A crappy little oneshot my friend Emi (WHO STILL NEEDS AN ACCOUNT) did just about a year ago. I assure you - we've both gotten better at writing since then. I dunno, we might even do another one like this, except, well...better, haha. Enjoy.

Edit:: Hey guys. Decided to revise a bit - fix a few things here and there. Yada, yada, yada. Reviews and favs welcome as always. :)

Heavy boots clunked on thick, polished wooden floors, the man who owns them calling out a nickname for the smaller man he was following.

"You never let me do anything! I hate you so much-just go die in a hole and let the world be happy..." A loud yell echoed through the dim hallways and corridors, accompanying the light boot thumps that were aimed for the large, heavy, cherry-colored door. Then, the door swung open and an albino man swiftly walked though the opened passage, set on getting away rapidly.

The Russian who owns the mansion-and the albino, for that matter-smiled.

"But if Mother Russia were to die...Prussiya would die as well!" He called out, then simply walked out of the house as well, following his 'pet' which he had recently gotten. "You know you can't escape, Malutka." Reaching out his gloved hand, Russia grabbed onto the Prussian's arm.

"Become one with me, da?" His usual question-the one that Prussia could not say 'no' to.

"Screw you, Commie! Stop talking to me as well. I don't want to hear your stupid voice." Prussia continued to briskly walk away, flashing a gloved middle finger at Russia and calling him obscene names in German. Russia just kept following the albino, still trying to hold onto his arm.

"But Mother Russia screws you, Krolik! You don't screw Mother Russia." He stated cheerfully, reaching down with his other hand to grope the thinner man's ass. "Ahu~ Such a nice, feminine body..."

"Kya!" Prussia jumped just about twenty feet in the air, surprised at the sudden action. "Keep your fucking hands off me! That's it, I'm out of here. I am so sick of you and your fucking twisted sense of humor!" With that, Prussia bolted away, making mad dashes around trees and bushes, reminding him of his childhood while looking for cover far away from Russia.

Russia just giggled and pulled out a thick, chunky tracking device from his pocket. "Aha, this is how I always find you, Prussiya!" he announced in a sing-song voice to the air around him. He followed the device's radar, and before he reached where it said Prussia was, he slipped the device back in his pocket. "Krolik? I found you! You need to work on hiding!"

Prussia stayed silent from his perch in a tall tree's branch, hoping the Russian was just trying to make him give up when he really hadn't seen him at all, so he wouldn't drag him back to the house and 'punish' him for running away...again. Inching away from the main trunk of the tree, he allowed himselg to carefully lay himself down on his stomach so his legs wouldn't be as tired if he had to run for it.

Russia looked around the tree, the pulled out the tracking device again. Smiling, he looked up, spotting the scarlet-eyed man.

"Privet, little snow bunny!" He mused, grabbing Prussia's foot and tugging on it. "You come down for punishment, da? Or will I have to go get the soldiers...?"

A dark aura then surrounded the Russian as he started to pull harder on the silverette's leg, threatening to make him fall, chanting an odd but unnerving 'Kolkolkol...'.

"Commie bastard! Get off of me!" Desperately kicking his leg to try and get rid of the Russian, Prussia lost his balance and slipped off the branch, falling to the ground. "Ow! Motherfucker, my ass! Son of a bitch!" Prussia howled, leaning forward and rubbing his bruised tailbone.

Russia couldn't help but stare while the Prussian rubbed his ass. "Prussiya," he began, "You're going to become one with me... Now." Smiling innocently, he bent down and pushed Prussia against the wide and sturdy tree, slipping his hand up the man's shirt.

"Your body is...so very feminine."

"Gah, what the fuck? Get your filthy hand out of my shirt, Red!" Prussia exclaimed, biting back a moan but blushing thoroughly. He put up a wear fight, trying to push Russia away, almost letting himself be taken right there when the Communist tweaked one of his nipples slightly.

"This-ah!-is so...unawesome..."

Russia giggled. "Oh, but it will be 'awesome' soon, Malutka!" He whispered, his hands ghosting over the albino's pale skin. Smirking, the Russian forced a kiss on the Prussian male pressed against the tree bark. "I will take you now, da?"

