he could put up with most of Bruce's looks.

"I will call to check in when I can. Have a nice weekend," Bruce walked out the door with Ollie leaving Roy alone in the mansion with his two charges.

Wally immediately ran up to Roy and began tugging on one of his arms. "What'sfowlunch? Dowegetdessewt? Takemetothepawk,Iwanttoswing! Canweplaytag?" The hyper speedster shot off a series of requests rapid fire. Roy did not understand a word he said but figured most of it had been either about food or some game that Wally had wanted to play.

He took a firm hold of the speedster's hand and walked him into the kitchen where he fixed Wally three peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Wally eagerly set upon the food without so much as a 'thank you.' Roy refrained from rolling his eyes, he was used to this.

"Dick, where are you?" Roy had learned long ago that it was much easier to just call the ninja instead of going in search of him. That particular task could take hours...

A few minutes later a small, black haired boy poked his head around the corner, blue eyes shining as he saw his older brother standing in the kitchen with his best friend. The eight-year-old ran into the kitchen and wrapped his small arms around Roy's leg. Roy sighed, for some reason the kid had an insufferable need for physical contact.

Wally had finished his sandwiches by now and was zooming around the kitchen. "Can we play a game, Woy, please?" At ten year's old, Wally had a speech impediment that obscured most of his r's, much to Roy's displeasure.

"Sure." Roy grumbled as Wally continued to run around the kitchen, resembling a red blur.

"Yay! How 'bout tag?"

"I want to play hide-and-seek!" Dick spoke up for the first time.

"No and no," Roy pinched the bridge of his nose, remembering how disastrous both games could be when they involved a speedster and a ninja. Last time they had played hide-and-seek Roy had spent a day looking for Dick before he had finally found the eight-year-old asleep in an air vent.

"How about we walk," he paused to glare at Wally before continuing, "down to the park."

Wally nodded emphatically and Dick gave a small smile. Roy got both of them dressed for the outdoors and then made sure they each had a jacket on before he let them out the door. The walk to the park was fairly uneventful. Dick held Roy's hand the entire time and Wally chased every squirrel in sight.

Once they got to the park Wally ran off to the swings while Dick started climbing on the jungle-gym. Roy sat on a bench that had a clear view of both boys. The two friends had a fun time and even got the archer to play a game of cops and robbers with them. Roy had finally managed to catch Wally when Dick threw him at Roy, dashing off cackling as Wally was tickled mercilessly. After another half-an-hour Roy decided that it was time to go home and get dinner started. He retrieved Wally from the swings and spent fifteen minutes trying to coax Dick out of a tree before he finally climbed up after the ninja.

Back at the manor he got both boys to play Chutes and Ladders whilst he made chicken noodle soup for dinner. He looked around the kitchen for an apron before discovering that the only one in the house was a frilly pink one with 'Kiss the cook' written across it. "Bruce!" he scowled but slipped into the apron nonetheless. Ten minutes later he heard the sound of arguing from the room where he had left the two boys.

"You cheated!" Dick sounded indignant and Roy sighed, why did all of their board games end up in Wally cheating.

"No I didn't!" The young speedster protested.

"Yes you did!"

"Nu-uh!"

"Roy!" Dick wailed.

Roy walked into the room with stern look on his face. Dick immediately ran behind Roy's legs where he stuck his tongue out at Wally.

"That's enough of Chutes and Ladders." Roy took both boys into the rec room where he put on Toy Story for the two to watch while he finished dinner.

"Nice apron," Wally called as Roy exited the room.

After dinner Roy shooed both of them back to the rec room to finish the movie while he did his homework.

Barely an hour later, Dick had fallen asleep watching the movie and Roy was engrossed in his algebra. Wally took the opportunity to zip around the house looking for sweets. In the kitchen Wally found a warm plate of muffins that Roy had set out to cool for the morning's breakfast.

