Yo.

Hey look what I did! After a year of writer's block and other various...things that triumphed this story, I've finally gotten some of my shit together and wrote a chapter for this thing (even though it's a bit smaller than my usual chapter length in, well, everything I write).

And then I read Death Note porn, and all was good. Well, not really, because I just churned this out today while feeling like Death himself (pneumonia sucks and they think my cancer's back but oh well, shit rolls downhill), but when porn is involved I tend to get ideas. I just read this wickedly good fanfiction on this exact sight that's L/Raito, which usually I hate because that sonofabitch killed my man and oh hell no (wow, that sounded gay, even for me, the biggest flamer in history except not really).

So, er, the morale of that story is that you should probably recommend me porn to get the creative juices pumping? And I feel like there's a joke in there somewhere. Next subject before I say something gross.

Anywho, sorry about the wait and the fact that this chapter is unbeta'd. And I'm pretty Death Note focussed right now, so who knows, maybe I'll finish this one up before I start my other idea that I have in this fandom. Because I never leave something unfinished. Even Dance and Game will be finished. Eventually. But I will do it because I never abandon shit. Get it, got it, good.

And I've got my other account to finish up stories on too. Damn.

Ja ne!
UK.

Chapter Three
Idiots With Tunnel Vision

17 June 2002

"You lot are idiots," Hermione said.

Harry choked on his tea, the liquid burning his oesophagus as he tried to breathe. Malfoy, in all his irritating glory, demurely sat down his own teacup and frowned at the admonishment from the bushy-haired woman, clearly in better hold of his responses.

"Whatever do you mean, Granger?" asked the git in a drawl, but he wouldn't have asked had the answer not been important to him. Which meant that Malfoy had been taken by surprise, since Hermione wouldn't have called them together for simply shooting shit without anything to back it up completely.

"You have no idea what you've gotten into, d'you?" asked Hermione, unamused, as she scratched her cheek and searched for something in the paper-filled mess she called an office. Hermione was good at her job in law, even if her speciality was more along the lines of Parliament instead of being a lawyer like Malfoy, but she was the most disorganised person in the Ministry when it came to office space. At least the ordered chaos was fit to her, since she found what she had been looking for in another moment, nodding at the find without looking up.

"Nate River?" mentioned Hermione, scoffing. "Yes, so he's Harry's cousin by blood. Yes, that is a big deal. Yes, he needs to be briefed about Hogwarts and his abilities. And yes, Harry should have rights to him. But did you even think to do a check on this orphanage through Wizarding means? Why in the world didn't you come to verify with me, Draco?"

Malfoy, grimacing delicately at Hermione using his given name, said matter-of-factly and without amusement, "There was nothing that you could've given me to work with since you don't deal with the mundane Muggle rubbish."

Hermione gave the blond a scathing look that could've killed Voldemort in his tracks a few years back. "Right," she hissed condescendingly, "and the fact that your happy little orphanage you just barrelled into is a credited Wizarding establishment is completely beside the point. Idiot."

Harry could feel the blood leave his face, since he hadn't expected such a bombshell to be exploded in his face so soon after the other ones had assaulted him. In the other chair in front of Hermione's paper-covered desk, Malfoy had stopped frowning and instead had gained a contemplative expression on his face. Malfoy was obviously concocting something in that stupid head of his.

"How in the hell did a Muggle orphanage gain support to host and freely converse about the Wizarding world? I checked the stats, Granger, and that orphanage is a Muggle establishment. There is no doubt about that." Malfoy's tone was more curious than anything, a bit of fresh air from the normal drawl, but Harry didn't trust it one bit. Then again, Harry didn't trust anything Malfoy said, even though he was the best of the best, so perhaps he was warranted.

Hermione sighed and finally sat down, glancing at them with chocolate brown eyes from behind her reading glasses. "If you would've come to the law office before charging into Wammy's like imbeciles, you would've known this already. It's classified anyway, even though I'm allowed to disclose it to the both of you with permission from Kingsley." Great thing, having the Minister of Magic as a good friend, even though Malfoy's involvement was pushing it. Harry fought the urge to smirk at the thought, and instead focussed on Hermione's irritated form in from of him.

As if reading from a report — and mentally she probably was — she continued evenly, "The Wammy's House made a formal request to the Wizengamont years ago because of Albus Dumbledore investing in an orphan there. Apparently he had spoken to the orphan in question, who had been scheduled to go to Hogwarts come September, and had offered him a home there for his impending magical studies. According to record, the boy said he would think about it and then effectively told everyone in said orphanage immediately afterwards."