Seductively, the taller man kissed down Prussia's neck and jawline. "You are mine, Prussiya. Remember that..."

"Ah, nein..." the other mumbled, but tilted his head to the side so the other could get better access. "This is... We shouldn't be doing this..." Moaning finally and closing his eyes, the silverette lost the last of his resolve, giving in fully. "Fine, do it. But on one condition..." Scarlet eyes clouded with lust opened and moved to gaze at Russia impatiently.

Russia stopped his movements for a minute and tilted his head to the side. "And what condition is that, Prussiya?" He asked in a sing-song voice, going back to kiss the albino's forehead, stroking his cheek and smirking darkly.

Prussia smirked back. "Never tell West, alright? That'll lodge the stick up his ass further." Then he leaned in, grabbing the front of Russia's coat, and kissed him roughly, attempting to dominate the kiss by pushing his tongue into the larger man's mouth.

The Russian chuckled and bit down on Prussia's tongue. "Silly little Krolik, Mother Russia tops. Especially when it's you!" he teased, breaking the kiss to literally rip off Prussia's shirt and pull slim hips into his own. "You have such pale white skin... This position seems fun, da?"

The albino growled and pushed down on Russia's chest, forcing him onto his back. "Perfect, liebe... Just wunderbar..." Mumbling in a low, seductive tone, the pale man started to nibble on the taller man's neck, then licked the bruises that formed shortly after.

"Nyet, nyet, little Krolik." Russia chuckled again and gripped onto the thin hips on top of him, and pulling up, forcing him to get up. "Russia is in control." Growling, standing up and pinning the smaller man's hands above his head.

"Did I ever say you weren't?" Prussia snarled, but let himself be pushed back up against the wood.

"Prussia is a virgin, da? At least…that's what France told me." the other said nonchalantly, tilting his head to the side. Taking both of the Prussian wrists in one hand, Russia reached down to swiftly unbutton the albino's pants. "That means that Mother Russia will break you…"

The shorter man made a mental note to kill his so-called 'friend' later and assisted Russia with his pants, but hid his embarrassment behind an expertly crafted mask of cockiness. "Fuck France! I've done this a million and a half times."

"Most of them with yourself, da?" The Communist smiled teasingly, looking down at Prussia's familiar looking boxers, running a long finger along the waist band and leaning in to whisper in the man's ear. "Hm, Russian flag boxers, Prussiya? Oh, my naughty little Krolik!"

Prussia swore his boxers got a bit too tight at that moment, and impossibly tight when his 'owner' bent down and started kissing down his chest, latching on a nipple for a minute, then moving downwards until he was crouching, face level with his pet's erection.

"Dude, uncalled for…!" Prussia silenced himself by biting his lower lip while blushing profusely, staring down at the face a mere inch from his need. "There's a fucking list of people who are for me to fuck whenever I like it, for your information!"

Russia giggled once again. "Your reactions are so funny! I'm sure you've 'fucked' many people, Krolik. Now, relax." He breathed hotly on the clothed hardness, grinning at the sharp intake of air and a moan from the man in front of him.

"I'm dead serious… People would worship my awesome by loaning me their bodies for as long as I wanted. Of course, that was back when I was younger, but just as handsome, mind you!"

"Prussiya, I believe it's time you shut up and loaned me your body to someone else for a while, da?" Russia interrupted, palming Prussia through the Russian flag boxers. "Besides, it's cold out here and we need to warm up…"

"Heh, I suppose we do…" a gleam sparked in the Prussian's eyes, threading his fingers in the Russian's soft hair.

The Russian chuckled, standing up and earning a whine from Prussia.

"Hey, get back down there!" the thinner man demanded, desperation and lust evident in his voice.

"Nyet. The bottom does not command the top in any situation, political or personal." On the last word, Russia squeezed the bulge in the other's pants, then slipped his hand all the way inside, enjoying the squeak emitted from Prussia.

"Ah! Russia…" Scarlet eyes were only half-open by now, focusing only on the hand stroking him, not caring if he crumpled into a boneless heap. Then, Russia decided to pull his hands up and shove the silverette against the tree again, Prussia instinctively yelping and wrapping his legs around his waist.