He quickly scarfed down two before he got an evil idea. Being the prankster that he was Wally could not resist the idea and he quickly sped off to another part of the manor. In a craft cabinet Wally found a tube of glitter-glue and spread the entire tube over the top of one of the muffins. After he was done Wally inspected his masterpiece, the glitter-glue looked like sparkly frosting on top. Little ninja would never suspect a thing.

Wally sped back into the rec room noticing that Roy's attention was still absorbed by his homework. Wally woke Dick up and handed him the cupcake. Dick eyed it suspiciously but ended up accepting it. He ate the whole thing before he noticed that it tasted off.

"What did you do to it?" Dick was upset with himself for not expecting the prank.

Wally smirked but said nothing. When Dick went to wail for Roy again Wally clapped his hand over the ninja's mouth and then tickled him until his giggles drowned out the movie.

The noise attracted Roy's attention and with a small start he realized that it was already 7:30. "Time for a bath you two." Roy said as he picked each boy up and threw them over his shoulders before they could protest.

He got both of them cleaned up and in bed by eight. They made him stay and read them a bedtime story. After that was done the archer left, dimming the lights as he did so. He knew that Dick would get nightmares if it was completely dark so he didn't turn them all the way off.

It was about midnight when Roy had finished his homework and considered going to bed. On the way to the room that Alfred always gave him he was stopped by a frightened red head.

"Woycomequick,Dick'ssick!" The speedster exclaimed as he grabbed one of Roy's arms and hauled the archer off to Dick's room.

The sight that met the archer was not pleasant. Dick was leaning over the trashcan puking his guts out; he hadn't even made it to the bathroom.

Roy walked over to the boy and saw him puke up another round of glitter… wait, glitter? The archer turned to glare at Wally as he rubbed soothing circles in Dick's back. "What did you do?"

"What makes you so suwe I did it?"

Roy glared at the speedster as Dick puked up more glitter.

Wally put both hands behind his back and looked at his feet as he scuffed the ground with his bare foot. "I may have, possibly, given him a muffin covewed in glittew-glue."

Roy facepalmed and picked Dick up, rushing him into the bathroom before he could throw up again. Fifteen minutes late Dick had stopped throwing up. The toilet was covered in a mixture of puke and glitter, as was much of the tile floor and Roy's shirt. Roy pulled a washcloth out and ran some water over it. He cleaned off Dick and himself before he tossed Wally a roll of paper towels and hoisted the exhausted eight-year-old into his arms. "Clean it up." Roy growled when Wally gave him a questioning look.

"But Wooooyyyyy!" Wally whined as he looked at the mess.

"You gave him the glitter, you clean it up. You have superspeed; it shouldn't take you that long." Roy held Dick closer to himself as the boy whimpered. He left the speedster alone in the bathroom and carried Dick to the infirmary where he hooked the boy up to an I.V. It would probably be wise to get some fluids in the boy after the amount he had just puked up.

After a few minutes the colour returned to the boy's pale face and Dick fell asleep. Roy tucked him in and slipped Batbear under his arm. The boy clutched the stuffed animal to him tightly. Roy's scowl softened at the sight.

He left Dick and walked back up to check on Wally. The speedster was done with the bathroom and was getting out of his soiled clothes and into some clean ones. Roy helped him into bed and stayed with the kid until he was asleep. He then sanitized the bathroom and stuck their soiled clothing in the washer. He fell asleep an hour later sitting next to Dick's bed.

Roy sleep was disturbed at 7 am when his cell phone rang. He pulled it out of his pocket to see Bruce's number flashing across his caller I.D. Crap, what am I going to tell him?

He answered the phone. "Wally did it!"

A/N This story was based off of an experience I had when I was five. My twin brothers decided it would be funny to feed glitter-glue to me. I spent the night with the toilet. Anyway I hoped you enjoyed it. With school starting I shall hopefully be able to update this series once a week but I can't guarantee anything.

Thanks for reading :)