"Why wasn't the child reprimanded and the Aurors sent for memory modification?" shot back Malfoy, leaning forward in his chair as if truly interested.

"Well, the child was reprimanded but the damage had already been done," admitted Hermione, shifting in her chair and making a steeple out of her fingers so her chin had a resting place. "The thing was, this orphanage wasn't exactly an orphanage at all."

"So we gathered," Harry muttered, thinking of the armed guards, the clearly advanced classes, and the secrecy around the place. "What exactly occurred?" asked Harry, not particularly liking where the story was going in the slightest, throughoutly ignoring the expression of evil plans on Malfoy's face. Asking about nefarious actions to win custody in front of Hermione was an incredibly stupid idea, even Harry knew that, and he didn't want any complications. He loved Hermione dearly, but she was a stickler for the rules even in their older ages, and she would've interfered.

"The Wammy's House petitioned the Wizengamont to allow their entire population there to learn about our world. Every orphan, including probably your cousin, knows who you are and what you are capable of, regardless of their magical history or lack thereof."

Dead silence, and then Malfoy said with irritation, "That's blasphemy. Why would the court grant such permissions, when it is illegal for good reason for Muggles to know of our existence? Better yet, why didn't they just go in there with Obliviation charms at the ready and squash such a idiotic petition down?"

Hermione's gaze glazed over and she said with a slightly dreamy smile, "Because of L."

Malfoy visibly recoiled whereas Harry just sat there, completely confused. He verbalised this rather openly too: "What the fuck does that mean?"

Hermione glared at him, replacing that dreamy-eyed stare into space with annoyance, and while he was flinching from the intensity of said glare, it was better than that glazed-over shit. Familiar even. Ire he could handle from his best friend, but near veneration at something he didn't understand he could not.

Malfoy suddenly asked, "So L has something to do with Wammy's then?" So L was a person then, maybe like a code or something? No one in their right fucking mind named their kid L. Honestly.

Hermione hesitated and then stated, "Draco, he founded it. Wammy's was instated as an orphanage filled with genius children. According to the reports of the petition, most of the orphans become doctors, scientists, artists, or other such Muggle professions, and then there's another purpose. It's vague in the notes, but the most gifted of them all are in a competitions, from what I've been able to understand. They are all trying to be the next L, an heir of sorts. And considering who L is and what he accomplishes, intense knowledge in the Wizarding world is a must. It's why they were granted permission by the government instead of being subjugated to memory modification, because of L."

Definitely a person then but Harry was still at a loss. "Who is L? What does he do?"

Hermione glared again and Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Of course you wouldn't know, Potter. Only you could be completely and utterly oblivious about such a force of power such as L even after being employed in the Auror Division of the Ministry. Only you would be capable of such stupidity."

"Who is L?" Harry repeated, getting pissed and not bothered to hide it. So what if he didn't know — Muggles were usually ignored by the general Auror Division, since they were usually bystanders to stupid shit that Death Eaters concocted in their tiny little brains, and only the Obliviators in the Auror Division dealt with them. Harry's job had been to get in, blow shit up, and then apprehend the offender. The end, zip, nada, peace out bitches. He hadn't dealt with Muggles because that hadn't been part of his particular job description.

"He's only the most powerful Muggle on the face of the planet, moron," drawled Malfoy, rolling his eyes. "People even compare him to you, Scar-Head, so you should know these things."

That made Harry pause for a moment. Comparing L to Harry?What in the fuck did that even mean? What, did this weirdo have some ultra-secret alter ego as well? Did he annihilate a notorious mass-murdering criminal after a lifetime of torture too? Did he save the world from certain catastrophe and become a media sensation like Harry had? Or was it something stupid like having similar physical features or really awesome wives? People needed to get over the whole comparison thing, even though Nate was going to be royally fucked when he came to the Wizarding world.

Yeah. Comparisons. That kid was unfortunately going to be constantly compared to Harry, even though clearly the kid was twice as intelligent since he was at an orphanage specialising in raising genius children, if Hermione's assessment had any merit.

"Right. That doesn't answer my question," Harry murmured, frowning.

"I hope that kid didn't get your brains," snickered Malfoy with a snort, and Harry forced himself not to strangle his lawyer. Because that wouldn't go down very well in the middle of an official case for custody of his cousin. Murder or even attempted murder sort of put a damper on things in the real world.

"Look, Harry, do some research or something about him. Use a computer, because it'll be faster and more effective. This prat and I are going to actually sit down and discuss what we're going to do in regards to this custody case, because I'd bet my newborn that L isn't going to give him up without a fight if there is an adoption to consider," said Hermione patiently, shooting an unamused glance at the snickering Malfoy.