"Aha, so impatient!" Russia laughed before undoing his own pants and pulling down his gray boxers.

"Shut up! Holy shit…" Prussia stared down at the large, hard-as-a-rock Russian dick, mouth open a bit. "Will that god damn thing fit?"

"Da, it should. Maybe not right away, though…" Russia smiled back at him, taking off one of his gloves and sticking three fingers in front of the Prussian's face. "Suck."

Prussia crossed his arms, solely relying on his legs around Russia's waist to hold him up. "If I don't?"

"Ah, comrade, it will hurt more than you think."

"…Ugh, fine." Groaning, the Prussian took the fingers in his mouth, coating them in saliva and making lewd faces while doing so, the Russian moaned softly, watching him like a hawk. When Russia deemed it enough, he pulled his fingers away and grinned.

"I don't think I'm going to prepare you, actually, since you seem to have done this 'a million and a half times'…" Smirking, the taller man tore off Prussia's boxers, freeing his trapped erection and lining himself up at his entrance.

"What?" Prussia yelled, face twisting in fury and fear. "But you said…!"

"Enough, Prussiya." And with that, the Russian thrust in, making the other shriek in pain, tensing up visibly and gripping onto Russia's shoulders, digging into the skin.

"Ow, god dammit! Stop! Stop!" Tears leaked out from Prussia's eyes, and his chest heaved, feeling like his ass and back was getting ripped in half. "S-shit…."

"Relax, Krolik." Russia grunted, pushing in until he couldn't get any deeper, blood lubricating his the last part of his invasion. "I'm in… Tell me when, da?"

"Yeah, yeah… Owww…" Prussia was stubbornly refusing to cry more than needed, only having let some tears drip down his cheeks onto his chest. "Dammit, I bet there's…there's so many fucking splinters in my back right now." Forcing a grin, Prussia stared at Russia with wet, glassy eyes.

True to his word, Russia didn't move until Prussia was ready, and for this the Prussian was extremely grateful.

"Alright, move…"

"Okay..." Russia started slowly pulling back out, then thrust back in deeply.

Prussia groaned, using one arm to cover his eyes, leaning his head back against the tree. "Dammit, hurry up. I don't have all day…" Pain was starting to numb into pleasure, thanks to Russia's cock getting dangerously close to the special bundle of nerves located deep inside his ass.

"As you wish, Malutka…" Smirking, Russia plunged deeper, aiming a different way and hitting the prostate of his pet directly, causing the Prussian to yelp and arch into Russia's chest, stars momentarily flashing in front of his eyes.

"A-ah! Right there…! Keep hitting right there!" Prussia ordered, to which the Russian agreed by thrusting harder and faster into the willing body. Prussia threw his head back and moaned before closing his eyes and reaching down between his legs to stroke himself. With the combined pleasures, Prussia didn't last much longer, eventually coming hard onto his stomach while a white light and stars flashed behind his eyelids.

"Ah, Prussiya…" Feeling Prussia clench even tighter around him, the Russian thrust a couple more times before releasing as well, deep inside of the Prussian's ass, then pulled out, eyeing the blood mixed with his semen drip out of the abused entrance.

"Ngh… Shit." Prussia shakily put his legs back down, feeling his body protest by sending a crashing wave of pain throughout his body, so he immediately fell against Russia.

"Woah, easy, Krolik…" the Russian smiled and caught the albino, lifting him up and snuggling him against his chest.

"My ass hurts. You owe me, you know." Scarlet eyes closed, head leaning against the broad chest pressed against him.

"I owe you nothing." Smiling, Russia zipped his pants back up and gathered up their abandoned clothing, throwing it on top of Prussia's figure.

"Yeah, you do… But not now; I'm tired as fuck, and I need sleep."

"Alright. Take a nap and we'll be home before you can even get into your first dream."

"Whatever. Hey, Ivan?"

The Russian's heart leapt at the use of his human name. "Da?"

"Ich lieb-eh, fuck it. Wake me up when you have pain meds and food ready." And Prussia promptly fell fast asleep while Russia just grinned and started walking home.

"Ya tebya lyblyu, Krolik."