Written for the Day By Drabble Blue Skies Event on Livejournal.

Prompt #23: photo of cracked dirt

Author's Note: This is kind of a silly companion fic to Feeding the Multitude, and it references the giant scorpion incident in Storm Front, hence the title.

I stepped out of the Way and squinted. "What fresh hell is this?"

"New Mexico," Carlos intoned, holding his arms out dramatically. "The Land of Enchantment."

"Not as much fun as Old Mexico," Bill said thoughtfully, pushing up the brim of his straw cowboy hat.

Ramirez grinned, snapped his fingers and mimed shooting at Meyers. "The land of tequila."

I blinked a few times. All I could see was acres of cracked, sandy ground and a rippling haze of heat. There were mountains in the distance, far enough away to look like clouds sitting on the horizon.

"No," I said, looking around. "No, our away team took a wrong turn somewhere in Faerie and ended up on Tattooine. Or Arrakis. Or in the middle of the Gobi freaking Desert."

Carlos pulled a folded up piece of paper from a pocket – a map. He was dressed kind of like the raptor guy from the first Jurassic Park movie, minus the nifty gun. I didn't tell him I had no intentions of resurrecting another prehistoric pal; it probably would have broken his little heart.

Meyers and I had apparently gone the same route, clothing-wise; boots, jeans, light-colored shirts. He had a machete, though, whereas I had a shotgun slung over one shoulder on the leather strap usually attached to my guitar. And a big stick.

"There's an old mining town near here, the captain wanted us to check it out first, make sure there's water and everything for the camp."

We found our heading and walked for at least an hour before reaching a stand of scrubby pinyon pines and a small watering hole in the midst of some red rock formations.

"Let's stop here in the shade for a few. I'm sweatin' like a whore in church."

We found the shadiest spot and sat down, passing around a canteen. About ten minutes had passed when Carlos, perched on a rock a couple yards away, pointed at the ground to my left.

"Harry, you've got a...uh. A problem."

I looked at where he was pointing – a half-dozen large yellowy-brown scorpions were sunning themselves a few inches away. There were two on my hand.

…I might have panicked a little bit.

I may have said a few very bad words and jumped to my feet and possibly fired a round from my sawed-off shotgun into the dirt where I'd been sitting.

"I had a bad experience," I said, after the noise of the shot had died down.

They both stared at me.

"Granted, that one was about the size of my car, but you can never be too careful when it comes to anything with an exoskeleton."

Carlos nodded skeptically, then turned to Bill and muttered something in Spanish about the dubiousness of my sanity.

"I heard that, cabrón."

He grinned. "Tu hablas español?"

"No, but I had a girlfriend once and she used to say that a lot."

"See, I could almost believe you, but you used the word 'girlfriend.'"

"Let's get a move on," said Bill. "Before Dresden blows up any more of the wildlife."

"Hey," I said as I reloaded, snapped the break-barrel shut and slung it over one shoulder. "You'll thank me if we come across any of those big rabbits with antlers."

"Jackalopes?" he ventured.

"Thanks for offering, man, but I like women."

reviews? :D