"Why can't we just go in there and Obliviate them all?" Harry whined.

Hermione looked at him, and her expression was unreadable. "Because it's illegal, even for you," she answered quietly. "And then there is the simple fact that you might be destroying many lives, including your cousin's."

"What d'you mean?" asked Harry, something thick curling in his chest.

Hermione's face looked pained as she answered, "He might not even want to leave."

Harry didn't respond for a long moment, and then he said to Malfoy, "Can you give me and Hermione a minute, arsehole?"

Malfoy let out a relieved sigh. "Thank Merlin, I thought you'd never ask." He practically glided out of the room, shutting it silently behind him and disappearing. Hermione waved her wand and the door locked itself yet again, another measure to ward off eavesdroppers besides the blackened windows and charms that made the room impenetrable to eyes, ears, and magic.

When he heard the door lock, he said, "Family is important. He's an orphan, Hermione, just like me, and everyone needs family even if they don't realise they're missing it."

"You don't know anything about his situation though, Harry," she answered back gently. "He's been in orphanages all of his life, because he must've been very young when his parents died, and now he's at Wammy's, which is famous for churning out four of the most famous witches and wizards in the world right now."

Harry frowned. "Who?" he asked, curious and yet dreading the answer.

"Do you know who Xedan Marconis is? What about Estellan Lamont? Mark Davidson? Lucy Davenport? Any of those names ring a bell?" At Harry's predictable blank look, she sighed with exasperation and clarified, "Mark Davidson is one of the greatest Healers in our generation. He's come up with spells and charms that cure some ailments that were fatal, and he's even developed cures for twelve types of cancer in Muggles."

Harry gaped but Hermione didn't give him a chance to recover.

"Lucy Davenport is destroying all competition in the artist industry. In the Muggle world she's phenomenon in the musical sense, and she's pretty much annihilated even the Weird Sisters on the magical charts too. Her music is breathtaking without enhancements, but with magic involved? People are starting to call her a siren from Greek legend." She took a short breath and said, "And Estellan Lamont is in my own building, my boss actually. He's revolutionising the Wizarding world with the laws he's pushing through, on equality for all beings regardless of birth or magical heritage. He's pushing for reserves of land and lakes to be cut off from all people except for centaurs, mermaids, dragons, everything. He's changing the world and he's damned good at it, someone I admire so much for his equality call in the Ministry. If I had a tenth of his talent, I'd be an unstoppable force of nature."

Harry refrained from mentioning that she already was an unstoppable force of nature, partly because he didn't want her to jinx him but mostly because he was so utterly blown away by the idea that those people had been orphans at the Wammy's House. He felt as if he couldn't even speak, but he managed to choke out, "And Xedan Marconis?"

Hermione's eyes lit up even brighter and she said with high-pitched excitement, "Marconis has invented multitudes of potions that focus on healing particular illnesses that were previously fatal, and he's been researching on the genetic mutations that result in werewolves. He might cure it, Harry."

"Oh my God," whispered Harry, the idea hitting him dead in the chest. He couldn't even imagine what such a prospect would have on the werewolf community. Sure, there were the spare few far and in-between that would defy it, but almost every werewolf would've given up everything but their lives on a cure. They would be normal again, able to have families without the fearful possibility of mutated children or murdering their spouses, able to hold down jobs, able to stop the unimaginable pain that came with the transformation, able to have dinner with friends and family without the judgement or the abhorrent behaviour, and even able to sleep peacefully at night knowing that they were never going to potentially kill another human being when transformed and mindless.

So many lives saved from mental, physical, and emotional torture, from death itself.

Remus Lupin would have wept in joy at such a cure.

Hermione said softly, "I know. When the news came out that he was starting testing on volunteers, I swear to Merlin I cried like a child. Can you imagine what that would do to the werewolf population out there? Can you imagine, Harry, what that would do for the world, Wizarding or Muggle? A cure, Harry. Just imagine."

Harry simply sat in his chair, trying to absorb such an idea. The implications if it succeeded was insane to even contemplate, and if it did work then perhaps there was a chance for others. Vampires, specifically, who were just as desperate for a cure as the werewolves.

God.

"A classified portion of our office keeps tabs on that orphanage. I'm not given all of the notes on it, because only a select few are allowed due to security issues for L, but I know that those who live at that orphanage go out and do remarkable things for Muggles and wizards alike. L himself is a universal good, since he saves so many lives doing what he does." Harry opened his mouth to inquire about what L did exactly, yet again, but Hermione continued, "So just imagine what Near is living like at that place, where brilliant and pure minds are being formed."

His voice was pinched, like it was painful to speak, as he interrupted, "But he's family. I can't just abandon him there with strangers, even if they are giving Nate a good home and education. He's family, Hermione, and I want to be a major part of his life."

"You can be a major part in his life without forcing him to leave the only life he's probably ever known. And you're the stranger to him, Harry, not those people that are teaching him what he needs to know to be successful in this world and the Muggle one."

"Are you trying to talk me out of fighting for my rights?!" Harry bellowed, standing up. He wasn't sure why he was yelling, because he wasn't even angry. He felt so confused and torn about everything, because families needed each other to survive and not having that with the only blood relative that was magical like him was agony. But Hermione's words kept echoing in his mind and he hated that, hated the idea that he would feel even the slightest bit guilty about fighting for custody of his cousin.

Sure, that orphanage was a great thing for orphans, and made them into needed and much-appreciated members of society. But Nate had a family in Harry and Ginny, had a family in James and Teddy, and to not jump on that seemed evil. Nate wasn't alone like the others were, and Harry wasn't like the Dursleys. He would take care of that child like a king would take care of his child, and he would never need or want again. He would have everything, and they could be a family.

"I'm saying that you should go to that orphanage and talk to Nate, see what he wants, give him the options!" Hermione yelled right back. "You should have rights to be a part of his life, but you have no right to strip a child of his home if he does not want to leave! He's young but he doesn't need a dictator to run his life for him; he's been submersed in an environment that challenges his intelligence daily, and that's the best thing for him! You can still be a damn family even without living in the same household, like you and the Dursleys!"

"I'm nothing like the Dursleys!" Harry roared, and that made him furious.

"I know you're not, but it's the same concept!" Hermione practically shrieked. By that point they were in each other's red faces, baring teeth and trying to scream logic into the other's brain, even though their logic was completely different. "It won't kill you to get your head out of your arse and simply ask Nate what he wants to do, be it to push for his adoption by you or staying at Wammy's to get his magical education there! Listen to reason!"

And on and on it went. They bellowed at each other, at one point curses flying even though they would never actually hurt the other, and after an hour of wearing themselves out, they both collapsed on the floor next to a few metre-high stacks of paperwork. They leant upon each other, breathing heavily and staring at their various new additions, like Harry's lime green arm hair and Hermione's purple skin.

She was right, though, and Harry knew it. He was infamous for being a hot-head, and he had approached the situation with Nate with just that. He hadn't even though about what would happen afterwards, completely focussed on bringing Nate into his home where he supposedly belonged without any reasonable doubt.

Harry hadn't looked past that, at all of the things that could've been wrong about that. Maybe Nate didn't want to leave his friends, his adoptive family. Maybe Nate was getting a better education than he would at Hogwarts, especially if those other wizards had anything to show about the magical education at Wammy's. Maybe Nate, being eleven and young, wouldn't assimilate very well with a new home like Harry's, especially since the orphanage was a silent, all-but invisible safe-house due to the mysterious L and Harry lived in a place constantly surrounded by paparazzi with a newborn baby boy, a fiery wife, a Metamorphagus kid that practically lived with them with the amount of time he was over, and ten thousand Weasleys that invaded as if they owned the place.

Harry didn't know what Nate wanted, because he had just assumed that he would immediately want family. Hell, maybe he did, but Harry didn't know for sure, and he had to know before making decisions that could potentially scar Nate for the rest of his life. And that was something that Harry most certainly did not want for his long-lost cousin. Not at all.

Harry didn't say anything to Hermione, because they didn't need words. Hermione knew that Harry, regardless of the wishes of the Wammy's House and even Nate himself, would have some sort of relationship with his cousin, even if it was small. Even if the orphanage fought with him tooth-and-nail and Nate turned out to be a demon child, Harry would have a relationship with Nate.

His sense of family was too strong to deny himself that.

But he wouldn't destroy the kid's life either. He would do anything to avoid that.

Besides, maybe Nate would want to live with Harry despite all of the conflicting thoughts that Harry had churning in his head. Maybe he would end up getting custody anyway, and everything would be just like in Harry's imagination, with family dinners and celebrating obnoxiously when Nate graduated Hogwarts and Merlin knew what else.

Regardless, he had to figure out what Nate wanted. Harry stood up and went to find Malfoy without saying a word to Hermione — she knew Harry, and she knew in her heart that he was grateful for her — because he needed to mend some bridges before he fucked up any more than he already had. And if that meant kissing the mysterious, awed L's arse, then so be it.

He would do anything for his family, and that was a goddamn fact.